11/7/2014 5:23:01 PM |
Trust again or Maybe not |
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mrsdee0783
Westminster, CA
34, joined Sep. 2014
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Hello,
I am a single mom of 3 lovely babies. My thing with dating is learning to trust again. Why is it so difficult to trust? I believe that's what stops me from exclusive dating I have 0% trust, how do I learn to trust again??????
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11/8/2014 12:17:03 PM |
Trust again or Maybe not |
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good_dr
Spokane, WA
53, joined Dec. 2011
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Hello,
I am a single mom of 3 lovely babies. My thing with dating is learning to trust again. Why is it so difficult to trust? I believe that's what stops me from exclusive dating I have 0% trust, how do I learn to trust again??????
Being a single parent myself from the other side of the fence. This question can go in both directions. Once trust have been given and broken so many times. It's not easy, and at times can be just down right scary. Trust than becomes something that is earned. If dates are not willing to spend the quality time. Soon dating becomes a bore. Sure could go out to a bar, but on second thoughts. I don't have time for those games. Specially considering that I don't drink. Right now the most important are the children. It's not easy to become exclusive if the date doesn't take children into consideration. If they can't understand that they will have there time later. Next.
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11/9/2014 10:49:35 AM |
Trust again or Maybe not |
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packersbabe920
Green Bay, WI
52, joined Jul. 2013
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@dee, it starts within yourself
and by u admitted it, is
a start just remember, everybody
not out to get u..good luck
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11/10/2014 6:32:57 AM |
Trust again or Maybe not |
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agooddaddy10
Liberty, KY
53, joined Aug. 2010
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Many of us can look back now at the obvious signs and think "what an idiot, I'll never be blind to that again".
So we go through a phase of putting prospects under our microscope to find flaws, we run at the first sign of one-or what we see as a flaw.
Then we say "dang, too picky, I need to chill and relax and see where the flow takes me". We compromise our standards.
It blows up.
Lather, rinse, repeat.
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11/19/2014 5:57:11 PM |
Trust again or Maybe not |
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freckleyez
Perrysburg, OH
36, joined Oct. 2014
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Trust is such a precious thing. I want so badly to be able to trust a man again. It's very hard not to bring experiences from previous relationships into the new one. I allowed my ex (I say allow because it was MY choice to put up with it) to walk all over me. I allowed him to disrespect me in such a way I believed every word he said about me. I allowed him to tell me I wasn't good enough (maybe not in those exact words) day after day, I chose to stay after I found out he cheated on me the first time (I was 2 months pregnant at the time). I let him talk his way out situation. Then to find our that he cheated on me at least 4 different times (one with someone who was supposed to be my best friend) I'm sure there were more.
I stated all of this because I really don't know how I will be able to trust the next guy that comes along. Shoot I I've talked to a couple of guys on here and I don't know if I believe them. But I know that I want to. I know that there is a man (at least I want to believe there is a man) out there that will respect me and treat me so unbelievably good. Because I deserve that. Will the trust come easy, probably not, but I will give it my all to not let my past dictate my future.
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11/19/2014 11:25:53 PM |
Trust again or Maybe not |
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mboots31
Albion, NE
35, joined Jun. 2014
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When desire is more than your fears then you can learn how to trust again. Figure out what you truly desire as a person to be with.
I look back at when I was dating and think of my past marriage. There is only one difference one lasted longer than the other and of course I had kids during my marriage but that could of happened at anytime.
It's all a learning curve and a chance to find what you really want. I've been told over and over the right person will find you when your not looking.
Only time will tell. Until then I am only worried about my kids not hunting for the ultimate relationship. If your always hunting and trying it seems like your always disappointed and depressed because what made you anxious is more of a let down.
I'd say down put your guard down but don't put it up all the way never know what saying hi might lead too.
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11/19/2014 11:26:45 PM |
Trust again or Maybe not |
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legaleye
Columbus, OH
65, joined Mar. 2008
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I always looked at people this way. I trust them in general (no, not turning over the credit cards or the house keys) until I have a reason to not trust someone. If I go out with someone and she is nice, and we have a good time going out, and I am not getting any strange vibes (the ones that lead me to believe she is married, for example, on a later date dont take me to my house, drop me down the block.... that one is obvious) or blatant inconsistencies.
Way too many people attribute everything that anyone has done to them to the next person they meet, so they will never find success in relationships.
But a question.... do you really have the time and energy to be in an exclusive dating relationship? I like a lot of face to face time, and I have found that way too many women want to date when convenient for them (men do that to but I dont date men), and think it is all a one way street in their favor. Their loss.
Your mileage may vary.
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1/7/2015 12:27:43 PM |
Trust again or Maybe not |
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rose1206
Gilbert, AZ
35, joined Jul. 2012
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There's no easy answer to your question, but time is on your side and is a great healing source. There's some good guys out there, the bigger issue is compatibility though.
[Edited 1/7/2015 12:28:29 PM ]
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1/10/2015 9:38:11 PM |
Trust again or Maybe not |
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cjsassy72
Berthoud, CO
44, joined Sep. 2014
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Its hard to trust a man after my heart's been broken, but I can't move on until I forgive him. It doesn't matter if that's your friend, boyfriend or family who broke your heart you have to learn to forgive that person. I know it's hard but you have to. It don't matter what happened, learn to forgive & move on... for your health & for your children.
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1/11/2015 12:11:45 AM |
Trust again or Maybe not |
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freckleyez
Perrysburg, OH
36, joined Oct. 2014
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Its hard to trust a man after my heart's been broken, but I can't move on until I forgive him. It doesn't matter if that's your friend, boyfriend or family who broke your heart you have to learn to forgive that person. I know it's hard but you have to. It don't matter what happened, learn to forgive & move on... for your health & for your children.
Forgiveness is key!!! I am not there yet. But I know I want to be. I have a lot that I have to forgive. It's still kind fresh so I'm working on it.
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1/11/2015 2:26:40 PM |
Trust again or Maybe not |
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doingme1981
Glendale, AZ
34, joined Dec. 2014
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Can't let one mans action get in the way of your happiness
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1/19/2015 8:15:57 AM |
Trust again or Maybe not |
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oppsiidazi
Orr, MN
47, joined Oct. 2014
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Hello,
I am a single mom of 3 lovely babies. My thing with dating is learning to trust again. Why is it so difficult to trust? I believe that's what stops me from exclusive dating I have 0% trust, how do I learn to trust again??????
Take a time out.
Work on your issues before getting back into serious dating.
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1/20/2015 2:03:29 PM |
Trust again or Maybe not |
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txcountrymedic
Pleasanton, TX
39, joined Mar. 2014
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I am thinking maybe not. Seems to be the safe realistic option.
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1/21/2015 2:59:18 PM |
Trust again or Maybe not |
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treec36
Saint Petersburg, FL
38, joined Oct. 2014
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Trust again and appreciate your mistakes and poor choices
cause they happen to make you wiser and stronger believe
that u got what it takes to be a winner and prosper at everything
you want to do no matter what happens.so lets get back to eden
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1/21/2015 3:01:34 PM |
Trust again or Maybe not |
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treec36
Saint Petersburg, FL
38, joined Oct. 2014
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woo! yes forgiveness is key
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1/22/2015 2:39:39 PM |
Trust again or Maybe not |
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themadhater
San Tan Valley, AZ
38, joined Apr. 2013
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Maybe ..I'm not sure
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1/29/2015 9:00:28 PM |
Trust again or Maybe not |
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cole_tanner
Fort Pierre, SD
35, joined Dec. 2012
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If u carry trust problems with u there's no point in dating cuz even if u meet the right person your going to mess it up and u will have lost and who ever hurt u will have won and Y give them that controle and power over u just by caring that with u
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2/3/2015 11:13:15 AM |
Trust again or Maybe not |
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buxomqt
Springfield, OR
45, joined Apr. 2014
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I'm fearless and always looking for my next heartbreak. Ha!
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