theplayfull1
Kerrville, TX
58, joined Feb. 2010
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Don't even know where to begin. When my wife died I thought my life was over, and happiness and love gone forever. After 25 years of loving someone, then watching helplessly, as she withered and died in front of me. My whole world died with her. I found myself angry, alone, awash in depression. I was convinced that it was impossible for me to ever fall in love again. And even if by some small chance I did meet someone. How could I bring myself to betray my wife’s love? How could I ever allow myself to fall in love again and risk that pain and sorrow of watching someone die in front of me again? Or worse, take the chance that someone, someday might fall in love with me, and be put through what I was put through, and watch me die in front of her. I had so many reasons why I could never find happiness or love ever again. But I knew that I would never survive if I did not at least find some companionship.
So I weeded through the scams and fake profiles. Found that there were precious few sincere people. But at least they are out there. But I had half-heartedly dated a few women. I had no real intention of developing a deeper relationship. I never misled anyone by the Way. I was looking only to have a conversation over dinner once in a while, maybe take in a show, and break that horrible loneliness on occasion. A few women came and went . None of those relationships went very far. But that was the way I wanted it. Just passing the days waiting for my time to come. The sooner the better as far as I was concerned.
But life is full of twists and turns. And the unexpected can sneak up on us. One day, a woman reached out to me, who had a similar circumstance. She had emailed me that her husband had died and said, “…so here I sit not knowing if this is the right thing to do.” I knew all too well, all the emotions and doubts she was feeling. I so wanted to help her get through that horrible time. We emailed and talked on the phone quite a few times before we actually met. For the first time in a very long time I felt I had a sense of purpose again. At least I could help someone who was going through what I was going through. But what I began to realize was that in my attempts to help her, was that she was also helping me. We found ourselves laughing again and wanting to make each other laugh. We found ourselves wanting to hold hands. We found ourselves wanting to hold each other. We found ourselves wanting to kiss each other. And yes we found ourselves making love. But the most unexpected and surprising thing is that we found ourselves in love. I don’t think either of us ever saw that coming. But I know we are both happy. We have changed each other’s lives, and once again are giving and receiving the gift of love to each other.
But what of all those fears of falling in love I had mentioned? Yes. Some of them are still there. We cannot prevent a loved one from dying. Worrying about it will only serve to make us crazy, and cause us to miss all the gifts life has to offer. And that would be a terrible waste of life. As far as feeling as if I am betraying my wife? I will always lover her, and I know she always will love me. But we can never be together again. At least not on this earth, depending on your beliefs’. But I do know she loved me as much as I loved her. And if the situation was different, and I died instead of her. I would have wanted her to live on and find happiness and new love without me. And because I know she loved me, she would want the same for me. In a sense I am honoring her wishes by living life to the fullest. Who knows? Maybe my wife put this woman in front of me as a gift. All I know is that this new found love is every bit as strong as the love of my wife. Not the same, but every bit as real. I am happy once again. Life is good again! I’m in love again! I want to spend the rest of my life with this new found love. Never expected it to happen. Never saw it coming. This woman makes me so very happy. And I make her happy. Dreams sometimes do come true. So much more that can be said. But I think this is long already. So this is our success story. But I would have never thought it would all happen because of a simple email I received on this date site.
Best of luck to everyone here,
Ed
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happyface46
Palm City, FL
55, joined Feb. 2009
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extremely inspirational. I can think of a few people on here that need to read this.
where there is life there is hope.
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pet4711
San Antonio, TX
56, joined Jan. 2011
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Ed,
how romantic! I am very happy for both of you and wish you the best !!
Hugs and Kisses
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theplayfull1
Kerrville, TX
58, joined Feb. 2010
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Thanks to both of you.
Ed
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keepalowprofile
Moose Lake, MN
55, joined Jul. 2010
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Thats awesome
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122750again
Sioux Falls, SD
66, joined Dec. 2008
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Congratulations, heres to a Wonderful New Life
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browneyed08
Fredericksburg, TX
60, joined Sep. 2008
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oh my god, its like a movie but what it truely is, is a blessing how wonderful!!!thank you so much for sharing with us and letting us into your wonderful story it gives us hope. please please let us know how the two of you are doing!!!! AHHH its so exciting! GOD has truely blessed and placed the two of you together.
sandie
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