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| 6/3/2015 4:05:50 PM |
Humor For The Day |
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happyladyme
Stephens City, VA
74, joined May. 2014
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Meet singles at DateHookup.dating, we're 100% free! Join now!
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| 6/3/2015 4:08:01 PM |
Humor For The Day |
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happyladyme
Stephens City, VA
74, joined May. 2014
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| 6/4/2015 1:31:41 PM |
Humor For The Day |
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vaegood
Harrisonburg, VA
55, joined May. 2007
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Something for seniors to do to keep those "aging" gray cells active!
1. Johnny's mother had three children. The first child was named April. The second child was named May.
...What was the third child's name?
2. There is a clerk at the butcher shop, he is five feet ten inches tall and he wears size 13 sneakers
.. ...What does he weigh?
3. Before Mt. Everest was discovered,
.... what was the highest mountain in the world?
4. How much dirt is there in a hole
...that measures two feet by three feet by four feet?
5. What word in the English language
...is always spelled incorrectly?
6. Billy was born on December 28th, yet his birthday is always in the summer.
....How is this possible?
7. In California, you cannot take a picture of a man with a wooden leg.
...Why not?
8. What was the current President's name
.... in 1975?
9. If you were running a race,
...and you passed the person in 2nd place, what place would you be in now?
10. Which is correct to say,
.... "The yolk of the egg are white" or "The yolk of the egg is white"?
11. If a farmer has 5 haystacks in one field and 4 haystacks in the other field,
...how many haystacks would he have if he combined them all in another field?
Here are the Answers
1. Johnny's mother had three children. The first child was named April The second child was named May. What was the third child's name?
Answer: Johnny, of course
2. There is a clerk at the butcher shop, he is five feet ten inches tall, and he wears size 13 sneakers. What does he weigh?
Answer: Meat.
3. Before Mt. Everest was discovered, what was the highest mountain in the world?
Answer: Mt. Everest; it just wasn't discovered yet. [You're not very good at this are you?]
4. How much dirt is there in a hole that measures two feet by three feet by four feet?
Answer: There is no dirt in a hole.
5. What word in the English language is always spelled incorrectly?
Answer: Incorrectly
6. Billy was born on December 28th, yet his birthday is always in the summer. How is this possible?
Answer: Billy lives in the Southern Hemisphere
7. In California, you cannot take a picture of a man with a wooden leg. Why not?
Answer: You can 't take pictures with a wooden leg. You need a camera to take pictures.
8. What was the President's name in 1975?
Answer: Same as is it now - Barack Obama [Oh, come on.....]
9. If you were running a race, and you passed the person in 2nd place, what place would you be in now?
Answer: You would be in 2nd. Well, you passed the person in second place, not first.
10. Which is correct to say, "The yolk of the egg are white" or "The yolk of the egg is white"?
Answer: Neither, the yolk of the egg is yellow [duh!]
11. If a farmer has 5 haystacks in one field and 4 haystacks in the other field, how many haystacks would he have if he combined them all in another field?
Answer: One. If he combines all of his haystacks, they all become one big one.
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| 6/7/2015 7:23:31 AM |
Humor For The Day |
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happyladyme
Stephens City, VA
74, joined May. 2014
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| 6/8/2015 7:35:52 PM |
Humor For The Day |
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vaegood
Harrisonburg, VA
55, joined May. 2007
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 This morning, the Muslim Brotherhood warned John Kerry that if the united States continues meddling in Egypt, Libya, And now in Iraq, Syria, and Afghanistan,
they intend to cut off America's supply of 7-11 and Motel 6 managers.
If this action does not yield sufficient results, cab drivers will be next, followed by
Comcast, Dell, AT&T and AOL Customer Service reps.
Finally, if all else fails, they have threatened not to send us any more presidents!
 Folks, it's gonna get ugly-
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| 7/15/2015 7:31:21 AM |
Humor For The Day |
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vaegood
Harrisonburg, VA
55, joined May. 2007
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For those who haven't heard, Washington State recently passed two laws.
They legalized gay marriage and legalized marijuana.
The fact that gay marriage and marijuana were legalized on the same day
makes perfect Biblical sense.
Leviticus 20:13 says:
" If a man lies with another man they should be stoned."
(Apparently we just hadn't interpreted it correctly before
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| 8/11/2015 5:12:43 PM |
Humor For The Day |
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happyladyme
Stephens City, VA
74, joined May. 2014
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