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4/22/2014 5:42:17 PM Creating a joint custody plan  

want2bnlove2013
Fort Wayne, IN
38, joined Apr. 2013


I don't think I've posted here before so I apologize I'd this has been discussed. I'm looking for different options for joint custody. Anyone willing to share what works for them?




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4/23/2014 2:24:21 PM Creating a joint custody plan  

lynyrd80
Over 2,000 Posts (2,926)
Wood River, NE
55, joined Jan. 2014


Be careful with joint custody. Child support is different. The actual costs are shared, but you will need to prove the expenses. The most important thing is the visitation.
The kids still need both parents, unless he is a REALLY bad influence. If you block visitation you risk contempt of court.

4/23/2014 8:49:28 PM Creating a joint custody plan  

want2bnlove2013
Fort Wayne, IN
38, joined Apr. 2013


He's not violent to the kids. Verbally and emotionally abusive to me for certain, but there is a reason I'm no longer with him. I don't plan on keeping the kids from him. He's not had anything to really do with my 11 month old daughter, but now he's wanting everything. I agree that the kids need both parents. I just feel like he's going to take advantage of it. I'm looking for something fair for all involved (me, him and the two kids).

4/24/2014 12:11:13 AM Creating a joint custody plan  

lynyrd80
Over 2,000 Posts (2,926)
Wood River, NE
55, joined Jan. 2014


I tried the "be fair" thing, it doesn't work real well. Try to get something you both can agree on. Above all get a good lawyer.

4/27/2014 8:59:14 AM Creating a joint custody plan  

zimzane2
Over 10,000 Posts!!! (25,757)
High Point, NC
56, joined Jan. 2013


Quote from want2bnlove2013:
I don't think I've posted here before so I apologize I'd this has been discussed. I'm looking for different options for joint custody. Anyone willing to share what works for them?




I thought the court decides that.

4/27/2014 1:12:44 PM Creating a joint custody plan  

want2bnlove2013
Fort Wayne, IN
38, joined Apr. 2013


Quote from zimzane2:
I thought the court decides that.


We are trying to do it with as little forthe court to decide as possible.

4/27/2014 1:15:08 PM Creating a joint custody plan  

want2bnlove2013
Fort Wayne, IN
38, joined Apr. 2013


Quote from debyduz:
Unless you have good reason joint custody is the way to go. If you try to go for sole custody it will delay the divorce. I had my ex in a spot where he had no choice except to agree to sole custody, but my lawyer recommended against it because it would slow up the divorce. So I took her recommendation. Divorce went right through. About a year ago he was being annoying and I was sorry I did that, but then stuff settled. He is in a situation of his own doing that he doesn't use all his time anymore. I have never told him he could not see the kids. They have asked me to tell them they don't want go because he didn't have heat last winter. He has not see them many times because of weather or no car.

Our original agreement was every other weekend and 2 evenings during the week. He tried to use that in support court to pay less money and the guy pointed it out to him that he didn't even have them 1/3 of the time. The agreement worked well until he moved farther.


I would love sole custody but I feel they need their father in their life. We've done joint custody with my son for over 15 months. Now that my daughter is almost a year old and their father is changing shifts at work he wants to change the plan.