jemstar322
Augusta, ME
39, joined Jan. 2011
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When I talk to someone who is obviously not a match, IE:
1. We have nothing in common
2. Your life situation is one I don't want to be a part of
(You have 8 kids and live in your Grandma's basement)
3. You don't fit my preferences
(This doesn't mean you're unattractive, we all have preferences and you know it)
4. You really could be a jerk and have no idea about it
Okay, so when I am being as nice as possible in telling you no thanks why do you.....?
1. Keep persisting, if I am interested in you I will say so if I say no thanks honey we're not a match, then just let it go, find someone else!!
2. Get rude and say you know why I'm single, etc. First of all, being a d*ck won't make me change my mind, it only makes you look like a d*ck. Second, you don't know me or my situation, being judgmental gets you nowhere.
3. Give me a guilt trip and try to convince me you're a selfless person or doing me a favor.
You're not. We're just not a match, I should know, I've known me a long time!
Ok, I know I went all out writing this and I probably sound like a seahag and I'm sorry, all I really want to know is: How do I say NO without hurting anyone's feelings, making them doubt their self-worth or making an enemy out of a stranger that I would prefer would stay a stranger?
Guys, help out here. There are TONS of ladies on this site having this same problem.
Thank you
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dougiem
Richmond, KY
37, joined Aug. 2009
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Just don't reply.
Tada!
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roth207
Auburn, ME
51, joined Jan. 2011
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Dougiem's response is simple but a good one. Unfortunately there are too many jerks out there. If someone tells me thanks but no thanks I leave it at that and move along.
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