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1/16/2011 10:21:06 PM Woman Knocked Up By Dead Man  
ole_trucker
Over 1,000 Posts (1,144)
Collingswood, NJ
69, joined Sep. 2010


If this is not a joke, and even if the legal action starts and a judge dismisses it, it points out how deranged and insane lawyers are.

=================








Woman Knocked Up By Dead Man Seeks Child Support - Now This Is Truly Bizarre
Dead man in mortuary impregnates woman

November 11, 2010 by Dead Serious News

Dead Man

The Rolling Stones said it best, "You, you make a dead man cum." A 38 year old female mortuary worker is being held on $250,000 bond after becoming pregnant by one of her clients-a dead man. The alleged crime took place at the Mourning Glory Mortuary just outside of Lexington, Missouri. Police have charged Felicity Marmaduke with desecration of the dead and necrophilia.

According to a statement made to police by Marmaduke, the alleged victim experienced a post mortem erection while being bathed. Being alone, Marmaduke straddled the dead man and proceeded to have sex with him. Much to her surprise, the corpse had an orgasm after several minutes. Reasoning that if the man was dead so were his sperm Marmaduke douched, took a shower and forgot about it.

A few weeks later, during a routine medical exam Marmaduke had a positive pregnancy test. Upon telling her doctor the circumstances leading to the conception, the police were notified. Marmaduke was arrested without incident at her dilapidated trailer home a few blocks from the mortuary.

In a bizarre twist, Marmaduke plans to sue the dead man's estate for child support.

Marmaduke's attorney said he was looking into the possibility of the fetus inheriting from his father, the corpse.

http://jbo-bizarrestuff.blogspot.com/2011/01/woman-knocked-up-by-dead-man-seeks.html?zx=a9122c1b0ae26223



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1/16/2011 11:54:45 PM Woman Knocked Up By Dead Man  
walks_alone_42
Asheville, NC
73, joined Jan. 2011


That is bizarre!!

1/17/2011 8:26:44 AM Woman Knocked Up By Dead Man  
ole_trucker
Over 1,000 Posts (1,144)
Collingswood, NJ
69, joined Sep. 2010


Ya think!

1/17/2011 1:25:58 PM Woman Knocked Up By Dead Man  
49sunshine
Belleville, MI
57, joined Jan. 2008


YUK!!!! That is realllllly sick!!

1/17/2011 1:49:12 PM Woman Knocked Up By Dead Man  
nyguitar77
Over 1,000 Posts (1,318)
Dumfries, VA
38, joined Nov. 2008


How is that even physically possible for a corpse to have an erection? You would need a beating heart to pump blood.

Side note - The fact that her name was "Marmaduke" is just freakin funny if you're familiar w/ the comic!

1/17/2011 2:25:42 PM Woman Knocked Up By Dead Man  
ole_trucker
Over 1,000 Posts (1,144)
Collingswood, NJ
69, joined Sep. 2010


Some folks just need to LEARN to read.

"According to a statement made to police by Marmaduke, the alleged victim experienced a post mortem erection while being bathed. Being alone, Marmaduke straddled the dead man and proceeded to have sex with him. Much to her surprise, the corpse had an orgasm after several minutes. Reasoning that if the man was dead so were his sperm Marmaduke douched, took a shower and forgot about it."



1/17/2011 3:09:00 PM Woman Knocked Up By Dead Man  
nyguitar77
Over 1,000 Posts (1,318)
Dumfries, VA
38, joined Nov. 2008


Quote from ole_trucker:
Some folks just need to LEARN to read.

"According to a statement made to police by Marmaduke, the alleged victim experienced a post mortem erection while being bathed. Being alone, Marmaduke straddled the dead man and proceeded to have sex with him. Much to her surprise, the corpse had an orgasm after several minutes. Reasoning that if the man was dead so were his sperm Marmaduke douched, took a shower and forgot about it."



Hmmmm....."Post Mortem" = Autopsy = they cut you open = DEAD
"Marmaduke straddled the DEAD MAN" = DEAD
"Corpse" = DEAD

I can't read?

1/17/2011 9:57:16 PM Woman Knocked Up By Dead Man  
ole_trucker
Over 1,000 Posts (1,144)
Collingswood, NJ
69, joined Sep. 2010


RIGGER-MORTIS?



1/17/2011 10:03:02 PM Woman Knocked Up By Dead Man  
madame58
Over 1,000 Posts (1,195)
Burnsville, MN
67, joined Oct. 2010


you make this stuff up dontcha

1/18/2011 12:59:24 AM Woman Knocked Up By Dead Man  
beg4merci
Detroit, MI
27, joined Jan. 2011


honestly... she admitted to a doctor she screwed a dead guy?

I wonder if they could claim the estate though. that'd be cool for the crazy lady's zombie baby

1/20/2011 9:00:38 PM Woman Knocked Up By Dead Man  

george1965
Over 10,000 Posts!!! (12,503)
Bedford, VA
50, joined May. 2010




1/20/2011 9:10:08 PM Woman Knocked Up By Dead Man  

d_voted
Over 2,000 Posts (3,993)
Winnipeg, MB
63, joined Sep. 2008


I am not sure why I read this thread.

D <<< Duh

1/20/2011 9:24:13 PM Woman Knocked Up By Dead Man  

shadygirl13
Lincoln, NE
44, joined Jun. 2010


This is so fake. A dead body can't have an orgasm. Where did you read this? The Onion?

1/20/2011 10:26:15 PM Woman Knocked Up By Dead Man  
blackjack007
Callahan, FL
37, joined Nov. 2008


I have see where they have taken sperm form dead guys. So their mate could have a baby by them. This may have happen too. There was a mortuary worker,that I knew who told me about how the bodys would sometime sit up on their on.Also this is not the only time somebody has got in trouble for rape of a dead person. I know a few years back,some guys were looking in the newspaper and seen a dead woman picture. They saying to each other she was hot and how good she looked. They went and dug her up to have sex with her. The police found the guys with her body and there were used rubbers all around.

1/21/2011 6:28:08 PM Woman Knocked Up By Dead Man  

robtest
Over 10,000 Posts!!! (26,785)
Norcross, GA
55, joined Sep. 2008




2/2/2011 6:20:33 PM Woman Knocked Up By Dead Man  
uprooted
East Rochester, NY
50, joined Apr. 2008


Frankly, I am not surprised to read this at all.
It just shows the depths of sickness that each one
of us is capable of reaching with out even trying.
What WILL surprise me is, if there is a judge in this
uber-liberal court system that is in place today that won't
give this twisted woman what she seeks.

Question: How long was the stiff stiff before he got stiff?

2/2/2011 7:20:21 PM Woman Knocked Up By Dead Man  

ayon79
Chicago, IL
36, joined Apr. 2009


OMG! gross..

2/5/2011 2:36:22 PM Woman Knocked Up By Dead Man  
custodialdad
Over 4,000 Posts! (4,136)
Monroe, WA
54, joined Jan. 2011


It is theoretically possible for a post-mortem erection to occur, with discharge of prostatic fluid, though an actual orgasm is unlikely. Still, that fluid could contain viable sperm if the man ejaculated recently before death.

While one can't generally legally profit from a crime, the child, in this case, would be an innocent victim and entitled to support from the deceased estate: she goes to jail, the kid gets support (from BOTH parents).

2/7/2011 9:36:03 PM Woman Knocked Up By Dead Man  

boughtback
Rock Rapids, IA
57, joined Jul. 2010


Kind of sounds like an old Alice Cooper song.

2/8/2011 11:33:26 AM Woman Knocked Up By Dead Man  
linsieleigh1977
Over 10,000 Posts!!! (15,067)
Redding, CA
38, joined Sep. 2010


Seriously.. WTF is wrong with ppl??? She must be really sick in the head to do that to a corpse!!!