| 4/3/2016 9:23:50 AM |
How screwed are you? |
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playingindirt
Eugene, OR
60, joined Mar. 2014
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I've got a laptop left of me. I don't think you can kill zombies with a laptop.
Meet singles at DateHookup.dating, we're 100% free! Join now!
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| 4/3/2016 9:24:53 AM |
How screwed are you? |
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creepinggeisha
Beverly Hills, CA
42, joined Oct. 2015
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I got a carpet cleaner. Lol
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| 4/3/2016 9:25:56 AM |
How screwed are you? |
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jer3552
Vale, OR
61, joined Oct. 2013
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i got my trusty sawed off shotgun here and women are always kicking in my door to have their way with me 
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| 4/3/2016 9:26:37 AM |
How screwed are you? |
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ohdannyboy59
Arlington, TX
56, joined Sep. 2012
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I'd be out of coffee.
Plenty screwed.
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| 4/3/2016 9:27:04 AM |
How screwed are you? |
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walt_hallow
Lexington, KY
62, joined Nov. 2014
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| 4/3/2016 9:27:55 AM |
How screwed are you? |
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idliketotalk
Punxsutawney, PA
53, joined Oct. 2013
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a house plant, there is a game called Plants and Zombies I've heard of.
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| 4/3/2016 9:30:09 AM |
How screwed are you? |
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jer3552
Vale, OR
61, joined Oct. 2013
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playing would offer him a toke
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| 4/3/2016 9:30:17 AM |
How screwed are you? |
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candy0426
Newtown, PA
48, joined Aug. 2014
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I have a Bic Pen.
He's screwed!
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| 4/3/2016 9:31:47 AM |
How screwed are you? |
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playingindirt
Eugene, OR
60, joined Mar. 2014
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playing would offer him a toke
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| 4/3/2016 9:33:19 AM |
How screwed are you? |
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gothygoogoo
Red Bluff, CA
59, joined Feb. 2015
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i am sitting here with a co2bb pistol in the small of my back right now!
i use it to chase the little bastard neighborhood dogs out of here! little corksoakers go right through the fence!
i would use the bb pistol to shoot at the eyes of the zombies while i walked 2 feet and grabbed both of my loaded 22 rifles - each with a 10 shot banana clip on them...
if i had a couple of seconds more
i would grab the machette and meat cleaver that are sitting in my greenhouse just a few feet away from me...
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| 4/3/2016 9:50:48 AM |
How screwed are you? |
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thebigugly0
Kent, OH
45, joined Sep. 2012
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Depends on how far left I am allowed.
To my immediate left, a CD rack. No good.
Two feet beyond that is to portable heaters, good but not great.
Just inside the bedroom is my Mossberg 12 gauge and my Taurus .44. That'll work.
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| 4/3/2016 9:54:22 AM |
How screwed are you? |
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fairymaiden
Bristol, CT
49, joined Mar. 2014
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I have a treadmill to my left which I am trying to force myself on to. I suppose if I could pick this thing up and smash him with it he'd be the one that was screwed.
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| 4/3/2016 9:55:48 AM |
How screwed are you? |
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damnsnhere
Trussville, AL
45, joined Feb. 2016
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couple pistols in the drawer to my left.. he's toast.
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| 4/3/2016 10:00:27 AM |
How screwed are you? |
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condor_0000
Tampa, FL
58, joined Feb. 2013
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The zombie dude is toast. I've got my trusty Star Wars The Force Awakens Kylo Ren Deluxe Electronic Lightsaber sitting right here and ready for action.
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| 4/3/2016 10:02:29 AM |
How screwed are you? |
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kinderbtch
Knoxville, TN
53, joined Feb. 2015
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I'm not wasting my booze and cocaine..
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| 4/3/2016 10:05:23 AM |
How screwed are you? |
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movez2themusic
FukunoFukuno
Japan
49, joined Feb. 2016
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He's a gonner - Buck knife (gotta sharpen it, thanks for the reminder)in top drawer and heavy steel lamp on top .. Knock it off its a** and grab the buck.
Damn mess  Good thing I did not clean the carpets yet
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| 4/3/2016 10:07:11 AM |
How screwed are you? |
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easttowest72
Bremen, GA
44, joined Sep. 2014
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I have a 38 pistol but it's on my right. What can I say I'm right handed. Or I'll splash him with my hot coffee.
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| 4/3/2016 10:08:07 AM |
How screwed are you? |
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creepinggeisha
Beverly Hills, CA
42, joined Oct. 2015
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My dog is to my left.
Not sure if that would be a weapon or a snack.
Lol
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| 4/3/2016 10:09:55 AM |
How screwed are you? |
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lurky_lurker
Norcross, GA
40, joined Feb. 2016
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Bacon on the left side of my plate
Toast on the right side of my plate
Eggs in the middle
Plastic spork in my hand
Yep, I'm "toast"
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| 4/3/2016 10:14:03 AM |
How screwed are you? |
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gothygoogoo
Red Bluff, CA
59, joined Feb. 2015
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where's butter boy
when a woman needs him!!!
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| 4/3/2016 10:15:17 AM |
How screwed are you? |
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kinderbtch
Knoxville, TN
53, joined Feb. 2015
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That f**ker has to get past my pig first...
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| 4/3/2016 10:16:49 AM |
How screwed are you? |
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fairymaiden
Bristol, CT
49, joined Mar. 2014
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Do you really have a pig? Like a little pot bellied pig or a full grown one?
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| 4/3/2016 10:18:48 AM |
How screwed are you? |
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kinderbtch
Knoxville, TN
53, joined Feb. 2015
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She's about 10 years old now, and only cute to me..
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| 4/3/2016 10:19:21 AM |
How screwed are you? |
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jakebearr
Simi Valley, CA
52, joined Sep. 2013
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I got a carpet cleaner. Lol
Rug doctor steam and mad ...
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| 4/3/2016 10:20:50 AM |
How screwed are you? |
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imn0tphoto
Minneapolis, MN
26, joined Mar. 2013
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I'm very large Hoard of weapons
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| 4/3/2016 10:22:15 AM |
How screwed are you? |
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movez2themusic
FukunoFukuno
Japan
49, joined Feb. 2016
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Rug doctor steam and mad ...
Tell that creep to come clean my carpets then ... She has me blocked ...
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| 4/3/2016 11:24:49 AM |
How screwed are you? |
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sinceresammy
Dayton, OH
61, joined Mar. 2014
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The OP should invite him in. He's the best she'll ever do!
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| 4/3/2016 11:29:21 AM |
How screwed are you? |
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dances_in_woods
Henderson, TX
49, joined Mar. 2011
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I've got a machete standing against left side of desk, so I think I've got a fighting chance...
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| 4/3/2016 11:30:27 AM |
How screwed are you? |
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imn0tphoto
Minneapolis, MN
26, joined Mar. 2013
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I believe that
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| 4/3/2016 11:32:35 AM |
How screwed are you? |
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mary__me
Lake City, AR
53, joined Mar. 2014
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My purse.
Oh wait. My taser is in there. Imma be OK.
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| 4/3/2016 11:36:37 AM |
How screwed are you? |
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kinderbtch
Knoxville, TN
53, joined Feb. 2015
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I've got a machete standing against left side of desk, so I think I've got a fighting chance...
Bishes got blades.. How do they expect to ever get raped??
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| 4/3/2016 11:39:08 AM |
How screwed are you? |
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hippo65
Albuquerque, NM
50, joined Apr. 2013
online now!
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I am screwed..
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| 4/3/2016 11:40:51 AM |
How screwed are you? |
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sarahgoldsmith
Norfolk, VA
45, joined Jan. 2014
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Zombies don't exist. But if it's just another bad human being, a burglar, I would defend myself.
Zombie = a decayed human being that can't run. They can't even walk fast because they are all decayed. Their bodies are a bunch of dust & decaying flesh held together by whatever. And humans are suppose to be afraid of them. But they can't move that fast. They are dragging their feet to get everywhere. They move very very slowly.
I will capture one of the zombie. Tie them up & study them to see what make them weak & what kill them. Then feed a whole bunch of zombies the chemical that will kill them.
Vampires do not exist. The people who created the vampire story don't know about blood diseases or aids. Aids didn't exist back then in the year 1800 in Hungary. The vampire story was originally from Hungary. Try sucking the blood of a person with blood disease or with aids. You will end up dying. You won't live forever.
Being white you have a lot going against you. White people are not as attractive as other minority groups. White people have no lips, no ass, & they aged a lot faster than other ethnic groups. You are screwed if you are white anyway since white people are born with a physical defect: no lips & no ass. They are born with a genetic defect too. They aged very very quickly.
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| 4/3/2016 11:41:53 AM |
How screwed are you? |
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flyfish77
Conyers, GA
50, joined Jul. 2014
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p*ssy a** zombie shit,i hate it,there dead allready,there allways makin scary movies around old town conyers,they all are p*ssy stuff an not worth it,why do zombies wear helmets..there dead allready.
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| 4/3/2016 11:43:01 AM |
How screwed are you? |
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enigmaathand
Leavittsburg, OH
35, joined Mar. 2013
|
To my left is a set of 3' steel bolt cutters. I can improvise that to being a melee weapon.
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| 4/3/2016 11:43:59 AM |
How screwed are you? |
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creepinggeisha
Beverly Hills, CA
42, joined Oct. 2015
|
Sometimes ya just wanna..
Ya know?
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| 4/3/2016 11:55:31 AM |
How screwed are you? |
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kinderbtch
Knoxville, TN
53, joined Feb. 2015
|
Zombies don't exist. But if it's just another bad human being, a burglar, I would defend myself.
Zombie = a decayed human being that can't run. They can't even walk fast because they are all decayed. Their bodies are a bunch of dust & decaying flesh held together by whatever. And humans are suppose to be afraid of them. But they can't move that fast. They are dragging their feet to get everywhere. They move very very slowly.
I will capture one of the zombie. Tie them up & study them to see what make them weak & what kill them. Then feed a whole bunch of zombies the chemical that will kill them.
Vampires do not exist. The people who created the vampire story don't know about blood diseases or aids. Aids didn't exist back then in the year 1800 in Hungary. The vampire story was originally from Hungary. Try sucking the blood of a person with blood disease or with aids. You will end up dying. You won't live forever.
Being white you have a lot going against you. White people are not as attractive as other minority groups. White people have no lips, no ass, & they aged a lot faster than other ethnic groups. You are screwed if you are white anyway since white people are born with a physical defect: no lips & no ass. They are born with a genetic defect too. They aged very very quickly.
Were you born a f**kin idiot, or did it grow on you over a period of time??
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| 4/3/2016 11:57:19 AM |
How screwed are you? |
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bandit__geezer
FujianFujian
China
57, joined Oct. 2015
|
I'll be okay. 
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| 4/3/2016 11:57:45 AM |
How screwed are you? |
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imn0tphoto
Minneapolis, MN
26, joined Mar. 2013
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I'm pretty sure the zombies are real
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| 4/3/2016 11:58:48 AM |
How screwed are you? |
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gothygoogoo
Red Bluff, CA
59, joined Feb. 2015
|
there's
a
couple
living on the next street over from me...
i think...
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| 4/3/2016 11:59:32 AM |
How screwed are you? |
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hippo65
Albuquerque, NM
50, joined Apr. 2013
online now!
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Isn't it ironic how I am watching
Resident Evil right now?
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| 4/3/2016 12:00:11 PM |
How screwed are you? |
|
movez2themusic
FukunoFukuno
Japan
49, joined Feb. 2016
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Were you born a f**kin idiot, or did it grow on you over a period of time??
I have that one blocked .. her drivel makes me angry
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| 4/3/2016 12:02:13 PM |
How screwed are you? |
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kinderbtch
Knoxville, TN
53, joined Feb. 2015
|
there's
a
couple
living on the next street over from me...
i think...
That's probably where Sarahgoldsmith lives..
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| 4/3/2016 12:03:28 PM |
How screwed are you? |
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iam_resurrected
Reno, NV
45, joined Jul. 2014
|
Were you born a f**kin idiot, or did it grow on you over a period of time??
I don't believe in the being born that way so that b*tch willingly became who she is 
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| 4/3/2016 12:03:45 PM |
How screwed are you? |
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imn0tphoto
Minneapolis, MN
26, joined Mar. 2013
|
You guys are morons zombies are not alive
they don't live anywhere
That's why they call them Walking Dead
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| 4/3/2016 12:05:06 PM |
How screwed are you? |
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kinderbtch
Knoxville, TN
53, joined Feb. 2015
|
I have that one blocked .. her drivel makes me angry
She sounds like f**kin Bumble Bee gone wild..
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| 4/3/2016 12:15:54 PM |
How screwed are you? |
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hippo65
Albuquerque, NM
50, joined Apr. 2013
online now!
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You guys are morons zombies are not alive
they don't live anywhere
That's why they call them Walking Dead
How do they walk if they are not alive?
How do they grab you?
See you? Hear you? Bite you?
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| 4/3/2016 12:17:06 PM |
How screwed are you? |
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imn0tphoto
Minneapolis, MN
26, joined Mar. 2013
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I'm not a scientist
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| 4/3/2016 12:20:11 PM |
How screwed are you? |
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TheSpazRaz
New York, NY
37, joined Dec. 2015
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The zombie dude is toast. I've got my trusty Star Wars The Force Awakens Kylo Ren Deluxe Electronic Lightsaber sitting right here and ready for action.
This is something Heather would definitely add to her utensil collection.
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| 4/3/2016 12:21:11 PM |
How screwed are you? |
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mustangwriter
Boerne, TX
55, joined Nov. 2009
|
My immediate left?
My Royal Daulton Merlin mug.
It is full of pens and pencils tho.
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| 4/3/2016 12:23:03 PM |
How screwed are you? |
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kinderbtch
Knoxville, TN
53, joined Feb. 2015
|
I'm not a scientist
We gathered that...
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| 4/3/2016 12:24:51 PM |
How screwed are you? |
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iam_resurrected
Reno, NV
45, joined Jul. 2014
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picture of my parents in a frame that would be a good Frisbee if needed to be
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| 4/3/2016 12:27:31 PM |
How screwed are you? |
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sarahgoldsmith
Norfolk, VA
45, joined Jan. 2014
|
For those of you that believe zombies do exist, I have some fairy dust for you. Sprinkle some fairy dust on that zombie & turn him into a beautiful flower. For the lonely ladies, turn that zombie into a good looking, sexy, hot, handsome young man, so you can have some hot sex with him. LOL
Since we are talking about make believe, right? So let's sprinkle some fairy dust on those zombies & turn them into hot looking, handsome young men, so the lonely ladies can have sex with them. Hahaha!
So all the lonely ladies will stop coming to DH forums, & spend their free time having some hot sex with a handsome young man. LOL
Fairy dust = is magical dust from the Disney fairy movies. You can sprinkle the dust & wish for anything you want & your wish will come true.
[Edited 4/3/2016 12:28:44 PM ]
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| 4/3/2016 12:28:38 PM |
How screwed are you? |
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creepinggeisha
Beverly Hills, CA
42, joined Oct. 2015
|
Well if you exist the belief in zombies can't be that far fetched.
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| 4/3/2016 12:29:32 PM |
How screwed are you? |
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kinderbtch
Knoxville, TN
53, joined Feb. 2015
|
I think Scoobs ODed on fairy dust..
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| 4/3/2016 12:32:46 PM |
How screwed are you? |
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pdforone
Litchfield, OH
64, joined Jul. 2010
|
My attack dog is on the couch to my left, that dude wouldn't make it up the drive without me getting a warning! But then he might want to play with the guest!
He is not a hound, but likes female visitors best!
I have two quad canes within arms reach to my left! I can to octodad on him?
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| 4/3/2016 12:37:53 PM |
How screwed are you? |
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enigmaathand
Leavittsburg, OH
35, joined Mar. 2013
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@ KB: he OD on Twinkies and King Dongs.
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| 4/3/2016 1:38:26 PM |
How screwed are you? |
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celyn67
San Antonio, TX
49, joined Jan. 2016
|
My purse is to the left of me, so I'd be really screwed.
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| 4/3/2016 1:40:30 PM |
How screwed are you? |
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movez2themusic
FukunoFukuno
Japan
49, joined Feb. 2016
|
I'm jumping off the balcony and my old BF PB (my boston terrier) better not wiggle on the way down
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| 4/3/2016 1:42:29 PM |
How screwed are you? |
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enigmaathand
Leavittsburg, OH
35, joined Mar. 2013
|
Just so we are aware, I will throw some of you into the horde, to save my cat from being a snack.
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