Are you in requirement mode,that prevents your dating,or relationship?

3/6/2015 5:50:40 AM	Are you in requirement mode,that prevents your dating,or relationship?
aladytoo Monroe, WI 61, joined Apr. 2006	Over the years,i'm guessing most have written or chatted on phone,to someone you'd like to date. Have you found that requirements put you at loss for dating. This topic is not to bash men or woman PLEASE. Nor is for calling people out that post. Please view all replies constructive for only the person posting. One thing that stops me from dating,is liberal partners.To me that means great risk,not only health but heartache also.I chose not to be on a revolving shoe rack. Meet singles at DateHookup.dating, we're 100% free! Join now!
3/6/2015 6:26:35 AM	Are you in requirement mode,that prevents your dating,or relationship?
deneez Rochester, MI 58, joined Apr. 2012	As in location could be problematic, not impossible, but a deterrent. This site has become more of a social network for me, than dating site. There are a few I write to, discussion on weather, forums, movies, a recent post, just about anything, I look forward to it. I'm not looking to 'date' but a cup of coffee is not out of the question inasmuch as I could do the same outside of this site as well. I had lunch with the social worker at work yesterday and it was really nice...difference being, he's not on the radar as a relationship prospect. Requirements (fundamental ones) for dating if I chose to do so wouldn't necessarily prevent, more like 'narrowed' a potential mate. That's how I roll. glad you said no bashing...makes it more inviting.
3/6/2015 10:03:48 AM	Are you in requirement mode,that prevents your dating,or relationship?
cinnamonnhaze Minneapolis, MN 73, joined Apr. 2014	^^^^ I agree with both. I have told several men that I WILL NOT be a "side dish on the dating buffet". My location is also a bit of a problem. I always have to check in on the farm. When I get here I don't usually want to make the 75 mile trip back to the cities & I also won't give out my location to people I barely know. I've been physically separated from my husband for over 2 years. We were living separate lives for the last 5 years we lived together, but the economy made it impossible for us to live separately. When hubby first moved out I was soooo excited to start dating again & move on with my life. Then I started to realize what I had to sift through to find a somewhat "normal" man & it just started to seem like a 2nd (disappointing) job hunt, so I've decided (for now) that I don't want to look for a "2nd job". Also, at my age, men are also at a place where they have their own restrictions. Jobs, children, grandchildren, etc. They can't just uproot either & I completely understand. I'm content. I enjoy my life. I can laugh at my struggles & I can relish in my accomplishments as I learn more & more new things. I have found so many new women friends of all ages & backgrounds. I learn so much from these wonderful women & hopefully I can spread some wisdom along the way. If Mr. Right is out there, I'll stumble across him. It would just be a pity to be attached to Mr. Right Now if Mr. Right were to come along....
3/6/2015 2:54:04 PM	Are you in requirement mode,that prevents your dating,or relationship?
texasgirl_1978 Grapevine, TX 39, joined Sep. 2013	I don't have many requirements that prevent me from dating. However, I do have circumstances that make it harder to date. It's hard to date while still living with your parents not by choice. My disability makes it really hard. Not being able to work or drive because of disabilty.
3/6/2015 6:36:43 PM	Are you in requirement mode,that prevents your dating,or relationship?
shezakeeper_2 San Antonio, TX 63, joined Jul. 2013	Distance can be a major problem for me, because I have been treated poorly by long distance relationships it is very rare (but not impossible) for me to even entertain the idea of getting to know someone if they don't live close. I have dated men that are well off and those not so much, it's the heart I look to and if they are seeing my heart as well.
3/6/2015 7:06:08 PM	Are you in requirement mode,that prevents your dating,or relationship?
reenie4 Milwaukee, WI 60, joined Dec. 2007	I don't believe so, I know what I want in a relationship and not I am not going to settle for just anyone. If that means I may never meet the person to share my life with... then that's just fine with me.
3/8/2015 11:19:25 AM	Are you in requirement mode,that prevents your dating,or relationship?
packersbabe920 Green Bay, WI 52, joined Jul. 2013	No, just want someone who on the same page as me and I haven't gotten that yet, all I gotten is looking for sex so I'm not with all that, sorry but I'm not a revolving door u won't be going in, or out on me
3/8/2015 9:02:39 PM	Are you in requirement mode,that prevents your dating,or relationship?
cinnamonnhaze Minneapolis, MN 73, joined Apr. 2014	Quote from packersbabe920: ...... sorry but I'm not a revolving door u won't be going in, or out..... Love this statement!!!
3/8/2015 9:29:52 PM	Are you in requirement mode,that prevents your dating,or relationship?
cupocheer Assumption, IL 68, joined May. 2010	Babe I acknowledge that I may be in a requirement mode as far as dating goes. And That requirement is engrained in my personality. My personality is a trait I was born with. I cannot change my personality for the sake of being a prospect for a man. On the dating scene. All any of you see of my personality is what you read on these Internet white pages. That is not a true characterization of the total me nor of my complete personality. Some choose to travel on one plane And make judgement calls about another only from what they perceive from what they read. My personality, developed through many years as a strong, aggressive female causes many to view me in a way which is completely unfair and unjustified. Until one knows one on a personal basis and in real life can one develop a fair understanding of the person they are associating with. Women, on this site, may feel as if I am many things which I am not in real life. That is their problem, not an issue I have to address about myself. Being called names of less than savory characterization labels the one saying the rude, crude, and slanderous words -- not myself. women, I feel, feel threatened by my personality because they would like to be more like me, are jealous of me for some unknown reason, or are so insecure in themselves that they feel a need to attack me in order to maintain their slot on the conveyor belt Internet dating. Men, on the other hand, give me the distinct impression that they are intimidated by a strong female type and therefore choose to cower in the darkness, often throwing barbs and poison darts at me, when it is their own weakness which they actually fear. It would take one hell (sorry ladies) of a man to meet me toe-to-toe on a neutral playing field. I would not want him to change anything about himself but I require the same consideration in return. What I do have a requirement about is that any relationship which may ensue is one of unconditional consideration. I will never bend in my resolve to be be whom I am by virtue of being myself. Any man who would even consider dating me best be forewarned that I can give as well as I receive, my skin fits my body frame just fine and isn't thin when it comes to holding my own. Additionally, any man who chose to date me be very surprised, I believe, to know that he would be treated as much like a king if a relationship developed -- as long as he treated me with respect, truth and honesty. And I can cook! Having said all that ... At my age I have no hopes and dreams of ever having to worry about finding a man to date. They (men) can't get past my outspoken, truthfulness. [Edited 3/8/2015 9:30:55 PM ]
3/9/2015 6:16:48 PM	Are you in requirement mode,that prevents your dating,or relationship?
packersbabe920 Green Bay, WI 52, joined Jul. 2013	Thanks Cinn & cheer Well said cheer
3/10/2015 4:36:38 AM	Are you in requirement mode,that prevents your dating,or relationship?
aladytoo Monroe, WI 61, joined Apr. 2006	It's nice to find woman who respect themself first.Even tho some set expections high,odds are there are men with same views.Always takes time to weed threw the ruff of it all. As Packer mentioned don't get caught in the revolving door.
3/14/2015 1:15:10 AM	Are you in requirement mode,that prevents your dating,or relationship?
pickygirl72 Picher, OK 47, joined Sep. 2011	Too picky I guess. I will not settle just to be with any joe blow.
3/14/2015 7:32:19 PM	Are you in requirement mode,that prevents your dating,or relationship?
leasurelady Barberton, OH 60, joined Oct. 2014	Better not to be in a relationship then to be in a bad one. Been there done that.
3/15/2015 5:44:00 AM	Are you in requirement mode,that prevents your dating,or relationship?
aladytoo Monroe, WI 61, joined Apr. 2006	ahh when you make no changes in yourself, why would you expect a man to. You can stay with your convictions,but this world is not perfect by any means. If I wanted a man 6'2 and a 5'10 came along,do I buy him hi heals?? I hope you see my point.
3/15/2015 12:43:21 PM	Are you in requirement mode,that prevents your dating,or relationship?
deneez Rochester, MI 58, joined Apr. 2012	Media trained beauty is nuts. First beauty was twiggy, now its curves, next year back to twiggy. I mention this because on the internet the first thing we note is the physical, and I wonder how many rule out people on that initial criteria alone. I've had a few surprises as to the depth of character a few exhibit that by media standards are no Brad Pitt, and I'm always taken back by the 'beautiful' one that is hand in hand with the 'beast'...my imagination runs wild with what someone saw in that person, bet it's their heart, or their character, the way they love, but what belongs to someone else isn't mine to know, I can only imagine. Also, how much would those of our age be willing to sacrifice? Living alone I'm quiet, unless I am talking to my grandchildren or adult children, when I'm home from work 'quiet' is a gift that I look forward to all day. Would I need to provide someone with constant gab? I can't do it. There is one where I work that does her job and talks about it while she is doing it, literally talking out loud to the computer. She even asks it questions, lol...of course 'we' answer, as we help one another along the way...but it drives me craaaaazzzzzyyyyy!..my sanity: kindness. even if I bite my tongue in doing it...but I tell ya, I couldn't live with it! I'm set in my age now, and I realize it, I even struggle with is very possible the inevitable. There might not be another.
3/25/2015 5:11:09 AM	Are you in requirement mode,that prevents your dating,or relationship?
aladytoo Monroe, WI 61, joined Apr. 2006	When reading over some of the replies,it makes me look at myself more,with comments you ladies have posted. Most of us are single,not in a relationship,for our own reasons. I have been told i'm not approachable because they thought I was hi maintainance or they felt insecure about themself. I can't change what people think with out them saying hello.Just maybe looking at a pic doesn't tell the story who the person is.Better to be well read then,relying on an image. I laugh when some of the shy ones say hello,because they have a stronger interest then the bold.As well in my finding I tend to see more common grounds.
3/25/2015 12:20:54 PM	Are you in requirement mode,that prevents your dating,or relationship?
packersbabe920 Green Bay, WI 52, joined Jul. 2013	Ones that do want to date, stay so far and I don't think I got patience for that
3/26/2015 12:14:42 PM	Are you in requirement mode,that prevents your dating,or relationship?
rose1206 Gilbert, AZ 36, joined Jul. 2012	Quote from packersbabe920: Ones that do want to date, stay so far and I don't think I got patience for that Story of my life haha, they are too far from me.
3/27/2015 5:12:32 AM	Are you in requirement mode,that prevents your dating,or relationship?
aladytoo Monroe, WI 61, joined Apr. 2006	I know distance stops many people from dating.And no one want a internet,phone relationship. This maybe a topic both men and woman should consider before being on internet dating,or at least post in your profile. I have dated 2 people over 11 yrs that were long distance over 1000 miles.Both were willing to travel, as well as I did also.Dating is no free ride.Also you have to both consider moving if you want it to work.If you truly feel it can work,and it has been working.Consider who's more flexable for moving.Kids,grandkids,family is not who you'll live your life out with.
3/27/2015 10:33:11 PM	Are you in requirement mode,that prevents your dating,or relationship?
24milkduds Vallejo, CA 58, joined Mar. 2012	I don't think I'm in requirement mode, but most of the men's requirement are hefty...I back up and think "are they serious", and these men are in my age range.. I work long hours, then babysit my grandkids until my baby is on her feet..it seems men want their woman home when they get home..,dating is tough!
3/28/2015 7:11:12 AM	Are you in requirement mode,that prevents your dating,or relationship?
aladytoo Monroe, WI 61, joined Apr. 2006	Quote from 24milkduds: I don't think I'm in requirement mode, but most of the men's requirement are hefty...I back up and think "are they serious", and these men are in my age range.. I work long hours, then babysit my grandkids until my baby is on her feet..it seems men want their woman home when they get home..,dating is tough! I have to agree dating is tough,but it doesn't have to be if both are on same page in the very beginning and ajust with each other, it does take 2.If thats not in the picture and a person can't budge, eh maybe, it's time to revaluate.
3/28/2015 6:30:16 PM	Are you in requirement mode,that prevents your dating,or relationship?
reenie4 Milwaukee, WI 60, joined Dec. 2007	On a positive note, having joined several dating sites truly confirms I am not going to settle! A real assessment!
3/30/2015 4:19:42 AM	Are you in requirement mode,that prevents your dating,or relationship?
aladytoo Monroe, WI 61, joined Apr. 2006	I have been on other sites as well paid ones and free.Can't really see any difference.Have to say I have a few great male friends.Even tho we don't date,because of not being on same page.I'm blessed we can see each other,for coffee ,lunch, and outing.And not expect anything .
4/8/2015 5:21:51 AM	Are you in requirement mode,that prevents your dating,or relationship?
ilovepoodles55 Schererville, IN 56, joined Feb. 2015	I will not settle this time around. I was in a church group after my husband died and I learned what emotionally healthy is. I can see the red flags waving in the air and I have healthy boundaries. So far after three years I have not found anyone to even date. I keep a positive attitude and I play it forward in many ways.
4/8/2015 6:58:22 AM	Are you in requirement mode,that prevents your dating,or relationship?
nothingneeded Johnston, IA 49, joined Sep. 2014	I'm in a do for me and my youngest mode. I didn't come on this site looking....I'm here for the forums. Sex can come easy...relationships can come easy....but a lot of men these days don't have morals, same as women. I'm not going for some guy just because he's cute, or because he got money. If he's isn't going any where in life, and still feels the need to be with most women he lays eyes on...by the time he reach 50...then he's got issues...and it didn't start two years prior. When your built on a solid foundation, it stays with you for life. I don't waist my time in trying to figure out what guy has a good solid foundation.
4/8/2015 4:43:05 PM	Are you in requirement mode,that prevents your dating,or relationship?
packersbabe920 Green Bay, WI 52, joined Jul. 2013	Quote from rose1206: Story of my life haha, they are too far from me. I change my mind about the long distance, seem to be working out fineanything possible
4/14/2015 3:21:04 PM	Are you in requirement mode,that prevents your dating,or relationship?
aladytoo Monroe, WI 61, joined Apr. 2006	Quote from packersbabe920: I change my mind about the long distance, seem to be working out fineanything possible Nice to hear packer, that's why I never say never with distance.But they know my ethics and morals always come first,no exceptions.
4/15/2015 5:48:25 PM	Are you in requirement mode,that prevents your dating,or relationship?
lookin4him2012 Boone, NC 49, joined Jan. 2012	I won't date men who live more than 45 minutes from me. I have tried that and it didn't work. He lied all the time and was cheating on me in the end after accusing ME of cheating on him when I wasn't. I have 3 children and no time to travel anyway.
7/13/2015 7:41:04 AM	Are you in requirement mode,that prevents your dating,or relationship?
janet5360 Pittsburgh, PA 64, joined Dec. 2013	I only meet younger men. I would prefer to date in a five year window. Last date I went on he looked like he was getting the band back together. He had two daughters younger than ten. I will never color outside the lines again.
7/13/2015 12:20:32 PM	Are you in requirement mode,that prevents your dating,or relationship?
aladytoo Monroe, WI 61, joined Apr. 2006	Have to say this past year I have made some great new friends,may not be the type I would date,but I value the friendship.Even tho I tell them they are a friend just to visit with,seem the question always comes out as why can't we be more? I have always replied I done raising kids,and he is responsible for himself,cleans ,cooks,has a nice apartment,and bills paid on time.Can you match that?With yourself.I can. I don't need or want someone with money,but would like to meet someone responsible,at this age we all should be.I have all the time needed to date,or even have a serious relationship.When your on same page call me. But right now i'm glad we are friends to visit with.
7/14/2015 2:25:49 AM	Are you in requirement mode,that prevents your dating,or relationship?
featherhay Kansas City, KS 31, joined Mar. 2015	I feel like I'm not in a requirement mode I feel that I look and I'm real and all I get is friends, people That think I'm just one of the guys or I'm just a little sister. how come i feels it when I'm real they don't like me but all they ask for is people that are real and honest but they go after those fake two faced Girls it's not fair.
8/1/2015 5:57:37 AM	Are you in requirement mode,that prevents your dating,or relationship?
aladytoo Monroe, WI 61, joined Apr. 2006	Quote from featherhay: I feel like I'm not in a requirement mode I feel that I look and I'm real and all I get is friends, people That think I'm just one of the guys or I'm just a little sister. how come i feels it when I'm real they don't like me but all they ask for is people that are real and honest but they go after those fake two faced Girls it's not fair. Your a nice looking woman,stay as you are,sometimes men may not chose you because because the know they don't deserve you. A worthy man will take notice,and most likly have same quest as finding a worthy woman. Good luck!!
8/1/2015 11:38:14 PM	Are you in requirement mode,that prevents your dating,or relationship?
my2sunshine Pulaski, NY 51, joined Apr. 2013	Quote from cupocheer: Babe I acknowledge that I may be in a requirement mode as far as dating goes. And That requirement is engrained in my personality. My personality is a trait I was born with. I cannot change my personality for the sake of being a prospect for a man. On the dating scene. All any of you see of my personality is what you read on these Internet white pages. That is not a true characterization of the total me nor of my complete personality. Some choose to travel on one plane And make judgement calls about another only from what they perceive from what they read. My personality, developed through many years as a strong, aggressive female causes many to view me in a way which is completely unfair and unjustified. Until one knows one on a personal basis and in real life can one develop a fair understanding of the person they are associating with. Women, on this site, may feel as if I am many things which I am not in real life. That is their problem, not an issue I have to address about myself. Being called names of less than savory characterization labels the one saying the rude, crude, and slanderous words -- not myself. women, I feel, feel threatened by my personality because they would like to be more like me, are jealous of me for some unknown reason, or are so insecure in themselves that they feel a need to attack me in order to maintain their slot on the conveyor belt Internet dating. Men, on the other hand, give me the distinct impression that they are intimidated by a strong female type and therefore choose to cower in the darkness, often throwing barbs and poison darts at me, when it is their own weakness which they actually fear. It would take one hell (sorry ladies) of a man to meet me toe-to-toe on a neutral playing field. I would not want him to change anything about himself but I require the same consideration in return. What I do have a requirement about is that any relationship which may ensue is one of unconditional consideration. I will never bend in my resolve to be be whom I am by virtue of being myself. Any man who would even consider dating me best be forewarned that I can give as well as I receive, my skin fits my body frame just fine and isn't thin when it comes to holding my own. Additionally, any man who chose to date me be very surprised, I believe, to know that he would be treated as much like a king if a relationship developed -- as long as he treated me with respect, truth and honesty. And I can cook! Having said all that ... At my age I have no hopes and dreams of ever having to worry about finding a man to date. They (men) can't get past my outspoken, truthfulness. I am pretty sure this is the most I have ever read for you CC! Please don't be offended by the I thought you just used all these little emotions to spread cheer and never really had an opinion! Anyway...not all men fear or throw darts at strong women...heck I have had a good run in my life with loving, trustworthy men. What I have found stops me from dating is the numerous prescription pills and alcohol consumption by single men in their 50's. I have a sibling that is an addict and quite frankly I am not interested in men that have the need to get high or feel nothing. As soon as I hear any of the following words...Xanax, oxy, back issues/pain, pot, a 12 pack, bar, pain meds...I make myself unavailable...you get the idea. I almost wish I could drug test a man before even going out the first time! Can you imagine that....here piss in this cup and if you pass we can take my car!
8/2/2015 6:08:50 AM	Are you in requirement mode,that prevents your dating,or relationship?
aladytoo Monroe, WI 61, joined Apr. 2006	I'll have to agree we fine many woman and men with addictions that could affect having a relationship.I'm not a drinker so odds are I'd have no interest in someone who drinks often.I can be a friend,but nothing more.Same would go for drugs,and perscription abuse.I'm very active,with home,yard,and work,as well helpful to others,but love leisure as well.Nothing wrong with down time after a most your work is done.Dust off my couch if you need more breaks first,and fluff the pillows back..thank you!

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