| 1/16/2008 7:31:18 PM |
Why do men not hear what you tell them???? |
|
redh_realtor
Cincinnati, OH
age: 30
|
I'm legally seperated from my husband of 1.5 years- we seperated after I found out that he lied to me about everything for the last 3 years. From cashing checks on a closed account, having to go out of state for a funeral of a friend that never even died, to stealing $9000-$100000 out of my checking account.
No matter what I say to him "I want a divorce", "I done", "Don't call me"- he spins it and tells me that we're still together, that we'll be happy again, that it's not over.
I intend to file for divorce right after court for the seperation- in the mean time how can I get him to LEAVE MY ALONE.
HELP!!!!!
Girls- what's worked for you???
Guys- What would you need to hear to leave a girl alone??
|
| 1/16/2008 7:39:07 PM |
Why do men not hear what you tell them???? |
|
kelatious
Lubbock, TX
age: 37
|
Did you say something?
Just jokin, red,
It's not men that don't hear you, it's your husband. Seems like you should get a restraining order. What does your lawyer advise?
|
| 1/16/2008 7:41:11 PM |
Why do men not hear what you tell them???? |
|
steveredman
Spotswood, NJ
age: 37
|
get a good lawyer. then get a restraing order
|
| 1/16/2008 7:44:11 PM |
Why do men not hear what you tell them???? |
|
oldfashionedgrl
Sumner, WA
age: 45
|
I agree...get a lawyer and have him served w/divorce papers. That might send the message. Then again, it might get ugly at that point and then you would need the restraining order. Good luck to you.
|
| 1/16/2008 7:44:14 PM |
Why do men not hear what you tell them???? |
|
redh_realtor
Cincinnati, OH
age: 30
|
Actually I had a restraining order- I had to drop it- no REAL threat were made (at least that's what the court said).
AHHHHHHHHHH
I just want to live my life in peace.....
I don't get it- if we loves me as much as he says he does then why doesn't he want me to be happy (with or without him)??????????
|
| 1/16/2008 7:47:38 PM |
Why do men not hear what you tell them???? |
|
ericr64
Mount Pleasant, MI
age: 43
|
Tell him your brothers going to come kick his ass if he even talks to you again....or someone. Get divorsed as soon as possible. If he really did all that crap, he is a no-good liar and user.
[Edited 1/16/2008 7:48:58 PM]
|
| 1/16/2008 8:56:23 PM |
Why do men not hear what you tell them???? |
|
redh_realtor
Cincinnati, OH
age: 30
|
Thanks all- I can't wait until this is all over....
|
| 1/16/2008 9:02:47 PM |
Why do men not hear what you tell them???? |
|
easygoin68
Crawford, NE
age: 39
|
change your phone number, email. give him your lawyers number. just keep it no contact. worked for me, if it's not about the kids i don't talk to her. hang in there.
|
| 1/16/2008 9:09:46 PM |
Why do men not hear what you tell them???? |
|
tinasdream
Katy, TX
age: 31
|
i have the same issues.i find out more lies everyday.it never ends.hes out of state w some slut and still calls saying we are going to work things out he still loves me.i think if you tell him u r seeing some1 else that might work make it believable
|
| 1/16/2008 9:11:56 PM |
Why do men not hear what you tell them???? |
|
kegleaves
Mount Juliet, TN
age: 29
|
They do they just dont want you to think they do.
|
| 1/16/2008 9:46:07 PM |
Why do men not hear what you tell them???? |
|
like_i_need_one
Bishop, CA
age: 40
|
I would say you have a new man In your life.
your broke and need money.
your pregnant and it's not his.
you slept with his relative.
Or make up something you know will work. any skeletons? did he steal from somebody who never found out? commit a crime that hasn't been solved? if he has a drug conviction or violence that is usually enough to get a protection order. actually just fear is good enough no threat has to be made. lousy judge, try again. dates and times of phone call with 'tone' that scares. actions, must be recent then it is good for 3 years (protection order)
|
| 1/16/2008 9:52:13 PM |
Why do men not hear what you tell them???? |
|
bigeasy741
Bay, AR
age: 45
|
Restraining order are a joke! Hope you didn't have kids together. If I was your brother you'd have no problem;Sticks and stones may break his bones but you'd have no problem.
|
| 1/16/2008 10:34:58 PM |
Why do men not hear what you tell them???? |
|
r_bogdewic
Ellsworth, PA
age: 30
|
It's not what you're saying is wrong, it's what you're doing is wrong. Let me explain for I don't want to piss you off.....hell hath no furry like a woman in scorn....lol
There are 5 stages of grief, any type of grief, whether it's loosing a loved one through death, or divorce. To me, I think divorce is harder than death because that person is still out there and that is enough hope to hold onto.
Step one-Denial
The person suffering the grief will be in denial that this is over.
Step two-anger(blaming)
The person will be angry (not with only you, but everyone around). The person in grief will find fault with whatever circumstance someone had a played part in the loss (no matter how small the part being played)
Step three-barganing
The person in grief will try to bargain with you (or death itself). The person in grief will try and bargain with actions like "I'll do this, and it'll make it all better", or maybe I can avoid this by doing this (making up for what went wrong to create the loss in the first place)
Step four-depression
The person will ultimately and inevetiably become depressed. The person does not want the loss at all to happen, and may become suicidal (depending on the person)
Step five-acceptance
The person in grief will accept that this is finally time to come to be.
Now, you have to ask yourself if you want to see a loved one (or someone you once loved) to go through all this. Is it really worth all this trouble to see him go through all this, or would it be easier to just "work it out"?
If you are still ready to move on, then allow the person to go through these stages of grief. The more interaction you play a part in, the longer it will take him to go through these stages.
Think of it as a ruberband. You hold a rubberband between two hands. Pull one end of the rubberband, the other snaps back to the place of less resistance. You are one end, and he is the other end. This is a natural part of life you have to live with, and live it well, if you want this over for good. It just has to be. I'm sorry there is no easier way to handle this, but life ain't easy.
|
| 1/16/2008 10:43:03 PM |
Why do men not hear what you tell them???? |
|
howaboutme22
Madisonville, TX
age: 22
|
OK everyone has great answers.  So lets try telling him that you have some kind of disease and hopefully if he is lucky he may not have gotten it already!
In all reality if he is determined to keep bothering you, then I hate to tell you but he is going to do it whether you are divorced or not. It is going to be hard to control yourself as well, meaning to not go cookoo on him!!
You just have to show him that no matter what he does or says that you are going to move on with you life nomatter what!
Eventually he will get the picture and if not I say hire a hit man!!!!! HAHA Just kidding!!
Good luck and be careful cause there are those crazies out there!! 
|
| 1/16/2008 10:54:08 PM |
Why do men not hear what you tell them???? |
|
dmrcowboy
Florissant, MO
age: 47
|
Hang in there sweet stuff, your gonna be on a wild roller coaster ride for a while. On a good note theres plenty of great men on POF, keep looking til ya find a good on.
|