| 9/12/2008 7:40:36 AM |
The relationship with your EX |
|
arkansasnman
Fayetteville, AR
age: 45 online now!
|
I often hear of couples breaking up and maintaining a relationship with their EX....the dreaded, "Let's stay friends" type of thing.
Is this a good idea?
A) If the feelings aren't completely gone (and they rarely are in a split), doesn't that leave an opening for a reconciliation later?.....if people want that, then don't break up to begin with.....it just makes it harder to move on and have healthy relationships with other people.
B) New love interests aren't stupid. An EX hanging around is cause for concern....see (a) above.
|
| 9/12/2008 7:42:00 AM |
The relationship with your EX |
|
evileddy
Ottawa, ON
age: 35 online now!
|
Unless you have kids.. there's no reason to stay friends with an ex.
|
| 9/12/2008 7:47:05 AM |
The relationship with your EX |
|
arkansasnman
Fayetteville, AR
age: 45 online now!
|
I don't disagree, but many people would consider that immature.....ie...."Two adults should be able to be friends without romantic feelings interferring."
|
| 9/12/2008 7:53:39 AM |
The relationship with your EX |
|
misstrucker1622
Fairmount City, PA
age: 41
|
not everyone can be grown up enough to just be friends. I wish my ex was grown up enough to leave me alone.
|
| 9/12/2008 7:54:23 AM |
The relationship with your EX |
|
evileddy
Ottawa, ON
age: 35 online now!
|
I don't disagree, but many people would consider that immature.....ie...."Two adults should be able to be friends without romantic feelings interferring."
Once you've had sex that goes out the window.
There will always be that connection that new loves will see and cause problems for the weak willed.
And how many times have you heard of people dumping their current to go back with an ex?
No thanks.
|
| 9/12/2008 8:33:58 AM |
The relationship with your EX |
|
night_stalker
Fort Myers, FL
age: 28
|
All my ex's are buried in shallow unmarked graves.
|
| 9/12/2008 8:48:32 AM |
The relationship with your EX |
|
lilmissala
Hartselle, AL
age: 51
|
I am friends with my kids dad. We have been divorced since 84. There was never any chance of reconcilation once the final break was made. Other boyfriends and husband are just x's wouldn't even consider friendship with them however am very close friends with an x mother-in-law and his sisters. Its understood we don't discuss him.
|
| 9/12/2008 9:24:24 AM |
The relationship with your EX |
|
72karmannghia
Lake Worth, FL
age: 44
|
At first it sounded like a good idea, Now 6 months after the divorce Its a pain in the arse.
She thinks I'm still her handyman,shrink, mechanic .... etc.
I have to nip this in the butt.
|
| 9/12/2008 9:27:51 AM |
The relationship with your EX |
|
forgetful1
Old Bridge, NJ
age: 41
|
I only have contact which is limited to maybe once every few months if that with one of my ex boyfriends, I dont strike up conversation or like my ex husband. I have a very good relationship with his sister and her husband and it was made clear after my divorce was final that we can talk about anything in life but i dont want to talk about my ex husband. I woulnt consider being friends with an ex though, after all they are ex's for some reason or another, why be reminded of it.
|
| 9/12/2008 10:46:48 AM |
The relationship with your EX |
|
missmmeoftheday
Brooklyn, NY
age: 42
|
My exhusband's father recently passed away. I attended the services, mainly for my kids, out of respect for my father in law, but also out of respect for my ex.
I was hesitant to do anything for fear that I would be intruding, but I kept a low profile, said hello to the family and friends I knew, etc... and after all was said and done I knew that for me, and for my ex and my kids, it was right for me to have been there for the time that I was. My ex leaned on me for emotional support that I was able to give him; he and I were married for 15 years, and that doesn't just go away, no matter where you're at. And the fact that neither one of us is remarried or recommitted, it probably was easier to be able to be supportive.
That aside, my ex and I try our best to be good parents to our kids, and it's a lot easier to be a good parent when you aren't having to try so hard to be good at being married.
In the beginning, when we first split, I did call on him for things that I shouldn't have- help with something in the house, etc- and he called me on it and I stopped.
|
| 9/12/2008 10:46:56 AM |
The relationship with your EX |
|
arkansasnman
Fayetteville, AR
age: 45 online now!
|
Yeah, I have been suckered into the EX stay friends thing.....it was short-lived and painful.
|
| 9/12/2008 10:55:53 AM |
The relationship with your EX |
|
forgetful1
Old Bridge, NJ
age: 41
|
In my case, when the ex came back it was with a motive of they want sex. How do you give just sex to the ex, in my opinion if the ex wanted to be an ex in the first place, why make the other person feel demoted to all they are good for is sex. Go figuire that one out. I had an ex one time come to me and tell me you were always a good lay, but nothing else, obviously. Nice thing to know. lol
|
| 9/12/2008 11:03:05 AM |
The relationship with your EX |
|
evileddy
Ottawa, ON
age: 35 online now!
|
Remember that on the one night when you are horny as hell.
|
| 9/12/2008 11:05:24 AM |
The relationship with your EX |
|
arkansasnman
Fayetteville, AR
age: 45 online now!
|
In my case, when the ex came back it was with a motive of they want sex. How do you give just sex to the ex, in my opinion if the ex wanted to be an ex in the first place, why make the other person feel demoted to all they are good for is sex. Go figuire that one out. I had an ex one time come to me and tell me you were always a good lay, but nothing else, obviously. Nice thing to know. lol
Many people have difficulty separating sex and feelings of attachment. With an EX it's orders of magnitude more difficult.
|
| 9/12/2008 11:08:43 AM |
The relationship with your EX |
|
forgetful1
Old Bridge, NJ
age: 41
|
Thats the funny thing, he has a girlfriend, he dumped me for her. lol i think they live together too. why come running to me if you got someone at home. i find it kind of odd myself.
|