| 6/29/2009 6:36:07 PM |
Hardening my heart |
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ksfreebird1983
Sycamore, KS
34, joined Dec. 2008
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I suppose its a necessary evil now. I hate to do it, I really do, but I've been cut again and really deep when I thought everything was right. Long story short She said I came on too strong and that she thought she was ready but wasnt. I wouldnt have been so strong but she gave my heart every indication she was ready for a strong relationship. So I let my heart into the ring only to find out she wasnt attracted to me at all and wasnt as mature as she claimed she was. I hate being played, lied to, and used!
The bottom line: its going to take one special person to break down my walls. I hate being that way as I care for everyone and love life and people. But I cant afford to wear my heart on my sleeves anymore because I'm tired of getting hurt. I just hope I dont turn into a butthole because I've always vowed never to do that but right now I dont know whats going to happen. I'm too upset to look to the future with any kind of optimism.
Thanks for listening
- Jamie
Fly, oh Free Bird yeah!
Meet singles at DateHookup.dating, we're 100% free! Join now!
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| 6/29/2009 6:44:24 PM |
Hardening my heart |
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ironmuscle
Santa Cruz, CA
41, joined Jun. 2008
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I suppose its a necessary evil now. I hate to do it, I really do, but I've been cut again and really deep when I thought everything was right. Long story short She said I came on too strong and that she thought she was ready but wasnt. I wouldnt have been so strong but she gave my heart every indication she was ready for a strong relationship. So I let my heart into the ring only to find out she wasnt attracted to me at all and wasnt as mature as she claimed she was. I hate being played, lied to, and used!
The bottom line: its going to take one special person to break down my walls. I hate being that way as I care for everyone and love life and people. But I cant afford to wear my heart on my sleeves anymore because I'm tired of getting hurt. I just hope I dont turn into a butthole because I've always vowed never to do that but right now I dont know whats going to happen. I'm too upset to look to the future with any kind of optimism.
Thanks for listening
- Jamie
Fly, oh Free Bird yeah!
By going to the opposite extreme it's not going to get any better. Remember what happened to the pharaoh in the Old Testament when he hardened his heart to the message of Moses? He took a huge defeat at the hands of God. Having a hard heart is not good in any situation. Instead going on the opposite extreme, you should be more cautious in who you emotionally expose yourself to.......let people take sips vs. huge guzzles.....don't expose yourself to risks prematurely.
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| 6/29/2009 7:07:12 PM |
Hardening my heart |
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happygirlri
Lincoln, RI
54, joined Jun. 2009
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Hardening your heart only makes finding that perfect treasure impossible. Every relationship we have teaches us about our next one. We learn what we will tolerate and what we will not. Having your heart broken sucks, we have all had it happen, but we all have somehow gotten through those low points and gone on. Remember there is someone out there who will be willing to climb over your walls no matter how high, because they truly love you for who you are. She is out there and worth searching for!
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| 6/29/2009 7:10:58 PM |
Hardening my heart |
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ksfreebird1983
Sycamore, KS
34, joined Dec. 2008
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And I dream that one day she will enter my life and be willing to make that climb. I really hate walls but I need them at this point. But how do I begin trusting my instincts again after this? I really feel like I cant trust even myself at this point. I think I'm going to go for a drive, maybe that will ease my mind and clear it out.
- Jamie
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| 6/29/2009 7:16:57 PM |
Hardening my heart |
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happygirlri
Lincoln, RI
54, joined Jun. 2009
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Once you decide exactly what you want and are not willing to settle, you will not question yourself as you seem to be doing.
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| 6/29/2009 8:10:22 PM |
Hardening my heart |
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pokerface_68
Springfield, OR
39, joined May. 2009
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I always thought it was a good idea to wait atleast 6 months before making a commitment that big. It gives you the oppurtunity to spend alot of time in the other persons world. So when they do get comfortable enough they will let their trueselves come out. Sometimes you will be suprised to find out it might have been the idea of them you was inlove with and not really the person anyway. Patience and time is the best way to protect your heart. Hardening it will only make you lonely and miserable. Make friends first. If the next one is the one for you she will stick around and she will show you that you are what she desires to be with. Never give too much too soon but, don't close yourself off to the idea that the woman you dream of is out there. Because she is and when you find her this woman will be nothing more than a distant memory. I hope you feel better soon. 
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| 6/29/2009 8:14:40 PM |
Hardening my heart |
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bbw47reader
Frederick, MD
55, joined Jun. 2009
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Ironmuscle has good advice^^^^^^^
It is very hard to wait and take each interaction for what it is without projecting into the future, especially when you have strong feelings. It is not necessary to build a wall that must be scaled or broken. It is only necessary to wait and see.
Whatever you do don't pray for patience!
(old 12-stepper joke - means God will grant you many opportunities to practice patience! lol)
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| 6/29/2009 8:20:23 PM |
Hardening my heart |
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spider77
Adamsville, AL
66, joined Oct. 2008
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I suppose its a necessary evil now. I hate to do it, I really do, but I've been cut again and really deep when I thought everything was right. Long story short She said I came on too strong and that she thought she was ready but wasnt. I wouldnt have been so strong but she gave my heart every indication she was ready for a strong relationship. So I let my heart into the ring only to find out she wasnt attracted to me at all and wasnt as mature as she claimed she was. I hate being played, lied to, and used!
The bottom line: its going to take one special person to break down my walls. I hate being that way as I care for everyone and love life and people. But I cant afford to wear my heart on my sleeves anymore because I'm tired of getting hurt. I just hope I dont turn into a butthole because I've always vowed never to do that but right now I dont know whats going to happen. I'm too upset to look to the future with any kind of optimism.
Thanks for listening
- Jamie
Fly, oh Free Bird yeah!
When you walk through a cow pasture trying to get to the other side, you'll make it, to cross through the fence, but you may have stepped in it many many times, till success is achieved. JMO
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| 6/29/2009 8:23:59 PM |
Hardening my heart |
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avalondreams
Poulsbo, WA
57, joined Jun. 2009
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ksfreebird,
I hear ya loud and clear, and that's all I am going to say,
keep the chin up and I will too.
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| 6/29/2009 8:49:02 PM |
Hardening my heart |
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awakeing
Walled Lake, MI
45, joined Mar. 2008
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It's takes doing that to give yourself time to heal.
The key is not staying hard. I understand it takes great pain
to cause one to even want to harden their heart.
Only harden it with the one who hurt you. It's ok to need to protect
yourself from that person but don't punish everyone else with a hard
heart or you become just like the person who hurt you.
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| 6/29/2009 9:00:30 PM |
Hardening my heart |
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suzeq103
Leesburg, VA
61, joined Apr. 2009
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Freebird,
I am so sorry to see that your heart has been broken. Over the course of my lifetime, my heart has been cruely crushed, but we eventually come back when someone walks into our life and makes us feel again. You are young and the potential for your heart to be broken again is possible, I am sorry to say. One way to look at it is that you know that you have loved and you can feel, when the pain comes. I have recently met 2 very nice gentlemen. One doesn't make my heart sing and the other does. Figures the one that does, has let me go. Hang on, have hope and keep your eyes open. We do not know when the person placed in our path is the one for us.
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| 6/29/2009 9:02:26 PM |
Hardening my heart |
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tater79
Springfield, IL
38, joined Jun. 2008
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By going to the opposite extreme it's not going to get any better. Remember what happened to the pharaoh in the Old Testament when he hardened his heart to the message of Moses? He took a huge defeat at the hands of God. Having a hard heart is not good in any situation. Instead going on the opposite extreme, you should be more cautious in who you emotionally expose yourself to.......let people take sips vs. huge guzzles.....don't expose yourself to risks prematurely.
  Good anwser and example...
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| 6/29/2009 9:11:06 PM |
Hardening my heart |
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smithbrent41
Richardson, TX
37, joined Jun. 2009
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it's a good idea to harden your heart . if you are too nice to them they will think that something wrong with you . play their game and try not to show that you care about them. when they call tell them you are on the phone with someone and you'll call right back . they do like bad boys , so be one.
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| 6/29/2009 9:40:15 PM |
Hardening my heart |
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firstlight
Strasburg, VA
57, joined Feb. 2008
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Jamie,
I don't know you except for your postings but I don't think you have it in you to harden your heart. And thank goodness for that. I do think that (from your postings, again) you may be a little too eager to fall in love and therefore are trying to make it happen.
The next time you meet someone of interest, I want you to show a little restraint. Let the idea of "this is the one" and all the other romantic notions your soft heart dreams about idle in the chill zone while you get to know her as a friend and a person.
You don't have to be a bad boy as some would suggest or a dog, but neither do you have to be a puppy.
You are a smart young man, I am confident you will figure it out.
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| 6/29/2009 10:13:45 PM |
Hardening my heart |
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ksfreebird1983
Sycamore, KS
34, joined Dec. 2008
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Well I do feel better but there is some pain down inside of me. I guess its from the remains of a once grand heart. Its pretty much shattered into a million pieces. But at least I left with all of them and I can put it back together again. Its just going to take time and a lot of TLC to get it back to where it was before it was shattered. Until it is well again and I know that I can love again its going to have walls around it. I dont need another breaking when its just going back together again.
I'm not going to shut the idea of love out its just going to take a bit longer and a lot more giving from the other party before I'll try it again. At least I know what I want now and its definitely not someone who needs to be asked if she loves me, she will come out and say it.
In the meantime I'll stay single and quit looking till I am recovered. But knowing my luck someone will try and get in during the healing and I'm going to pray that she gets my whole heart and not pieces of it. Should I let her in during my healing?
- Jamie
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| 6/29/2009 10:59:26 PM |
Hardening my heart |
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midnightgambler
Memphis, TN
40, joined Nov. 2008
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Hardening the heart isn't good. Opposite is bad also. But people are people. Honestly I'm tired of people telling me I need to change and I need to harden mine too blah blah blah. Of course the more females who are evil... does make me naturally trust a little less often though.
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| 6/30/2009 1:10:30 AM |
Hardening my heart |
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33mopower
Athol, ID
38, joined Jun. 2009
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This is just my thought and it may be way off base. Judging from your posts and profile I would say this was your first serious relationship(maybe even lost your virginity to her). You can't force things or rush them.Just because she had sex with you doesn't mean she loves you and wants to spend the rest of her life with you.
You have learned one of the first rules to relationships and thats don't jump in head first. You need to take things slow! If after six months she is still around then you can start to let her in slowly. There are players of both sexes that use other people. If she is willing to work at it then maybe things could work out. If you are doing all the work and getting very little in return watch out.
Being a pessimist is not all bad because if you don't think the relationship will ultimately work out then its easier to enjoy it while you have it. enjoy today for today and late fate handle tomorrow.
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| 6/30/2009 1:14:37 AM |
Hardening my heart |
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rodneyg668
Seattle, WA
44, joined Jan. 2008
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This might sound rough, but it's honest. If you close your heart to others then all you'll get is lonely, if you close yourself off and lock yourself away then you are going to get exactly what you are asking for, which is nothing. I understand about heartbreak, but walling yourself off is certainly not the way to solve it, you can't heal that way.
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| 6/30/2009 1:15:41 AM |
Hardening my heart |
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in_doubtalishis
Beaumont, CA
42, joined Oct. 2008
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| 6/30/2009 2:21:28 AM |
Hardening my heart |
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photodude111
Sedona, AZ
53, joined Jan. 2009
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First off thanks for the video michelle, I love that band.
Jamie my man, that happens, don't turn off yourself because someone played you, stay open. I met someone last year, we were just starting to get to know each other and one day she just stop talking to me.
I retired from dating to the forums where i just started writing. In late January I met the most amazing woman right here on this site. She is everything that I thought I wanted and a few things that i had no idea.
When the time is right it will happen for you.
Good luck
Karl in Sedona
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| 6/30/2009 6:36:22 AM |
Hardening my heart |
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ksfreebird1983
Sycamore, KS
34, joined Dec. 2008
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Thanks guys for all the advice. This isnt the first time this has happened but it hit the hardest so maybe I'll learn from it. I'm pretty stubborn sometimes and it sometimes takes a hard hit to help me realize that the way I go about things isnt the best. My heart is still broke but after resting and doing a lot of thinking late last night I know that its repairable in due time. I can come away from this with a hard life's lesson. I believe those are the most important and can help you on your course through life.
You're right, I dont want to harden my heart, I just dont want to go all in. I've got so much to learn here in the game of love and I hope I dont have to go through more hard life's lessons like this one.
This has allowed me to look inside and see that I need help here. Maybe I wasnt as ready as I thought I was. I'm thinking about taking a break for anywhere between 1-3 months. Good idea or nay?
I'm re-evaluating my needs in a partner and I hope I can get them all sorted out so the next time someone comes along I can be better equipped. I know I shouldnt settle but I dont want to be so set in stone with all my needs that I miss my special someone. So there has got to be a happy medium there.
Anyway keep the advice coming! I'm absorbing it like a sponge at this point during my healing.
- Jamie
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| 6/30/2009 9:14:12 AM |
Hardening my heart |
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wolfi
Albuquerque, NM
52, joined Jan. 2008
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Let me translate:
'You came on too strong and she wasn't ready' = She wants to f**k someone else.
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| 6/30/2009 9:26:40 AM |
Hardening my heart |
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th6231
Point Pleasant Beach, NJ
70, joined Jul. 2007
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Jamie--don't take this wrong---this is my idea on this--YOU are capable of writing a nice description of what happened--we do get the picture. And YES--it hurts---it hurts anyone to go thru what you go thru. BUT GET OVER IT--SKIP THE DRAMA---stop wallowing in this bad "AFTER SCHOOL SPECIAL"---if you react this way--it tells me you probably are this way with the women---then they get tired of being nauseous. At 25 years old--you have way to many story plots to your life. You better take some time off-- go have some fun--reconsider how you interact with women---and then try again later. YOU BUILT THE WALLS--YOU ARE DOING THIS TO YOURSELF---Knock it off. You will be a lonely, bitter man if you don't change--thats my opinion. Life has no guarantees--no promises---you are the one who determines how things go in your life. If you harden your heart--then you do it by "your own choice"--well that attitude sucks. I work a job dealing with death and injury--everyday--all day and night---thats REAL LIFE--not this pansy crap you are whining about. Knock it off. Thanks for listening--Good luck to you.
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| 6/30/2009 9:51:01 AM |
Hardening my heart |
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peteredout
Valencia, CA
65, joined Mar. 2009
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Heart-hardening is a defense mechanism. It hurts when love isn't reciprocal. But be honest... the feeling of being in love is GREAT! Who wouldn't want to have that feeling in their life (heart) as much as possible? 
I say, love the next one with all your heart... and the next one... and the next one. Eventually, one will love you back with all her heart too. 
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| 6/30/2009 10:05:33 AM |
Hardening my heart |
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happylisa
Broken Arrow, OK
51, joined Jan. 2009
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Personally, Ive been through a few relationships that didnt work and the one that has worked out the best for me is the current one. The one where I just didnt dive in first thing after seeing him. We were friends first for a few months and we got to know each other. We exercised together. After those few months, I showed interest in dating him and we went out on a date and we've been together since. We both have our barriers but we both know that in the end, we want to be with each other and the longer we are together, the barriers keep fading away. So, my advice is to be patient and not rush into things. Get to know them as a friend first and see if that is a person that you can date. Rushing into things just cause you're in love with the idea of being in love always ends up in heartache whether it be 2 months or 2 years.
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| 6/30/2009 11:12:25 AM |
Hardening my heart |
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peteredout
Valencia, CA
65, joined Mar. 2009
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^^^ Pssst... guys are usually in the "friend zone" for a reason... 
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| 6/30/2009 11:37:30 AM |
Hardening my heart |
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lyxdeslic
Orange Park, FL
43, joined May. 2009
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The bottom line: its going to take one special person to break down my walls. I hate being that way as I care for everyone and love life and people. But I cant afford to wear my heart on my sleeves anymore because I'm tired of getting hurt. I just hope I dont turn into a butthole because I've always vowed never to do that but right now I dont know whats going to happen. I'm too upset to look to the future with any kind of optimism.
It's always best to make an innocent person pay for what someone else did in the past.
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| 6/30/2009 2:51:50 PM |
Hardening my heart |
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ksfreebird1983
Sycamore, KS
34, joined Dec. 2008
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You know what? I've always been the kind of person that pushes forward no matter what and I firmly believe that making my next girl pay for what a past one has done isnt the thing to do. I offered my heart to a girl, it got hurt, but its her loss not mine. I want to have an open heart for the next woman that comes into my life. I guess in the long run it wasnt as shattered as I thought it was, just cut and cuts heal better than shatters. Either way its all intact and needs a little TLC to be as good as new.
So yeah the next girl that comes into my life is going to get a whole heart, not a patched up broken one. She deserves no less than my best.
- Jamie
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| 6/30/2009 5:06:43 PM |
Hardening my heart |
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foxy_woman_49
Omaha, NE
59, joined Nov. 2007
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Reminds me of the song Gonna harden my heart ..would play it but its disabled in youtube
Cryin' on the corner
Waitin' in the rain
I swear I'll never ever wait again
You gave me a word
But words for you are lies
Darlin' in my wildest dreams
I never thought I'd go
But its time to let you know
Chorus:
I'm gonna harden my heart
I'm gonna swallow my tears
I'm gonna turn and leave you here.....
All of my life
I've been waitin' in the rain
I've been waitin' for a feelin' that never ever came
It feels so close
But always disappears
Darlin' in your wildest dreams
You never had a clue
But its time you got the news
Chorus
Guitar solo
Darlin' in my wildest dreams
I never thought I'd go
But its time to let you know
Chorus
I'm gonna harden my heart
I'm gonna swallow my tears
I'm gonna harden my heart
I'm gonna swallow my tears
Harden my heart
I'm gonna swallow my tears
Oh oh oh oh
Harden my heart
I'm gonna harden my heart
I'm gonna swallow my tears
Found it!!
[Edited 6/30/2009 5:09:34 PM ]
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| 6/30/2009 9:47:22 PM |
Hardening my heart |
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hugsnlaughter
McKeesport, PA
57, joined Jul. 2007
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I used to love that song Foxy, I need to harden my heart, I tend to have a harsh exterior but inside I'm soft.
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| 7/2/2009 8:52:35 AM |
Hardening my heart |
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coneygal54
North Brunswick, NJ
63, joined May. 2008
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Thst song speaks volumes...........Stay Strong dont let this bring you down.
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| 7/2/2009 11:19:03 AM |
Hardening my heart |
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windfall09
Greeley, CO
55, joined Jun. 2009
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The thing is Freebird, broken hearts are just part of life, every one goes through it, some more than others. If hardening your heart helps you, then it's a process. But I have found hearts don't have an off and on switch, especially if you have a good one. And typically hardening your heart only means that you hold onto to anger, resentment, disappointment,and blame. It will eat you up from the inside out far worse than a broken heart. Your damaging yourself.
The other thing is that to grow and be better and truly free, you have to take your own responsibility in things. It takes two. No matter how bad a person treats you...at the very least you chose to stay. It is NOT very often that some thing sneaks up on you, lies, deceit, what ever...there are always warning signs that for our own reasons we choose to ignore. Taking responsibility for ourselves is tough love, but it frees us. It takes us out of being the perpetual victim, and into taking back our control. It teaches us what not to do, if we are smart and use the information. Did you come on to strong? Evaluate, it will make more successful and happy.
I've been in relationships that when I looked back, I never should of been in in the first place...what was I thinking! But in time...I found for the most part that in each one there was good with the bad. I learned some thing, I laughed at some thing, they gave me some thing.
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| 7/2/2009 5:29:29 PM |
Hardening my heart |
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the_engineer
Mesa, AZ
52, joined May. 2009
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Go with getting your heart stomped brother, preferably numerous times. It's a big step towards becoming "more than human". Once you get there you'll discover what all this nonsense with bad relatonships has all been about. If this idea intrigues you then read some Nietzsche and go rent Cape Fear or Fight Club.
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| 7/2/2009 6:04:13 PM |
Hardening my heart |
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wsprs0nthewind
Powell, TN
53, joined Mar. 2009
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it's a good idea to harden your heart . if you are too nice to them they will think that something wrong with you . play their game and try not to show that you care about them. when they call tell them you are on the phone with someone and you'll call right back . they do like bad boys , so be one.
Better yet, when the guy you are talking to asks you to hold on a moment while he takes another call....hang up on his ass. If I am on hold longer than a minute I'm gone. My time is valuable and I won't be hanging around waiting on a guy to talk to me when there are plenty others out there that will. There's always another bus leaving in 20 minutes and NO guy is worth wasting your tears over.
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| 7/3/2009 5:59:44 AM |
Hardening my heart |
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the_fig
El Paso, TX
47, joined Oct. 2008
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Reminds me of the song Gonna harden my heart ..would play it but its disabled in youtube
Cryin' on the corner
Waitin' in the rain
I swear I'll never ever wait again
You gave me a word
But words for you are lies
Darlin' in my wildest dreams
I never thought I'd go
But its time to let you know
Chorus:
I'm gonna harden my heart
I'm gonna swallow my tears
I'm gonna turn and leave you here.....
All of my life
I've been waitin' in the rain
I've been waitin' for a feelin' that never ever came
It feels so close
But always disappears
Darlin' in your wildest dreams
You never had a clue
But its time you got the news
Chorus
Guitar solo
Darlin' in my wildest dreams
I never thought I'd go
But its time to let you know
Chorus
I'm gonna harden my heart
I'm gonna swallow my tears
I'm gonna harden my heart
I'm gonna swallow my tears
Harden my heart
I'm gonna swallow my tears
Oh oh oh oh
Harden my heart
I'm gonna harden my heart
I'm gonna swallow my tears
Found it!!
WOW, foxywoman. YOU READ MY MIND! 
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| 7/3/2009 10:47:45 AM |
Hardening my heart |
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ksfreebird1983
Sycamore, KS
34, joined Dec. 2008
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Well I'm glad I didnt harden my heart. I met someone the other day and she is everything that I've ever wanted in a woman and then some. We pretty much fell for each other right off the bat but we are taking things slow because we want it to be perfect. I believe in miracles and the good lord above has provided me with one. We've already spent a couple days together and we're spending the weekend together and the better part of next week and looking toward the future with high hopes.
Her family is a very big part of her life and her dad already told her not to let me go when I took her little boy to the restroom. I love her little boy just as much as I do her.
So dont harden your heart or you could miss your meant to be while you are hiding anger and sorrow inside. I'm sure glad I didnt or I would have missed this wonderful woman's love and possibly my future!
Thanks guys for listening!
- Jamie
[Edited 7/3/2009 10:48:28 AM ]
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| 7/3/2009 9:47:33 PM |
Hardening my heart |
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angelfire65
Mountain Home, AR
52, joined Apr. 2009
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I understand that OP...It can be awfully tempting but difficult to do. I have tried to do it over and over and have failed miserably every time. All I can do is be myself and hope like hell I don't keep getting hurt. It's not like I enjoy it but I simply don't know how to harden my heart.
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| 7/3/2009 10:02:21 PM |
Hardening my heart |
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bellbottomblues
Waukegan, IL
64, joined Jan. 2009
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I do ice water IVs once A day.
Keeps me from giving A shit about anything ! 
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| 7/4/2009 12:32:23 AM |
Hardening my heart |
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k0011brz
Dallas, TX
47, joined Feb. 2009
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WELL,I AM A 39 YR MAN AND THATS WHAT I HAVE DONE.I HAVE HARDEN MY HEART TOWARDS A WOMAN LOOKING FOR A RELATIONSHIP.ON THE OTHER HAND IF SHE WANTS SOME NSA SOMETHING ELSE WILL HARDEN.....LOL...BUT YEA I WAS MARRIED AND I THOUGHT IT WAS GOING TO BE FOREVER AS I SEE MY PARENTS STILL TOGETHER AFTER 40 YRS...RIGHT NOW I DONT WANT NO LUVVY DUBBY JUST CANT TRUST A WOMAN.I AM JUST TRYING TO BETTER MYSELF AND CONCENTRATE ON MY FAMILIA 
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| 7/4/2009 12:43:59 AM |
Hardening my heart |
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k0011brz
Dallas, TX
47, joined Feb. 2009
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HEY MIDNIGHTGAMBLER,GOT YOUR HAND SUPERGLUED TO THE SIDE OF YOUR FACE???
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| 7/4/2009 12:48:01 AM |
Hardening my heart |
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kgearly1021
Reidsville, GA
57, joined Dec. 2007
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WELL,I AM A 39 YR MAN AND THATS WHAT I HAVE DONE.I HAVE HARDEN MY HEART TOWARDS A WOMAN LOOKING FOR A RELATIONSHIP.ON THE OTHER HAND IF SHE WANTS SOME NSA SOMETHING ELSE WILL HARDEN.....LOL...BUT YEA I WAS MARRIED AND I THOUGHT IT WAS GOING TO BE FOREVER AS I SEE MY PARENTS STILL TOGETHER AFTER 40 YRS...RIGHT NOW I DONT WANT NO LUVVY DUBBY JUST CANT TRUST A WOMAN.I AM JUST TRYING TO BETTER MYSELF AND CONCENTRATE ON MY FAMILIA
HEY MIDNIGHTGAMBLER,GOT YOUR HAND SUPERGLUED TO THE SIDE OF YOUR FACE???
Could you keep the yelling down to a minimum? The babies are asleep.
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| 7/4/2009 1:51:21 AM |
Hardening my heart |
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john346
Riverdale, GA
45, joined Apr. 2009
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I suppose its a necessary evil now. I hate to do it, I really do, but I've been cut again and really deep when I thought everything was right. Long story short She said I came on too strong and that she thought she was ready but wasnt. I wouldnt have been so strong but she gave my heart every indication she was ready for a strong relationship. So I let my heart into the ring only to find out she wasnt attracted to me at all and wasnt as mature as she claimed she was. I hate being played, lied to, and used!
The bottom line: its going to take one special person to break down my walls. I hate being that way as I care for everyone and love life and people. But I cant afford to wear my heart on my sleeves anymore because I'm tired of getting hurt. I just hope I dont turn into a butthole because I've always vowed never to do that but right now I dont know whats going to happen. I'm too upset to look to the future with any kind of optimism.
Thanks for listening
- Jamie
Fly, oh Free Bird yeah!
Stop being naive. I have told you numerous times that 90% of those outh there are fickle, deceptive, and lack a sense of self. Since most people are this way, why should you expect anything more out of them?? Garbage in garbage out. 90% of those out there are garbage human beings. Since when does any rational person like you start expecting great things from garbage??
You should learn by now that garbage should be thrown out after use. So, your incessant complain about garbage is frankly becoming annoying. Over 60% of those on these forums are here to have sex if they can meet the right person to do so. Many have no idea what love really means because they did not get real love when they were growing up. so, all they know is infatuation.
So stop wasting your time with seeking reality here. even i have been disappointed with some people on these forums and al i did was shake my head and take it with a pinch of salt. You can't change garbage. So, stop pulling your hair out because garbage behaved exactly the way garbage should behave.
Only a very tiny percentage of people are here for the real deal. Unfortunately, their numbers are too small to be significant in effect.
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| 7/4/2009 2:01:26 AM |
Hardening my heart |
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sundanceforu
Grantsburg, WI
46, joined Jun. 2009
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Did u by chance use a off Market Hardener
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| 7/4/2009 2:22:11 AM |
Hardening my heart |
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larebel
Kentwood, LA
60, joined May. 2008
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Hi for awhile after two divorces both ended because of there running around while I would be off working out of state makeing a good life for the two of us and a couple of failed relationships after that My heart was getting pretty hard and my trust towards any woman that I would try to get involved with in a relationship was doomed before it would ever have a chance because of my hard heart and complete lack of trust in women. But I,m older and wiser now and have come to realize that the Hard Heart is really hurting me . so I,ve let it soften back up and come to the conclusion that when the right one comes along If it is to be it will be and start out by trusting her until she gives me a reason not too! I laugh at things that used to upset me such as breaking up I went from fixing to get married to my last girlfriend 3 months ago Too me getting back home off of a job and Getting a Text message that she did,nt want to see each other anymore and it was her that was trying too push the wedding forward before I left on that job. And I thought it was funny as hell I,ve never been Dumped with a Text before.So all we can do is keep our Hearts soft and open and someday the right one will come along!!
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| 7/6/2009 9:14:53 PM |
Hardening my heart |
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ksfreebird1983
Sycamore, KS
34, joined Dec. 2008
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I got dumped by a text many times, and today was no different. But for some reason it didnt bother me as much. She was wonderful but she decided she wasnt ready for a relationship because she wanted her freedom. I could take a break but for some reason I want to push on. I'm learning that I dont want my heart hardened but its protected until I can feel inside that she is the right one for me. I wont give up my caring nature just because its protected. I've learned that you can be caring and loving without having to get hurt.
That is probably one of the greatest life's lessons there is to learn right there. Be cautious but have an open heart. It is only with an open heart that you can find love.
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| 7/7/2009 9:56:06 AM |
Hardening my heart |
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bamalady57
Lake Panasoffkee, FL
60, joined Jun. 2009
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forgiving is key word here , hard but true just forgive and go on sweetie good luck.
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