| 3/26/2008 7:59:22 PM |
A little help ladies... |
|
harley68
San Antonio, TX
age: 39
|
When a man treats a woman like shit, why is it so hard for her to walk away?
My friend has a friend who stays at her house, drinks her beer, eats her food, sleeps with her and is jealous of her kids.
But yet she thinks he is the one for her because of the way he makes her feel when their alone. I don't get it how we get so clueless when it comes to men.
I know NOT ALL WOMEN do this! But a lot of us do. Or we find the men who have lied to us and we know damn well they lied but we still want them. AGAIN for the way they make us feel when we're alone with them.
So ladies - I ask you how have YOU walked away from the asshole in your past relationships? 
Men - you are welcomed to put your 2cents too!!
[Edited 3/26/2008 8:17:07 PM]
|
| 3/26/2008 8:05:24 PM |
A little help ladies... |
|
juniebegood
Huntington, NY
age: 53
|
Great post, good question! I'm guessing that your friend needs a boost in her self-esteem. I think if she felt better about herself, she'd dump the loser. She needs to know, that sometimes it's better to be alone, than to be stuck with a guy like that. Being alone isn't the worst thing in the world. She needs to work on her self-confidence, then hopefully, her pride will kick in, and she'll realize that she deserves someone who will treat her better. She has to really feel way down deep in her soul, that she's worth having someone better in her life.
|
| 3/26/2008 8:07:52 PM |
A little help ladies... |
|
harley68
San Antonio, TX
age: 39
|
Exactly!! Thanks junie!!
|
| 3/26/2008 8:10:18 PM |
A little help ladies... |
|
tulsatoby
Carthage, MO
age: 44
|
I know I am not supposed to post on here but here we go!I just cant figure it out either because I have always treated lady as such LADYS!But you know I cant figure it out their will be on of their old boyfriend show back up that I have been hearing about how they are such asshold and treated them like shit and run them down infront of friends and family I Just cant figure it out because they will go right back to the ASSHOLE!I guess I just need to change my ways and become a asshole but I just cant do it! Hi Harley!
|
| 3/26/2008 8:11:40 PM |
A little help ladies... |
|
dutchboy4u
Huntington Beach, CA
age: 44
|
She sounds needy and afraid to strike out on her own. She's probably afraid she won't find a better man. She's got the idea that a man in the bed is better than no man at all.
Come on Harley! Why did you exclude us guys from this thread?
[Edited 3/26/2008 8:12:54 PM]
|
| 3/26/2008 8:16:30 PM |
A little help ladies... |
|
harley68
San Antonio, TX
age: 39
|
I'm sorry dutch - men can reply.
|
| 3/26/2008 8:18:50 PM |
A little help ladies... |
|
passionplay1975
Arlington, TX
age: 32
|
Nice replies, however, the question still is not being answered, how do you walk away from the situation????
|
| 3/26/2008 8:20:22 PM |
A little help ladies... |
|
simplman4right1
Sarasota, FL
age: 51
|
I'm no lady... hell I never even played one on TV
But I guess this all goes back to the dreaded bad boy syndrome???
Some people are just attracted to people that everyone else can clearly see they are *bad* for them.
There's been times in my life I wished I could be like this guy... but I'll be damned if I ever have, could or would act like him.
Harley... from what you've already posted I'm guessing you and your friends have already talked to your friend but she's staying with this "winner"
But knowing what little I do about the human (male) psyche.... I would be willing to wager good money this "relationship" turns into a physical (not in a good way) and confrontational situation.
Frankly, I couldn't mooch off of anyone without getting frustrated.... add in the fact he's jealous of her *children*???
Man.... combine those 2 emotions.... add alcohol and/or drugs... and I can promise there will be late nite/early morning 911 calls.
Her best bet is to simply ask him to leave....
No argument(s) no options.
Maybe staying at a friend/relative's place for a couple days to avoid confrontation and allow him to pack his chit and get???
I dunno.. never been in that position.
But it surely doesn't sound healthy.
|
| 3/26/2008 8:27:27 PM |
A little help ladies... |
|
harley68
San Antonio, TX
age: 39
|
Let me set the record straight. He does not LIVE with her nor is he violent or aggressive with her. He has his own place. He wouldn't hurt her like that. He's just using her in my opinion.
|
| 3/26/2008 8:29:44 PM |
A little help ladies... |
|
bjrea
Woodway, TX
age: 58
|
Its a matter of a lack of self esteem on the lady's part. Some how the guy has convinced her that she has no other recourse than to stay with him. Eventually she will have enough, but it will have to be her decision. I just hope she doesn't wait too long.
|
| 3/26/2008 8:31:16 PM |
A little help ladies... |
|
belle37
Gurdon, AR
age: 37
|
some one needs to point out her kids come before the man ,then herself
if he doesnt like kids shouldnt be around them
and if she needs help asking him to leave call sheriff dept and explain that she is scared he will lose it or harm her .if hes an asshole like that ,self center he will try to intimediate her ,but just look at self being and fact need total happiness and not just in bedroom
after wards dress up go out and be proud of herself ,enjoy kids ,friends and dont look back
if he calls pick it up just enough to hollar leave me alone and hang up ,dont listen just hollar
|
| 3/26/2008 8:31:34 PM |
A little help ladies... |
|
dutchboy4u
Huntington Beach, CA
age: 44
|
Walking away is EASY! First make up your mind, then plan your actions and stick to them.
Turn around and start stepping! Never look back! Walk off into YOUR future! It has to be better than getting shit on all the time. Even being alone is better than being in a belittling relationship.
If your man doesn't build you up and is constantly tearing you down, you don't need that abusive guy in your life. Yes, you should make him aware of the problem and give him a chance to fix it. If he doesn't improve, START STEPPING!
Sorry HARLEY! Didn't see the part that said us guys could put our
 2 cents in!
|
| 3/26/2008 8:32:55 PM |
A little help ladies... |
|
simplman4right1
Sarasota, FL
age: 51
|
Let me set the record straight. He does not LIVE with her nor is he violent or aggressive with her. He has his own place. He wouldn't hurt her like that. He's just using her in my opinion.
Why didn't you say that to begin with??
In that case.... I have less than no frikkin idea why she allows him to use her.
I doubt she'll listen to reasoning so I would suggest letting the relationship run it's course.
Hopefully she'll come to her senses
[Edited 3/26/2008 8:34:53 PM]
|
| 3/26/2008 8:35:19 PM |
A little help ladies... |
|
dutchboy4u
Huntington Beach, CA
age: 44
|
He's probably using her as a sex puppy HARLEY. All he wants is her body, not any part of her life. Sounds like a sex buddy deal to me. At least on the guy's end.
|
| 3/26/2008 8:35:35 PM |
A little help ladies... |
|
luvzhugz12
Richardson, TX
age: 42
|
JMO but sometimes when you first meet the 'bad' boys they are fun and exciting, like spontaneous activities and the likes. Whereas the nice guys are low key, more quiet and although in the long run probably much better for us don't always give us that sense of excitement. Sadly, that 'fun' guy is short lived and you quickly find out what an asshole he is, but by then you have attachment issues. Mind you, this is just my view based on past experiences.
Maybe not all women choose these men for the same reason, but I do know for me, I'm learning that the 'nice' guy may be a little more low keyed but longer lasting...more like a slow burn 
|