| 6/15/2008 10:39:54 PM |
Must the man be the one to pursue? |
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mariafromromani
Portland, OR
age: 40
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It is about what you want in a man, not what a man wants in you....
That should apply in all your pursuits.
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| 6/15/2008 11:23:07 PM |
Must the man be the one to pursue? |
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singleagain50
Greenville, SC
age: 50
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Now I know what happened to a couple of women that I've dated in the past. We always had a good time while we were together. But they never called, never returned calls and always had to have 2-3 days notice to even go to lunch. My work schedule can change daily. If somebody gets injured, sick or is on vacation, I'm the one that has to cover for them. So, sometimes even I don't have 2-3 days notice when my days off are gonna be. I dumped them because it appeared to me that they weren't interested enough to be a little flexible on when we could see each other. But know I see that THEY READ THAT BOOK !!
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| 6/16/2008 12:26:03 AM |
Must the man be the one to pursue? |
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tx38austin
Dallas, TX
age: 38
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It is about what you want in a man, not what a man wants in you....
That should apply in all your pursuits.
Don't you mean, what you want and what you're going to get are entirely two different things?
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| 6/16/2008 5:38:51 AM |
Must the man be the one to pursue? |
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thebestman
Alpharetta, GA
age: 34
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Thanks, but you guys have me more confused than ever.
How's this; In the beginning,the guy might be the instigator, and things fall into balance as they progress. From that point,the person who seems to be the least of the two interested should be the one to call. In other words, man or woman, if you feel you are the one more interested, let the other person set the pace. Why must this be so difficult? But what do I know?
I agree. What happens is that many people play the phone game, the three day rule, etc... Playing games and getting too caught up in rules doesn't benefit, it hinders progress.
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| 6/16/2008 6:09:57 AM |
Must the man be the one to pursue? |
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ferrari348
Milford, OH
age: 46
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Really...who gives two chits about initiation as long as it gets done? Phone games, advance notice rules...what kind of crap is that. Bust out the re-runs of Leave it to Beaver...that author appears to like that time period. Unfortunately it's 2008 not 1958.
If I get a response like that? C-Ya' For the OP...life is short might as well live large.
Personally I like assertive women (not aggressive)...they know what they want and they go for it. What's the issue with that? Your not a child and the person you are attracted too (unless you are a cougar ) probably aren't either.
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| 6/16/2008 6:10:21 AM |
Must the man be the one to pursue? |
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zcrgm
Windsor, ON
age: 49
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Yes, they sure can Flowergirl. But I guess men probably think the same way about us.
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| 6/16/2008 6:25:08 AM |
Must the man be the one to pursue? |
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misbhavin08
Big Rapids, MI
age: 26
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I am very new to dating. I'll zoom through the Publix parking lot with a cart full of groceries like a little kid on a scooter. But dating GAMES? PLAYING hard to get? Should I never call a guy I like? I recently met an author of a book about dating,and yes,I bought her book, and I was quite amazed with the advice. Never drive to a man's house to pick him up for a date? Don't call a guy, even if it's a missed call? Don't accept a date if he didn't call, like, two days in advance?
Gentlemen, please be honest, would you prefer to be in charge of the flow? Is the PURSUIT such an important part of your experience of dating?
Ladies, has being too assertive ever been a negative in your dating?
What year is this, and will it always be the same?
alot of men wont admit it but they like to be pursued just as a female loves to be chased as well.. so get out there and start asking and dancing away and good luck
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| 6/16/2008 6:47:37 AM |
Must the man be the one to pursue? |
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jaysinsp
Rowlett, TX
age: 36
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the games just be you If you want to call Call The games is what jacks everything up i think
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| 6/16/2008 6:49:42 AM |
Must the man be the one to pursue? |
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deano1234
Pierson, IA
age: 44
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You can't fall in love by reading a book. Just like you can't raise children by reading a book. Do you hide the book in the bathroom and go read what to do next? Every situation is different.
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| 6/16/2008 6:52:08 AM |
Must the man be the one to pursue? |
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judit0606
Big Stone Gap, VA
age: 51
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 Jay's right about that!!!
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| 6/16/2008 8:27:42 AM |
Must the man be the one to pursue? |
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breeze341
Denver, CO
age: 41
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Oh my,
Now I see why online chats become so appealing. A lady in Australia, a gentlemen in Hawaii?
I am so used to being straight forwarded , I just don't feel I can play these games. I feel a good guy would see right through them...
A good guy would see right through the games. Be straight foward and honest. They will know where you stand and if they are honest and straight forward with you...you will know where they stand. I makes it easier that way.
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| 6/16/2008 8:36:58 AM |
Must the man be the one to pursue? |
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mrcareful2001
Chittenango, NY
age: 46
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Salsa, and other ladies...BY all MEANS Call!!...the days of the lady waiting by the phone to ring(or computer to say, "You've got mail") are long gone....IF I contact a lady, and go through the "whole ritual"...I still feel 'doubts" or hesitation even up to and concluding a 1st date...afterall, I feel she may well be being "romanced" by several others at the same time....
BUT when a lady makes the initial contact...It is a completely different "feel" a feel that "OK..this lady has expressed a interest in me"...so that is a far more "comfortable" way to take this initial steps...I/we know that it takes a effort for the lady to reach out...so...It cerainly flatters me when THEY make the effort.
and oh yes...salsa, breeze341, gonesailingbabe, jill46...my e-mails is....: johns0719 @.......
[Edited 6/16/2008 8:39:51 AM]
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| 6/16/2008 8:39:23 AM |
Must the man be the one to pursue? |
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breeze341
Denver, CO
age: 41
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Thanks, but you guys have me more confused than ever.
How's this; In the beginning,the guy might be the instigator, and things fall into balance as they progress. From that point,the person who seems to be the least of the two interested should be the one to call. In other words, man or woman, if you feel you are the one more interested, let the other person set the pace. Why must this be so difficult? But what do I know?
I agree. What happens is that many people play the phone game, the three day rule, etc... Playing games and getting too caught up in rules doesn't benefit, it hinders progress.
I agree with bestman...just DON'T make yourself appear as needy. That will send the guy in the other direction.
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| 6/16/2008 8:39:52 AM |
Must the man be the one to pursue? |
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justlaidback
Lubbock, TX
age: 53
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I haven't been in a relation in some time, but I was at one time and I liked the cat and mouse tactics where both would persue at turns, why this way is because it give both time to see where it's going and if theres interests on both sides. I don't like being forced into being the only one to show you're interested. It's being equal, the same I hoped this helped out.
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| 6/16/2008 8:58:26 AM |
Must the man be the one to pursue? |
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wolfi
Albuquerque, NM
age: 43
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I haven't read that book, but from what I've heard, sounds like a crock to me.
Yes, if the guy is interested, he will continue chasing you - BUT ONLY TO A POINT.
Exactly how soon that point is reached will depend on the individual guy.
Regardless of how attractive you may be or in what ways, there comes a point where any guy will just say f*** it and move on.
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