9/22/2014 4:36:17 PM |
|
|
techgeekboy
Johannesburg
South Africa
22, joined Aug. 2014
|
I know this is stupid. but I asked if she had feelings for me? she said she cares for me as a friend. before i asked what kinda guy would be ideal or could catch her eye she said me! i asked why she said the way i think, way i am etc but now I'm confused. If you not gonna be mature about this don't comment please.
Meet singles at DateHookup.dating, we're 100% free! Join now!
|
9/22/2014 4:45:59 PM |
|
|
missamicable
Orlando, FL
56, joined Jul. 2014
|
She could be confuse or she want to develop a friendship first before a relationship.
|
9/22/2014 4:49:50 PM |
|
|
techgeekboy
Johannesburg
South Africa
22, joined Aug. 2014
|
She could be confuse or she want to develop a friendship first before a relationship.
but I feel like she doesn't want anything more. why tell me she wants a guy like me.
|
9/22/2014 4:53:31 PM |
|
|
missamicable
Orlando, FL
56, joined Jul. 2014
|
Then it sucks to be you..
If she admires your qualities, but don't want to date you it could be that she is not attracted to your physical features.
|
9/22/2014 4:54:27 PM |
|
|
techgeekboy
Johannesburg
South Africa
22, joined Aug. 2014
|
Then it sucks to be you..
If she admires your qualities, but don't want to date you it could be that she is not attracted to your physical features.
True! thanks
|
9/22/2014 5:04:43 PM |
|
|
4uijack
New Port Richey, FL
30, joined Aug. 2013
|
She's probably used to f**kin' niggas' in the dark and can't tell who you are!!
|
9/22/2014 5:07:07 PM |
|
|
techgeekboy
Johannesburg
South Africa
22, joined Aug. 2014
|
there is no medicine for retards.
|
9/22/2014 6:16:15 PM |
|
|
kartusch
Logan, UT
40, joined May. 2014
|
http://markmanson.net/f**k-yes/
|
9/22/2014 6:22:22 PM |
|
|
packersbabe920
Green Bay, WI
50, joined Jul. 2013
|
Just keep it on a friend basis
at least she says she cares for u,
as a friend so don't push it
but respect it, who knows she might
have a change of heart
|
9/22/2014 6:27:27 PM |
|
|
lucky_1million
Pewaukee, WI
48, joined Jun. 2013
|
Did you ask what were the chances of things developing into something more than just a friendship in the future?
Some people are cautious about getting involved with people who aren't going to stick around and take things seriously.
I like friendship.
That's the best part of a relationship.
Also... it's harder to develop the friendship portion of a relationship if you're always getting it on.
Sex is great too.
[Edited 9/22/2014 6:28:57 PM ]
|
9/22/2014 6:34:56 PM |
|
|
icecreamsammich
Tucker, GA
64, joined May. 2014
|
I would say to be very careful not to get attached.
It is most often a way to turn you into one of her girlfriends.
You could always kiss her at the end of the date. It isn't extreme and it still lets her know you intentions. Flowers clarify things too.
Just don't get put in the friend zone and end up listening to her tell you about the guys she is screwing.
|
9/22/2014 6:45:41 PM |
|
|
amusicluvr
Salem, OR
62, joined Nov. 2013
|
Op - She means yo aint neva gittin no sex from her.
She wants a guy who is like you in some ways...but not you. She likes one, or two, things about you, but dislikes everything else about you. Yo aint gittin nun.
[Edited 9/22/2014 6:47:17 PM ]
|
9/22/2014 6:47:00 PM |
|
|
driver406
Saint Paul, MN
63, joined Oct. 2009
|
Sounds like you're stuck in the JUST FRIENDS zone. She likes you but will not commit. Might be time to look elsewhere as you may be wasting your time with her.
|
9/22/2014 6:48:51 PM |
|
|
kartusch
Logan, UT
40, joined May. 2014
|
Means friends only I wouldn't pine after her
|
9/22/2014 7:37:48 PM |
|
|
norwegianwood64
Fort Payne, AL
51, joined Jul. 2014
|
If you really like this girl, then completely ignore her and avoid her. It will save you alot of heartache. No phone, no text, no nothing...she is dead to you.
|
9/22/2014 7:45:16 PM |
|
|
soflwill
West Palm Beach, FL
55, joined Jan. 2012
online now!
|
you're not going to like the truth but here it is: Everything about you is perfect except you don't turn her on. When women get horny they call it chemistry, and you don't do it for her. Nothing you do will change that, so unless you want to watch her get used by a bunch of dirt bags and then let her cry on your shoulder after they dump her, RUN AND DON'T TURN BACK
|
9/23/2014 1:24:48 AM |
|
|
techgeekboy
Johannesburg
South Africa
22, joined Aug. 2014
|
you're not going to like the truth but here it is: Everything about you is perfect except you don't turn her on. When women get horny they call it chemistry, and you don't do it for her. Nothing you do will change that, so unless you want to watch her get used by a bunch of dirt bags and then let her cry on your shoulder after they dump her, RUN AND DON'T TURN BACK
I don't intend staying. I have not made contact with her anymore so I think that is the best way personally.
|
9/23/2014 1:26:28 AM |
|
|
techgeekboy
Johannesburg
South Africa
22, joined Aug. 2014
|
http://markmanson.net/f**k-yes/
Spot on
|
9/23/2014 1:45:24 AM |
|
|
ladiebugg55
Redding, CA
59, joined Jun. 2012
|
Just because she isn't on the same level as you right now, doesn't mean she won't get there..as with me, it takes me time to develope those deep feelings As I Get To Know Him better..Be Patient With her, try not to pressure her or she may walk away..I know I would..I can't stand being smothered or pressured..we are all different when it comes to love..she just might be the one for you (visa versa) and worth the wait..just enjoy her company and be yourself..
|
9/23/2014 4:57:00 AM |
|
|
icecreamsammich
Tucker, GA
64, joined May. 2014
|
you're not going to like the truth but here it is: Everything about you is perfect except you don't turn her on. When women get horny they call it chemistry, and you don't do it for her. Nothing you do will change that, so unless you want to watch her get used by a bunch of dirt bags and then let her cry on your shoulder after they dump her, RUN AND DON'T TURN BACK
This is the truth.
Have some self respect and move on. Find a woman that wants you. Nothing but pain chasing that current one.
|
9/23/2014 5:06:10 AM |
|
|
twining
Anderson, SC
23, joined Jun. 2014
|
Maybe she's not ready for you two to be more just yet.
|
9/23/2014 6:18:06 AM |
|
|
soulflight
Baltimore, MD
53, joined Apr. 2014
|
I agree with the general response being given here but one thing bothers me. You can be a friend but I would advise a distant, very casual friend.
However, just because she doesn't see you that way doesn't doom her to dating "dirtbags" and crying on your shoulder over a series of bad relationships.
You may very well be a great guy but she isn't feeling it and the fact that she has not chosen you does not automatically make her incapable of making good choices. People supporting that idea are are feeding into the sour grapes attitude. She will likely have failed relationships, we all do. but those men aren't bad just because she didn't choose you.
[Edited 9/23/2014 6:19:24 AM ]
|
9/24/2014 5:31:34 AM |
|
|
gamerman17
New York, NY
28, joined Apr. 2010
|
I know this is stupid. but I asked if she had feelings for me? she said she cares for me as a friend. before i asked what kinda guy would be ideal or could catch her eye she said me! i asked why she said the way i think, way i am etc but now I'm confused. If you not gonna be mature about this don't comment please.
No question is ever stupid, you are here to gain possible insight into the situation so you may possibly become better informed.
As for the question, not knowing why she initially stated within the first lace, several factors can comes into play, from chemistry and personality wise wise even though you two are friends and on an intimate level where that attraction may or may not be in lace.
My only thought is why she questioning you in that why a friend who is supportive or whatnot would want to take that step when either he has opportunities in the past or waiting until the right time. It could also come as a shock to her that all of this is happening too soon for her. I really don't know her side of the story to give a full analysis.
Iy is best for you two to have a good talk about this and see where do you see yourself as friends in the future......gamer
|
9/24/2014 6:13:03 AM |
|
|
kushnalldat
Stone Mountain, GA
27, joined Aug. 2014
|
no attraction.
|
9/24/2014 6:18:15 AM |
|
|
candmann73
Petersburg, VA
41, joined Apr. 2014
|
the dreaded friend zone
|
9/24/2014 7:54:39 AM |
|
|
icecreamsammich
Tucker, GA
64, joined May. 2014
|
I agree with the general response being given here but one thing bothers me. You can be a friend but I would advise a distant, very casual friend.
However, just because she doesn't see you that way doesn't doom her to dating "dirtbags" and crying on your shoulder over a series of bad relationships.
You may very well be a great guy but she isn't feeling it and the fact that she has not chosen you does not automatically make her incapable of making good choices. People supporting that idea are are feeding into the sour grapes attitude. She will likely have failed relationships, we all do. but those men aren't bad just because she didn't choose you.
I think the implication is that users are dirt bags.
And over the course of dating we all run across users.
The self torture of staying close to someone in a one sided romantic attraction is the issue.
Sometimes there is no real friendship. It is romance or nothing with some. If that is the case, moving on spares pain.
|
9/24/2014 8:59:58 AM |
|
|
soulflight
Baltimore, MD
53, joined Apr. 2014
|
I get all that and agree, imbalance is a killer.
but I still think there is a trend for some people to make the assumption, at least in the early stages of acceptance, to become critical of or make negative predictions about the one who has not chosen them.
...in that regard, there are many who seem happy to reinforce the idea. I'm just not one of them.
OP should move on just be a cautious but distant friend. it is a lesson we all learn....some of us require tutoring...
[Edited 9/24/2014 9:00:37 AM ]
|
9/24/2014 9:07:31 AM |
|
|
sarahgoldsmith
Washington, DC
44, joined Jan. 2014
|
I know this is stupid. but I asked if she had feelings for me? she said she cares for me as a friend. before i asked what kinda guy would be ideal or could catch her eye she said me! i asked why she said the way i think, way i am etc but now I'm confused. If you not gonna be mature about this don't comment please.
It means she cares about u as a friend, but she doesn't think u will be a good fit for each as lovers.
|
9/24/2014 9:07:43 AM |
|
|
riderdragon8
Phoenix, AZ
33, joined Jun. 2014
|
Sounds like she enjoys having you as her AW fix... dont waste your time and energy- find a better match and if you were falling for her then set your lowest standard to that and move up
|
9/24/2014 9:12:26 AM |
|
|
sarahgoldsmith
Washington, DC
44, joined Jan. 2014
|
OP, just go on without her. Give your focus to someone that is a good fit for u, deserves u, & want to be with u. Let her go, OP. If women really want to be with u, they will make themselves available to u very easily.
Let her go & give your attention & focus to someone else.
|
9/24/2014 5:53:26 PM |
|
|
techgeekboy
Johannesburg
South Africa
22, joined Aug. 2014
|
I have stopped making contact with her. It is for the best, I mean why should I chase her around. One of those hard lessons but hey I learnt something.
|
9/24/2014 6:41:18 PM |
|
|
ladybugruth58
Patton, PA
56, joined Feb. 2014
|
op at 21 every one is confused. hell I still am at times. I know what I don't want, but not what I really want. it is confusing and that is life. Just give her some time, don't wimp out and leave, be with her and enjoy the relationship evolve.
|
9/24/2014 6:58:09 PM |
|
|
watermoon
Seattle, WA
22, joined Jun. 2014
|
lots of comments here are not accurate.
When a woman of any age says she just wants to be friends, that is a huge sign that she's not interested in investing in a more romantic relationship with you.
If she wanted to start off as friends, tand then see where it goes, i promise you she would tell you that.
[Edited 9/24/2014 6:58:56 PM ]
|
9/24/2014 7:04:52 PM |
|
|
watermoon
Seattle, WA
22, joined Jun. 2014
|
These are signs that based of expierences by others that could indicate that a girl is POSSIBLY not interested in you.
There is always obvious ways to tell whether a woman is interetsed in you or not, but sometimes it is not always to tell for men who dont always understand the opposite sex, so i provided some warning signs you should look out for when your starting to want to get to know a woman you like.
1. She doesn't answer your calls, or takes long to reply to your texts. when a woman likes a man she will always check her phone frequently to reply to you ALWAYS unless she is busy at work or school, she awlays squeeze in a short break to get back to you. If she takes hours or even a day or so to respond, this could be a major sign she is not interested.
2. She tells you shes busy Although this could be true,, a woman will always make time to spend time with the man she likes, when she is always busy and seems to fail on trying to meet with you this is a good sign that tells you shes obviously not interested.
3. Body languag! Body Language will always give us away, and just by reading a persons body language, you will be able to get an idea on how they feel about you, here are some body poses that could possibly mean shes not interested. ?Amrs crossed: Arms crossed or even legs crossed can mean she is shut off, if her legs or arms are crossed its her subconsious way of revealing tbat she is not open to you. ?No direct eye contact. when a womam likes a man she will have no problem prolonging eye contact with him. When she never looks at you in your eyes, stares at something else while talking to you, or looks away immediatley when you look her direction, this could be a sign that she doesn't want to develope anemotional bond with you, thus isn't physically attracted to you. ?Leaning away from you. When she is leaning the opposite direction from you, she is trying to avoid physical contact with you (touch). these signs could also be beacuse she is bashful as well.
4. Never laughs at your jokes. even when a guy has a bad sense of humor if she likes him, she will laugh atball his jokes, even when they arn't very funny jokes.
5. Brings up other guys When a woman starts talking about other guys comfortably around you, this sis a definite sign that she isn't careful of your feelings.
6. Doesn't tell her friends about you Although this could be hard to know, when a woman is really into a guy she will bring you up to her friends, try talking to her friends, if they dont know you or havn't heard of you, this could mean she didnt mention you to her friends, which could mean she just isn't that into you.
7. She makes it clear that you're just a friend. she may not be bold or blunt when trying to signal this to you, but she will, in some way make sure she you understand that you will only ever be a friend to her.
8. She doesn't dress up for you Women like to dress nice for the men they like, when you see her and she is almost never dressed up sexy or nice, this could mean shea not into you.
9. She doesn't do flirty things. Subconsiously women will do flirty little gestures when they like a man, like flipping her hair, laughing and smiling alot. If she doesn't do flirty cute things while your around (and trust me it is obvious tell when she is) this could mean shes not worried about your attraction towards her.
|
9/24/2014 11:57:58 PM |
|
|
luxorus
Peoria, IL
37, joined Apr. 2014
|
If she didn't answer your question, I would of responded that you were put on the back burner. She feels vulnerable, maybe because she was hurt before, or she feels that NOW there's too much to lose.
Best wishes
|
9/25/2014 9:33:28 AM |
|
|
techgeekboy
Johannesburg
South Africa
22, joined Aug. 2014
|
These are signs that based of expierences by others that could indicate that a girl is POSSIBLY not interested in you.
There is always obvious ways to tell whether a woman is interetsed in you or not, but sometimes it is not always to tell for men who dont always understand the opposite sex, so i provided some warning signs you should look out for when your starting to want to get to know a woman you like.
1. She doesn't answer your calls, or takes long to reply to your texts. when a woman likes a man she will always check her phone frequently to reply to you ALWAYS unless she is busy at work or school, she awlays squeeze in a short break to get back to you. If she takes hours or even a day or so to respond, this could be a major sign she is not interested.
2. She tells you shes busy Although this could be true,, a woman will always make time to spend time with the man she likes, when she is always busy and seems to fail on trying to meet with you this is a good sign that tells you shes obviously not interested.
3. Body languag! Body Language will always give us away, and just by reading a persons body language, you will be able to get an idea on how they feel about you, here are some body poses that could possibly mean shes not interested. ?Amrs crossed: Arms crossed or even legs crossed can mean she is shut off, if her legs or arms are crossed its her subconsious way of revealing tbat she is not open to you. ?No direct eye contact. when a womam likes a man she will have no problem prolonging eye contact with him. When she never looks at you in your eyes, stares at something else while talking to you, or looks away immediatley when you look her direction, this could be a sign that she doesn't want to develope anemotional bond with you, thus isn't physically attracted to you. ?Leaning away from you. When she is leaning the opposite direction from you, she is trying to avoid physical contact with you (touch). these signs could also be beacuse she is bashful as well.
4. Never laughs at your jokes. even when a guy has a bad sense of humor if she likes him, she will laugh atball his jokes, even when they arn't very funny jokes.
5. Brings up other guys When a woman starts talking about other guys comfortably around you, this sis a definite sign that she isn't careful of your feelings.
6. Doesn't tell her friends about you Although this could be hard to know, when a woman is really into a guy she will bring you up to her friends, try talking to her friends, if they dont know you or havn't heard of you, this could mean she didnt mention you to her friends, which could mean she just isn't that into you.
7. She makes it clear that you're just a friend. she may not be bold or blunt when trying to signal this to you, but she will, in some way make sure she you understand that you will only ever be a friend to her.
8. She doesn't dress up for you Women like to dress nice for the men they like, when you see her and she is almost never dressed up sexy or nice, this could mean shea not into you.
9. She doesn't do flirty things. Subconsiously women will do flirty little gestures when they like a man, like flipping her hair, laughing and smiling alot. If she doesn't do flirty cute things while your around (and trust me it is obvious tell when she is) this could mean shes not worried about your attraction towards her.
Some of the above signs were there but I think she is just not interested doesn't matter what I saw like today I spoke to her doesn't seem like she was bothered so
|
9/25/2014 10:02:47 AM |
|
|
ironjackcash
Longville, LA
55, joined Apr. 2014
|
I have a friend, we've dated a few times, we've had lunch together many times, she thinks more men should be like me but the last time we discussed the issue she said "I find your arrogance hilarious, but I don't find it appealing... We've known each other 30 years and still friends to this day, but friends is as far as it will ever go, Im cool with that. If she said "FRIEND", your going to have a hard time getting past it
|
9/25/2014 10:20:32 AM |
|
|
mrmajestic64
Gainesville, FL
50, joined Sep. 2014
|
Thats better then nothing aint it? And let me tell you a big secret that my old head has learned. When a woman tells you that sometimes shes testing you. If you want her bad emough you will be her friend wont you? Also maybe you where pushing it a little to hard and she needs more time to see what you are about? If you juss wanted a hit and run you will LEAVE!
Now I may be wrong but I'll stick to my story!
[Edited 9/25/2014 10:22:30 AM ]
|
9/25/2014 12:59:52 PM |
|
|
playingindirt
Eugene, OR
59, joined Mar. 2014
|
OP I believe what she's saying is though she likes the way you are and how you think but just for her personally you aren't what does it for her as a man. that's okay though because another woman will.
|
9/25/2014 4:35:56 PM |
|
|
chitowngirl78
Oak Lawn, IL
37, joined May. 2014
|
I know this is stupid. but I asked if she had feelings for me? she said she cares for me as a friend. before i asked what kinda guy would be ideal or could catch her eye she said me! i asked why she said the way i think, way i am etc but now I'm confused. If you not gonna be mature about this don't comment please.
She likes you as a person, but shes not attracted to you. This isnt Rocket Science
|
9/25/2014 4:53:56 PM |
|
|
asiancawk
Houston, TX
48, joined Sep. 2014
|
I know this is stupid. but I asked if she had feelings for me? she said she cares for me as a friend. before i asked what kinda guy would be ideal or could catch her eye she said me! i asked why she said the way i think, way i am etc but now I'm confused. If you not gonna be mature about this don't comment please.
Just ask her..."So I suppose a blowjob is out of the question?", it would be the mature thing to do.
|
9/25/2014 5:25:07 PM |
|
|
sarahgoldsmith
Washington, DC
44, joined Jan. 2014
|
lots of comments here are not accurate.
When a woman of any age says she just wants to be friends, that is a huge sign that she's not interested in investing in a more romantic relationship with you.
If she wanted to start off as friends, tand then see where it goes, i promise you she would tell you that.
U are 100% percent right. I totally agree with u. If they want to be with u, they will tell u.
If they can't be with u, they will tell u that they can't be with u. U can always ask a direct question & listen to her answer. Most women are honest about what they want. Most women won't string u along.
U can always tell if she is a gold digger. U will just feel it. Your heart will tell u she is not right for u. U will feel that it is not right. Trust your instinct, your heart, & your logic. It will try to talk to u. Your instinct & your logic will tell u when something doesn't feel right.
|
9/25/2014 5:35:14 PM |
|
|
lookin4him2012
Boone, NC
47, joined Jan. 2012
|
I know this is stupid. but I asked if she had feelings for me? she said she cares for me as a friend. before i asked what kinda guy would be ideal or could catch her eye she said me! i asked why she said the way i think, way i am etc but now I'm confused. If you not gonna be mature about this don't comment please.
she doesn't want you OPie. It's obvious to me. And if she does want you then she's just playing head games. You don't need that anyway.
|
9/25/2014 6:29:18 PM |
|
|
deeppacific
Trenton, MI
44, joined Jun. 2014
|
she got you by the ball's my friend, it's a tough situation, good luck
|
9/25/2014 7:42:49 PM |
|
|
techgeekboy
Johannesburg
South Africa
22, joined Aug. 2014
|
Not really like I said, I'm done.
|
9/25/2014 8:30:29 PM |
|
|
driver406
Saint Paul, MN
63, joined Oct. 2009
|
If you're in the JUST FRIENDS zone then she's wasting your time. DUMP HER! She's feeding you bullshit.
|