| 1/26/2013 1:56:18 AM |
Profession hinders love |
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hsin92130
San Diego, CA
32, joined Jan. 2013
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How many of you have issues being in relationships for professional reasons?
The issues I deal with are constant travels, secrecy(work related), and girls being intimidated by what I do.
Is there anyone out there who is facing the same issues? Are there any girls who would like to give their input?
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| 1/26/2013 10:44:30 AM |
Profession hinders love |
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jrbogie1949
Ventura, CA
68, joined Mar. 2009
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over the years i've heard several folks speak of their work related secrecy and i've come to think that anybody who brings up his work related secrecy has nothing secret about his work. my guess is that your hindered love life comes more from uncalled for embelishment than travel, secrets or intimidation. c'mon, man, you can come up with a better pick up line than that. i use, 'scuse me mam but i think i dropped my congressional medal of honor. may i look under your bar stool?' doesn't work any better than your col. fragg [remember mash?] act but at least the gals get a laugh.
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| 1/26/2013 12:21:40 PM |
Profession hinders love |
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karrpilot
Oswego, IL
54, joined Jul. 2009
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I don't worry about work related secrecy. I would worry about being transferred. Or stuck on the night shift.
Which is why i go to work, do my job, and socialize afterwards. NOT at my job.
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| 1/26/2013 12:57:30 PM |
Profession hinders love |
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largotha
Lancaster, PA
34, joined Dec. 2008
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You know I can't talk about my job either. Once I put the cape and mask on noone really cares about the man underneath the suit >.>
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| 1/26/2013 1:40:26 PM |
Profession hinders love |
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hsin92130
San Diego, CA
32, joined Jan. 2013
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You're totally entitled to your opinion but I do work with a defense contractor and with everything being slapped with either a clearance or a NDA to be signed, I don't think this is uncalled for.
I don't go around meeting women and telling them that my life is a big secret. It's once in the relationship and unable to take a call because my phone was to be left behind and wasn't allowed inside a building etc... that causes issues.
As far as intimidation is concerned, men are intimidated by women with successful careers or in position of power. I believe in is the other way around as well. I have no great position of power or a "successful"(yet) career, but I have been by friends when women stayed away just because they didn't know what to talk about.
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| 1/26/2013 2:12:19 PM |
Profession hinders love |
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largotha
Lancaster, PA
34, joined Dec. 2008
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My buddy works for Ratheon Defense, the biggest defense contracted company in the US. He never had a problem talking to women or anyone else for that matter. The last big project he was working on that he could indulge was a guidance system for a new SCUD missile. Personally I've worked on projects that involved the President and large scale movements of soldiers around the world. I don't have problems socializing with women or anyone else either. Maybe the problem is just your hiding behind your own inability to socialize in general , putting yourself on a higher tiered plain to make yourself feel better about it. They have counseling for that.
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| 1/26/2013 3:18:15 PM |
Profession hinders love |
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karrpilot
Oswego, IL
54, joined Jul. 2009
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Can't call your lady? Big deal. I can't call mind during the day either. So what? Are you dating Klingons?
Back in the no cell phone days, unless it was an emergency, and it had better be one, i couldn't call out then either.
I just let every call go to voice mail, and check / respond to them after my day is done. On MY time. NOT the companys time. Since i am paid from punch in to punch out, all my time there is their time.
This is what i signed up for. This is what i do. And everyone knows it.
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| 1/26/2013 3:58:05 PM |
Profession hinders love |
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bier95
Clara City, MN
66, joined May. 2011
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It is very normal for most work places saying no cell phones or personnel calls on a company phone. People tday think a cell phone is thier right to make calls, it is not.
Where I work if we catch you on a cell phone you are fired on the spot, there will be more and more of this, so get used to it.
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| 1/26/2013 8:08:59 PM |
Profession hinders love |
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jrbogie1949
Ventura, CA
68, joined Mar. 2009
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You're totally entitled to your opinion but I do work with a defense contractor and with everything being slapped with either a clearance or a NDA to be signed, I don't think this is uncalled for.
I don't go around meeting women and telling them that my life is a big secret. It's once in the relationship and unable to take a call because my phone was to be left behind and wasn't allowed inside a building etc... that causes issues.
As far as intimidation is concerned, men are intimidated by women with successful careers or in position of power. I believe in is the other way around as well. I have no great position of power or a "successful"(yet) career, but I have been by friends when women stayed away just because they didn't know what to talk about.
i'm not trying to be a d*ck but you brought this thing about your job hindering your love life and blame travel, secrecy and intimidation. if women feel intimidated by you on a regular basis then it's obvious that you either have a problem picking women who are secure in their own being or your behavior is intimidating. so change your behavior or make better choices.
i can't speak to the 'secrecy' of your job but i adhered to very strick confidentiality agreements for decades and years in the military with a top secret clearance and through all of that i visited fifty two countries on six continents. without even mentioning the secrecy aspects of my life i've got plenty to talk about with a woman and i'm having difficulty understanding your problem. pick a country that she hasn't been to that i have and she'll have to shut me up before i can finnish talking about the people, geography, traditions and customes of the country. i'm no don juan but i do know that if i can't think of anything to talk about me there's always her we can talk about. chicks love to talk about themselves just as we do. we all have frustrations in this love thing but you're blaming the wrong things it seems to me. think about it like this. you think your job is keeping you from finding love. what you do takes you away. it intimidates women. it's secret and you can't talk about it. so do this. the next time you find yourself conversing with a pretty gal..................
FORGET ABOUT YOUR F**KING JOB!!!!!
........if women still don't know what to talk about you have big problems and they're not job related.
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| 2/2/2013 9:01:19 AM |
Profession hinders love |
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deneez
Rochester, MI
58, joined Apr. 2012
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Are there any girls who would like to give their input?
Regardless of type of profession, I tend to think no one wants to come home after a long day and talk 'shop'.
Would I be wrong in suggesting that no one desires to leave their job and then come home to it?
I've had the opportunity to 'date' fellow male co-workers, and passed.
I want to come home, snuggle under a blanket and listen to the sound of silence.
I'm much older than you, but in your case you may feel more comfortable in the company of a lady where the focus of communication is about your personal similarities...not in what you do for a living.
If your job entails you spend alot of time with it, be straight forward from the beginning.
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| 2/3/2013 5:18:33 PM |
Profession hinders love |
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lilod
Aurora, IL
51, joined Aug. 2012
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You're totally entitled to your opinion but I do work with a defense contractor and with everything being slapped with either a clearance or a NDA to be signed, I don't think this is uncalled for.
I don't go around meeting women and telling them that my life is a big secret. It's once in the relationship and unable to take a call because my phone was to be left behind and wasn't allowed inside a building etc... that causes issues.
As far as intimidation is concerned, men are intimidated by women with successful careers or in position of power. I believe in is the other way around as well. I have no great position of power or a "successful"(yet) career, but I have been by friends when women stayed away just because they didn't know what to talk about.
If those sorts of things are causing issues for you, you're dating the wrong kind of woman. Any adult who can't understand that you may not be available by phone while you're at work is...well...not an adult at all, and certainly not someone you'd want to be in a relationship with.
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| 2/3/2013 5:21:41 PM |
Profession hinders love |
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lilod
Aurora, IL
51, joined Aug. 2012
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Regardless of type of profession, I tend to think no one wants to come home after a long day and talk 'shop'.
Would I be wrong in suggesting that no one desires to leave their job and then come home to it?
Yes, you would be very wrong in that. It may be your preference and undoubtedly there are many others who share it, but it's far from universal. There are many people who really enjoy their work and are very immersed in it and want to be able to share it at home. There are people in high-stress professions who find it much easier to relate to someone who understands what their day was like and can process it with them on the toughest days. And, I'm sure there are other scenarios I haven't thought of. Bottom line: any sentence that starts out "no one wants" is probably inaccurate.
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| 2/4/2013 3:48:52 AM |
Profession hinders love |
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megpies
San Antonio, TX
39, joined Jan. 2012
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My only hindrance in relation to my profession is the fact that I work night shift and spend all my days off with my kids. But I've been able to manage with understanding individuals even if we've only dated for a little while. At least I know it's possible. Good luck 
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