when your boyfriend ex is having a baby how do you feel? 46

5/7/2008 9:48:30 AM	when your boyfriend ex is having a baby how do you feel?
stephaniemcd85 Grand Prairie, TX age: 23	Quote from lust4love: i know i was being rude.how else do you ask for a date.lol Well in my case, that would be the wrong way to ask for a date lol. Don't got to be rude to ask for one of them you know
5/7/2008 10:23:57 AM	when your boyfriend ex is having a baby how do you feel?
lust4love Atco, NJ age: 38	well those eyes are so inviting i couldnt help it. i dont see kids in my future either ,I think im past the diaper changing years-steph
5/7/2008 11:17:46 AM	when your boyfriend ex is having a baby how do you feel?
nitecaller Edmonton, AB age: 46	been there and like a real man i sued the ex for full custody of the baby boy (which by the way his 20)now and i thats right i raised him on my own this is not about how you should or should not feel this is about a helpless little person sure if theres any doubt go get a dna test but listen up the baby didnt ask to be born so step up and do right by he or she i get so up set when people are such asses towards the child how should i feel ill tell who bloody cares
5/7/2008 2:07:28 PM	when your boyfriend ex is having a baby how do you feel?
maleni321 Decatur, GA age: 23	thinks hun for your advice, its not the child im worry about tho,,,did you read, sorry about you raising a child on your own but keep the anger there ,,where you are ,,,thanks no one bloody care about it here [Edited 5/7/2008 2:08:50 PM]
5/7/2008 3:21:02 PM	when your boyfriend ex is having a baby how do you feel?
irparis39 New York, NY age: 49	I agree with Yolanda, there's no sugar coating when it comes to kids. I love kids and have had the opportunity to raise more than my share of them, but I didn't sit there and think I've been with a guy for 4 months and how wonderful it would be to have his child. Now if you had said, I spoke with her and we've come to an understanding, that would be different and I'm immature because I didn't word things sweetly, you want sweet, get a therapist, you come to a forum you get the truth however one wants to give it to you and as you can see after me, others have used other metaphors...this girl already has to raise a child on her own, even if she forgot her BC or it failed it still just as much HIS responsiblity to take care of his business and make sure his 'yogurt' didn't spill into stray "holes", but the truth is no one cared, no thought about another child growing up in another fatherless home with no father figure to show him what kind of man he should be. That ticks me off, you don't like it...tough, stuck it up. I'm not going to assume he's a black man, but if he is,black children are demoralize enough by most, not all, single mothers who can't get their act together enough except to get pregnant. Its like this is the only thing women seem to know how to do. We were not created to just lie on our backs, we have brains too. I never said he was a loser, I said he was a dumbass, there is a difference, because he didn't cover himself so that when he got involve in another relationship his baggage wouldn't come with him and turn you upside down, which you may not admit it, but it has and not for the better. Just like I told my nephew at 15, if you go by what the girl is saying and you don't take responsibility for your own procreation, you're just as stupid as she is. There is no one today who doesn't know where sex leads. He didn't listen, he now has a 15 yr old, thank goodness the others have no intention of having children until they 30s...they like to play too much and travel and hang with their friends. We have always taught them, that once children come as a teen, their lives are over as they know it, cos we're not taking care of any kids. Anyone else will look at this as he got HER pregnant and now he's moved on to you. You want to live up in the clouds, fine do so, but do it with eyes wide open, love has a way of clouding your mind where you can't see the forest from the trees as this poor girl is obviously going to find out. And growing up in a predominately black and hispanic neighborhood, the statistics are, that the new g/f doesn't exactly support the b/f who may have a child with another woman, so I am also seeing it from that standpoint. But its sad all around, not for the adults, they knew what they were doing, but for the kids. As someone said, children are not a gift for your man, they are a symbol of the love that's shared between two people who have sacrifrice to put all their ducks in a row, so that this kid can grow up in as stable home as possible with parents who show love and respect for each other and them. This kid grows up with nothing. As for judgement, get used to, we are all judged based on something and if you're going to get offending over each thing then you're not as mature as you expected, because if it were me, instead of pointing fingers, I would be tending to my ducks. But then again, I've never been one to learn things the hard way and am baggage free because of it. paris
5/7/2008 6:40:36 PM	when your boyfriend ex is having a baby how do you feel?
maleni321 Decatur, GA age: 23	im happy you fell the freedom to lay what ever you think an a punching advice belong more power to you ,,,its a good thing you have your ducks in a row or else it would be you on the other stick or as you would say duumb a side of the stick,,, (funny) or maybe you were a little bit less immature then i am ,,love,,,,, who gives a flippin bird,,, for life is life you choose to do as you please, as i can see through your writting,,, you live and then you die,,honey,, and so during that period of time one will do what makes them happy,,, and if having kids makes me happy then jolly, oh my god that what im going to do ,,love. but i repeat,, (NOT AT THE MOMENT).. get it got it good,... anywho,,,,,not saying at the lest that i want you to sugar code,,, cause im the type that can care less,, ( I knew you people with,yall duck in a row would be here,my love) i would wonder tho, how would some poor fragile girl take that,just wanted to know what, would yooooooou do,,,,how would yooooou feel? cause,,,lady love i already know how i feel.,and know that the decsion alone is mines.,, and if life decide to knock me on the a ,,,hell im going to get my a back up, you know how it is. you been through it. life is not so impossible ,,, ,,,untill then thanks guy for the support ,and advice ,,, even from the ones who, are so obviouly above me (AND HAVE THEIR DUCKS IN A ROW) ,,,, DAMN THAT MUST BE NICE,,,,GOTTA LOVE EM THO [Edited 5/7/2008 6:45:57 PM]
5/7/2008 6:56:09 PM	when your boyfriend ex is having a baby how do you feel?
yolandanewell Modesto, CA age: 37	Problem with this typing thing is that you cannot get the tone of ones voice through reading... I have NO DOUBT that this advice was not meant to be rude at all... not delivered as sweetly as someone would like however the message is the same... there is no masquerading this situation with sweet nothings... it is a very serious situation - for one - the unborn child has a father that is incapable of emotional attachment and responsibility (and seems to be trying to "keep one in the shoot" just in case) - the mother of that unborn child now has the responsibility of dealing with the pregnancy understanding that the father has his sights set on another lady - ALREADY... Casonova over there has the two of you gifting your womanhood (one with a baby the other,yourself, with her heart) and then we have YOU... a 23 year old lovely young lady (quick to pull the pissed off trigger but that's just age and lack of experience) who'd rather yank her fingernails out than "hurt" this yahoo that is causing all of the "flame"... remember the small stick theory I spoke of earlier? The advice that you're quick to attack is true and LOVING... because it isn't sugar coated and it isn't meant to coddle you toward understanding that you have better things to do than pine over someone who has already proven that he moves on faster than the speed of light... I think in your heart you've heard her... and I think in your heart you understand what she's saying... I can guarantee you - woman to woman - that she actually has YOUR best interest at heart... trust me on this one.
5/7/2008 7:04:10 PM	when your boyfriend ex is having a baby how do you feel?
maleni321 Decatur, GA age: 23	at no doubt i beleive such thing ,,no one crying over spiled milk my love ,,,just looking for a towel to clean it up,, i had to say that ,,thought it was funny but ,,my mood was not a bad one ,,in the typing above ,,
5/7/2008 7:36:53 PM	when your boyfriend ex is having a baby how do you feel?
yolandanewell Modesto, CA age: 37	Quote from maleni321: at no doubt i beleive such thing ,,no one crying over spiled milk my love ,,,just looking for a towel to clean it up,, i had to say that ,,thought it was funny but ,,my mood was not a bad one ,,in the typing above ,, gotcha!!! Well, in all honesty - I hope that you get through this... just don't coddle this guy --- and as I said before... grab your dancing shoes and go have a good time with the girls.. place your focus on somethin' other than boys that don't have any clue of the catch he's getting!!!!!
5/8/2008 5:22:54 AM	when your boyfriend ex is having a baby how do you feel?
lust4love Atco, NJ age: 38	Ive dated plenty of women with children from past relationships.to me kids are kids.they may not be your blood relatives but they still can enjoy your company and learn from you. I say give kids a try and you'll see that they are lots of fun and you might even feel like a kid yourself again. [Edited 5/8/2008 5:23:53 AM]

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