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1/5/2013 3:57:28 PM Modern women vs Traditional women  
cincere__love
Skokie, IL
32, joined Dec. 2012


Can anyone explain the difference between the two? I know I'm probably going to catch hell for this thread but the curiousity and sake of conversation allowed me to do so.

I hear so many women claiming to be indendent but having so many traditional values. Most of these "traditional values" I see listed are only the ones that are beneficial toward women.

Now there is no dictionary type definition of either but after having conversation with individuals in general it almost seems a bit selfish to hold on to the idea of complete independence yet expect the benifits of a traditional women.

I mean I was actually dating a nurse who made about the same as I made and she stated to me that her idea of having traditional values were that her men should be the traditional type man providing and taking care of her and the home. Whereas her having a job only meant that he didn't have to worry about her clothing, hair and entertainment expenses. His money was to be shared between two of them and her money was for her.
That didn't make sense to me.

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1/5/2013 4:01:17 PM Modern women vs Traditional women  
groundedman36
Over 2,000 Posts (3,181)
Catasauqua, PA
41, joined Oct. 2012


I think a woman can be modern with traditional values....

Good luck op

1/5/2013 4:15:06 PM Modern women vs Traditional women  

inventtis2
Over 7,500 Posts!! (9,698)
Grand Rapids, MI
38, joined Nov. 2012


I hope you kicked her a** to the curb.

1/5/2013 4:26:46 PM Modern women vs Traditional women  
cincere__love
Skokie, IL
32, joined Dec. 2012


That's cool to have traditional values but seeing that we live in a modern day society it shouldn't expected to for every men to be obligated to certain values. Being a gentleman is always appreciated by deserving women but to expect a man to hold to traditional values down to the tee whereas you only adopt 15% of the traditional woman that's another story. Man are expected to do everything that a traditional man did but some women are able to choose whether or not they want certain values. What if I guy says that he holds on to traditional values and feel the women should...... I'm sure he'd be forever single or settling for what he can get.

1/5/2013 4:31:25 PM Modern women vs Traditional women  
cincere__love
Skokie, IL
32, joined Dec. 2012


Quote from inventtis2:
I hope you kicked her a** to the curb.


Yea. I pretty much told her that I would never consider a serious relationship with her.

1/5/2013 4:34:05 PM Modern women vs Traditional women  
afrosirene
Over 4,000 Posts! (4,192)
Brooklyn, NY
40, joined Dec. 2010


Quote from cincere__love:
Whereas her having a job only meant that he didn't have to worry about her clothing, hair and entertainment expenses. His money was to be shared between two of them and her money was for her.
That didn't make sense to me.


She is neither a traditional type or a modern type of woman.
Just full of CaCa!
I noticed she didn't mention cleaning, ironing, cooking or doing laundry.

This lady is looking for a sucker!

...And is probably in debt.....

You will be amazed at the number of fiscal irresponsible individuals who live in the US.

An entire salary based on clothing, hair and entertainment?

Really?

1/5/2013 4:45:21 PM Modern women vs Traditional women  
creative9
San Mateo, CA
49, joined Dec. 2012


a traditional woman has a husband, a modern woman has small business

a traditional woman wants a small kitchen appliance for christmas while a modern woman wants a GPS or new smart phone

a traditional woman expects the man to pay but a modern woman pays for herself, only has guy friend and doesn;t have time for a man because she is focused on career

A traditional woman wants kids within wedlock, a modern woman might consider foster kids, single paranting ie baby momma or insemination as options - or forget about having children altogether

a traditional woman would expect to defer to a man while a modern woman would trust her own opinion first and then maybe as the man if he agrees or not and if he didn't do what she wanted to do anyway

a traditional woman likes to cook and clean and enjoys laundry and child rearing while a modern woman hires a maid, orders take out and goes to the dry cleaner

A traditional woman wants a man and does not hang out with other single male guys while a modern woman has friends of both sexes and would hang with homosexuals (f*g hags)

A traditional woman prefers monogomy while a modern woman is open to FWB or FBuddies

many women are a combination of the two I could go on and on with examples but are you getting the picture??



[Edited 1/5/2013 4:48:40 PM ]

1/5/2013 4:47:52 PM Modern women vs Traditional women  
kingkraken
Jamaica, NY
36, joined Dec. 2012


Modern woman

1/5/2013 4:49:58 PM Modern women vs Traditional women  

meetme28269
Over 1,000 Posts (1,687)
Mooresville, NC
70, joined Apr. 2011


Nevertheless many women feel this way and then get angry because some men will expect some type of return for the favor of spending money on them.
Hey,if you don't want to share expenses what do you expect ,a free ride just because you consider yourself pretty?
First date ,okay ,but subsequent dates,take your turn and THEN stand on even ground.
Now,not all men think that way but,if you aren't sharing expenses,aren't you kind of like a kept woman?
I would expect this post to get this thread out of the doldrums,lol.
Kiss me you fool.


1/5/2013 4:59:01 PM Modern women vs Traditional women  
loveisrare
Over 2,000 Posts (2,064)
Lake Charles, LA
23, joined Nov. 2011


I know how to cook, bake, clean, do laundry, and take care of my kids.

Im going to college to get a career to support my kids on my own.

I have been told im a mix of modern and traditional. There is only one difference though, i don't believe in traditional roles. If i ever married, everything will be as close to even as possible. There will be no main head of the household.

1/5/2013 5:40:48 PM Modern women vs Traditional women  
cincere__love
Skokie, IL
32, joined Dec. 2012


I mean it could be due to the ages of the women I date (women under 35) but truth is not many that I've met have the give take type attitude as traditional women or modern day. I have dated women who've expected me to pay for dates and be a gentleman which is perfectly fine until she invites me over and I have the intentions on maybe a cooked meal (something simple) but I'm told that she's not the type to cook for a man or I should have grabbed us something from the resturant. I mean really? Let me tell a lady I'm dating that I'm not the type to pay for a date or tell her that we'll spit the bill. That would be the last date. So with holding onto tradition what exactly do you have to offer other the sex appeal because god knows that if sex is what I'm expecting (althought that's all I'm going to get after I've "earned" it) that'll make me a complete a''hole.

1/5/2013 5:44:15 PM Modern women vs Traditional women  
creative9
San Mateo, CA
49, joined Dec. 2012


I just want to say guys that this whole gender role stuff is as confusing to us as it is to you. Some guys want to pay all the time and get mad like it is an insult to their manhood when you pull out your wallet in public. I have had it happen. Or even if you do pay they majke you slip the cash to them first so they can save face, lol!

THen others ask right up front what your assets are and try to take over your life like you're some sugar momma. . .some want to ruin your life knock you up and expect you to do it all alone. . .

I just opted out of all myself.

1/5/2013 5:55:34 PM Modern women vs Traditional women  

indianadave1951
Over 4,000 Posts! (4,117)
Mishawaka, IN
66, joined Dec. 2010


OP: so in her mind what is hers is hers and what is yours is negotiable? Wow, someone is trying to use you. Give her the old heave hoe to the curb.

1/5/2013 6:04:31 PM Modern women vs Traditional women  
sharonorahs2
Over 2,000 Posts (2,122)
Wilmington, NC
50, joined Jul. 2012


Quote from creative9:
a traditional woman has a husband, a modern woman has small business

Don't have either



a traditional woman wants a small kitchen appliance for christmas while a modern woman wants a GPS or new smart phone

I'd rather have something for the kitchen - traditional


a traditional woman expects the man to pay but a modern woman pays for herself, only has guy friend and doesn;t have time for a man because she is focused on career


I never expect the man to pay, but it usually turns out that way. - traditional


A traditional woman wants kids within wedlock, a modern woman might consider foster kids, single paranting ie baby momma or insemination as options - or forget about having children altogether

I would rather have had a child in wedlock - traditional


a traditional woman would expect to defer to a man while a modern woman would trust her own opinion first and then maybe as the man if he agrees or not and if he didn't do what she wanted to do anyway

I will make my own descisions - modern


a traditional woman likes to cook and clean and enjoys laundry and child rearing while a modern woman hires a maid, orders take out and goes to the dry cleaner

I love to cook. Taking care of a child is a blessing. But I would rather have a maid clean and do the laundry. - both


A traditional woman wants a man and does not hang out with other single male guys while a modern woman has friends of both sexes and would hang with homosexuals (f*g hags)

Gay men are fun to hang out with - modern


A traditional woman prefers monogomy while a modern woman is open to FWB or FBuddies

Monogomy for me - traditional

many women are a combination of the two I could go on and on with examples but are you getting the picture??



I'm a mixture of both, however I lean more toward the traditional side.

1/5/2013 6:07:44 PM Modern women vs Traditional women  
justcallmelater
Saint Robert, MO
59, joined Jul. 2009


Modern women aren't con artists wanting a free ride. Some chick saying what's hers is hers and what's yours is hers is not my kind of modern or traditional.

A traditional woman knows how to sew, cook and behave in the bedroom. The modern woman chooses to do things differently.

I prefer a modern woman with traditional skills.

1/5/2013 6:50:32 PM Modern women vs Traditional women  

courtney52
Branchville, SC
64, joined Jun. 2009


The last man I went out to dinner with was highly offended when I picked up the check. I was not flaunting the fact that I could afford to pay the check for the nice dinner but merely trying to show him that I was gainfully employed and expected to share expenses....never heard from him again....maybe the deal breaker was when I dumped the 100 condoms out of my purse onto the table and asked him to pick his favorite color!!! Just kidding.......he dumped me after dinner and before the condoms ..it never made it to the bedroom....and this was after chatting/skyping and emailing for 6 months until I came back to the states for the summer break from school...go figure!!!

1/5/2013 6:57:54 PM Modern women vs Traditional women  
cincere__love
Skokie, IL
32, joined Dec. 2012


Quote from creative9:
I just want to say guys that this whole gender role stuff is as confusing to us as it is to you. Some guys want to pay all the time and get mad like it is an insult to their manhood when you pull out your wallet in public. I have had it happen. Or even if you do pay they majke you slip the cash to them first so they can save face, lol!

THen others ask right up front what your assets are and try to take over your life like you're some sugar momma. . .some want to ruin your life knock you up and expect you to do it all alone. . .

I just opted out of all myself.


If a man WANTS to do the traditional thing that's perfectly fine. I tip my hat for these men BUT just like women feel that they have NO OBLIGATIONS to do ANYTHING that she DOESN'T to do men have this same right and shouldn't be frowned upon if he does. I mean not every woman acts like a woman but they'll all expect that a man acts like a gentleman and treat them like wives.

1/5/2013 8:08:44 PM Modern women vs Traditional women  
cincere__love
Skokie, IL
32, joined Dec. 2012


I've talked to older couples who've said that when they were dating they would use coupons to pay for their dates. I wouldn't even attempt such thing dating women in my age group. I would surely be laughed at and dumped.

I hear older couples say that picking a date that's somewhere free or inexpensive is a good idea. Well I have yet to meet a young lady in my age group who feels a day at the beach on a nice afternoon is a good idea. Or going to the museum which is only free on certain days in Chicago and please trust that if they found out that it being free was the reason I chose that day, again that would be the end of that date.

I hear this unwritten rule by so many stating the whoever ask for the date pays. Well I haven't met too many young women who ask for dates and for the few who have you can trust that they have no intentions on paying for the dates at all. And lets say that its a day where I just finished paying bills or just didn't have the funds for a date. Telling them you have no money is the last thing you want to do. You have to damn there come up with the perfect excuse for not being able to take them out, "Yea my grams has a dentist appointment I have to take her to. Can we rescedule for next Friday (payday)?

So again dating is much harder at my age especially when it comes to these traditional values and being a gentleman. Its almost impossible to know whether or not you're being chivilrous or setting yourself up to being used.

1/5/2013 10:49:43 PM Modern women vs Traditional women  

driver406
Over 10,000 Posts!!! (52,869)
Saint Paul, MN
65, joined Oct. 2009


I'll take traditional values every time. In my day it meant she stays at home and takes care of the house and kids. If there are no kids then she may as well work and contribute to the family treasury. It means she goes to church and the husband should be head of household. She's NOT a slave that does what she's told. All decisions should be mutual, but he's head of household. Sex between husband and wife should be permitted and actually happen regularly. She stays with him for life and she's crazy enough to believe she was put on earth to love him and that her life is better because he's in it.

Modern woman? Nauseating, man hating, completely, totally, absolutely and positively INDEPENDENT feminist who crushs the guy beneath her high heel and tries to get him to admit he likes it. She believes not in equality, but female supremacy and has to have her way all the time. The purpose of the guy is to take the blame if she's wrong and to be used and abused.

1/6/2013 3:23:48 AM Modern women vs Traditional women  

courtney52
Branchville, SC
64, joined Jun. 2009


Quote from driver406:
I'll take traditional values every time. In my day it meant she stays at home and takes care of the house and kids. If there are no kids then she may as well work and contribute to the family treasury. It means she goes to church and the husband should be head of household. She's NOT a slave that does what she's told. All decisions should be mutual, but he's head of household. Sex between husband and wife should be permitted and actually happen regularly. She stays with him for life and she's crazy enough to believe she was put on earth to love him and that her life is better because he's in it.

Modern woman? Nauseating, man hating, completely, totally, absolutely and positively INDEPENDENT feminist who crushs the guy beneath her high heel and tries to get him to admit he likes it. She believes not in equality, but female supremacy and has to have her way all the time. The purpose of the guy is to take the blame if she's wrong and to be used and abused.


And I agree with you but the men that I have come in contact with have had other expectations.I would have loved to have had a traditional marriage however my ex-husband made it very clear, after the vows, that it was a 59/50 deal...hence we are divorced and I have been independent ever since. My comment about the condoms was totally sarcastic. I would never be so bold as to do such a thing. I just think that I, as a woman, have much to bring to the table in terms of income and experience but over the years have had few diners. Living independently for me seems to be the only option at this point. I grew up in a very traditional house and my parents were married for over 60 years before my father passed away. I believe that this is the best way for people to be together.

1/6/2013 4:44:01 AM Modern women vs Traditional women  
kevin15g
Waldorf, MD
26, joined Aug. 2011


How a men could be too innocent like that one who need someone to explain him the difference between modern and traditional

1/7/2013 12:02:20 AM Modern women vs Traditional women  
creative9
San Mateo, CA
49, joined Dec. 2012


cinsere love girls your age usually want older guys with money. OR older guys with money prey upon them, because they know their own age group can't do what they can with these young women. Maybe you need to go cougar, grrrrr, lol!

As you age, you don't get as impressed with money so easily. Older people often have kids or alimony in the mix too (not me though) so they are more open to saving cash.

Myself. . .I always use coupons and do free things, just because I love nature and a bargain!



[Edited 1/7/2013 12:04:10 AM ]






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