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| 7/13/2016 6:05:12 PM |
7 Years Today |
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lovethelake17
Henderson, NV
58, joined May. 2009
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Today is 7 years since my husband died. Our daughter was 7, so from this day forward, he will have been gone for longer than she had him.
It's weird, because in some sense it seems so very long ago and some of it is like a myth or a legend, but some of it is fresh as if it just happened and I'm still trying to make sense of it. I remember all the details of the day leading up to his death and all the details of this day, too. I remember all that was said and all that was done.
I thought that might fade a little, but it seems it will not.
I understand so much better now some of the other widow/ers in my family. I wish I'd been a little more empathetic.
Are there dates that stand out clearly in your memories, too?
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| 7/16/2016 4:09:52 PM |
7 Years Today |
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whistlerblue
Lancaster, CA
59, joined Jun. 2010
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Today is 7 years since my husband died. Our daughter was 7, so from this day forward, he will have been gone for longer than she had him.
It's weird, because in some sense it seems so very long ago and some of it is like a myth or a legend, but some of it is fresh as if it just happened and I'm still trying to make sense of it. I remember all the details of the day leading up to his death and all the details of this day, too. I remember all that was said and all that was done.
I thought that might fade a little, but it seems it will not.
I understand so much better now some of the other widow/ers in my family. I wish I'd been a little more empathetic.
Are there dates that stand out clearly in your memories, too?
Yes, August 24 will be 7 years for me also. We bought a new home in 2004 and I have lived here alone longer than we lived here together. September 16 is our anniversary and January 22 is her birthday. I don't go to work on any of those days. If it's a weekend, great. If not, I take a personal or vacation day. Yes, sometimes it seems so long ago and other times as vivid as it happened yesterday. I remember our last conversation and how much we loved each other. We were fortunate in one aspect--- we got to say good bye to each other.
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| 7/16/2016 7:12:07 PM |
7 Years Today |
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lovethelake17
Henderson, NV
58, joined May. 2009
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That is fortunate. We didn't get that--to say goodbye to each other. I often wonder if he was able to ever understand what we said to him. I really hope so. He was in a coma for three months before he died.
Was it hard staying in the home your purchased? I mean because of memories. We had moved to a new city shortly before his death and we didn't really build up many memories here together. I also wonder about if when I go home to visit how it will be as I go to places that were "ours". The last time I was home, I didn't have time to go past our old house, or any of our favorite places.
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| 7/17/2016 11:22:10 PM |
7 Years Today |
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whistlerblue
Lancaster, CA
59, joined Jun. 2010
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That is fortunate. We didn't get that--to say goodbye to each other. I often wonder if he was able to ever understand what we said to him. I really hope so. He was in a coma for three months before he died.
I have been told that even in a coma or unconscious, they can hear us even if they can't respond.
Was it hard staying in the home your purchased? I mean because of memories. We had moved to a new city shortly before his death and we didn't really build up many memories here together. I also wonder about if when I go home to visit how it will be as I go to places that were "ours". The last time I was home, I didn't have time to go past our old house, or any of our favorite places.
No, it was a little hard at first but then I realized that the majority of our marriage and almost all of our really good memories were at our previous two homes. We had been married 21 years when we purchased this home. We moved from our previous home because the neighborhood changed.
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| 7/19/2016 11:04:26 PM |
7 Years Today |
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heart_and_soul3
Sarasota, FL
59, joined Aug. 2014
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The 23rd of this month will be 6 1/2 years since his death. The time goes by quickly now--so unlike the beginning, when I counted the hours, days, months--then years. I get what you are saying about sometimes it feels like a dream--it does to me too. For me, the memories of his illness and death--are now replaced with the good memories.
My 57th birthday was weird for me--cause I was now older than he was when he died.
He was in a coma for the last few hours of his life. From what the doctors and the nurses told me--the last sense to go is the hearing. I am sure he heard you Lake.
Whistler--I am the opposite--I stay busy on the anniversaries and birthdays.
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| 7/20/2016 12:34:38 AM |
7 Years Today |
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whistlerblue
Lancaster, CA
59, joined Jun. 2010
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The 23rd of this month will be 6 1/2 years since his death. The time goes by quickly now--so unlike the beginning, when I counted the hours, days, months--then years. I get what you are saying about sometimes it feels like a dream--it does to me too. For me, the memories of his illness and death--are now replaced with the good memories.
My 57th birthday was weird for me--cause I was now older than he was when he died.
He was in a coma for the last few hours of his life. From what the doctors and the nurses told me--the last sense to go is the hearing. I am sure he heard you Lake.
Whistler--I am the opposite--I stay busy on the anniversaries and birthdays.
Oh I stay busy on those days! I just don't go to work! Many times I will go visit a special place we used to like or I'll make a special dinner. I observe the day in happy memories. Work is not a place to have happy memories.
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| 7/21/2016 7:37:08 AM |
7 Years Today |
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cupocheer
Assumption, IL
68, joined May. 2010
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| 11/8/2016 3:49:30 AM |
7 Years Today |
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mustangwriter
Boerne, TX
56, joined Nov. 2009
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Today is 7 years since my husband died. Our daughter was 7, so from this day forward, he will have been gone for longer than she had him.
Are there dates that stand out clearly in your memories, too?
Oh....I've done that; start measuring time that way.
And yes, I think we take on our children's pain. What good parent wouldn't.
For me its trying to see things through her eyes...like:...'What an incredible sunset/sunrise. "Karen" would've really liked this sunset/sunrise.'
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| 12/4/2016 5:55:02 AM |
7 Years Today |
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rainydaze48
Columbus, OH
52, joined Jun. 2015
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The entire holiday season is always tough.
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| 2/22/2017 6:23:28 AM |
7 Years Today |
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heresed60
Louisville, KY
57, joined May. 2016
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Today is four years since my Rita passed. I miss her every day.
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