| 10/16/2014 12:01:34 AM |
Who stopped loving first? |
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xgod242
Aurora, IL
42, joined Sep. 2013
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For me, it was her.
She stopped caring and completely shut down in the bedroom. It was around the 2-year mark when things cooled down. She just went cold and never wanted to do it any more.
I think it was the fact that she thought we would have had kids by then, and so did I. But for some reason she decided that it would never happen.
It just took her another 12 years to tell me that.
I'm not dense or slow, but dammit, when you commit for life, you can always hope, ya know?
I loved her even though we never did anything other than work opposing shifts and hardly see one another anymore.
Money killed the love.
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| 10/16/2014 3:04:33 AM |
Who stopped loving first? |
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ronleeseberg
Mauston, WI
50, joined Jan. 2012
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Not sure if she ever did to begin with. If you truly loved someone you would never treat anyone like she did me.
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| 10/16/2014 6:54:42 AM |
Who stopped loving first? |
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waki_1
Suwanee, GA
51, joined Sep. 2014
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Well, I guess me...but during our long marriage and raising 2 kids the love changed and after many very personal disagreements, it became real easy to stop lovin each other....we still care for each others welfare, but not in love...
To find love and to keep it exciting and worthy of a lifelong committment requires unprecedented attention and a lot of work...More work than raising your children because that is true unconditional love where a marriage is always with conditions.. 2 conditions, his and hers year in and out..
[Edited 10/16/2014 6:56:49 AM ]
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| 10/16/2014 8:27:51 PM |
Who stopped loving first? |
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purplerider1200
South Bend, IN
61, joined Aug. 2011
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Good question. I committed myself to loving wife for life. Problem was, that my ex wanted to in first date mode constantly. As I found out later, after my divorce, My wife was in love with "being in love". Or, what I call infatuation. She wanted all-consuming activity, all the time. I was supposed to want to drop everything in an instant for her. This included work, any necessary chores. I wasn't to have friends, because they got in the way. Her friends were a different matter, I was supposed think them as being the greatest thing since sliced bread. When she said "I want a divorce", I was hurt at first. After a couple weeks, I felt like my burden was lifted. The longer she was gone and out of contact with me, the better I felt. At one time, I would have accepted her back. Now I don't give a damm where she is.
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| 10/16/2014 8:33:28 PM |
Who stopped loving first? |
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pickygirl72
Pinon Hills, CA
46, joined Sep. 2011
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My husband fell out of love with me first. We were together 20yrs.
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| 10/23/2014 10:46:14 AM |
Who stopped loving first? |
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1975xray
Connersville, IN
41, joined Jul. 2014
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He did...
I can say I was with him way to long. I should of gotten out long ago and not wasted my life with someone who never cared about me.
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| 10/25/2014 11:15:27 AM |
Who stopped loving first? |
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naughtybynatur2
Marrero, LA
46, joined Aug. 2014
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I stop loveing him first but he got hooked on dope n I don't go their
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| 10/30/2014 10:24:36 AM |
Who stopped loving first? |
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starr_so_happy
Perry, IA
33, joined Jun. 2014
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Me
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| 10/31/2014 5:49:02 PM |
Who stopped loving first? |
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latango504
Hattiesburg, MS
31, joined Mar. 2014
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It was the woman that stop loving first and every relationship has been long and I go well beyond in putting everything into it they just crap all over you after they then use you for all you have it's ridiculous
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| 11/5/2014 7:02:07 AM |
Who stopped loving first? |
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galaxys14
Spring, TX
44, joined Sep. 2014
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She did
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| 11/9/2014 12:01:53 AM |
Who stopped loving first? |
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jenny_oo
American Falls, ID
40, joined Jul. 2014
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Me. He was ALWAYS working 
Next time I think I'd like somebody unemployed 
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| 11/9/2014 3:04:33 AM |
Who stopped loving first? |
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dodge_ram_it04
Lewis Center, OH
37, joined Apr. 2014
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She did, and it crushed me
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| 11/9/2014 6:20:05 AM |
Who stopped loving first? |
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mr_bdm
Weirton, WV
51, joined Jul. 2014
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she did,with a 21 yr. old kid she hit her perimenapause stage and turned into a lunatic and blamed me for everything,typical.then moved out .dumped kid ,got dumped by 2 guys from match .com,and married the 3rd one from match.she was 48 he was 21..CAN YOU SAY MIDLIFE CRISIS LMAO.i never believed in it but WHAT THE HELL,if that isnt ,i dont know what is.75% of divorces are initiated by women between 30 and 53....when everybody whigs out...MIDLIFE! i hope nobody ever has to go threw it because WOW does it change peopl.she also was taking advice from the 21 yr, old and a gay man friend of hers.divorce is bad in gods eyes but i wonder what the punishment is for adultry and convincing and corceing divorce.probably smoking a turd in hell.honestly though if any one out there starts to see there spouses man or woman change .get them to a doctor asap.its crushing.she worked out every day and was gorgeous but 21 yr old was nothing to look at but something just took her over and she changed...when they hit ..THE CHANGE OF LIFE ITS HELL!
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| 11/11/2014 7:46:58 PM |
Who stopped loving first? |
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sweetmarrie
Baytown, TX
38, joined Oct. 2014
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I was the one that stopped loving first. I was mrried 13yrs and when i found out about his infidelitys that was it. Didn't want him to even touch me. We stayed together for another yr but didn't sleep in the same rm. I divorced and moved on
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| 11/12/2014 6:25:14 AM |
Who stopped loving first? |
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candmann73
Petersburg, VA
43, joined Apr. 2014
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What does it matter the end result is the same we grow apart the relationship is over it didn't work
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| 11/13/2014 9:07:28 AM |
Who stopped loving first? |
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mr_bdm
Weirton, WV
51, joined Jul. 2014
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she did,with a 21 yr. old kid she hit her perimenapause stage and turned into a lunatic and blamed me for everything,typical.then moved out .dumped kid ,got dumped by 2 guys from match .com,and married the 3rd one from match.she was 48 he was 21..CAN YOU SAY MIDLIFE CRISIS LMAO.i never believed in it but WHAT THE HELL,if that isnt ,i dont know what is.75% of divorces are initiated by women between 40 and 53....when everybody whigs out...MIDLIFE! i hope nobody ever has to go threw it because WOW does it change peopl.she also was taking advice from the 21 yr, old and a gay man friend of hers.divorce is bad in gods eyes but i wonder what the punishment is for adultry and convincing and corceing divorce.probably smoking a turd in hell.honestly though if any one out there starts to see there spouses man or woman change .get them to a doctor asap.its crushing.she worked out every day and was gorgeous but 21 yr old was nothing to look at but something just took her over and she changed...when they hit ..THE CHANGE OF LIFE ITS HELL!
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| 11/13/2014 10:01:51 PM |
Who stopped loving first? |
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purplerider1200
South Bend, IN
61, joined Aug. 2011
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she did,with a 21 yr. old kid she hit her perimenapause stage and turned into a lunatic and blamed me for everything,typical.then moved out .dumped kid ,got dumped by 2 guys from match .com,and married the 3rd one from match.she was 48 he was 21..CAN YOU SAY MIDLIFE CRISIS LMAO.i never believed in it but WHAT THE HELL,if that isnt ,i dont know what is.75% of divorces are initiated by women between 30 and 53....when everybody whigs out...MIDLIFE! i hope nobody ever has to go threw it because WOW does it change peopl.she also was taking advice from the 21 yr, old and a gay man friend of hers.divorce is bad in gods eyes but i wonder what the punishment is for adultry and convincing and corceing divorce.probably smoking a turd in hell.honestly though if any one out there starts to see there spouses man or woman change .get them to a doctor asap.its crushing.she worked out every day and was gorgeous but 21 yr old was nothing to look at but something just took her over and she changed...when they hit ..THE CHANGE OF LIFE ITS HELL!
That's the way mine went. Menopause, and brains dropped out of her ass.
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| 11/16/2014 12:13:52 PM |
Who stopped loving first? |
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mr_bdm
Weirton, WV
51, joined Jul. 2014
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WOW bro ..i wouldnt wish that shit on anyoneand unless you go through it ...people dont believe it.but WOW do they change.
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| 11/16/2014 4:32:44 PM |
Who stopped loving first? |
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mboots31
Albion, NE
35, joined Jun. 2014
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She stopped first. I had the bomb dropped on me on my 30th birthday. She was having an affair with her sister's husband who was my best friend since the 4th grade. Went through marriage counseling didn't help at all she still continued. She wouldn't move out for 9 months couldn't kick her out her name was on the house too and she was in school once she graduated she jetted and took the boys and everything out of the house that she wanted and all the while maintained an affair. Not an easy situation. She was a beautiful woman on the outside and a complete a**hole on the inside. The two of them make her sister's life hell and my life hell. I don't post a picture because she has already irritated me on POF and I deleted that profile. She got what she wanted why the hell does she have to snoop into my life. Besides what the hell does she need to be on a dating site for any way. Some days I just wish I could find a woman that is worse than her just to make her life hell in return then I have to think about myself do I want that for me? I have a long road ahead of me my youngest is 5. Naturally this state is a no fault state and seems to be pro women so I have to pay for a worthless babysister that I can't fire. Oh and women don't want to date guys like me stuck with an a** for an ex that just doesn't make for a FUN relationship. Oh yeah she left me because I just work too much. If you asked me she just didn't like her sister cause that is what she complains about. There's more but my stomach is turning thinking about it.
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| 11/17/2014 12:20:54 AM |
Who stopped loving first? |
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single_mom7308
Central City, NE
29, joined Sep. 2012
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Was never married but i fell outta love first cuz he was controlling me and got to where he was ignoring me on weekends and giving me excuses y he couldnt come me and my daughter and it irked me plus i fell for another man in another state and still speak with him to to this day and take it day by day with him and couldnt be happier with him. Yes he may be in law enforcement but it dnt stop me from wantin to be with him. Im always happy after talkin to him and a smile ear to ear after talkin to him. He makes me feel so special and loved and wanted and my ex bf didnt make me feel that way.    
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| 11/17/2014 3:36:38 AM |
Who stopped loving first? |
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texhappy
Baytown, TX
55, joined Mar. 2012
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I guess I would have to say me. I stopped loving her as soon as she started loving a guy at her job.  
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| 11/17/2014 6:57:29 AM |
Who stopped loving first? |
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xgod242
Aurora, IL
42, joined Sep. 2013
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She stopped first. I had the bomb dropped on me on my 30th birthday. She was having an affair with her sister's husband who was my best friend since the 4th grade. Went through marriage counseling didn't help at all she still continued. She wouldn't move out for 9 months couldn't kick her out her name was on the house too and she was in school once she graduated she jetted and took the boys and everything out of the house that she wanted and all the while maintained an affair. Not an easy situation. She was a beautiful woman on the outside and a complete a**hole on the inside. The two of them make her sister's life hell and my life hell. I don't post a picture because she has already irritated me on POF and I deleted that profile. She got what she wanted why the hell does she have to snoop into my life. Besides what the hell does she need to be on a dating site for any way. Some days I just wish I could find a woman that is worse than her just to make her life hell in return then I have to think about myself do I want that for me? I have a long road ahead of me my youngest is 5. Naturally this state is a no fault state and seems to be pro women so I have to pay for a worthless babysister that I can't fire. Oh and women don't want to date guys like me stuck with an a** for an ex that just doesn't make for a FUN relationship. Oh yeah she left me because I just work too much. If you asked me she just didn't like her sister cause that is what she complains about. There's more but my stomach is turning thinking about it.
Re: her following you on dating sites.
She is probably jealous that you might get what she has: someone who you can confide in, someone you can be with in the way she is with your brother-in-law.
Those of us who still hold a flame for our old loves have a tiny spark of jealousy when we see them with someone else who makes them smile. We grow to accept and move on, but at first there is that spike of adrenaline when you find out the one you left behind is with someone else. She probably feels that way about you - following you on dating websites.
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| 11/18/2014 7:33:17 PM |
Who stopped loving first? |
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mboots31
Albion, NE
35, joined Jun. 2014
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Re: her following you on dating sites.
She is probably jealous that you might get what she has: someone who you can confide in, someone you can be with in the way she is with your brother-in-law.
Those of us who still hold a flame for our old loves have a tiny spark of jealousy when we see them with someone else who makes them smile. We grow to accept and move on, but at first there is that spike of adrenaline when you find out the one you left behind is with someone else. She probably feels that way about you - following you on dating websites.
I honestly don't believe that she has ever had a form of spark. Her following me only is for one purpose to damage me further.
Knowing how she really is there is no question she only has one purpose make sure that I am single permanently so when there is a court battle over the boys that I don't have a significant other for support.
To me that is very important to acquire a mother figure for my boys.
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| 11/28/2014 7:23:50 PM |
Who stopped loving first? |
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ladiebugg55
Redding, CA
61, joined Jun. 2012
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It was mutual..but he came to me 1st to say that he'd always love me, but he wasn't in love with me any longer..I told him I felt the same way..marriage over..
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| 11/28/2014 10:27:55 PM |
Who stopped loving first? |
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bluemoon357
Elizabethtown, KY
53, joined Dec. 2010
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I guess I would say that was me. We argued alot over the stupidest shit and I wasnt happy. She wasnt either. So I filed.
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| 11/29/2014 5:42:00 PM |
Who stopped loving first? |
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lookin4him2012
Boone, NC
49, joined Jan. 2012
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For me, it was her.
She stopped caring and completely shut down in the bedroom. It was around the 2-year mark when things cooled down. She just went cold and never wanted to do it any more.
I think it was the fact that she thought we would have had kids by then, and so did I. But for some reason she decided that it would never happen.
It just took her another 12 years to tell me that.
I'm not dense or slow, but dammit, when you commit for life, you can always hope, ya know?
I loved her even though we never did anything other than work opposing shifts and hardly see one another anymore.
Money killed the love.
My ex-husband told me he never really loved me when we married and he hoped he would learn to over time. He left me after 3 children and our sex was fine all those years and he left anyway for an old girlfriend from high school that found him on facebook. She wanted saved from her marriage and eventually left him. He is alone now and probably regrets ever leaving. I treated him like gold and been treated like sh8t by every guy I've dated since my divorce. Life isn't fair. OH well.
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| 11/29/2014 6:17:22 PM |
Who stopped loving first? |
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hz_april
Happy, TX
50, joined Nov. 2014
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I'm not sure. Maybe me....due to all the years of being treated so crappy.
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| 12/23/2014 2:11:06 AM |
Who stopped loving first? |
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wildfir
Albany, IN
46, joined Sep. 2013
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I did when I found out he had been cheating on me for 2 and half yrs.
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| 12/27/2014 1:19:01 PM |
Who stopped loving first? |
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juicyjaye38
Erie, PA
41, joined Aug. 2013
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My husband fell out of love with me back in 2004... And for eight out of these last ten years I was in denial trying to make it work... And it was clearly shown, nothing was there... Just empty ??
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| 1/17/2015 1:01:34 PM |
Who stopped loving first? |
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newtothegame1
Tillamook, OR
30, joined Dec. 2014
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My wife was the one who stopped loving me first. She got really distint and just acted weird. Next thing I know she's talking to a bunch of other guys and wants a divorce. Haven't even been married for 2 years and bam. I loved her with my heart and soul. I tried my best to save it but it didn't work.
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| 1/19/2015 1:44:20 PM |
Who stopped loving first? |
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oppsiidazi
Orr, MN
47, joined Oct. 2014
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Sadly,
I have to own up to this aspect of my failing marriage. I never did love
my Ex-husband. I got pregnant while dating him and married him in order
to bring our child up in a two parent family. Looking back in hindsight, I
should of divorced him early on and not stay for nearly 20yrs.
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| 1/19/2015 1:56:17 PM |
Who stopped loving first? |
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txcountrymedic
Pleasanton, TX
39, joined Mar. 2014
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I would have to say both. She cheated so i left.
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| 1/19/2015 4:55:31 PM |
Who stopped loving first? |
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areyoumyking
Madison Heights, VA
44, joined Jun. 2014
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He did! I was the rebound for him after his 18 year marriage (she left him for another woman). He and I were best friends that should have stayed as friends. After 4 and a half years of marriage he told me he wanted a divorce. I left and 8 days later he had another woman moved in. 
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| 1/28/2015 7:39:37 AM |
Who stopped loving first? |
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romantikind13
San Antonio, TX
47, joined Dec. 2014
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This is how I see it
Both start loving each other then it ends .
I loved her I tried to change ,prayed ,waited, stayed faithful ,told her she was treating me bad ,and to no avail .
The last thing I said to her
You made me stop loving you it was not friends ,her family , my family or anything else it was you and you alone own this .
Never seen her never want to hope she find what see is looking for in her life .
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| 2/20/2015 4:32:55 AM |
Who stopped loving first? |
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a_new_me_71
Arkadelphia, AR
45, joined Dec. 2014
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I don't think my ex ever really loved me to begin with... I don't think he knows how to love anybody...
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