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1/5/2015 1:41:17 PM Is marriage obsolete ?  

mr_bdm
Weirton, WV
48, joined Jul. 2014


is marriage obsolete




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1/5/2015 1:44:23 PM Is marriage obsolete ?  

kawkasian
Over 2,000 Posts (2,737)
Houston, TX
47, joined Sep. 2014


Not as long as you still get the tax breaks.

1/5/2015 1:49:26 PM Is marriage obsolete ?  
chitowngirl78
Over 1,000 Posts (1,706)
Oak Lawn, IL
36, joined May. 2014


Nope, I just think people get married for the wrong reasons.

1/5/2015 1:54:11 PM Is marriage obsolete ?  

mr_bdm
Weirton, WV
48, joined Jul. 2014


Quote from chitowngirl78:
Nope, I just think people get married for the wrong reasons.
can you ellaborate?

1/5/2015 1:58:12 PM Is marriage obsolete ?  

iheartidiots
Over 10,000 Posts!!! (13,473)
Grove City, OH
37, joined Feb. 2012


Quote from kawkasian:
Not as long as you still get the tax breaks.

One good thing about marriage.

1/5/2015 1:59:06 PM Is marriage obsolete ?  

mr_1234m
Over 4,000 Posts! (6,123)
Louisville, KY
39, joined Apr. 2014


Yes.


No.


Maybe.

1/5/2015 2:01:08 PM Is marriage obsolete ?  

riflessivo
Over 10,000 Posts!!! (14,316)
AlmafuerteStaffordshire
United Kingdom
40, joined Jan. 2014


No to me it isn't.

1/5/2015 3:06:17 PM Is marriage obsolete ?  

dezweather
Phoenix, AZ
53, joined Oct. 2014


Quote from kawkasian:
Not as long as you still get the tax breaks.



Very true!

1/5/2015 3:20:30 PM Is marriage obsolete ?  

boyinneed
Over 1,000 Posts (1,199)
Miami, FL
50, joined Aug. 2011


Not in divorce court...

1/5/2015 4:11:01 PM Is marriage obsolete ?  
rose1206
Over 2,000 Posts (2,418)
Gilbert, AZ
33, joined Jul. 2012


Not even close, where I live has a very high marriage rate.

1/5/2015 4:39:10 PM Is marriage obsolete ?  

packersbabe920
Over 10,000 Posts!!! (14,976)
Green Bay, WI
49, joined Jul. 2013


No

1/5/2015 4:48:05 PM Is marriage obsolete ?  

alphaman81
Springfield, MA
35, joined Dec. 2014


yes def 50% end in divorce, people do it for financial gains, tax breaks, or because they feel it's the thing to do, till death do u part a promise to god but only half the time.

1/5/2015 4:53:22 PM Is marriage obsolete ?  

riflessivo
Over 10,000 Posts!!! (14,316)
AlmafuerteStaffordshire
United Kingdom
40, joined Jan. 2014


Marriage I've found is obsolete with people who have lost faith in what it means.

Either by personal loss from it or seeing just people who have had experiences.

Marriage is usually only bad if you marry the wrong person.

1/5/2015 5:13:37 PM Is marriage obsolete ?  

alphaman81
Springfield, MA
35, joined Dec. 2014


Quote from riflessivo:
Marriage I've found is obsolete with people who have lost faith in what it means.

Either by personal loss from it or seeing just people who have had experiences.

Marriage is usually only bad if you marry the wrong person.


I've never been married but I agree

1/5/2015 5:21:03 PM Is marriage obsolete ?  

riflessivo
Over 10,000 Posts!!! (14,316)
AlmafuerteStaffordshire
United Kingdom
40, joined Jan. 2014


I've been married. But I recognise it was both our faults why it failed.

I learned from it. I think if you recently got divorced or another person deceived or cheated then I can understand why people feel it's obsolete. It lost it's meaning.

I just married too young. To the wrong person. So maybe that's why I see it differently?

1/5/2015 5:23:17 PM Is marriage obsolete ?  

freckleyez
Perrysburg, OH
34, joined Oct. 2014


Marriage is only obsolete if we make it that way. Just because my marriage didn't work out doesn't mean I give up on the institution of it.. I'm looking forward to getting married again in the future with the right person.

1/5/2015 5:27:32 PM Is marriage obsolete ?  

alphaman81
Springfield, MA
35, joined Dec. 2014


I came close but glad I didn't, not to knock it the true ideal behind it is amazing, I've just never seen one work

1/5/2015 5:30:34 PM Is marriage obsolete ?  

riflessivo
Over 10,000 Posts!!! (14,316)
AlmafuerteStaffordshire
United Kingdom
40, joined Jan. 2014


I have, my parents in their 43rd year

1/5/2015 5:31:44 PM Is marriage obsolete ?  

alphaman81
Springfield, MA
35, joined Dec. 2014


wow god bless em

1/5/2015 5:38:07 PM Is marriage obsolete ?  

riflessivo
Over 10,000 Posts!!! (14,316)
AlmafuerteStaffordshire
United Kingdom
40, joined Jan. 2014


Yeah they are each others best friend. People have come and gone and they still back each other 100%

Funny when I was younger my mum used to wait all day for my dad to come home. She'd make his dinner and then he'd read the newspaper and fall asleep. She waited all day for that.

Now my dad makes dinner as he's semi retired and my mum comes home, eats dinner and falls asleep lol

But they love each other.

1/5/2015 7:40:50 PM Is marriage obsolete ?  
driver406
Over 10,000 Posts!!! (37,205)
Saint Paul, MN
62, joined Oct. 2009


The 50s style marriage is. Women want nothing to do with their own femininity unless they can use it to get their way.

1/6/2015 6:21:21 AM Is marriage obsolete ?  

testsignup
Over 2,000 Posts (3,327)
Springfield, VA
61, joined Sep. 2009


Marriage as a sort of "magic spell" has been obsolete since the day it was invented. Holding a ceremony and chanting, and getting the local police to enforce your promises for you, has never worked as designed.

Marriage as a true commitment and way of living and loving, has always worked.

1/6/2015 6:22:05 AM Is marriage obsolete ?  

vagmasterflash
Over 1,000 Posts (1,416)
Durand, WI
49, joined Nov. 2014
online now!


I don't know. Never been married. Don't think it's gonna happen. I've heard too many horror stories.

1/6/2015 6:33:48 AM Is marriage obsolete ?  

1_2manyfrogs
Over 2,000 Posts (3,192)
Pinon Hills, CA
50, joined Apr. 2012


I hope not.

I still believe in it.

My Grandparents were married almost 80 years, and they were very happy.

I don't think a lot of young people think of love the way many of us older folks do. I see em posting on here all the time looking for an extra partner for them to share.

1/6/2015 8:43:47 AM Is marriage obsolete ?  

bumblebee7
Over 10,000 Posts!!! (43,230)
Fort Payne, AL
59, joined Apr. 2011


It is for those who oppose it.

and then not the rest.


Sure, I read enough on this site who oppose it....yet still see plenty of marriages out in the real world.

When Kay Jewelry Stops running its ads, then we'll know there is really a problem.

1/6/2015 8:46:50 AM Is marriage obsolete ?  

bumblebee7
Over 10,000 Posts!!! (43,230)
Fort Payne, AL
59, joined Apr. 2011


Quote from 1_2manyfrogs:
I hope not.

I still believe in it.

My Grandparents were married almost 80 years, and they were very happy.

I don't think a lot of young people think of love the way many of us older folks do. I see em posting on here all the time looking for an extra partner for them to share.


True, but our grandparents came from a totally different era and mindset about life, the genders, and marriage.

If they were raised in this era...they wouldn't have been the persons they were that had a marriage last that long.

And look at how your granny treated him and the role she played....and etc.

Women oppose that mindset these days.

So...............................???

1/6/2015 9:30:02 AM Is marriage obsolete ?  

allseeme2
Manassas, VA
64, joined Feb. 2014


Quote from riflessivo:
I have, my parents in their 43rd year


That's great!! I believe in marriage and what it stands for,i was married for 35 years,untill he passed,raised 4 daughters..Yes you hear stories of bad or good marriage,it depends what you both put into it.

For the ones that hasn't been married,dont go by what other marriage end up.,you just haven't found the right one yet.

But obsolete!! that's for you to decide !!

1/6/2015 9:51:35 AM Is marriage obsolete ?  

forsyth4
Fort Payne, AL
28, joined Nov. 2014


(this post has been flagged as inappropriate, sorry.)

1/6/2015 10:03:10 AM Is marriage obsolete ?  
artist820
Over 2,000 Posts (3,282)
Tehachapi, CA
58, joined Jan. 2013


Quote from allseeme2:
That's great!! I believe in marriage and what it stands for,i was married for 35 years,untill he passed,raised 4 daughters..Yes you hear stories of bad or good marriage,it depends what you both put into it.

For the ones that hasn't been married,dont go by what other marriage end up.,you just haven't found the right one yet.

But obsolete!! that's for you to decide !!
congratulations! So, sad he passed away. Wow! if I make it to 5 years, that would be a success. What does it take to make it work. Geez! I'm worn out. I've noticed that "birth order" doesn't help. I'm the oldest daughter in my family. I whipped my younger brothers into shape so that their wives adore them. You're welcome. He is the "baby" of the family. I have to deal with the stuff his older sister should have taught him: don't stand with your hands on your hips, when someone short is trying to pass by, cover your mouth when you yawn, and quit making yawning noise. Who makes noise when they yawn? It's a silent yawn for 90% of Americans. yes, something stupid and I've asked politely over and over again, but I hate to nag. It's better to ignore till I

1/6/2015 11:49:41 AM Is marriage obsolete ?  

dirtdevilone
Edison, NJ
61, joined Feb. 2012


marriage sucks

1/6/2015 11:58:54 AM Is marriage obsolete ?  

riflessivo
Over 10,000 Posts!!! (14,316)
AlmafuerteStaffordshire
United Kingdom
40, joined Jan. 2014


Nah it doesn't when you see the value of it

1/6/2015 2:22:31 PM Is marriage obsolete ?  

1_2manyfrogs
Over 2,000 Posts (3,192)
Pinon Hills, CA
50, joined Apr. 2012


Quote from bumblebee7:
True, but our grandparents came from a totally different era and mindset about life, the genders, and marriage.

If they were raised in this era...they wouldn't have been the persons they were that had a marriage last that long.

And look at how your granny treated him and the role she played....and etc.

Women oppose that mindset these days.

So...............................???


My grandparents raised me. So I saw what they had and I would love to have that kind of marriage. She was HAPPY and so was he. She'd get up and make him a hot breakfast before he went off to work. Dinner was always ready when he got home. The house was immaculate. Laundry was hung on the line to dry and then ironed and put away. There was always work to be done and a schedule to keep. It was a really nice way to grow up.

Sadly, the world is not like that any more. Too bad.

1/6/2015 3:50:37 PM Is marriage obsolete ?  

allseeme2
Manassas, VA
64, joined Feb. 2014


Quote from artist820:
congratulations! So, sad he passed away. Wow! if I make it to 5 years, that would be a success. What does it take to make it work. Geez! I'm worn out. I've noticed that "birth order" doesn't help. I'm the oldest daughter in my family. I whipped my younger brothers into shape so that their wives adore them. You're welcome. He is the "baby" of the family. I have to deal with the stuff his older sister should have taught him: don't stand with your hands on your hips, when someone short is trying to pass by, cover your mouth when you yawn, and quit making yawning noise. Who makes noise when they yawn? It's a silent yawn for 90% of Americans. yes, something stupid and I've asked politely over and over again, but I hate to nag. It's better to ignore till I [/quote
Marriage takes work for both in it,its not always easy believe me,but but yourself first in order to take care of family
I was the 3rd oldest in family of eight.so I grew up knowing what it takes.but love an undwrstanding you have to have..

1/6/2015 4:42:48 PM Is marriage obsolete ?  

mr_bdm
Weirton, WV
48, joined Jul. 2014


Quote from alphaman81:
yes def 50% end in divorce, people do it for financial gains, tax breaks, or because they feel it's the thing to do, till death do u part a promise to god but only half the time.
.totally agree bro !

1/6/2015 4:58:19 PM Is marriage obsolete ?  

mr_bdm
Weirton, WV
48, joined Jul. 2014


women in the workplace,computer.chat rooms, the old days the man worked ..wives stayed home .marriages lasted....no offense to you hard working ladies!

1/6/2015 6:52:58 PM Is marriage obsolete ?  

pickygirl72
Over 10,000 Posts!!! (13,002)
Phelan, CA
44, joined Sep. 2011


Quote from iheartidiots:
One good thing about marriage.

only if u have children. My ex and I didn't get a great refund, we had no kids. All I got was his mistakes that now fell on me to help pay the government back.

OP marriage is what you make it. If u feel the person u are dating isnt worthy of marrying don't marry her. Marriage is just a contract with another person.

1/6/2015 6:55:03 PM Is marriage obsolete ?  

thomasclement77
Over 1,000 Posts (1,107)
Florence, OR
28, joined Nov. 2014


Marriage is obsolete for men.

1/6/2015 6:55:36 PM Is marriage obsolete ?  

thomasclement77
Over 1,000 Posts (1,107)
Florence, OR
28, joined Nov. 2014


Marriage is obsolete for women.

1/6/2015 7:43:22 PM Is marriage obsolete ?  

luxorus
Over 2,000 Posts (3,415)
Pachacamac
Peru
36, joined Apr. 2014


yes

1/6/2015 7:43:47 PM Is marriage obsolete ?  

mr_bdm
Weirton, WV
48, joined Jul. 2014


Quote from thomasclement77:
Marriage is obsolete for women.
good answer !

1/7/2015 12:58:18 PM Is marriage obsolete ?  
amusicluvr
Over 4,000 Posts! (5,675)
Salem, OR
62, joined Nov. 2013


Marriage is not obsolete. It still bestows certain legal rights that non-marriage does not. Certain people-at certain income levels-are always going to want the legal rights that marriage bestows, so they will always seek marriage. They will be 'upper middle income', and above types. Lower income types do not get the legal benefits of marriage, and they do get all of the detriments of marriage, so they are tending to marry less. The poorer you are, the less apt you are to marry. The richer you are, (or you want to be) the more apt you are to marry. Since marriage always benefits the government, marriage will always be present in some form at some level of society. If the government decides that too few people are marrying, the government will change current laws, policies, department regulations, etc, so as to encourage more marriage. Requiring poor people to be married in order to qualify for Welfare would be one way to do so.



[Edited 1/7/2015 1:00:52 PM ]

1/7/2015 2:48:20 PM Is marriage obsolete ?  

browcottoncandy
Nottingham, MD
39, joined Dec. 2014


No marriage isn't.Even thou alot of people don't feel pressured to put a ring on it.

1/7/2015 2:57:06 PM Is marriage obsolete ?  
smstephanie
Over 4,000 Posts! (4,331)
Moorhead, MN
41, joined May. 2014


Well if someone is opposed to it best to stay away from it...I would like to get remarried again someday I still believe in it.

1/7/2015 3:02:49 PM Is marriage obsolete ?  
numbersor_only
Austin, TX
55, joined Nov. 2014


Marriage is not quite as defined as it used to be. Freedom to be you and me has injected some amount of subjective interpretation of marriage. In the old days, all you needed was a pocket knife, so you could cut a stout branch from any nearby bush, to settle things. Now, holy hell on the half-shell, it takes some impossible mixture of daytime TV show morality and the threat of restraining orders to guarantee marital bliss. Obsolete is too strong. Unlikely, is more like it. Kids today just don't care one way or another whether their parents are in a solid and government sanctioned union, or just had a few minutes and nobody watching on a late night bus going downtown.



[Edited 1/7/2015 3:03:32 PM ]

1/7/2015 3:13:01 PM Is marriage obsolete ?  

nicoli7
Over 4,000 Posts! (5,970)
Louisville, KY
31, joined Jul. 2014


I've never been married.
But I've seen what it is supposed to be.
My grandparents were married for over 50 years.
They supported each other, and dedicated their lives to family first.
Never gave up....even in hard times.

Most people now a days are too selfish and self absorbed for that kind of commitment.

One spouse might be.....but the other won't be.
That's why a lot of marriages fail today as compared to then.

If you have 2 people that are truly like minded...
Then it will last....and stand the test of time.

1/7/2015 3:13:03 PM Is marriage obsolete ?  
lookin4him2012
Over 7,500 Posts!! (9,186)
Boone, NC
46, joined Jan. 2012


Quote from chitowngirl78:
Nope, I just think people get married for the wrong reasons.


I do too. I think people rush in to marriage and don't realize they really want that person yet but get overwhelmed with the happy feeling that love gives them and later on after living day to day with that person they realize they made a mistake.

I also think people grow and change a lot in a marriage and the younger they get married the worse it can be. If both people don't change together then one will get tired of that and move on.

My first boyfriend I ever dated was for 11 long years and I knew after half that time of dating that he wasn't the one I wanted for a life long relationship or marriage. It took dating him a long time to realize it and I'm thankful to this day I never entered in to a legal marriage with him. ugh. I am very glad I just wasted time dating him and could walk away in the end.

1/7/2015 3:16:14 PM Is marriage obsolete ?  
lookin4him2012
Over 7,500 Posts!! (9,186)
Boone, NC
46, joined Jan. 2012


Quote from 1_2manyfrogs:
My grandparents raised me. So I saw what they had and I would love to have that kind of marriage. She was HAPPY and so was he. She'd get up and make him a hot breakfast before he went off to work. Dinner was always ready when he got home. The house was immaculate. Laundry was hung on the line to dry and then ironed and put away. There was always work to be done and a schedule to keep. It was a really nice way to grow up.

Sadly, the world is not like that any more. Too bad.


It's not like that anymore because more and more women choose to go out and work and refuse to let the husband be the man. But then again, I let my ex-husband be the man and lived exactly like your grandparents did but he still left me for someone else. So that doesn't always make a person happy. Plus, you never know when someone is unhappy and just so old that they hang in there til death because it's the choice they made. The older generation didn't divorce like they do now. They stuck it out even if they grew older and didn't really like the situation, they hung in there because of the commitment. Some were miserable and you never would have known it because of the smile they kept on their face.

1/7/2015 4:44:25 PM Is marriage obsolete ?  
24milkduds
Over 4,000 Posts! (4,193)
San Francisco, CA
55, joined Mar. 2012


Nope...people in love still getting married

1/7/2015 6:06:43 PM Is marriage obsolete ?  
cupocheer
Over 10,000 Posts!!! (136,140)
Assumption, IL
65, joined May. 2010


No

1/7/2015 6:15:19 PM Is marriage obsolete ?  
2times2many
Greenwood Lake, NY
29, joined Jan. 2014


Quote from cupocheer:
No
yes, no!

1/8/2015 4:26:37 AM Is marriage obsolete ?  

happylauren
Over 2,000 Posts (3,288)
Crown Point, IN
53, joined May. 2013


Quote from mr_bdm:
women in the workplace,computer.chat rooms, the old days the man worked ..wives stayed home .marriages lasted....no offense to you hard working ladies!



My parents were married 64 years when she died a couple of years ago. Most of the ladies in the nursing home were only married once, they still love their husbands. People were taught to stay married and work things out. I blame media and movies for painting an unrealistic picture of what life is. So many people are looking for someone who does not exist. No one is perfect because we are all human.

I think under the right circumstances love and marriage is the most beautiful thing in the world.

Anyone want to get married? Lol.

1/8/2015 4:29:16 AM Is marriage obsolete ?  

kcishere
Over 1,000 Posts (1,317)
League City, TX
28, joined Jul. 2013


Yes

1/8/2015 9:51:58 AM Is marriage obsolete ?  

riflessivo
Over 10,000 Posts!!! (14,316)
AlmafuerteStaffordshire
United Kingdom
40, joined Jan. 2014


Quote from kcishere:
Yes


Sooo you don't want to get married. No more nookie for you

1/8/2015 11:27:23 AM Is marriage obsolete ?  

ladiebugg55
Over 2,000 Posts (2,465)
Redding, CA
79, joined Jun. 2012


Quote from mr_bdm:
is marriage obsolete


Not in my mind it isn't..I'm marriage material and believe there's someone for everyone, it just takes time..rushing into marriage for the sake of being married is foolish and doesn't last..true love is very real..so many people give up when times are tough and don't work at keeping the spark alive..such a shame because it's so worth the effort to make it work..

1/8/2015 12:26:00 PM Is marriage obsolete ?  

dmolark
Over 4,000 Posts! (5,168)
Chicago, IL
63, joined Jun. 2014


marriage is necessary for contemporary society. it's like you both make social contracts to each other and it eliminates the need to 'wonder around' which is a great relief for many. even those deviants to this social accord also recognize their own principles of commitment including financial.

1/8/2015 2:29:18 PM Is marriage obsolete ?  

archer513
Cincinnati, OH
40, joined Dec. 2014
online now!


I don't know about necessity. For me it's about family. I love family. Never been married. I was at least smart enough to know how dumb I was in my 20's and early 30's. It's hard at my age to find woman who are on the same plain as me as far as family. A lot of jaded women with excuses,but not all. Finding depth isn't easy In our shallow,materialistic society. I have hope though. Wife material is more elusive than a perfect diamond. Lol



[Edited 1/8/2015 2:30:05 PM ]

1/8/2015 2:31:00 PM Is marriage obsolete ?  

xray6
Over 10,000 Posts!!! (14,636)
Fort Stewart, GA
27, joined Mar. 2012
online now!


Quote from rose1206:
Not even close, where I live has a very high marriage rate.


Every where dose

1/8/2015 3:34:38 PM Is marriage obsolete ?  

mr_bdm
Weirton, WV
48, joined Jul. 2014


THEN why is divorce rate so high ?

1/8/2015 7:23:01 PM Is marriage obsolete ?  

theringhand
Kalamazoo, MI
35, joined Jul. 2014


marriage laws absolutely are.

1/8/2015 7:33:59 PM Is marriage obsolete ?  

vagmasterflash
Over 1,000 Posts (1,416)
Durand, WI
49, joined Nov. 2014
online now!


I kept both halves. I didn't give her half of anything because I didn't get involved with the half stealer in the first place. I win.