| 5/22/2014 6:10:00 PM |
Is she apathetic? Busy? What? |
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wehitawall
Broomfield, CO
23, joined Apr. 2014
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I need to vent. I have been feeling awful. I'll try and sum it up fast.
I met this girl a few days ago, and I was beginning to think she was "the one". She had a lot of traits that I liked, very confident, kind, caring and didn't play games. Both of us were beginning to feel a real connection, then she wanted to text me.
I didn't see harm in it, if anything it would be helpful for communication, but normally I prefer real phone calls. Texts are nice if such communication isn't possible. We were hitting it off, then silence. I didn't say anything to upset her. She told me she fell asleep because she had a rough day at work, and I can understand that since I work 10 hr shifts normally. We spoke more after that,which in itself still wasn't very long, but then silence again. Hours and hours, then nothing almost going for two days. Last night I asked if we could have a phone call because just texting does nothing for me. Nothing. Then on my break I wanted to check up on her so I told her "I'm on my break, I wanted to check up on you before I head back. Are you feeling ok?" haven't heard from her.
I told her early on that I couldn't tolerate apathy, since a lot of my girlfriends have been that way. She told me she wasn't. She wants to see me again in a couple weeks, since she's free then, but I thought communicating till then would help keep interest at the very least.
It's making me feel like burnt toast, and I want to give it a couple days before I try anything then just leave. This much trouble isn't worth it to me, and I'm afraid I'll get a stomach ulcer. I can see she reads my messages, and I really don't want to bombard her or seem like a creep.
Any advice? I think she's not in the right mind, but deep down I want to give it a chance because I like her. 
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| 5/22/2014 6:18:28 PM |
Is she apathetic? Busy? What? |
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jess_is_back
Jefferson City, MO
30, joined Mar. 2013
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No answer is an answer..
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| 5/22/2014 6:21:37 PM |
Is she apathetic? Busy? What? |
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wehitawall
Broomfield, CO
23, joined Apr. 2014
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Right? I should have just taken that as is, but I'm stupid and need some things spelled out for me.
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| 5/22/2014 6:41:41 PM |
Is she apathetic? Busy? What? |
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ayemie
Granite Bay, CA
46, joined Jul. 2010
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She is free in a couple of weeks to see you?!?
People who are interested and want to see you make the time and effort to do so.
My guess is you're her backup plan incase the guy she is really interested in doesn't work out. Just my opinion though.
[Edited 5/22/2014 6:43:04 PM ]
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| 5/22/2014 6:44:04 PM |
Is she apathetic? Busy? What? |
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wehitawall
Broomfield, CO
23, joined Apr. 2014
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Also what I was thinking. Glad I wasn't alone on that idea.
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| 5/22/2014 6:48:59 PM |
Is she apathetic? Busy? What? |
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4uijack
New Port Richey, FL
82, joined Aug. 2013
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Do you swallow, OPie??
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| 5/22/2014 6:51:51 PM |
Is she apathetic? Busy? What? |
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starr_n_love
Chicago, IL
33, joined Mar. 2014
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I met this girl a few days ago, and I was beginning to think she was "the one".
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
That is why she ran.....smart woman. ..few days and she's the one..?
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| 5/22/2014 7:00:22 PM |
Is she apathetic? Busy? What? |
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wehitawall
Broomfield, CO
23, joined Apr. 2014
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I probably should of wrote, "the possibility of being 'the one'" or something to that effect. I didn't mean to sound delusional. I'm not one to hop into things, but you can't help but think of the future sometimes.
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| 5/22/2014 7:09:10 PM |
Is she apathetic? Busy? What? |
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zombietrouble7
Knoxville, TN
51, joined Apr. 2014
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Someone said in another thread that
a woman will walk on broken glass to spend time with a man she's truly interested in,no matter how busy her life is.
If she's too busy for you,she's not really interested.Don't be a sap.Move on.
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| 5/22/2014 7:22:44 PM |
Is she apathetic? Busy? What? |
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hoople65
Jacksonville, FL
52, joined Oct. 2011
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She correctly diagnosed you as a stage 1 clinger running headlong into stage 6 stalker and nipped it in the bud.
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| 5/22/2014 7:31:23 PM |
Is she apathetic? Busy? What? |
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mysticalsag9
Clarksburg, WV
60, joined Jan. 2013
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I would agree with if she really
liked you.... she would not mind all the texts u send to her ... I would say one last text are we still meeting ? see what she says ? if she said yes then also tell her to text you when she has the free time ... if she says no ...you got your answer ...
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| 5/22/2014 7:32:29 PM |
Is she apathetic? Busy? What? |
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reader85037
Phoenix, AZ
42, joined Apr. 2014
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I need to vent. I have been feeling awful.
Wow.
I had no idea we had that close of a relationship, where you felt you could come to me any time and ejaculate your emotional problems onto my senses, believing I, or anyone, would give a shit.
...Thank you for the honor.
Does this mean you will lend me money?
Other than that
Any advice?
Grow a f**king spine and balls.
Don't be her girlfriend and just call to chat, don't call "just to say hi" or "wanted to check up on you."
Call with a damn purpose.
Ask her out on a date. Have specifics. Have an idea. Have a purpose.
If you act like her girlfriend all you are going to be doing is placing yourself in the pecking order of all her other girlfriends.
...You aren't going to finish high on that priority list as someone new.
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| 5/22/2014 7:47:19 PM |
Is she apathetic? Busy? What? |
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jaleman213
Los Angeles, CA
25, joined Mar. 2014
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Don't rush it, bro.
Relationships are time.
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| 5/22/2014 7:48:19 PM |
Is she apathetic? Busy? What? |
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lookin4him2012
Boone, NC
49, joined Jan. 2012
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She is free in a couple of weeks to see you?!?
People who are interested and want to see you make the time and effort to do so.
My guess is you're her backup plan incase the guy she is really interested in doesn't work out. Just my opinion though.
I agree.
OP the girl isn't in to you and she is just being nice to you at this point probably hoping you will be the one to break it off so she doesn't have to 'feel bad' for being mean to you and telling you to leave her alone. Start ignoring her and you will find out what she wants. 
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| 5/22/2014 8:07:12 PM |
Is she apathetic? Busy? What? |
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wehitawall
Broomfield, CO
23, joined Apr. 2014
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It's funny, I DO have a spine, but every time I feel I need to be indirect in some way because I listened too much into "girls like the nice guys". Oh, well. Once I start a bond fire and ride a harley I'll get my balls back. Better yet, I should find a balance because I lean toward nice too much when I should be direct.
I was planning on ignoring her and seeing if she lets herself be known. And if not, I really didn't lose anything to begin with.
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| 5/22/2014 8:13:21 PM |
Is she apathetic? Busy? What? |
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iheartidiots
Grove City, OH
40, joined Feb. 2012
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Don't bother. The right woman will be there. She's the wrong one.
But don't get caught up so much in the idea of love. Your heart and pride will break faster.
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| 5/22/2014 8:15:45 PM |
Is she apathetic? Busy? What? |
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josfsd06
Sioux Falls, SD
58, joined Mar. 2014
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Well, Opie, here's the hard truth. "After a few days" she decided you weren't "the one".
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| 5/22/2014 11:33:18 PM |
Is she apathetic? Busy? What? |
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danicalifornia2
Northridge, CA
37, joined Jan. 2013
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She's just not into you.......
Sorry.
Move on.......
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| 5/22/2014 11:42:38 PM |
Is she apathetic? Busy? What? |
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whitl42
Beaver Dam, KY
46, joined Feb. 2014
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Don't spend another minute worry about her..
You didn't do a damn thing wrong!
And hey! I like it if a guy sends me a random text just checking on me.. Let's me know that I crossed his mind...
If you was into you.. She wouldn't leave you hanging.. 
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| 5/23/2014 12:03:39 AM |
Is she apathetic? Busy? What? |
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chris_90352
Sykesville, MD
44, joined Sep. 2010
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No answer is an answer..
Don't rush it, bro.
Relationships are time.
That, and that: no answer is an answer (and that answer is "not interested"), and relationships take time, effort, and even with time and effort there are no guarantees.
It's funny, I DO have a spine, but every time I feel I need to be indirect in some way because I listened too much into "girls like the nice guys". Oh, well. Once I start a bond fire and ride a harley I'll get my balls back. Better yet, I should find a balance because I lean toward nice too much when I should be direct. ...
1. Avoid girls. Date women.
2. Women like normal men... "Nice Guys" and "Bad Boys" are not especially normal, and the forums are full of both self-proclaimed "Nice Guys" and total jerks complaining endlessly about how little attention they get.
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| 5/23/2014 12:23:49 AM |
Is she apathetic? Busy? What? |
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naturebiy
Bangkok
Thailand
41, joined Jul. 2011
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I would say find something to keep you occupied for a few weeks... very simple.
You will be sitting there playing Call Of Duty, and out of the blue, you will get that text message...
Taking that you have not acted needy...
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| 5/23/2014 12:38:09 AM |
Is she apathetic? Busy? What? |
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american_ghost
Chicago, IL
92, joined May. 2014
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dont overanalyze it bro.
NOT that i didnt, and not that i still dont!
but...just let her go. she's pulling away for some reason.
she may not want to tell you why, for one reason or another.
Trust your instincts ALWAYS remember that simple rule.
Your instincts are telling you "something's wrong."
Im not trying to talk depressing but this is just another fact of life.
she may have NOT felt the same you do. it's hard to say.
and it doesn't matter. let her go. and no you dont have to even tell her, or discuss it with her. just let her go and move on. YOU ARE YOUNG.
and people lie and cheat horribly.
when somebody pushes you away, TAKE THE HINT!
it's better than being lead on for years and years and dollars and dollars.
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| 5/23/2014 12:52:44 AM |
Is she apathetic? Busy? What? |
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browneyz
San Diego, CA
98, joined Jan. 2008
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Make your life your priority,get busy,explore,plan a vacation with guy friends. plenty of time for girls,trust me,there will be many
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| 5/23/2014 1:16:05 AM |
Is she apathetic? Busy? What? |
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pickygirl72
Pinon Hills, CA
46, joined Sep. 2011
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I am still waiting for the short version...
Just kidding OP. Hey if she liked you she'd be communicating with you by phone and or texting you on a daily basis. And soon a meet n greet would happen. Sounds like she is just stringing you along (playing games). I'd throw in the towel and move on. If she contacts you out of the blue with her excuses, just say you are not interested in her anymore.
I hate it when you think u have a connection and it just doesn't work out...that's sucks.
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| 5/23/2014 1:18:14 AM |
Is she apathetic? Busy? What? |
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mortara
Pittsburgh, PA
63, joined Feb. 2014
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That why you kinda need other girlfriends. Think of it!!! You got two whole weeks spending time with them until she gets back to you.
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| 5/23/2014 2:04:30 AM |
Is she apathetic? Busy? What? |
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tbrowneyesgirl
Oceanside, CA
56, joined Mar. 2014
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Cut it loose.She isn't really feeling you the way you are feeling her.
Other fish in the sea, so cast your line and hook another one.Learn from this and don't waste your time, next go around.
Good luck.
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| 5/23/2014 6:13:32 AM |
Is she apathetic? Busy? What? |
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cabanaariefedd
Norcross, GA
28, joined Dec. 2012
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Damn you just wrote a novel didn't you.
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| 5/23/2014 11:17:52 AM |
Is she apathetic? Busy? What? |
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dad3county5
Hialeah, FL
28, joined Jun. 2013
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She's just being nice to you, she's not interested.
1) You should have called her regardless
2) Asking made you seem less confident in her eyes, her natural response was to not respond at all.
3) Its ok to be busy and take some time to meet. However no girl really interested in you is gonna pass up the opportunity to see you.
Move on to better things man
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| 5/23/2014 3:47:42 PM |
Is she apathetic? Busy? What? |
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ladybugruth58
Patton, PA
58, joined Feb. 2014
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I know I forget to call back. I also work and have an extremely busy life. But I communicate that. I never mind a call. I will let him know why I can't talk. I give him the same respect. However if I am truly not interested I will tell him that. I hate hurting anyone but I think it is unfair to string anyone along.
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| 5/23/2014 4:07:22 PM |
Is she apathetic? Busy? What? |
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ladybugruth58
Patton, PA
58, joined Feb. 2014
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Just got a call my friend isn't coming in from out of town he broke his foot. The other guys are happy.lol.
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| 5/23/2014 4:19:11 PM |
Is she apathetic? Busy? What? |
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lovetodoit
Buffalo, MO
61, joined Sep. 2011
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Meet up with her in two weeks tap that a** and move along
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| 5/23/2014 5:04:21 PM |
Is she apathetic? Busy? What? |
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iamblithe
Carlsbad, CA
46, joined May. 2013
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I was only a few days and obviously you felt more that she did.
Let it go.
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| 5/24/2014 6:37:29 AM |
Is she apathetic? Busy? What? |
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ambitiouswoman3
Albany, NY
28, joined Nov. 2012
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OP: Move forward and brush your shoulder off. Anyone that's truly interested in hanging out with you will make an effort. Life's too short to fall prey to people's games.
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| 5/24/2014 6:54:31 AM |
Is she apathetic? Busy? What? |
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lucky_1million
Pewaukee, WI
50, joined Jun. 2013
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IDK....
I never pay too much attention to who calls when or how many times a person texts me. The only thing I consider is if I had a nice date with this person. Does this person appear to like me when we are together? Do I like this person? Do we have fun together?
Sometimes people can over think things. However, if someone doesn't return any of my calls and is always busy... well... I would leave the ball in his court.
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| 5/24/2014 7:12:39 AM |
Is she apathetic? Busy? What? |
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mylegsarecold
Gainesville, FL
55, joined May. 2011
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I once met a bipolar woman and thought she was the two.
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| 5/24/2014 7:19:11 AM |
Is she apathetic? Busy? What? |
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safeamerica
Lexington, KY
52, joined Dec. 2013
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Sounds like the person was not being totally honest with you,and is not taking your relationship serious in any manner.I would move on,keep looking.Even if she starts communicating regular in time...not to take it to seriously until you know more of the person,and she is who,she says,she is etc...women walk feet forward,men walk feet out ward..etc..........
she also just might have wanted and enjoyed the conversation,and is not ready for a serious relationship yet,but she should be totally honest with you.When things are stated,and then actions do not prove statements to be true.Is time to watch out,be careful of scam or not good person etc...
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| 5/24/2014 11:25:58 AM |
Is she apathetic? Busy? What? |
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monkeydid
Thomaston, GA
35, joined Dec. 2013
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She correctly diagnosed you as a stage 1 clinger running headlong into stage 6 stalker and nipped it in the bud.
I am inclined to agree. If you are stressing out this bad about a girl you don't even know, you should re-evaluate your approach... And also your emotions. Whether YOU think you came off as clingy or not, I'm pretty sure SHE thought you were. Girls can tell, and it makes us uncomfortable. Even if she thought you were a wonderful person, she probably freaked out about you "checking up" on her.
As for waiting a couple of weeks to see you, she may really want to give it a chance. And she may really be busy. Give her some space and see how it goes. I live in the middle of nowhere and I work almost every day. When I get home, I don't always want to talk to someone. And, depending on my schedule and how far I have to drive, it may be a couple of weeks before I can meet someone - no matter how much I like them. As for walking on broken glass for someone you care about, I would only do that for someone I knew very well. That is love, which can only develop over time.
If you don't learn to chill out and accept things as they are, you are going to get hurt a lot in this life.
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| 5/24/2014 12:16:09 PM |
Is she apathetic? Busy? What? |
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dances_in_woods
Henderson, TX
50, joined Mar. 2011
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Lets face it we are all 'busy' nowdays but how long does it take to send at least a txt msg back?...30 seconds to 1 minute? She's gaming ya & if & when she does decide to finally 'find' the time to txt then I'd give her a dose of her own medicine, I find they usually don't like the taste of returning the favor to them 
jmo
[Edited 5/24/2014 12:17:47 PM ]
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| 5/24/2014 9:51:15 PM |
Is she apathetic? Busy? What? |
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sweetmama117
Bronx, NY
57, joined Aug. 2013
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Make your life your priority,get busy,explore,plan a vacation with guy friends. plenty of time for girls,trust me,there will be many
^^^that^^^ OP you're two young to be waiting on a chick that you met a few days.
People are replaceable if she's to busy for you so move on. Find someone who
wants to hang out with you. It's to soon for that BS. And be careful of the
scammers on here.
Good luck and be wise with who you communicate with on dating sites.
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