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| 6/19/2015 5:08:52 PM |
Happy now, guys? |
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machug59
Fairfield, CA
94, joined Dec. 2011
|
It's Good To Be A Man
Your last name stays put.
The garage is all yours.
Wedding plans take care of themselves.
Chocolate is just another snack.
You can be President.
You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park.
Car mechanics tell you the truth.
You don't give a rat's a** if someone notices your new haircut.
The world is your urinal.
Same work... more pay.
Wrinkles add character.
Wedding Dress $5000; Tux rental $100.
People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them.
The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected.
New shoes don't cut, blister or mangle your feet.
Your pals can be trusted never to trap you with: "Notice anything
different?"
Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.
A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.
You can open all your own jars.
You can leave the motel bed unmade.
You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness. If someone
forgets to invite you to something, he can still be your friend.
Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack.
If you are 38 and single, nobody notices.
Everything on your face stays its original colour.
Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.
You don't have to clean your apartment if the maid is coming.
You can drop by to see a friend without having to bring a little gift.
You are not expected to know the names of more than five colours.
You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.
You almost never have strap problems in public.
You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.
The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.
You don't have to shave below your neck.
Your belly usually hides your big fat hips.
One wallet and one pair of shoes, one colour, all seasons.
You can "do" your nails with a pocket-knife.
Meet singles at DateHookup.dating, we're 100% free! Join now!
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| 6/19/2015 5:12:24 PM |
Happy now, guys? |
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bugsy49
Redding, CA
51, joined Mar. 2014
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| 6/19/2015 5:14:02 PM |
Happy now, guys? |
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dasnixter
Jessieville, AR
57, joined Jul. 2010
|
Tom Petty - It's Good To Be King -
www.youtube.com/watch?v=2SF1iLXSQto
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| 6/19/2015 5:21:13 PM |
Happy now, guys? |
|
inni_dreamz
Pasadena, CA
50, joined Nov. 2012
|
~mach 
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| 6/19/2015 5:23:24 PM |
Happy now, guys? |
|
machug59
Fairfield, CA
94, joined Dec. 2011
|
Just some light hearted fun.
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| 6/19/2015 5:23:44 PM |
Happy now, guys? |
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inni_dreamz
Pasadena, CA
50, joined Nov. 2012
|
Oh I love it - we need more of that in here!!!
|
| 6/19/2015 5:24:15 PM |
Happy now, guys? |
|
settee_m
Dallas, TX
62, joined Feb. 2013
|
|
| 6/19/2015 5:25:02 PM |
Happy now, guys? |
|
eyesofmedusa
San Antonio, TX
50, joined Jun. 2012
|
|
| 6/19/2015 5:25:26 PM |
Happy now, guys? |
|
scoobs78
Saint Joseph, MO
37, joined Jun. 2013
|
It's Good To Be A Man
Your last name stays put.
The garage is all yours.
Wedding plans take care of themselves.
Chocolate is just another snack.
You can be President.
You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park.
Car mechanics tell you the truth.
You don't give a rat's a** if someone notices your new haircut.
The world is your urinal.
Same work... more pay.
Wrinkles add character.
Wedding Dress $5000; Tux rental $100.
People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them.
The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected.
New shoes don't cut, blister or mangle your feet.
Your pals can be trusted never to trap you with: "Notice anything
different?"
Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.
A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.
You can open all your own jars.
You can leave the motel bed unmade.
You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness. If someone
forgets to invite you to something, he can still be your friend.
Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack.
If you are 38 and single, nobody notices.
Everything on your face stays its original colour.
Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.
You don't have to clean your apartment if the maid is coming.
You can drop by to see a friend without having to bring a little gift.
You are not expected to know the names of more than five colours.
You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.
You almost never have strap problems in public.
You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.
The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.
You don't have to shave below your neck.
Your belly usually hides your big fat hips.
One wallet and one pair of shoes, one colour, all seasons.
You can "do" your nails with a pocket-knife.
u left out he can get up and make his own sammich and do his own laundry and pick up after himself!
|
| 6/19/2015 5:26:49 PM |
Happy now, guys? |
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archer513
Cincinnati, OH
40, joined Dec. 2014
|
Go the Chaz Bono route 
You can be black now too if yA want
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| 6/19/2015 5:29:20 PM |
Happy now, guys? |
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machug59
Fairfield, CA
94, joined Dec. 2011
|
Now, how did that list forget this gem...?
You don't worry about the eyebrow hairs that grow 5 inches long.
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| 6/19/2015 5:29:54 PM |
Happy now, guys? |
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cajunmister
Kinder, LA
64, joined May. 2007
|
Yall just jelly
[Edited 6/19/2015 5:31:14 PM ]
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| 6/19/2015 5:31:19 PM |
Happy now, guys? |
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inni_dreamz
Pasadena, CA
50, joined Nov. 2012
|
It's Good To Be A Man....
The world is your urinal.
and you can spell your name in the snow! water a tree! pee standing UP!
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| 6/19/2015 5:31:47 PM |
Happy now, guys? |
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machug59
Fairfield, CA
94, joined Dec. 2011
|
@cajun
You have no idea how hard it is to keep all of the hundreds of color shade names straight.
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| 6/19/2015 5:34:26 PM |
Happy now, guys? |
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archer513
Cincinnati, OH
40, joined Dec. 2014
|
It's good to be king 
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| 6/19/2015 5:35:11 PM |
Happy now, guys? |
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scoobs78
Saint Joseph, MO
37, joined Jun. 2013
|
and ur allowed to target, harass and stalk anyone u like! and there's no statutory rape laws to prohibit 40 and up yr old men from persuing and having sex with a 14 yr old child!
[Edited 6/19/2015 5:36:22 PM ]
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| 6/19/2015 5:36:19 PM |
Happy now, guys? |
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dasnixter
Jessieville, AR
57, joined Jul. 2010
|
You don't worry about the eyebrow hairs that grow 5 inches long.
Una Brau
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| 6/19/2015 5:37:34 PM |
Happy now, guys? |
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im2thexy
Belleville, ON
47, joined Dec. 2014
online now!
|
They should be happy with that list...but nooooooo some of them still complain...
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| 6/19/2015 5:37:38 PM |
Happy now, guys? |
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machug59
Fairfield, CA
94, joined Dec. 2011
|
@scoobs
I am trying to keep this thread light hearted.
I am asking nicely for people not to bring in the crap and try to get it going in here.
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| 6/19/2015 5:37:59 PM |
Happy now, guys? |
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cajunmister
Kinder, LA
64, joined May. 2007
|
@cajun
You have no idea how hard it is to keep all of the hundreds of color shade names straight.
You mean there are other colors than black an brown?
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| 6/19/2015 5:40:06 PM |
Happy now, guys? |
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rocky_dennis
Bethany Beach, DE
35, joined Nov. 2013
|
The dryer is my favorite appliance in the house. Dry means clean or wrinkle free!
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| 6/19/2015 5:43:22 PM |
Happy now, guys? |
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inni_dreamz
Pasadena, CA
50, joined Nov. 2012
|
I'm happy to be a woman, and I'm not going to flip but...
I do think it would be great to be a man! I wish I could do it for a week or so - just to see what it feels like!
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| 6/19/2015 5:45:59 PM |
Happy now, guys? |
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1adorable
Berkeley, CA
53, joined Oct. 2014
|
Nay.. I'll stay a woman.. We live longer!
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| 6/19/2015 5:48:21 PM |
Happy now, guys? |
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sir_hugo_drax
Big Timber, MT
24, joined Apr. 2014
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The dryer is my favorite appliance in the house. Dry means clean or wrinkle free!
Yep...
Just toss in a scented fabric softener sheet and VOILA...clean clothes...
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| 6/19/2015 5:53:20 PM |
Happy now, guys? |
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machug59
Fairfield, CA
94, joined Dec. 2011
|
You mean there are other colors than black an brown?
Black
Kitty Cat Black, Leather Jacket, Licorice, Black Hole, Muscle Shell Black (Black), New Sneakers, Starry Night, Storm Cloud Black, Cosmic Black, Shades of Black, Midnight, ebony, jet, lava, Charcoal...
Brown
Bunny Brown, Chocolate, Mouse Brown, Asteroid Brown, Ocean Floor (Brown), Pet Shop, Whoo Brown, Woodstock Mud, Chock-A-Lot Shake, Portobello, Mississippi Mud Pie, Brown Sugar, Mother Earth Brown, Sweet Brown, tan, taupe...
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| 6/19/2015 5:54:05 PM |
Happy now, guys? |
|
bluecougareyes
Chelan, WA
71, joined Nov. 2008
online now!
|
The world is your urinal.
My lawn stay ever GREEN, because I pee on it daily !...
|
| 6/19/2015 5:54:33 PM |
Happy now, guys? |
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inni_dreamz
Pasadena, CA
50, joined Nov. 2012
|
Very good, mach!
When I go to get my hair done, I tell her, I want vanilla high lights and milk chocolate low lights
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| 6/19/2015 5:55:41 PM |
Happy now, guys? |
|
inni_dreamz
Pasadena, CA
50, joined Nov. 2012
|
Yep...
Just toss in a scented fabric softener sheet and VOILA...clean clothes...
 
I DO use the dryer as an iron, but never as a washing machine!!! 
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| 6/19/2015 5:59:45 PM |
Happy now, guys? |
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machug59
Fairfield, CA
94, joined Dec. 2011
|
Then there is this...
You can rationalize any behavior with the handy phrase "F*#k it!"
If you retain water, it's in a canteen.
You can eat a banana in a hardware store.
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| 6/19/2015 5:59:52 PM |
Happy now, guys? |
|
sir_hugo_drax
Big Timber, MT
24, joined Apr. 2014
|
Black
Kitty Cat Black, Leather Jacket, Licorice, Black Hole, Muscle Shell Black (Black), New Sneakers, Starry Night, Storm Cloud Black, Cosmic Black, Shades of Black, Midnight, ebony, jet, lava, Charcoal
You forgot Rachel Dolezal black...
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| 6/19/2015 6:01:37 PM |
Happy now, guys? |
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machug59
Fairfield, CA
94, joined Dec. 2011
|
baaaaaad, hugo...
oh my...
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| 6/19/2015 6:04:04 PM |
Happy now, guys? |
|
cajunmister
Kinder, LA
64, joined May. 2007
|
Black
Kitty Cat Black, Leather Jacket, Licorice, Black Hole, Muscle Shell Black (Black), New Sneakers, Starry Night, Storm Cloud Black, Cosmic Black, Shades of Black, Midnight, ebony, jet, lava, Charcoal...
Brown
Bunny Brown, Chocolate, Mouse Brown, Asteroid Brown, Ocean Floor (Brown), Pet Shop, Whoo Brown, Woodstock Mud, Chock-A-Lot Shake, Portobello, Mississippi Mud Pie, Brown Sugar, Mother Earth Brown, Sweet Brown, tan, taupe...
Have headache now
|
| 6/19/2015 6:06:21 PM |
Happy now, guys? |
|
machug59
Fairfield, CA
94, joined Dec. 2011
|
@cajun
Awwwwwwww, come have a drink and I can impress you with the shades of blue.
At least a 2 drink minimum for that...lmao.
|
| 6/19/2015 6:06:31 PM |
Happy now, guys? |
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rocky_dennis
Bethany Beach, DE
35, joined Nov. 2013
|
Then there is this...
You can rationalize any behavior with the handy phrase "F*#k it!"
If you retain water, it's in a canteen.
You can eat a banana in a hardware store.
Work smarter and not harder. There's only so many hours in the day, to do things you want to do. An hour here, a few minutes there equals f**k it.
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| 6/19/2015 6:16:56 PM |
Happy now, guys? |
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1adorable
Berkeley, CA
53, joined Oct. 2014
|
Duct Tape and WD40.. And were all happy!
|
| 6/19/2015 6:20:53 PM |
Happy now, guys? |
|
cajunmister
Kinder, LA
64, joined May. 2007
|
@cajun
Awwwwwwww, come have a drink and I can impress you with the shades of blue.
At least a 2 drink minimum for that...lmao.
Thinkin but becoming a teatotaler
|
| 6/19/2015 6:22:06 PM |
Happy now, guys? |
|
kartusch
Logan, UT
40, joined May. 2014
|
Hugs
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| 6/19/2015 6:22:37 PM |
Happy now, guys? |
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machug59
Fairfield, CA
94, joined Dec. 2011
|
@ cajun
chicken...
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| 6/19/2015 6:23:01 PM |
Happy now, guys? |
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scoobs78
Saint Joseph, MO
37, joined Jun. 2013
|
Duct Tape and WD40.. And were all happy!
rusty parts
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| 6/19/2015 6:35:07 PM |
Happy now, guys? |
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beverduster
La Feria, TX
50, joined Apr. 2008
|
where is my sammich & beer?
|
| 6/19/2015 6:37:21 PM |
Happy now, guys? |
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beverduster
La Feria, TX
50, joined Apr. 2008
|
Duct Tape and WD40.. And were all happy!
|
| 6/19/2015 6:38:34 PM |
Happy now, guys? |
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craftybtch
Iron Mountain, MI
96, joined Feb. 2015
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cute Mach
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| 6/19/2015 6:39:07 PM |
Happy now, guys? |
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machug59
Fairfield, CA
94, joined Dec. 2011
|
So, that's why...
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| 6/19/2015 6:39:12 PM |
Happy now, guys? |
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craftybtch
Iron Mountain, MI
96, joined Feb. 2015
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Hugs
Where you been
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| 6/19/2015 6:39:58 PM |
Happy now, guys? |
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kartusch
Logan, UT
40, joined May. 2014
|
Oh that is just funny WD 40 is that an old label?
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| 6/19/2015 6:43:21 PM |
Happy now, guys? |
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beverduster
La Feria, TX
50, joined Apr. 2008
|
pretty close, im a beliver in it
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| 6/19/2015 6:43:57 PM |
Happy now, guys? |
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metu
Auburndale, FL
53, joined Apr. 2007
|
You mean there are other colors than black an brown?
Erm...there's also RED!
Fun thread, Mach...
Disclaimer: I didn't read the whole thread...but I enjoy fooking with Tony...
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| 6/19/2015 6:51:59 PM |
Happy now, guys? |
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machug59
Fairfield, CA
94, joined Dec. 2011
|
metu
ya know he loves it!!!
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| 6/19/2015 6:56:29 PM |
Happy now, guys? |
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scoobs78
Saint Joseph, MO
37, joined Jun. 2013
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green, blue n yellow are good colors
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| 6/19/2015 7:03:10 PM |
Happy now, guys? |
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machug59
Fairfield, CA
94, joined Dec. 2011
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Women like duct tape too, very useful.
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| 6/19/2015 7:04:11 PM |
Happy now, guys? |
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scoobs78
Saint Joseph, MO
37, joined Jun. 2013
|
men like it just as women do!
[Edited 6/19/2015 7:04:55 PM ]
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| 6/19/2015 7:04:35 PM |
Happy now, guys? |
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bugsy49
Redding, CA
51, joined Mar. 2014
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you know mach it works both ways.
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| 6/19/2015 7:05:31 PM |
Happy now, guys? |
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scoobs78
Saint Joseph, MO
37, joined Jun. 2013
|
duct tape and a straight jacket
[Edited 6/19/2015 7:05:56 PM ]
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| 6/19/2015 7:07:44 PM |
Happy now, guys? |
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machug59
Fairfield, CA
94, joined Dec. 2011
|
you know mach it works both ways.
pfffffftttt...
If you can catch me!
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| 6/19/2015 7:09:05 PM |
Happy now, guys? |
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grneyesrme
Sacramento, CA
47, joined Aug. 2013
|
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| 6/19/2015 7:16:02 PM |
Happy now, guys? |
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pdforone
Litchfield, OH
63, joined Jul. 2010
|
 So that apple cost you too Eve? Quit your whining!
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| 6/19/2015 7:17:17 PM |
Happy now, guys? |
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machug59
Fairfield, CA
94, joined Dec. 2011
|
@ pd
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| 6/19/2015 7:21:05 PM |
Happy now, guys? |
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bugsy49
Redding, CA
51, joined Mar. 2014
|
mach....pfffffftttt...
If you can catch me!
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| 6/19/2015 7:58:45 PM |
Happy now, guys? |
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machug59
Fairfield, CA
94, joined Dec. 2011
|
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| 6/19/2015 8:10:46 PM |
Happy now, guys? |
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jetzazzy
Milwaukee, WI
47, joined Aug. 2014
|
Wow.
What do I have to complain about?
And we get to pick too!
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