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2/6/2009 12:55:25 AM The way to a single mom's heart ;)  

sunshynie
Duluth, MN
32, joined Feb. 2009


If a guy only knew how to get to a single mom's heart he would be on top of the world!

Single moms already want that family thing, because they taste it everyday. All you have to do is pamper that side of that woman, and you've already gotten yourself some amazing brownie points~*

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2/7/2009 7:13:51 AM The way to a single mom's heart ;)  
definitely_ltr
Over 4,000 Posts! (6,223)
Stroudsburg, PA
54, joined Sep. 2008


Is to accept the crazy, hectic, nonstop life that she leads
and to be there for her when she has a moment to slow down!

Aaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhh!!! If it only were that simple!

It gets so much harder as you get older and have a young one around.
Most men are too chicken or set in their ways to even want to deal with a single mom.

2/7/2009 10:50:21 AM The way to a single mom's heart ;)  
singlefather216
Jordan, MN
29, joined May. 2008


Quote from definitely_ltr:
Is to accept the crazy, hectic, nonstop life that she leads
and to be there for her when she has a moment to slow down!

Aaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhh!!! If it only were that simple!

It gets so much harder as you get older and have a young one around.
Most men are too chicken or set in their ways to even want to deal with a single mom.


Not me!!! I would love to meet single parent women.

2/8/2009 3:03:03 AM The way to a single mom's heart ;)  
_solitude_
Jacksonville, FL
33, joined Feb. 2009


I too have noticed that it's a lot harder to date w/a child.



[Edited 2/8/2009 3:04:05 AM ]

2/8/2009 6:47:19 AM The way to a single mom's heart ;)  
definitely_ltr
Over 4,000 Posts! (6,223)
Stroudsburg, PA
54, joined Sep. 2008


Well there ya' go!
Sunshynie and singlefather!!
Same state and ideals!
Go for it you two!! heheheheheee

2/8/2009 8:39:08 AM The way to a single mom's heart ;)  

harleyryder98
Omaha, NE
54, joined Jan. 2009


Im a single father of two who live with me and I find it hard to find anyone interested in dating a single father my age

2/8/2009 12:27:27 PM The way to a single mom's heart ;)  
countryboy3248
Lansing, MI
31, joined Jan. 2009


i haven't had bad luck....but I'm counting the days..luck doesn't last forever!

2/8/2009 2:46:42 PM The way to a single mom's heart ;)  

sunshynie
Duluth, MN
32, joined Feb. 2009


It's hard to date and be a mom, but only because I'm that type of girl who isn't ready to let just any guy meet my child. If I were I'm sure it would be so much simpler.

Patience is a quality that I desire in the man of my life

2/8/2009 5:29:32 PM The way to a single mom's heart ;)  
motorider71
Over 7,500 Posts!! (8,530)
Stafford Springs, CT
44, joined Jan. 2008


...single dads need pampering too!!!

2/10/2009 2:19:45 PM The way to a single mom's heart ;)  
falbert
Hartsville, IN
65, joined Mar. 2008


I think the way to a single mom's heart is very similar to the way to a single guy's heart. I have two at home and they are my priority; especially my daughter who is 15. I haven't had the time to get romantically involved with anyone and the woman that I am interested in has just come out of a relationship and I don't want to be pushy right now. She has two daughters and I would like to get to know her better. She is quite a bit younger than I am but I don't think that is a problem. She is constantly working as I am and she doesn't have much time. I have patience and am willing to wait. I was widowed almost 2 years ago and had to get over a lot of emotions to be able to be interested in someone again. I am optimistic, if she is not the one, there is another someone out there!!!

2/10/2009 8:29:30 PM The way to a single mom's heart ;)  

jonnyspec
Tampa, FL
46, joined Jan. 2009


Us single Dads find it hard also to find a date.. Seems like alot of women run the other way as soon as they find out a guy is raising a child ( i.e. lives with him full time)



[Edited 2/10/2009 8:29:59 PM ]

2/10/2009 9:25:34 PM The way to a single mom's heart ;)  
jazimine
Marlette, MI
50, joined Feb. 2009


BEING HONEST IS ALWAYS NICE

2/11/2009 6:31:16 PM The way to a single mom's heart ;)  
titusthelonely
Altamonte Springs, FL
32, joined Jan. 2009


Quote from motorider71:
...single dads need pampering too!!!
thats funny, but kinda true. mostly its us guys that ditch the family, which is lame. but when its the other way around, wow. so far i've talked to some women that haven't ran the other way when i talk about my girls. i love my daughters, and i will do whatever it takes for them. they are my priority, and when i get a chance to find someone to talk to and hang out with me, great. but i am not looking for a new mom for them. i do think its sweet that people treat my girls with respect and kindness.

2/12/2009 8:35:35 PM The way to a single mom's heart ;)  
beu24
Over 2,000 Posts (2,291)
Virginia Beach, VA
57, joined May. 2008


I guess it depend on the woman, men have certain taste and tend to stick to their preference, then you have to look at why they are a single parent, and what age are they as a single parent it has a lot to do with men discissions.

2/13/2009 1:57:46 AM The way to a single mom's heart ;)  
fungagentleman
Atlanta, GA
47, joined Dec. 2008


Quote from jonnyspec:
Us single Dads find it hard also to find a date.. Seems like alot of women run the other way as soon as they find out a guy is raising a child ( i.e. lives with him full time)



AMEN BROTHER. I find that they love to hang out and play, but single women with older (out of the house children) and single childless women don't want anything to do with a man with kids when it comes to getting serious. So my reservation to only date women with youger kids either thrusts me into dating much younger women (often full of drama and insecurities) or women my age who struggle finding the time as well. It's such a problem thatmy kids often try to help search for a woman for me.

2/13/2009 7:06:29 AM The way to a single mom's heart ;)  

jonnyspec
Tampa, FL
46, joined Jan. 2009


Quote from beu24:
I guess it depend on the woman, men have certain taste and tend to stick to their preference, then you have to look at why they are a single parent, and what age are they as a single parent it has a lot to do with men discissions.


Well take me for example. I'm a widower. I would still be with her\ otherwise (spent 17 wonderful years together). But I don't know if it i the combo of My looks and have a daughter that scare ladies or what.. I just seem to see a lot of "Unread Deleted" on the various sites I am on. Just my 2 cents

2/13/2009 11:17:31 AM The way to a single mom's heart ;)  
sassydame1979
Milford, MI
36, joined Jan. 2009


A good way to a single mom heart is to get to know her and the child at the same time take them both out and then take the mom out ones a week alone.

2/13/2009 9:06:55 PM The way to a single mom's heart ;)  
christa29
Monmouth, IL
37, joined Sep. 2008


Well another way to a single mom's heart is not to play game's, flirt w/ other woman, to let her know that she's all the guy thinks about. I thought I found a good guy, until another woman started telling me bad stuff, when him and her met, so now he got tired of being caught and ended it.

2/13/2009 11:39:49 PM The way to a single mom's heart ;)  
glamorgirl25
Ogden, UT
33, joined Sep. 2008


don't approach the mom thinking you are going to hop into bed with her. she has more respect then that for herself. let alone lower her self to a level of no return. get to know her with open arms. a single mom has alot of pressure on her shoulders and she doesn't need the slut word floating around with everything else.

2/14/2009 12:15:23 PM The way to a single mom's heart ;)  

ladyweb35
Lubbock, TX
43, joined Jan. 2009


I am a single mother. The way of my heart is treating me special and enjoying to spend time with my son and me. Another thing is that I need someone that will be there when life is good and also when it turns bumps in the road. He must also know how to do finances, it makes a difference.

If I am less stressed about finances or the bumps in the road, I can be fun and more myself. Being a single mother, we want to be able to take something out of our life and have fun.

2/14/2009 1:49:13 PM The way to a single mom's heart ;)  
singlefather216
Jordan, MN
29, joined May. 2008


Quote from jonnyspec:
Us single Dads find it hard also to find a date.. Seems like alot of women run the other way as soon as they find out a guy is raising a child ( i.e. lives with him full time)


Yup thats what it feels like with me!!!!

2/15/2009 12:09:05 AM The way to a single mom's heart ;)  
metalelement
Shenandoah, IA
35, joined Jan. 2009


Quote from harleyryder98:
Im a single father of two who live with me and I find it hard to find anyone interested in dating a single father my age


Don't feel bad man, it's not any easier at my age. I've got a 3 and 4 year old, haven't had a date since their mother took off 2 years ago.

2/15/2009 8:24:19 AM The way to a single mom's heart ;)  
charlie511
Mesquite, TX
46, joined Feb. 2009


Hey being a single parent its soooo hard,I know Im a single parent too...

2/15/2009 8:51:49 AM The way to a single mom's heart ;)  
katw77
Roselle Park, NJ
39, joined Jan. 2009


yup, Im single mom. It can be hard getting sitters sometime, especially weekends, and especially when you dont have much family left to help.

Im with ladyweb. It is definitly a plus when a guy offers to come hang out with my son and I. Its sweet and showing that they are a family guy and that they wouldnt mind much about it. It hasnt happened yet though. Kat

2/15/2009 8:06:18 PM The way to a single mom's heart ;)  
devildog1965
Lexington, SC
50, joined Mar. 2008


good luck on you quest

2/17/2009 2:18:25 AM The way to a single mom's heart ;)  

marbs2402
Duluth, MN
37, joined Nov. 2008


I think when you meet the right person it wont matter if you have kids or not. I also think the way to her heart is just being yourself and being thoughtful of the person your with. she aint good enough for me if my boys aint good enough for her. I would actually prefer to meet a single mother.

sunshynie, id love to buy you a drink sometime

2/19/2009 9:00:56 PM The way to a single mom's heart ;)  

ladyweb35
Lubbock, TX
43, joined Jan. 2009


The way to my heart is treating me with respect, giving me back rubs, and making me feel special. If I feel that you are treating me right, I will do my best to make you feel special by different means.

2/22/2009 2:57:55 PM The way to a single mom's heart ;)  

sunshynie
Duluth, MN
32, joined Feb. 2009


Quote from glamorgirl25:
don't approach the mom thinking you are going to hop into bed with her. a single mom has alot of pressure on her shoulders and she doesn't need the slut word floating around with everything else.


SOOO TRUE!!!!

Some times I feel as though that's all men see me as "a piece of meat" and I just am not that sort of girl!!

I wish I could find a good guy with good morals and something going for himself. Someone that knows that a girl is still a girl with our without kids. I honestly don't think it should matter that I have a little man. I have no prob finding a sitter (always family of course ) So I just need to find a decent guy to use that time with.

2/22/2009 4:41:17 PM The way to a single mom's heart ;)  

minmin24
Over 1,000 Posts (1,037)
Grove City, OH
31, joined Jul. 2008


im a single mom with out any luck either, i just want a man who can be honest with me and accept the fact that i have a daughter, i would love to date a single dad because he knows what its like, when you cant find a sitter and vise versa

2/23/2009 9:27:05 AM The way to a single mom's heart ;)  

serenityfrank
Over 4,000 Posts! (4,719)
Toms River, NJ
58, joined Sep. 2008


honesty,compassion,respect and love,,

shortcuts will only cut everyone short

2/23/2009 1:08:49 PM The way to a single mom's heart ;)  

vicious05
Covington, GA
29, joined Feb. 2009


in my case, she said she didn't love me anymore, but i am a great father to my children. I'm not a shallow person, I first look at personality then looks

2/24/2009 9:02:12 AM The way to a single mom's heart ;)  
tdub42
Brookville, OH
50, joined Mar. 2008


being patient...attentive...proactively communicate...giving space

2/24/2009 9:11:20 AM The way to a single mom's heart ;)  
zippyzappsu
Oklahoma City, OK
37, joined Feb. 2009


I think being a single parent and dating is difficult all the way around, not more so for single moms or single dads. Each group has their own complications, and unattached singles don't want to deal with the hassle of what young children can cause in the dating life. Which of course leads to the "Brady Bunch syndrome".
Where this lady met this fellow, and they each have a brood, but somehow they make it work and become a combined family. It's more common now than ever, because so many have children but either never got married, did not stay married or lost a spouse.
Well, I just pray that whether the man I find is a single dad, or an unattached single man, he understands that children must come first and anything after that is gravy.
My 2 cents, anyhow.

2/25/2009 6:47:53 PM The way to a single mom's heart ;)  
sphere74
Ellijay, GA
41, joined Nov. 2007


well dating is all about geting to know the person,spending time with them,yes the all presant speed of life is at hand here so we have to schedule our time accordingly but at the same time if(peoples) walls are to high whats the point in looking in the first place,do a back ground check,and or date a man who has children of his own,should give you some relief.
not pointing fingers but some people are real dramma queens cause they where abandoned by the childs father so they have a male complex and dont even know it so it seems and they reay are are not ready to date. and i really dont blame them cause its happened to me,she took the child and just left,so i can relate.
i guess what i am saying is every one is in such fear all you can do is use your best judgement and go from there.

2/26/2009 7:27:01 AM The way to a single mom's heart ;)  
fleabuster
Decatur, AL
53, joined Dec. 2007


Hello all heres one for ya! Im a dad but my kids are in california i currently live with a good woman who loves me, and i thought i was happy until i met a woman with a great kid and we all seemed to click right away, (i did not cheat on the one i am with) and i thought she was THE ONE! But a 13 time felon just ain't for me! But! after that i knew that i could never be truly happy with the one i am with! (no kids in the home) And i started shutting down and falling into depression. It was very hard but i explained to her that i knew in my heart that i could never be truly happy without a child or children in my life. The problem is there is no way she can afford to live on her own! I would give anything to find a woman with a great kid who needs a great guy!

3/2/2009 2:02:47 PM The way to a single mom's heart ;)  

pentopaper
Over 10,000 Posts!!! (52,079)
Okmulgee, OK
49, joined Nov. 2008


as a single father of a 2 year old i have made it ez on myself i just am not looking if and when it happens it will be on gods time not mine.
I sewd my wild oats in my 20s & 30s & had more than enough women to last a lifetime so now its just me and Emily & I kinda like it that way.....less drama...less stress.....& way more time for my daughter & she is the important one any way.
it is not fair to her to have women in & out of her life just as soon as she gets used to one she go`s away & in comes another it is JUST NOT FAIR TO DO TO MY DAUGHTER so if i am ment to have someone than god will give me one till then it`s just me n Emily & that is just fine

3/2/2009 2:17:59 PM The way to a single mom's heart ;)  
baz0987
Maple Shade, NJ
53, joined Nov. 2008


Be understanding, cook dinner a few times for her, get along with her kids. Sure fire way.

3/2/2009 2:52:04 PM The way to a single mom's heart ;)  
journey12
Crawfordville, GA
37, joined Feb. 2009


As a single Mother of five years now, I would have to say the greatest asset a man can have to win my heart are not very complicated

Understanding: With children things can change suddenly and emergencys can come without warning from a fever to a fall off his bike that may counter act other engagements I have made with a man. The boys always come first.

family oriented:someone who has children and therefore would think a date at a local theme park or a zoo including all the children is rewarding a fun

3/10/2009 3:45:55 AM The way to a single mom's heart ;)  

sunshynie
Duluth, MN
32, joined Feb. 2009


I completely agree with the post above mine

3/10/2009 3:25:45 PM The way to a single mom's heart ;)  

bgood2me72
Pequot Lakes, MN
43, joined May. 2008


One other issue that I have ran across as a single parent (and I am sure that I am not the only one lol) is that I do have a habit of looking more at woman who do have children also. Mainly because I know right away they get the whole life with kids thing and generally understand it......but then I run into a lot of times were you have single parents (I state parents because I am sure this syndrome goes both ways) were they are looking for some one who is willing to take on the responsibility of possibly eventually raising their children with them .....but they themselves are unwilling to consider dating someone who has children because they dont want to take on any more then they already have .....hope that all made sense lol

3/10/2009 11:00:44 PM The way to a single mom's heart ;)  

f1gm3nt
Charlotte, NC
45, joined Mar. 2009


As a father of 2 (having custody of one and visitation with the other), I don't need a mom for my children. What I need is a partner in life. Don't expect me to raise your children for you if you are not willing to do the same for mine. I spent many years as a stepfather and now that he is grown and off to college and his mother and I are no longer together, I still consider him my kid. I raised him. I instilled in him, the morals that I was raised on and have learn over my years. I taught him my mistakes and hope that he will become a better man than I.

So break it down... It's not whether it's a mom or a dad that you date. It's a family. It's a partnership, not a dictatorship.

3/13/2009 10:13:13 AM The way to a single mom's heart ;)  
rrrsmile
Over 4,000 Posts! (4,668)
York, PA
52, joined Mar. 2009


Quote from jonnyspec:
Us single Dads find it hard also to find a date.. Seems like alot of women run the other way as soon as they find out a guy is raising a child ( i.e. lives with him full time)


Well, silly ladies to be sure....a single Dad raised me so I see and appreciate that in a man. Above average in the responsibility department Comparted to a man who has been busy trying to be the father of our country and is clueless as to what the "kids" are doing all 6 of them!

3/15/2009 2:00:49 AM The way to a single mom's heart ;)  

miranda30
Modesto, CA
37, joined Jan. 2009


Quote from f1gm3nt:
As a father of 2 (having custody of one and visitation with the other), I don't need a mom for my children. What I need is a partner in life. Don't expect me to raise your children for you if you are not willing to do the same for mine. I spent many years as a stepfather and now that he is grown and off to college and his mother and I are no longer together, I still consider him my kid. I raised him. I instilled in him, the morals that I was raised on and have learn over my years. I taught him my mistakes and hope that he will become a better man than I.

So break it down... It's not whether it's a mom or a dad that you date. It's a family. It's a partnership, not a dictatorship.


Amen to that! I don't want a daddy for my kids, my son has 2 too many and my daughter has a wonderful father who loves her more than life itself. What I need is a life partner. Someone to hold me when things get tough, someone who will be there when I feel like it's just to much. I want someone to love me, care for me, provide for ME. Helping with my children is a bonus, but I am more than capable of caring for my kids. I am not looking for a relationship because I think my kids need one so badly. I am looking for a relationship because I need one. It's a bonus if the kids like em, and things work out and everyone lives happily ever after. But falling in love has nothing to do with my kids, it's a ME thing here. The kid would be perfectly fine if I never get involved with anyone ever again. Hell they'd probably be better off for it. That's just the reality of things.

We are all here because WE want something for OURSELVES. It has nothing to do with what the children need or are lacking. Granted as parents, we need to make sure that whoever we get involved with will be good for them, but still... our kids are not the people who need a boyfriend/girlfriend or husband/wife.

But with that being said, any single mom or dad who didn't look at the other person's familial skills would be crazy. We are what we are, and our kids are at home. The reality is.... if I am gonna marry you, you gotta at least know how to make toast without burning the bread. Basically, to put it bluntly... if you aren't family material, hit the road cause I can't have you corrupting my lil ones. It's not a choice here, it's a lifestyle. Ultimately, we need a partner who is going to be there beside us, not tell us how to do things they may or may not have even done in life.

3/15/2009 10:26:33 PM The way to a single mom's heart ;)  
corgilvr83
Clovis, NM
32, joined Feb. 2009


Quote from singlefather216:
Not me!!! I would love to meet single parent women.


Where are all the boys like you, near ME haha!
Singlefather216... you have a gorgeous daughter!


The way to a single mom's heart is through romance, compassion, understanding, love and trust... and maybe interact with her kids too! She'd love that!

3/19/2009 8:40:23 PM The way to a single mom's heart ;)  
miss28
Blairsville, PA
36, joined Feb. 2009


it's to except everything that comes with being a single mom thats being second not first learning how life with kids is hard and not putting the mother down for the wat she raises her kids.

3/21/2009 9:18:53 PM The way to a single mom's heart ;)  
devildog1965
Lexington, SC
50, joined Mar. 2008


Just takes the right guy to date a single mother.

3/23/2009 4:30:37 PM The way to a single mom's heart ;)  

skdnmother
Maumelle, AR
43, joined Mar. 2009


The way through my heart is not through my kids. I feel the guy should impress me with his skills and communication. A man that has good communication and skills can pick up on what the woman wants.

Most single mothers are strong leaders of their family and they just want someone to take the leadership off of their shoulders. They want to be wanted not needed.

A man should know it takes time to get to know one another, and he should not rush things. Therefore the single mother will not feel that the man is after just one thing..

This is not written in stone, every single mother differ. This is just my take on how the man can win his way to my heart.

3/27/2009 8:32:53 PM The way to a single mom's heart ;)  
spmck1
Superior, WI
39, joined Nov. 2008


the hardest part is finding some one that understands what its like to have kids i wont date anyone wit out a child because they just understand the time it takes and the fact that sometimes you have to cancle plans to take care of them .. women with out kids dont get that

3/27/2009 8:46:41 PM The way to a single mom's heart ;)  
kathy5311
Over 1,000 Posts (1,687)
Jackson, GA
48, joined Nov. 2007


Quote from skdnmother:
The way through my heart is not through my kids. I feel the guy should impress me with his skills and communication. A man that has good communication and skills can pick up on what the woman wants.

Most single mothers are strong leaders of their family and they just want someone to take the leadership off of their shoulders. They want to be wanted not needed.

A man should know it takes time to get to know one another, and he should not rush things. Therefore the single mother will not feel that the man is after just one thing..

This is not written in stone, every single mother differ. This is just my take on how the man can win his way to my heart.


You are so right on target!

3/27/2009 9:39:50 PM The way to a single mom's heart ;)  

mfsteve
Phoenix, AZ
33, joined Nov. 2008


I think the only way to a single moms heart is to show her she can trust you to be the man you say you are, and its the same way for a single father. its about breaking down the walls built up by the other person thats not in there life anymore

3/31/2009 8:48:16 AM The way to a single mom's heart ;)  
little_bit74
Branford, FL
41, joined Mar. 2009


I would just like to find a guy who has a job, is responsible, honest and faithful. I would also like to find a guy who can be my best friend and understands that my son is always First.

3/31/2009 8:59:17 AM The way to a single mom's heart ;)  
socalgirl71
Over 4,000 Posts! (6,216)
Marietta, GA
45, joined Mar. 2009


Being a single mother of 4 - ages 11, 17, 19 and 21 it has been hard for me for many many years. Especially when they were younger. Although 3 of them are pretty much grown, they are still my number 1 priority and always will be. The way to my heart is to understand that but also know that there is room for him if our relationship works. Obviously, he has to like kids, like my kids, and not just like them because he likes me.

And I agree with some of the other posts - be patient because I will not bring anyone home to meet them until I am comfortable with him and have a good feeling that we may be together for a while or longer. He must also include them in our plans too. Yes, we need our alone time but that is not always possible.

3/31/2009 11:33:04 AM The way to a single mom's heart ;)  

im4x4man
Blountville, TN
51, joined Mar. 2009


Wow who new thats all it took. Thanks

3/31/2009 11:54:27 AM The way to a single mom's heart ;)  

tommceachern
Pittsburgh, PA
44, joined Mar. 2009


i usually get along better with the kids,

3/31/2009 1:45:26 PM The way to a single mom's heart ;)  

pentopaper
Over 10,000 Posts!!! (52,079)
Okmulgee, OK
49, joined Nov. 2008


Quote from skdnmother:
The way through my heart is not through my kids. I feel the guy should impress me with his skills and communication. A man that has good communication and skills can pick up on what the woman wants.

Most single mothers are strong leaders of their family and they just want someone to take the leadership off of their shoulders. They want to be wanted not needed.

A man should know it takes time to get to know one another, and he should not rush things. Therefore the single mother will not feel that the man is after just one thing..

This is not written in stone, every single mother differ. This is just my take on how the man can win his way to my heart.


Very well said,Myself I have just plain quit looking I talk to a few females on here & have a few female friends & if something does come along great but if not I have my little girl & she makes me happy. I think it will happen someday but until then im not going to worry about it (my 2 year old is enough to worry about)& just live my life.

3/31/2009 10:35:07 PM The way to a single mom's heart ;)  
libra8907
Akron, OH
26, joined Mar. 2009


I hate it when guys think that because you have kids you are easy to get in bed lol if they only knew and now days you have to wacth out for your lil ones

4/1/2009 11:48:25 AM The way to a single mom's heart ;)  
m_h_miller69
Syracuse, IN
47, joined Sep. 2008


I'm still not sure how to anyone's heart, but if a lady has children I would prefer to meet them before I get too involved. Children are part of the package and its only fair to get a glimpse of the whole package. Plus how children behave tells a whole lot about the principals of the parent.

4/2/2009 7:28:20 AM The way to a single mom's heart ;)  
jerseydesertguy
Tucson, AZ
63, joined Oct. 2008


I kind of have an opposite view from the previous post. I would want to have at least some idea where a relationship was headed before introducing a child in order to minimize as far as possible the risk of yet another loss in the child's life. I don't think it does a child any good to see a succession of partners coming and going. As for the second assertion about the child's behavior being a reflection of the parent's values, there are many variables that go into shaping the child's behavior, aside from the parent's values. For example, the child could be adopted and have behavioral issues stemming from before the adoption. Bottom line, please don't be so quick to judge as you probably don't have all the facts.

4/2/2009 8:02:50 AM The way to a single mom's heart ;)  
m_h_miller69
Syracuse, IN
47, joined Sep. 2008


Quote from jerseydesertguy:
I kind of have an opposite view from the previous post. I would want to have at least some idea where a relationship was headed before introducing a child in order to minimize as far as possible the risk of yet another loss in the child's life. I don't think it does a child any good to see a succession of partners coming and going. As for the second assertion about the child's behavior being a reflection of the parent's values, there are many variables that go into shaping the child's behavior, aside from the parent's values. For example, the child could be adopted and have behavioral issues stemming from before the adoption. Bottom line, please don't be so quick to judge as you probably don't have all the facts.


Of course there are exceptions to some situations. Generally if someone has adopted a child probably somewhere along the line that would have been mentioned. I am also not referring to crawling out of bed in the morning and meeting the kids that way. My moral standards are quite different from that. There are ways to get together without appearing as a 'partner'. Maybe I hadnt phrased my last post quite as I should have, if I feel as if the relationship has a potential to work, we get along great, etc etc, then I would like to meet her children, and she meet mine, in a casual setting,a picnic, bowling, whatever, and just see how it goes. Each child is different and will behave differently, but how the parent deals with his or her children tells a lot about the person, in my humble opinion.

I'm not sure what you consider that I am judging...