| 9/15/2008 7:20:56 PM |
When the EX starts being nice, is it a set up? |
|
awakeing
Walled Lake, MI
age: 36
|
Ok I'm feeling like a long tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs!
In the last 2 1/2 weeks the EX has done more for the kids than he EVER has.
He's NEVER done the school shopping thing, this year he actually shelled out
$500 of his own in addition to the $1,000 I spent on back to school stuff.
My daughter has wanted a new bed for the last 7 months, last week he goes out and
just gets her one! 
Today I find myself in a jam because I can't be at 2 places at once. Need to get the boys off the bus and be at a meeting with the cheer-leading coach at the same time. He offers
to get the boys. When I return he's already helped them get their homework finished!
He's never helped with homework that was always my job. He didn't yell at any of us like he usually does. Oh on top of that, he made my last car payment today and took his name off of it. I didn't ask him to do that at all.
Wednesday is the first football game of the season at school. He's announced that he's taking the day off work so that he don't miss the game because it starts at 3 pm!
He NEVER misses work for the kids! It's always about him and his career. That was always
my responsibility.
If I could only express how he was and how he didn't like me and the kids. I've always
been the one to do all of the parental work. Period!
Is he dying or am I about to get socked with some sort of legal papers suing me for
soul custody?
 
|
| 9/15/2008 7:23:14 PM |
When the EX starts being nice, is it a set up? |
|
wearp1
Steinbach, MB
age: 45
|
Maybe he is just accepting the situation, time will tell, sit back and be
|
| 9/15/2008 7:24:38 PM |
When the EX starts being nice, is it a set up? |
|
znorth
Rockford, MI
age: 36
|
Maybe he wants you back...
|
| 9/15/2008 7:26:06 PM |
When the EX starts being nice, is it a set up? |
|
mtsvx
Missoula, MT
age: 50 online now!
|
He is attempting to work his way back into the family.
Be careful, keep your gaurd up.....
|
| 9/15/2008 7:26:28 PM |
When the EX starts being nice, is it a set up? |
|
ge0ge0
Tallahassee, FL
age: 42 online now!
|
Or maybe he needs to find a place to hide his ill gotten gains? But seriously he might be in a position (mentally, physically, and spiritually) to be able to be a positive factor in your and your children's lives. ???
|
| 9/15/2008 7:42:27 PM |
When the EX starts being nice, is it a set up? |
|
gabisanic
Pleasant Hill, CA
age: 51
|
I agree... keep your guard up. Unless you still have feelings for him and would like to work things out in the distant or not so distant future, beware. Your profile states that you are moving to another State. Perhaps he is doing all these things to block your move (I am guessing you are taking the children with you) by showing the Court he is an involved parent. Perhaps he wants to put you in a position where you will have to choose between moving and the children... leaving wiothout them or having to stay so as to not to lose them.
It is also possible that he has come to realize how painful it was losing you (since you do not mention anything about this I take it he has not admitted it and perhaps never will) and does not want to experience a worse pain by losing his children. Maybe he is realizing that being alone and free is not at all what he imagined and knows he made a big mistake.
I imagine you know him way better than we do. I imagine you have your doubts as to his sincerity or you would not be posting seeking second opinions.
[Edited 9/15/2008 7:45:20 PM]
|
| 9/15/2008 8:02:57 PM |
When the EX starts being nice, is it a set up? |
|
blueyes28
Adger, AL
age: 29
|
Maybe he wants you back...
Thats usually what happens,....the last 3 times for me,didnt worked but it didnt stop them from trying!!!
|
| 9/15/2008 8:06:27 PM |
When the EX starts being nice, is it a set up? |
|
donovaninsurrey
Surrey, BC
age: 39
|
maybe he just wants to be nice to the kids. men are capable of doing that. why do you all think hes trying to get in her pants again? cant a guy just be good to his kids without people thinking theres some alterier motive?
|
| 9/15/2008 8:12:02 PM |
When the EX starts being nice, is it a set up? |
|
powerfemme
Ansonia, CT
age: 42
|
Just ask him! You and all of us could sit here and speculate till the cows come home and HE is the only one who can really answer your question... It is up to you and your experience with him that will tell you if you can believe him or not... Really, folks have to learn to stop playing cat and mouse games and just lay it out on the table... May sound b*tchy to some but how the heck is anyone supposed to know where the other really stands?
Hope this helps hun and good luck
Peace
|
| 9/15/2008 8:21:08 PM |
When the EX starts being nice, is it a set up? |
|
awakeing
Walled Lake, MI
age: 36
|
When you know a person to be one who lies to EVERYONE even about the smallest most insignificant things, you take all they say with a grain of salt. I just stopped listening I guess it's his ACTIONS that are scaring me.
Our oldest is now 12 yrs, that's 12yrs. Plus he's so so so much older than me
there is no reason for an old dog to change.
I know for a fact it's not about wanting me back. If he wanted me he'd run that same
tired player game of trying to seduce. He don't dare touch me. I've noticed the last
3 visits he can't even look me in the eye. He's a man who loves to look you in the
eye and lie to you or threaten you.
Gab, I think you are closest in that he did say once a while back that as the kids get older they will need him more. I think he don't want me taking the kids with me, but
he's not sure he's able to be nurturing enough to have them around all the time. Maybe
testing the waters of being a REAL dad?
OMG I just remembered, I've only seen him cry 3 times in 15 yrs once when his corvette got rear ended, once when he told me a bad story of his childhood, and once when his mother died. Today he cried when he saw our daughter in tears over her red hair because
some of the kids were picking on her for it being red and she wants to dye it brown.
Maybe there is a DAD inside that heart of stone fighting to get out?
|
| 9/15/2008 8:27:10 PM |
When the EX starts being nice, is it a set up? |
|
gabisanic
Pleasant Hill, CA
age: 51
|
Maybe there is a DAD inside that heart of stone fighting to get out?
That would be an extraordinary thing for the children. Just because he was a lousy husband in your eyes may not prevent him from being a better father to his children. Still... beware!
|
| 9/15/2008 8:38:17 PM |
When the EX starts being nice, is it a set up? |
|
sammysammy1
Derby, NY
age: 38
|
He wants a booty call girl
|
| 9/15/2008 8:39:10 PM |
When the EX starts being nice, is it a set up? |
|
harley9482
Fort Wayne, IN
age: 25
|
likely it is alterior and not progressive in good means, but some ex's start being nice sincerely
|
| 9/15/2008 8:44:13 PM |
When the EX starts being nice, is it a set up? |
|
oldeschoolcharm
Monroe, WA
age: 47
|
My bet is that he's showing he's a decent father to not lose visitation rights and to prevent you from relocating them.
Be appreciative for what he actually does, but be very careful as well.
|
| 9/15/2008 8:55:17 PM |
When the EX starts being nice, is it a set up? |
|
indoubt
Beaumont, CA
age: 33
|
Maybe he has a new woman who has children and has done some things for her children to impress her. Maybe he is now feeling guilty he is not doing the same thing for his own kids and is trying to even out the playing field. Maybe he has recently started going to church and has changed his ways. I know what you mean about a man lying about every single thing. My ex is like that and I get the same way when he does something out of the norm. It throws you off guard and makes you wonder what he is up to. I mean if you ask him is he going to tell the truth anyways? Tough situation. I say let the money roll in and take advantage of it while you can. As a mother I know the cost of raising kids all alone with your income and no help from dad. Take some of the money you save and pamper yourself or tuck it away for emergencies. Good luck!
|