| 1/21/2013 1:34:37 PM |
Va chat closed due to lack of quality posters :( |
|
hamlin11
Radford, VA
45, joined Dec. 2007
|
Made you l@@k
Make a joke, complaint,proposal of interest,
Donation to
<~~~~ mofuggers of America 
Seriously peeps lets shake this mofugger awake 
Meet singles at DateHookup.dating, we're 100% free! Join now!
|
| 1/21/2013 5:19:29 PM |
Va chat closed due to lack of quality posters :( |
|
vaegood
Harrisonburg, VA
56, joined May. 2007
|
 mofuggers unite 
|
| 1/21/2013 5:27:47 PM |
Va chat closed due to lack of quality posters :( |
|
vaegood
Harrisonburg, VA
56, joined May. 2007
|
 another quality poster
|
| 1/22/2013 8:16:41 AM |
Va chat closed due to lack of quality posters :( |
|
vaegood
Harrisonburg, VA
56, joined May. 2007
|
  "Things You'd Love To Say But Don't Dare"
I can see your point, but I still think you're full of crap.
I don't know what your problem is, but I'll bet it's hard
to pronounce.
How about never? Is never good for you?
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate
yourself in public.
I'm really easy to get along with once you people
learn to worship me.
I'll try being nicer if you'll try being smarter.
I'm out of my mind, but feel free to leave a message.
I don't work here. I'm a consultant.
It sounds like English, but I can't understand a word
you're saying.
Ahhh...I see the screw-up fairy has visited us again...
I like you. You remind me of when I was young and
stupid.
You are validating my inherent mistrust of strangers.
I have plenty of talent and vision, I just don't give a
darn.
Visualizing? I'm already visualizing the duct tape over
your mouth.
I will always cherish the initial misconceptions I had
about you being competent.
Thank you. We're all refreshed and challenged by your
unique point of view.
The fact that no one understands you doesn't mean
you're an artist.
Any connection between your reality and mine is
purely coincidental.
What am I?... Flypaper for freaks!
And your cry-baby whiny-butt opinion would be...?
Do I look like a people person?
I started out with nothing & still have most of it left.
Sarcasm is just one more service we offer.
If I throw a stick, will you leave?
Errors have been made. Others will be blamed.
Whatever kind of look you were going for, you
missed.
I'm trying to imagine you with a personality.
A cubicle is just a padded cell without a door.
Can I trade this job for what's behind door #1?
Nice perfume. Must you marinate in it?
CHAOS, PANIC, & DISORDER - my work here is
done.
How do I set a laser printer to stun?
I thought I wanted a career, turns out I just
wanted paychecks.
No trees were used creating this post but a couple million electrons were highly annoyed!
|
| 1/22/2013 11:50:57 AM |
Va chat closed due to lack of quality posters :( |
|
hamlin11
Radford, VA
45, joined Dec. 2007
|
Ed good to see your still Rawkin bro
|
| 1/22/2013 12:01:42 PM |
Va chat closed due to lack of quality posters :( |
|
vaegood
Harrisonburg, VA
56, joined May. 2007
|
 Roundy round we go hammy
|
| 1/22/2013 12:05:00 PM |
Va chat closed due to lack of quality posters :( |
|
hamlin11
Radford, VA
45, joined Dec. 2007
|
Did you have your coffee yet ed ??
Lol
|
| 1/22/2013 4:52:22 PM |
Va chat closed due to lack of quality posters :( |
|
vaegood
Harrisonburg, VA
56, joined May. 2007
|
yep and you better go low in turn #2 ya knuckle draggin, nose pickin. butt scratchin, yota drivin, oil leakin scrap heap
|
| 1/23/2013 9:37:25 AM |
Va chat closed due to lack of quality posters :( |
|
xxxprototypexxx
Emporia, VA
30, joined Aug. 2012
|
|
| 1/23/2013 11:55:22 AM |
Va chat closed due to lack of quality posters :( |
|
hamlin11
Radford, VA
45, joined Dec. 2007
|
Lmao ^^^ what have I created here?
|
| 1/23/2013 2:05:08 PM |
Va chat closed due to lack of quality posters :( |
|
vaegood
Harrisonburg, VA
56, joined May. 2007
|
 hammy looks like you started another multi car pileup to me
|
| 1/23/2013 4:33:46 PM |
Va chat closed due to lack of quality posters :( |
|
hamlin11
Radford, VA
45, joined Dec. 2007
|
Lmao you 2 ....ask and you shall receive .....
Well this mofugger is officially awake now !!!
Dare I say let's get some hotties in on the party ??
|
| 1/23/2013 5:44:24 PM |
Va chat closed due to lack of quality posters :( |
|
vaegood
Harrisonburg, VA
56, joined May. 2007
|
|
| 1/24/2013 6:24:43 AM |
Va chat closed due to lack of quality posters :( |
|
vaegood
Harrisonburg, VA
56, joined May. 2007
|
Humorous Headlines
Include Your Children when Baking Cookies
Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Expert Says
Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers
Safety Experts Say School Bus Passengers Should Be Belted
Drunk Gets Nine Months in Violin Case
Survivor of Siamese Twins Joins Parents
Iraqi Head Seeks Arms
British Left Waffles on Falkland Islands
Eye Drops Off Shelf
Teacher Strikes Idle Kids
President Wins on Budget, But More Lies Ahead  
Enraged Cow Injures Farmer with Ax
Plane Too Close to Ground, Crash Probe Told
Miners Refuse to Work after Death
Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant
|
| 1/24/2013 3:06:42 PM |
Va chat closed due to lack of quality posters :( |
|
vaegood
Harrisonburg, VA
56, joined May. 2007
|
 No purchase required.... Details Inside
If you don't understand what your writing you should let a smarter DH member write it!
|
| 1/24/2013 4:31:27 PM |
Va chat closed due to lack of quality posters :( |
|
vaegood
Harrisonburg, VA
56, joined May. 2007
|
Great As Humor, Bad As Ads"
2 female Boston Terrier puppies, 7 wks old,
Perfect markings, 555-1234. Leave mess.
Lost: small apricot poodle. Reward. Neutered.
Like one of the family.
A superb and inexpensive restaurant. Fine food
expertly served by waitresses in appetizing forms.
Dinner Special -- Turkey $2.35; Chicken or
Beef $2.25; Children $2.00.
For sale: an antique desk suitable for lady with
thick legs and large drawers.
Four-poster bed, 101 years old. Perfect for antique
lover.
Now is your chance to have your ears pierced and
get an extra pair to take home, too.
Wanted: 50 girls for stripping machine operators
in factory.
Wanted: Unmarried girls to pick fresh fruit and
produce at night.
We do not tear your clothing with machinery. We
do it carefully by hand.
For Sale -- Eight puppies from a German Sheppard
and an Alaskan Hussy.
Great Dames for sale.
Have several very old dresses from grandmother
in beautiful condition.
Tired of cleaning yourself? Let me do it.
Dog for sale: eats anything and is fond of children.
Vacation Special: have your home exterminated.
Mt. Kilimanjaro, the breathtaking backdrop for the
Serena Lodge. Swim in the lovely pool while you
drink it all in.
Get rid of aunts: Zap does the job in 24 hours.
Toaster: A gift that every member of the family
appreciates. Automatically burns toast.
Sheer stockings. Designed for fancy dress, but
so serviceable that lots of women wear nothing
else.
Stock up and save. Limit: one.
For Rent: 6-room hated apartment.
Man, honest. Will take anything.
Man wanted to work in dynamite factory. Must
be willing to travel.
UsedCars: Why go elsewhere to be cheated?
Come here first!
Christmans tag-sale. Handmade gifts for the
hard-to-find person.
Wanted: Hair-cutter. Excellent growth potential.
Wanted. Man to take care of cow that does not
smoke or drink.
3-year-old teacher need for pre-school. Experience
preferred.
Our experienced Mom will care of your child.
Fenced yard, meals, and smacks included.
Our bikinis are exciting. They are simply the tops.
Auto Repair Service. Free pick-up and delivery.
Try us once, you'll never go anywhere again.
Illiterate? Write today for free help.
Girl wanted to assist magician in cutting-off-
head illusion. Blue Cross and salary.
Wanted. Widower with school-age children
requires person to assume general housekeeping
duties. Must be capable of contributing to growth
of family.
And now, the Superstore--unequaled in size,
unmatched in variety, unrivaled inconvenience.
We will oil your sewing machine and adjust tension
in your home for $1.00.
|
| 1/24/2013 4:50:24 PM |
Va chat closed due to lack of quality posters :( |
|
hamlin11
Radford, VA
45, joined Dec. 2007
|
I saw a post in the news paper that says "we buy god , any condition, top price paid "
I think they meant gold , lol but its worth a shot ,lmao
|
| 1/25/2013 6:44:56 AM |
Va chat closed due to lack of quality posters :( |
|
vaegood
Harrisonburg, VA
56, joined May. 2007
|
I doubt the warning PARENTAL SUPERVISION REQUIRED! ever stopped you hammy
|
| 1/25/2013 10:49:42 AM |
Va chat closed due to lack of quality posters :( |
|
vaegood
Harrisonburg, VA
56, joined May. 2007
|
Do any of you text? These were new to me!
Young people have theirs, now seniors have their own texting codes:
* ATD - At the doctor's
* BFF - Best friend’s funeral
* BTW - Bring the wheelchair
* BYOT - Bring your own teeth
* CBM - Covered by Medicare
* CUATSC - See you at the Seniors’ Centre
* DWI - Driving while incontinent
* FWIW - Forgot where I was
* GGPBL - Gotta go, pacemaker battery low
* GHA - Got heartburn again
* HGBM - Had good bowel movement
* LMDO - Laughing my dentures out
* LOL - Living on Lipitor
* OMSG - Oh my! Sorry, gas
* TOT - Texting on toilet
* WAITT - Who am I talking to?
Hope these help. GGLKI (gotta go, laxative kicking in)
|
| 1/25/2013 8:05:04 PM |
Va chat closed due to lack of quality posters :( |
|
vaegood
Harrisonburg, VA
56, joined May. 2007
|
but say it to a Holstein
|
| 1/26/2013 2:21:47 PM |
Va chat closed due to lack of quality posters :( |
|
hamlin11
Radford, VA
45, joined Dec. 2007
|
I doubt the warning PARENTAL SUPERVISION REQUIRED! ever stopped you hammy
Not once
|
| 1/29/2013 9:46:14 AM |
Va chat closed due to lack of quality posters :( |
|
vipir35
Courtland, VA
56, joined Sep. 2011
|
WHAT THE HELL....
|
| 1/30/2013 9:20:35 AM |
Va chat closed due to lack of quality posters :( |
|
greenidlady34
Mechanicsville, VA
46, joined Jan. 2013
|
Lmao you 2 ....ask and you shall receive .....
Well this mofugger is officially awake now !!!
Dare I say let's get some hotties in on the party ??
what do you consider a "hottie"?
|
| 1/30/2013 9:56:36 AM |
Va chat closed due to lack of quality posters :( |
|
hamlin11
Radford, VA
45, joined Dec. 2007
|
what do you consider a "hottie"?
Actually, (and this is well documented in 40s chat !)
I like thick redhead girls 
So you fit the bill 
|
| 1/30/2013 9:59:22 AM |
Va chat closed due to lack of quality posters :( |
|
hamlin11
Radford, VA
45, joined Dec. 2007
|
Hammy, I think you need a warning on you saying "Cougar SUPERVISION REQUIRED"
Fixed it
|
| 1/31/2013 8:59:24 AM |
Va chat closed due to lack of quality posters :( |
|
greenidlady34
Mechanicsville, VA
46, joined Jan. 2013
|
^^^^^
|
| 1/31/2013 9:38:54 AM |
Va chat closed due to lack of quality posters :( |
|
vaegood
Harrisonburg, VA
56, joined May. 2007
|
|
| 1/31/2013 9:51:33 AM |
Va chat closed due to lack of quality posters :( |
|
greenidlady34
Mechanicsville, VA
46, joined Jan. 2013
|
OUCH!! 
|
| 1/31/2013 9:58:59 AM |
Va chat closed due to lack of quality posters :( |
|
vaegood
Harrisonburg, VA
56, joined May. 2007
|
ahh but you were warned 
|
| 1/31/2013 10:30:06 AM |
Va chat closed due to lack of quality posters :( |
|
greenidlady34
Mechanicsville, VA
46, joined Jan. 2013
|
|
| 1/31/2013 11:27:55 AM |
Va chat closed due to lack of quality posters :( |
|
vaegood
Harrisonburg, VA
56, joined May. 2007
|
|
| 1/31/2013 11:49:52 AM |
Va chat closed due to lack of quality posters :( |
|
greenidlady34
Mechanicsville, VA
46, joined Jan. 2013
|
yeah...my 2 year old didn't like that one...LMAO
|
| 1/31/2013 11:56:56 AM |
Va chat closed due to lack of quality posters :( |
|
vaegood
Harrisonburg, VA
56, joined May. 2007
|
This isn't a poster but it might come in handy
|
| 1/31/2013 11:58:59 AM |
Va chat closed due to lack of quality posters :( |
|
greenidlady34
Mechanicsville, VA
46, joined Jan. 2013
|
|
| 1/31/2013 2:27:19 PM |
Va chat closed due to lack of quality posters :( |
|
greenidlady34
Mechanicsville, VA
46, joined Jan. 2013
|
|
| 1/31/2013 2:40:47 PM |
Va chat closed due to lack of quality posters :( |
|
vaegood
Harrisonburg, VA
56, joined May. 2007
|
|
| 1/31/2013 3:48:12 PM |
Va chat closed due to lack of quality posters :( |
|
hamlin11
Radford, VA
45, joined Dec. 2007
|
That's not my kind of p*ssy .....lmao
|
| 1/31/2013 3:58:07 PM |
Va chat closed due to lack of quality posters :( |
|
greenidlady34
Mechanicsville, VA
46, joined Jan. 2013
|
meow 
|
| 1/31/2013 4:39:49 PM |
Va chat closed due to lack of quality posters :( |
|
vaegood
Harrisonburg, VA
56, joined May. 2007
|
I thought hammy was around here
|
| 2/1/2013 6:01:56 AM |
Va chat closed due to lack of quality posters :( |
|
mellotron47
Chesapeake, VA
53, joined Apr. 2012
|
|
| 2/1/2013 8:17:23 AM |
Va chat closed due to lack of quality posters :( |
|
vaegood
Harrisonburg, VA
56, joined May. 2007
|
Do we get tarter sauce with that gurnz?
|
| 2/1/2013 9:39:21 AM |
Va chat closed due to lack of quality posters :( |
|
hamlin11
Radford, VA
45, joined Dec. 2007
|
meow
Now that's my kinda p*ssy @ green 
|
| 2/1/2013 9:40:58 AM |
Va chat closed due to lack of quality posters :( |
|
hamlin11
Radford, VA
45, joined Dec. 2007
|
I was ......just cheating on VA with 40s chat .....I'm such a player
|
| 2/1/2013 1:54:42 PM |
Va chat closed due to lack of quality posters :( |
|
vipir35
Courtland, VA
56, joined Sep. 2011
|
just filed mine ... I got a great break this year ... $2855 back...
|
| 2/1/2013 4:33:05 PM |
Va chat closed due to lack of quality posters :( |
|
snooty__muffin
Woodbridge, VA
46, joined Jan. 2013
|
|
| 2/1/2013 5:28:21 PM |
Va chat closed due to lack of quality posters :( |
|
vaegood
Harrisonburg, VA
56, joined May. 2007
|
muffy I hope all is well
|
| 2/2/2013 6:16:51 AM |
Va chat closed due to lack of quality posters :( |
|
mellotron47
Chesapeake, VA
53, joined Apr. 2012
|
Wonder when the forms will be ready...hopefully not April 14th...
|
| 2/3/2013 8:19:12 AM |
Va chat closed due to lack of quality posters :( |
|
greenidlady34
Mechanicsville, VA
46, joined Jan. 2013
|
that makes my head hurt! LMAO
|
| 2/3/2013 8:53:19 AM |
Va chat closed due to lack of quality posters :( |
|
vaegood
Harrisonburg, VA
56, joined May. 2007
|
I thought your head already hurt from friday night
|
| 2/3/2013 9:35:31 AM |
Va chat closed due to lack of quality posters :( |
|
vaegood
Harrisonburg, VA
56, joined May. 2007
|
"About Football Teams..."
Ohio State's Urban Meyer on one of his players:
"He doesn't know the meaning of the word fear.
In fact, I just saw his grades and he doesn't know
the meaning of a lot of words."
Why do Tennessee fans wear orange?
So they can dress that way for the game on
Saturday, go hunting on Sunday, and pick up
trash on Monday.
What does the average Alabama player get on his
SATs?
Drool.
How many Michigan freshmen football players does it
take to change a light bulb?
None. That's a sophomore course.
How did the Georgia football player die from
drinking milk?
The cow fell on him.
Two West Virginia football players were walking in
the woods. One of them said, "Look, a dead bird."
The other looked up in the sky and said, "Where?"
A Texas Longhorn football player was almost killed
yesterday in a tragic horseback-riding accident. He
fell from a horse and was nearly trampled to death.
Luckily, the manager of the Walmart* came out
and unplugged the horse.
What do you say to a University of Miami Hurricane
football player dressed in a three-piece suit?"
"Will the defendant please rise."
If three Florida State football players are in the
same car, who is driving?
The police officer.
How can you tell if an Auburn football player
has a girlfriend?
There's tobacco juice on both sides of the pickup
truck.
What do you get when you put 32 Arkansas
cheerleaders in one room?
A full set of teeth.
University of Michigan Coach Brady Hoke is only
going to dress half of his players for the game
this week; the other half will have to dress
themselves.
How is the Indiana football team like an opossum?
They play dead at home and get killed on the road.
Why did the Nebraska linebacker steal a police car?
He saw "911" on the side and thought it was a Porsche.
How do you get a former Illinois football player off
your porch?
Pay him for the pizza.
What are the longest three years of a University of
Kentucky football player's life?
Freshman I, Freshman II, and Freshman III.
|
| 2/3/2013 9:39:30 AM |
Va chat closed due to lack of quality posters :( |
|
greenidlady34
Mechanicsville, VA
46, joined Jan. 2013
|
I thought your head already hurt from friday night
makes it worse!
|
| 2/3/2013 6:57:12 PM |
Va chat closed due to lack of quality posters :( |
|
vaegood
Harrisonburg, VA
56, joined May. 2007
|
can i still pray for a cow gurnz?
|
| 2/3/2013 7:43:25 PM |
Va chat closed due to lack of quality posters :( |
|
vaegood
Harrisonburg, VA
56, joined May. 2007
|
so that's why it is called ground beef uh?
hamburgers and steaks are good you know
|
| 2/3/2013 7:52:11 PM |
Va chat closed due to lack of quality posters :( |
|
vaegood
Harrisonburg, VA
56, joined May. 2007
|
 I'll take a flying cow if it drops in sometime
|
| 2/4/2013 6:35:41 AM |
Va chat closed due to lack of quality posters :( |
|
vaegood
Harrisonburg, VA
56, joined May. 2007
|
and I thought bird droppings on the car were bad and why in tarnations does Santa use reindeer if he could use cows?
|
| 2/5/2013 6:57:57 AM |
Va chat closed due to lack of quality posters :( |
|
vaegood
Harrisonburg, VA
56, joined May. 2007
|
"Why I won't be Coming to Work Today"
1. If it is all the same to you, I won't be coming
in to work. The voices told me to clean all my
guns today.
2. When I got up this morning I took two Ex-Lax
in addition to my Prozac. I can't get off the john,
but I feel happy about it.
3. I set half the clocks in my house ahead an hour
and the other half back an hour Saturday and spent
18 hours in some kind of space-time continuum loop,
reliving Sunday (right up until the explosion). I was
able to exit the loop only by reversing the polarity of
the power source of exactly e*log(pi) clocks in the
house while simultaneously rapping my dog on the
snout with a rolled up Times. Accordingly, I will be in
late, or early.
4. My stigmata's acting up.
5. I can't come in to work today because I'll be stalking
my previous boss, who fired me for not showing up for
work. OK?
6. I have a rare case of 48-hour projectile leprosy, but
I know we have that deadline to meet...
7. I am stuck in the blood pressure machine down at
the Food Giant.
8. Yes, I seem to have contracted some attention-
deficit disorder and, hey, how about them 49ers,
huh? So, I won't be able to, yes, could I help you?
No, no, I'll be sticking with Sprint, but thank you for
calling.
9. Constipation has made me a walking time bomb.
10. I just found out that I was switched at birth.
Legally, I shouldn't come to work knowing my
employee records may now contain false information.
11. The psychiatrist said it was an excellent session.
He even gave me this jaw restraint so I won't bite
things when I am startled.
12. The dog ate my car keys. We're going to hitchhike
to the vet.
13. I prefer to remain an enigma.
14. My mother-in-law has come back as one of
the Undead, and we must track her to her coffin
to drive a stake through her heart and give her
eternal peace. One day should do it.
15. I can't come to work today because the EPA
has determined that my house is completely
surrounded by wetlands and I have to arrange
for helicopter transportation.
16. I am converting my calendar from Julian to
Gregorian.
17. I am extremely sensitive to a rise in the interest
rates.
18. I refuse to travel to my job in the District until
there is a commuter tax. I insist on paying my fair
share.
|
| 2/5/2013 9:18:22 AM |
Va chat closed due to lack of quality posters :( |
|
vaegood
Harrisonburg, VA
56, joined May. 2007
|
sorry hamster He wanted posters I think
|
| 2/5/2013 2:52:50 PM |
Va chat closed due to lack of quality posters :( |
|
vaegood
Harrisonburg, VA
56, joined May. 2007
|
a hijacker anyway very few of lifes personal problems can not be cured with the proper placement of high explosives
|
| 2/5/2013 5:47:21 PM |
Va chat closed due to lack of quality posters :( |
|
vaegood
Harrisonburg, VA
56, joined May. 2007
|
|
| 2/5/2013 5:53:55 PM |
Va chat closed due to lack of quality posters :( |
|
vaegood
Harrisonburg, VA
56, joined May. 2007
|
hamster is excused He has been working a lot lately
|