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8/25/2015 11:06:57 PM Need to Vent! Why do women want a man that treats them like crap?  
metrikc
Madison, AL
33, joined Feb. 2013


First u should know I've been single for over 2 years. I have 2 beautiful daughters and that's my life. Well I met this girl and she gave her number to a friend to give it to me. Not the typically the type of girl I'm into plus I wasnt sure I was ready to open up yet. Well I gave her a chance and turns out we hit it off great! I did tell her I wanted to take things slow. She has 2 beautiful girls also around my kids age. We talked and would hang out for maybe a month. She was going through some tough times also so I helped out any way I could. I fell pretty hard for this girl to be honest. Then all the sudden things start changing. At first she was always wanting me to come over. Always wanting to get lunch together(our works werent far apart). Always saying she missed me, how hot she thought I was, etc. Then bam outta no where she changed. This is after I had already started really liking her. One day she likes me the next she dont. This goes on for a week. So I just give her some space to let her think and have some alone time. I'm not trying to brag or anything but I am a good guy. May not be the best looking guy but I dont think I'm ugly. I have never cheated on a woman. I try my best to be honest and treat any woman with respect. I feel I have good values and am very loyal! So now I find out she has had a loser dope head that just got kicked out of his exes house crashing at her place for the last 3 nights. I just dont get why women want a man to treat them like shit. This guy has beaten the hell outta 4 diff girls he has dated. Idk I guess I'll never understand. I'm not some square who doesnt know how to have a good time either. If anyone can please give me real advice other than leave that ho alone or man she played u. I mean real advice(preferably from a woman) I would appreciate it very much. I dont know why I even bothered. Im bout ready to give up. Especially if this happens again.

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8/25/2015 11:28:56 PM Need to Vent! Why do women want a man that treats them like crap?  
im2thexy
Over 10,000 Posts!!! (19,847)
Belleville, ON
49, joined Dec. 2014


Women don't like men who treat them like crap...maybe this woman does...I dunno...I cant speak for her...have you tried asking her about it?...

8/25/2015 11:42:25 PM Need to Vent! Why do women want a man that treats them like crap?  
metrikc
Madison, AL
33, joined Feb. 2013


Its too late for that but obviously she does if she is with him. See in the beginning we just text for a few weeks and it was nice. Then her ex stole her whole check and her phone got cut off. So I decided to surprise her and pay her phone bill. Plus I missed talking too her. Things were going so well. She told me she had never had any do anything like that for her before. There were other things I did for her also. She never asked me to do any of it I'm just that kinda person. SobI guess she couldn't get used to a real man. That's the only thing I can think of.

8/25/2015 11:46:10 PM Need to Vent! Why do women want a man that treats them like crap?  

lareveur
Over 2,000 Posts (2,358)
La Follette, TN
33, joined May. 2013


(this post has been flagged as inappropriate, sorry.)

8/26/2015 12:42:12 AM Need to Vent! Why do women want a man that treats them like crap?  
amusicluvr
Over 10,000 Posts!!! (23,272)
Salem, OR
64, joined Nov. 2013


Most women do NOT want a man that treats them like crap. The few who do were treated like crap by a father, brothers, etc, and feel that they deserve to be treated like crap. Or they have a Messiah Complex...thinking that the guy is good underneath, and that she is what he needs to save him by showing him his good side, They are a minority. Why do you keep picking women like that if you don't want to treat them like crap? Maybe this is all a test to see if she can get you to wake up to your bad-boy side, so you will start punching her as she wants you to. Who cares? Either like it, and stay, or say f**k it, and leave. That is what Big Boys do.

8/26/2015 12:44:24 AM Need to Vent! Why do women want a man that treats them like crap?  

pickygirl72
Over 10,000 Posts!!! (18,407)
Death Valley, CA
46, joined Sep. 2011


She is damaged...move on.

8/26/2015 12:45:16 AM Need to Vent! Why do women want a man that treats them like crap?  
amusicluvr
Over 10,000 Posts!!! (23,272)
Salem, OR
64, joined Nov. 2013


Quote from metrikc:
Its too late for that but obviously she does if she is with him. See in the beginning we just text for a few weeks and it was nice. Then her ex stole her whole check and her phone got cut off. So I decided to surprise her and pay her phone bill. Plus I missed talking too her. Things were going so well. She told me she had never had any do anything like that for her before. There were other things I did for her also. She never asked me to do any of it I'm just that kinda person. SobI guess she couldn't get used to a real man. That's the only thing I can think of.


Maybe they are a Bonnie & Clyde type team...but, instead of robbing banks, and stores, they con suckers like you. It won't matter if you just move on.

8/26/2015 1:05:04 AM Need to Vent! Why do women want a man that treats them like crap?  
metrikc
Madison, AL
33, joined Feb. 2013


Your right I didn't mean to say that all women are that way although most of the women I know do put up with so much crap from their men. U guys are missing the point though. I never said that this guy hit her. He has been known for it. I just don't understand why SOME women go for loser guys. No job, no place of their own, and idk for sure but apparently this guy does drugs. But its the same story over and over and I get so sick of it. Guess I'll never understand. Oh well I have 2 beautiful daughters that love me for who I am and that's all I need. One day maybe I'll find the one for me. I'm happy being me but it would be nice to have someone to share it with.

8/26/2015 1:12:15 AM Need to Vent! Why do women want a man that treats them like crap?  
metrikc
Madison, AL
33, joined Feb. 2013


No that's not it. I'm a pretty smart guy and I'd know if someone was trying to con me. Plus I am really good friends with her sisters husband and I guess her sister and they'd tell me for sure.

8/26/2015 2:16:48 AM Need to Vent! Why do women want a man that treats them like crap?  

lareveur
Over 2,000 Posts (2,358)
La Follette, TN
33, joined May. 2013


Quote from metrikc:
Your right I didn't mean to say that all women are that way although most of the women I know do put up with so much crap from their men. U guys are missing the point though. I never said that this guy hit her. He has been known for it. I just don't understand why SOME women go for loser guys. No job, no place of their own, and idk for sure but apparently this guy does drugs. But its the same story over and over and I get so sick of it. Guess I'll never understand. Oh well I have 2 beautiful daughters that love me for who I am and that's all I need. One day maybe I'll find the one for me. I'm happy being me but it would be nice to have someone to share it with.


^ Alright, maybe I think too much in black and white, fair enough. But that's far better than saturating myself in gray and remaining indecisive. In my mind, there are two types of men AND women: Lions and sheep. You're either going to get what you want in life, or not.
Why do SOME women choose "loser / abusive jerks?" It could be for a myriad of reasons...

(1. They're lions in hibernation and haven't yet met a man that inspired them to awaken their self worth. This can be caused by circumstances in the past that was beyond their control (childhood abuse, past abusive relationships, etc..) They mistakenly "settle" for what they would assume is an upgrade... only to realize later that they simply traded one hell for another

(2. They're sheep with low self worth and either consciously (or sub-consciously) believe that they do not deserve a great catch. "You deserve someone that can make you more happy - happier than I can make myself," etc...etc...

(3. They're lionesses, but they over-praise themselves and their own "Darwinist" dogmas. "Life has no mercy for imperfection /weakness, etc..." They marry their best candidate who ends up dumping them for someone more "superior," younger, richer, sharper, etc.. They don't realize that their facade caused them to fall prey to their own "elitist vanity" and by marrying / partnering with someone that possesses the same mindset - there can only be one, self absorbed winner. Power trips, head games, etc... which makes them losers.

So, you can't really aim too high on that spectrum, either. Just aim for someone that does not treat you like shit - but doesn't treat you like a Prince / Princess either. Find balance, passion and just celebrate each other without keeping score - love will do the rest.

8/26/2015 3:58:19 AM Need to Vent! Why do women want a man that treats them like crap?  
ltlwing
Over 10,000 Posts!!! (11,584)
Winchester, OH
53, joined Oct. 2013


Quit over analyzing the situation....bad is bad period.

The girl has problems that are not your own.

Some women think they can change these bad boy types?
She will realize soon enough that it is wasted effort.

You just need to pick better women...more independent types in taking care of their own problems without having need of intervention in taking care of ex boyfriend issues.

Why do you nice guys try to save women like this???

Big girls, put on their big girl panties in taking care of their own problems before moving on to the next guy.

Clearly this wasn't done before she met you.

This should of been your first red flag!

8/26/2015 4:10:03 AM Need to Vent! Why do women want a man that treats them like crap?  
ltlwing
Over 10,000 Posts!!! (11,584)
Winchester, OH
53, joined Oct. 2013


Quote from metrikc:
Its too late for that but obviously she does if she is with him. See in the beginning we just text for a few weeks and it was nice. Then her ex stole her whole check and her phone got cut off. So I decided to surprise her and pay her phone bill. Plus I missed talking too her. Things were going so well. She told me she had never had any do anything like that for her before. There were other things I did for her also. She never asked me to do any of it I'm just that kinda person. SobI guess she couldn't get used to a real man. That's the only thing I can think of.



Just so you know....this statement in itself speaks volumes to me.

Thus why my response.

8/26/2015 5:21:32 AM Need to Vent! Why do women want a man that treats them like crap?  

browneyz
Over 10,000 Posts!!! (26,166)
San Diego, CA
98, joined Jan. 2008


She was just not that into you. She moved on. That happens to everyone.

She may have more in common with the new guy. Attraction is strange.

She may not want or be ready for a serious relationship. it sucks!

8/26/2015 9:12:41 AM Need to Vent! Why do women want a man that treats them like crap?  

lovethelake17
Over 10,000 Posts!!! (34,989)
Henderson, NV
58, joined May. 2009


Like Ltlwing said, some women believe that the man who treated other women badly won't treat her that way because her pure love will save and reform him. He'll love her enough to want to change. She feels she's the exception. It's a lot like the White Knight Syndrome that some men have.

Some women have only the examples they've experienced all through their life that that is how men treat women and it's just a normal relationship.

Some women believe it's all they deserve.

As much as it can hurt to meet up with someone like that, chalk it up to experience and knowing what not to look for in the future.

8/26/2015 10:08:05 AM Need to Vent! Why do women want a man that treats them like crap?  
cuileann
Over 7,500 Posts!! (8,108)
San Antonio, TX
49, joined Aug. 2015


SOME women may like men who treat them like crap, but many women don't. The ones who DO like those kind of men...I don't know why.

8/26/2015 10:17:35 AM Need to Vent! Why do women want a man that treats them like crap?  
mortara
Over 4,000 Posts! (7,299)
Pittsburgh, PA
63, joined Feb. 2014


I know for sure some women want a man for sex and a man for support. Sometimes it's just one guy and sometimes it is two.

8/26/2015 2:29:54 PM Need to Vent! Why do women want a man that treats them like crap?  
Idleeros
Norcross, GA
28, joined Mar. 2015


Quote from im2thexy:
Women don't like men who treat them like crap...maybe this woman does...I dunno...I cant speak for her...have you tried asking her about it?...


8/26/2015 3:13:00 PM Need to Vent! Why do women want a man that treats them like crap?  

easttowest72
Over 4,000 Posts! (4,922)
Bremen, GA
45, joined Sep. 2014


The guys are very sweet and kind in the begining. The woman hope that it will go back to being that way. After she is hit the guy is very appologetic and smothers her with affection

8/26/2015 3:59:17 PM Need to Vent! Why do women want a man that treats them like crap?  
cthomas1243
Zachary, LA
28, joined Jun. 2015


No, I dont like men who treat me like crap, tbh I haven't dzted a man in 4 years and I am 27 with 2 kids. I am just solo..

8/26/2015 5:51:39 PM Need to Vent! Why do women want a man that treats them like crap?  
nyythawk
Over 1,000 Posts (1,216)
Denver, CO
54, joined Nov. 2010


He either has a lot of money, a lot of d*ck... or both. DUH.


Or he's a psycho and she's afraid to leave him.

8/26/2015 6:30:53 PM Need to Vent! Why do women want a man that treats them like crap?  

packersbabe920
Over 10,000 Posts!!! (72,382)
Green Bay, WI
51, joined Jul. 2013


Well op u should have been glad that she told u and it only went on for a week, so no need to vent

8/26/2015 6:39:11 PM Need to Vent! Why do women want a man that treats them like crap?  

bumblebee7
Over 10,000 Posts!!! (69,949)
Fort Payne, AL
61, joined Apr. 2011


Here we go... with yet another " too nice a guy" thread.

Yep...why do women shine on eventually, a guy who acts like a doormat yes mam, who lost his masculinity and go after good men who know when to be bad, who act manly???????

Of course the too nice a guy calls them jerks that treat women like crap.

That about cover it op?

8/26/2015 6:40:51 PM Need to Vent! Why do women want a man that treats them like crap?  

lareveur
Over 2,000 Posts (2,358)
La Follette, TN
33, joined May. 2013


Whatever. I think I made a pretty firm case - I always get avoided when this happens.
Bumble, my love

8/26/2015 6:46:54 PM Need to Vent! Why do women want a man that treats them like crap?  

bumblebee7
Over 10,000 Posts!!! (69,949)
Fort Payne, AL
61, joined Apr. 2011


I had a client that had a pretty firm case too....but not in a good way.

The dumb a** let her bite his ass, and it left teeth marks deep enough to match up to the pattern of her teeth and verified by an expert.

well...he'll get raked over the coals in this divorce case.


....

8/26/2015 7:58:26 PM Need to Vent! Why do women want a man that treats them like crap?  

sweetmama117
Over 1,000 Posts (1,675)
Bronx, NY
57, joined Aug. 2013


Op I was growing up with this girl that married a wonderful man.

She needed nothing cause he gave her everything she ask for, he

truly loved her. Then one day he left only because she told him

to leave. When my friend and I ask her what happen,She said that

he was too nice and she likes a man to beat her and put her in

her place. After my friend and I ask our self could you believe

that. But then again she grew up watching her dad beat the shit

out of her mom so she thought that's how a man suppose to be.

She remarried to a drunk that beat her and she was madly in love.

I was raise with both my parent whom respected each other till

death did them part and that's what I look for in a relationship.

Good luck

8/26/2015 8:50:35 PM Need to Vent! Why do women want a man that treats them like crap?  

isityouuuu
Over 2,000 Posts (2,181)
Brooklyn, NY
83, joined Mar. 2014


shut and dance with me

8/26/2015 9:17:49 PM Need to Vent! Why do women want a man that treats them like crap?  

driver406
Over 10,000 Posts!!! (51,526)
Saint Paul, MN
64, joined Oct. 2009


He's more MACHO.

Women like BAD BOYS.

She has absolutely no self esteem.

Figures it's the best she can do I guess.

She's turned down all the nice guys and this is all that's left.

8/26/2015 9:34:09 PM Need to Vent! Why do women want a man that treats them like crap?  

digital_knight
Over 2,000 Posts (2,985)
Grand Rapids, MI
44, joined Nov. 2012


You keep mentioning your daughters and it should be easy for you to make better choices on women you bring around them . That girl dont have no respect for her children or a family . You should drop her from your mind like its hot .

8/27/2015 12:08:34 AM Need to Vent! Why do women want a man that treats them like crap?  

bluecougareyes
Over 10,000 Posts!!! (27,737)
Chelan, WA
72, joined Nov. 2008


Any kind of "DRAMA" is good...
It's emotional stimulating...
It get attention and self pity...

Able to post a DH Thread first thing in the morning, at 4:00 am.
She can talk about it and chat all day long on just that one topic.


That's her life, "DRAMA" !

8/27/2015 12:10:46 AM Need to Vent! Why do women want a man that treats them like crap?  

lareveur
Over 2,000 Posts (2,358)
La Follette, TN
33, joined May. 2013


Quote from driver406:
He's more MACHO.

Women like BAD BOYS.

She has absolutely no self esteem.

Figures it's the best she can do I guess.

She's turned down all the nice guys and this is all that's left.


I was into bad boys in my pre-teens. I find them disgusting. Glad to find confirmation in something I have already known since I was in first grade. This thread is pointless.

8/27/2015 7:29:24 AM Need to Vent! Why do women want a man that treats them like crap?  
metrikc
Madison, AL
33, joined Feb. 2013


Appreciate all the responses. Some of you get it and some don't I can see that. I have to admit in my youth I have been known to be a jerk(although still I never hit or cheated). It was always pretty easy to date women then most I would say were out of my league. Just seams like their are no quality women left anymore. Either they are taken or have some other kind of issue. I am very happy being single but my kids really want me to get back out there. She's out there for me I know. Anyway thanks to everyone for all the comments and advice. Good and bad.

8/27/2015 8:03:15 AM Need to Vent! Why do women want a man that treats them like crap?  

dasnixter
Over 10,000 Posts!!! (21,530)
Jessieville, AR
59, joined Jul. 2010


Why would you care Opie


what some women expect from a guy?


You've only a shot


at a minute slice.

How 'bout increasing those odds and moving on to the next candidate once it becomes apparent that you aren't the type for that one?

If a change is needed it's far easier to change yourself than to expect others to change for you.

W/all this whining you very well could need a change


of drawers youse big baby.

8/27/2015 3:51:38 PM Need to Vent! Why do women want a man that treats them like crap?  
pagal17
Over 4,000 Posts! (4,089)
Lancaster, PA
51, joined May. 2012


She played you. Typical addiction behaviors. Learn and move on. You deserve better.

8/27/2015 4:35:11 PM Need to Vent! Why do women want a man that treats them like crap?  

cdd3
Mableton, GA
58, joined Jan. 2013


I feel the same way women will bend over backwards to be abused. Nice guys are their last resort. They like abusive guys because deep down they all want to be dogged out. Look at celebrities Sandra Bulloch Mariah Carey etc. they ain't happy unless somebody's telling then they ain't shit!

8/28/2015 5:04:43 AM Need to Vent! Why do women want a man that treats them like crap?  
cuileann
Over 7,500 Posts!! (8,108)
San Antonio, TX
49, joined Aug. 2015


SOME women like abusive men. Why? I'm not sure. Maybe it's the way they're used to being treated. Maybe they have very low self-esteem. But there are many women who aren't going to put up with a man who is abusive in any sort of way. And I want a nice guy, but not a phony nice one.



[Edited 8/28/2015 5:05:41 AM ]

8/28/2015 7:58:39 AM Need to Vent! Why do women want a man that treats them like crap?  
daneene
Over 1,000 Posts (1,997)
Allen Park, MI
52, joined Jan. 2014


Many women are so low in self esteem that they subconsciously seek out abusers. She's probably not going to change, move on and find yourself someone who deserves you.

8/28/2015 10:24:38 PM Need to Vent! Why do women want a man that treats them like crap?  
ladyseekinggent
Over 2,000 Posts (2,705)
New Milford, NJFreiland
Austria
37, joined Aug. 2010


The environment in which you live a[e]ffects what you become.
She is not used to being treated well, because of the environment in which she lives.

[1]Would this guy that crashed with her beat you up if he knew you were seeing her?
[2]Would your relationship, if you were to get into one with her have to be a secret, if so stay away from her and find somebody new. Don't waste brain cells on it anymore.

9/1/2015 4:10:37 PM Need to Vent! Why do women want a man that treats them like crap?  

pickygirl72
Over 10,000 Posts!!! (18,407)
Death Valley, CA
46, joined Sep. 2011


Gals that like bad boys have low self esteem. They think its a exciting life and think that is how men should treat them. OP go find yourself a nice gal who has her shit together, is independent of family or an ex and don't worry about the rest.

9/1/2015 5:02:41 PM Need to Vent! Why do women want a man that treats them like crap?  

enigmaathand
Over 10,000 Posts!!! (10,791)
Leavittsburg, OH
36, joined Mar. 2013


Quote from bumblebee7:
Here we go... with yet another " too nice a guy" thread.

Yep...why do women shine on eventually, a guy who acts like a doormat yes mam, who lost his masculinity and go after good men who know when to be bad, who act manly???????

Of course the too nice a guy calls them jerks that treat women like crap.

That about cover it op?


Despite how coarse Bumblebee is, he is spot on correct. Studies have proven, that women love to be with a badass. A badass may treat them like shit, but they display confidence.

No matter what feminist posts or here, with all their psycho-babble BS, a core truth remains about people. We like confidence. We don't like weakness.

Constantly being nice and being a "doormat", as Bumblebee states, is really only going to get you a feminist. They love doormat, nice guys, so they can remain in control and continually flaunt their eliteness over the "Y" chromosome.

Maybe you should look up Twinning, on here. She is a women's liberal.

Start showing these women, that you have respect for yourself, by not tolerating everything they do. Show some pushback, bro. Set some boundaries.

I may be single, and on here like the rest, but one thing I get is respect from those around me. I respect myself, and that shows to other people in my actions.

You need to take a very good self-inventory and possibly a personality test, to find your areas of opportunity. I know what your problem is, because I used to be just like you.

Stop trying to blame the females for bad choices in men. One, we all know that women male the worst choices in mem, most of the time. Two, regardless of how many total women you have dated or slept with, there is one constant in all those relationships: it is YOU. All the women are different in some way, making all of them variables. You are the constant. Therefore start working on how to make your testicles properly descend to their rightful place, in your nutsack.

9/1/2015 11:02:44 PM Need to Vent! Why do women want a man that treats them like crap?  

driver406
Over 10,000 Posts!!! (51,526)
Saint Paul, MN
64, joined Oct. 2009


That's how BLACK BAD BOYZ treat their women. It's all very MACHO and women MACHO even if it mean busted noses, black eyes, extended hospital stays etc etc.

Seems to me that any babe with the brains of a catepillar would never put up with that but we know this is NOT true.

9/2/2015 6:17:55 AM Need to Vent! Why do women want a man that treats them like crap?  

viper1e
Over 10,000 Posts!!! (15,193)
Jeannette, PA
58, joined Dec. 2013


Quote from metrikc:
Why do women want a man that treats them like crap?


So they can say they were right.

9/2/2015 6:26:42 AM Need to Vent! Why do women want a man that treats them like crap?  
cuileann
Over 7,500 Posts!! (8,108)
San Antonio, TX
49, joined Aug. 2015


Quote from cdd3:
I feel the same way women will bend over backwards to be abused. Nice guys are their last resort. They like abusive guys because deep down they all want to be dogged out. Look at celebrities Sandra Bulloch Mariah Carey etc. they ain't happy unless somebody's telling then they ain't shit!

All women huh? No! Many women will not tolerate any man who abuses her or treats her poorly in any sort of way.



[Edited 9/2/2015 6:27:02 AM ]

9/2/2015 6:53:19 AM Need to Vent! Why do women want a man that treats them like crap?  

twining
Over 10,000 Posts!!! (10,998)
Anderson, SC
24, joined Jun. 2014


The guy who's staying over at her house. Is he possibly the father of her two kids? If he is, that would give him a place holder. When it comes to children, which I'm sure you know, people make all sorts of sacrifices for them. Look at the bright side, at least she didn't string you along as Boyfriend Number 2.

9/2/2015 7:36:30 AM Need to Vent! Why do women want a man that treats them like crap?  

bumblebee7
Over 10,000 Posts!!! (69,949)
Fort Payne, AL
61, joined Apr. 2011


Op....part of the problem is pertaining to this thread and some of the comments.

Is that as men we can't suddenly turn into women and see things from their side.

In the same token, they can't suddenly turn into men and see things from our side.

I think they'd be shocked if they did...but so would a lot of men if they walked in their shoes.

9/2/2015 2:36:20 PM Need to Vent! Why do women want a man that treats them like crap?  

bumblebee7
Over 10,000 Posts!!! (69,949)
Fort Payne, AL
61, joined Apr. 2011


@enigmaathand^^^^^^^^^you know why I'm course sometimes????

Because I have what's known as child like honesty.

When I read something.

I don't think about what I write....whatever it is I write down...just comes to me instantly faster than a computer.

Even if its several sentences long...poof, its there, all I have to do is write it down.


and I don't think about.

1) what will they think of me?

2) will this upset my chances of dates?

3) is it politically correct?

4) will I be deemed a racist, or woman hater?

5) or will I lose any popularity.

5) etc, etc.

I just write it down off the top of my head.....Personally I prefer that over the games people play.

I don't expect people to always agree with me.

But, if they view me as real and honest at least...that's all I can ask for.

but, with what you wrote up there.

I can't say I agree with it....not the way you wrote it.



[Edited 9/2/2015 2:37:41 PM ]

9/2/2015 7:35:29 PM Need to Vent! Why do women want a man that treats them like crap?  

enigmaathand
Over 10,000 Posts!!! (10,791)
Leavittsburg, OH
36, joined Mar. 2013


I wasn't trying to come off, as offensive, with the remark of "coarse".

It is the first word, I associate with your blunt style of telling the truth.

I respect blunt people. They may not tell you what you want to here, but you'll respect their honesty.

As the saying goes: The truth may set you free, but first, it will piss you off.

9/2/2015 9:52:55 PM Need to Vent! Why do women want a man that treats them like crap?  
thehonestangel
San Antonio, TX
47, joined Feb. 2014


Honestly she just played you and you should leave that hoe alone..Lol couldn't resist. But to me sounds like she just used you, she was probably just trying to make the other guy jealous with you. She had no real intensions of being with you. Truth is shit will always be well shit. You can scoop it up, flush it, cover it up with disinfected spray, even bury it, but it will always be shit. You don't need anyones advice, you will figure it out yourself. Best of luck.

9/2/2015 10:27:51 PM Need to Vent! Why do women want a man that treats them like crap?  

gdaddy47
Over 7,500 Posts!! (8,832)
Columbia, TN
69, joined Sep. 2009


This is a "I'm a good guy" thread

9/4/2015 3:45:20 AM Need to Vent! Why do women want a man that treats them like crap?  

barrydalmi
Over 10,000 Posts!!! (21,460)
Baltimore, MD
53, joined Dec. 2007


Answering title...didn't read the dense diatribe.


Usually it boils down to self-esteem issues, sometimes its learned behavior (abusive parents). It is complex, but sadly yes it is a thing.


Now wait a minute though; this wasn't a "nice guy" thread in disguise was it?

9/9/2015 10:36:03 AM Need to Vent! Why do women want a man that treats them like crap?  

isabelmv02
Chowchilla, CA
25, joined Nov. 2014


its hard to give up someone you loved and cared for n have kids with see I left me ex n I was seeing someone and he was good to me and my kids but then things changed n I went back to my ex and now where back to him cheating but I guess it's like these if we don't try and let go to fast we might regret and wonder what we have worked out or like me I wish I would of never went back

9/9/2015 10:52:23 AM Need to Vent! Why do women want a man that treats them like crap?  

dasnixter
Over 10,000 Posts!!! (21,530)
Jessieville, AR
59, joined Jul. 2010


Holy wall o' text!

Blah, blah, blah.

It isn't what ladies prefer as much as what they care not for

w/that being you Opie.

9/9/2015 10:43:37 PM Need to Vent! Why do women want a man that treats them like crap?  

Tat2dLyricist
Montebello, CA
26, joined Aug. 2015


From my own experience most women want a man who is a man, does it mean treating them like crap? No but sometimes, inversely sometimes they don't he same to the man and they can't deny it; it's always give and take never just take take take

9/9/2015 11:09:25 PM Need to Vent! Why do women want a man that treats them like crap?  
marriedncheatin
Over 10,000 Posts!!! (14,678)
Twin Falls, ID
50, joined Jul. 2012


Quote from pickygirl72:
She is damaged...move on.

Low self-esteem

9/9/2015 11:30:57 PM Need to Vent! Why do women want a man that treats them like crap?  
Chairman__Darth
Over 4,000 Posts! (4,941)
North York, ON
46, joined Jul. 2015


Quote from metrikc:
First u should know I've been single for over 2 years. I have 2 beautiful daughters and that's my life. Well I met this girl and she gave her number to a friend to give it to me. Not the typically the type of girl I'm into plus I wasnt sure I was ready to open up yet. Well I gave her a chance and turns out we hit it off great! I did tell her I wanted to take things slow. She has 2 beautiful girls also around my kids age. We talked and would hang out for maybe a month. She was going through some tough times also so I helped out any way I could. I fell pretty hard for this girl to be honest. Then all the sudden things start changing. At first she was always wanting me to come over. Always wanting to get lunch together(our works werent far apart). Always saying she missed me, how hot she thought I was, etc. Then bam outta no where she changed. This is after I had already started really liking her. One day she likes me the next she dont. This goes on for a week. So I just give her some space to let her think and have some alone time. I'm not trying to brag or anything but I am a good guy. May not be the best looking guy but I dont think I'm ugly. I have never cheated on a woman. I try my best to be honest and treat any woman with respect. I feel I have good values and am very loyal! So now I find out she has had a loser dope head that just got kicked out of his exes house crashing at her place for the last 3 nights. I just dont get why women want a man to treat them like shit. This guy has beaten the hell outta 4 diff girls he has dated. Idk I guess I'll never understand. I'm not some square who doesnt know how to have a good time either. If anyone can please give me real advice other than leave that ho alone or man she played u. I mean real advice(preferably from a woman) I would appreciate it very much. I dont know why I even bothered. Im bout ready to give up. Especially if this happens again.


I dont know what you want to hear? do you want to hear fairy tales or a magical solution how to get her back?

Or do you want to hear the truth?

The truth is you really didn't know this woman and she gave you the clues and you chose to ignore them.

A woman that has been in relationships with abusive men has PROBLEMS, you were the nice guy , she enjoyed that until you got emotionally attached and started being TOO NICE and that triggered her " run forest runnnnnnn" mechanism and she went back to what she is used to.

The woman need help, your job isnt to help her, save her, guide her or to nurture her, she is emotionally damaged and sometimes you have to cut bait to save your sanity.

This is one of those time man, RUNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN.
Wish her the best and RUNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN
Boy boys abusing her

9/9/2015 11:37:42 PM Need to Vent! Why do women want a man that treats them like crap?  
lovedariank
New York, NY
24, joined Aug. 2015


Quote from metrikc:
First u should know I've been single for over 2 years. I have 2 beautiful daughters and that's my life. Well I met this girl and she gave her number to a friend to give it to me. Not the typically the type of girl I'm into plus I wasnt sure I was ready to open up yet. Well I gave her a chance and turns out we hit it off great! I did tell her I wanted to take things slow. She has 2 beautiful girls also around my kids age. We talked and would hang out for maybe a month. She was going through some tough times also so I helped out any way I could. I fell pretty hard for this girl to be honest. Then all the sudden things start changing. At first she was always wanting me to come over. Always wanting to get lunch together(our works werent far apart). Always saying she missed me, how hot she thought I was, etc. Then bam outta no where she changed. This is after I had already started really liking her. One day she likes me the next she dont. This goes on for a week. So I just give her some space to let her think and have some alone time. I'm not trying to brag or anything but I am a good guy. May not be the best looking guy but I dont think I'm ugly. I have never cheated on a woman. I try my best to be honest and treat any woman with respect. I feel I have good values and am very loyal! So now I find out she has had a loser dope head that just got kicked out of his exes house crashing at her place for the last 3 nights. I just dont get why women want a man to treat them like shit. This guy has beaten the hell outta 4 diff girls he has dated. Idk I guess I'll never understand. I'm not some square who doesnt know how to have a good time either. If anyone can please give me real advice other than leave that ho alone or man she played u. I mean real advice(preferably from a woman) I would appreciate it very much. I dont know why I even bothered. Im bout ready to give up. Especially if this happens again.



Wow, I can't believe shit like this happens to more mature people than me.

Dear OP,
First of all, I'm sorry it is not working out between you and that one woman.

Second, someone needs to tell you the cold truth. She used you. You can't allow this to go any further. I am not the type of gal to judge, but man, that woman never had feelings for you. Otherwise she wouldn't have let a man into her house. And I don't believe for a second she let him in just because she felt like doing a good deed and decided that it was then or never.

Third, your sweet girls don't need that type of woman in their lifes. They a have a good father figure and as such, he deserves someone who can meet his high standards.

I don't know you, but you seem like a good man with a good heart. Don't give up on women. We are not all the same.

Best wishes to you OP.

9/9/2015 11:38:42 PM Need to Vent! Why do women want a man that treats them like crap?  

sancho____
Over 10,000 Posts!!! (35,793)
Jalisco
Mexico
35, joined Jun. 2014


Didn't read

9/11/2015 5:46:33 PM Need to Vent! Why do women want a man that treats them like crap?  

bumblebee7
Over 10,000 Posts!!! (69,949)
Fort Payne, AL
61, joined Apr. 2011


Here's a better, more legit question and it applies to almost every man on the planet.

Or maybe them all.

Why do men put up with women who in the long run, (if they looked at it realistically)....

who treat them like shit ???????

9/11/2015 10:40:02 PM Need to Vent! Why do women want a man that treats them like crap?  

enigmaathand
Over 10,000 Posts!!! (10,791)
Leavittsburg, OH
36, joined Mar. 2013


Quote from isabelmv02:
its hard to give up someone you loved and cared for n have kids with see I left me ex n I was seeing someone and he was good to me and my kids but then things changed n I went back to my ex and now where back to him cheating but I guess it's like these if we don't try and let go to fast we might regret and wonder what we have worked out or like me I wish I would of never went back
This is actually very insightful, for those reading.

I commend your bravery to explain that.

I just want to say, to you, the same thing I said to a total stranger a few years ago. She is now a friend. Her boyfriend, at the time I met her, used to beat her. I actually stood between him and her, that night, when he was threatening to beat her in front of all of us.

I am 6'02" and about 195 lbs. I am not a big guy, by a long shot. This guy is a a bounty hunter, as they are called. Ex-military, volunteer firefighter and huge. He probably could have easily killed me.

I looked at her, that night, and I told her, "You have the power to change your situation, at any time you want to."

We did not have any contact, for over a year. Then, I messaged her on Facebook. She had finally dumped the abuser and was actually working on finding a more stable companion.

Best of luck to your decisions, with your own situation.

9/12/2015 12:54:56 AM Need to Vent! Why do women want a man that treats them like crap?  

my2sunshine
Over 4,000 Posts! (5,636)
Pulaski, NY
50, joined Apr. 2013


Quote from pickygirl72:
She is damaged...move on.


True and solves it!

But if he doesn't what does that say about him?

Yikes!

9/12/2015 6:05:44 AM Need to Vent! Why do women want a man that treats them like crap?  
riflessivo
Over 10,000 Posts!!! (17,455)
AlmafuerteStaffordshire
United Kingdom
42, joined Jan. 2014


First u should know I've been single for over 2 years.


Ok, come back when it's over 10.

I have 2 beautiful daughters and that's my life.

Me too, one I didn't even give birth to.

Well I met this girl and she gave her number to a friend to give it to me.

Ok? But I am wondering as a man in his 30's she just didn't give it you herself.

Not the typically the type of girl I'm into plus I wasnt sure I was ready to open up yet.


Urm you've either over thought it at this point into a relationship or some information is missing.

Well I gave her a chance and turns out we hit it off great!

A chance at what?

I did tell her I wanted to take things slow.


Urm so far it wasn't slow. Like I said information missing or you over thought it.

She has 2 beautiful girls also around my kids age. We talked and would hang out for maybe a month.

Talk can be cheap. But I don't know what you talked about.

She was going through some tough times also so I helped out any way I could.

We all do, life has a way of doing that.

I fell pretty hard for this girl to be honest.


What happened to going slow? Did you tell her how you felt?

Then all the sudden things start changing. At first she was always wanting me to come over. Always wanting to get lunch together(our works werent far apart). Always saying she missed me, how hot she thought I was, etc. Then bam outta no where she changed.


Still a lot of information missing. Like did you tell her how you felt. Because that is important to why she "changed" If you did, she may have got scared. Because it sounds like you both were not ready. If you didn't. Again should could of got scared and thought I'm into him but I don't feel he's into me. Talking helps set direction.

This is after I had already started really liking her. One day she likes me the next she dont.


Dude, I'm going to say this. If you talked to her like you are doing with us. You miss things out that are important. If, both of you talked like this. No wonder confusion hits.

This goes on for a week. So I just give her some space to let her think and have some alone time.[/]
A whole week? So instead of being direct you left her alone to over think it? Rather than just ask if everything is ok?

I'm not trying to brag or anything but I am a good guy.


Good guy or not you need to communicate clearer. Sure, sometimes it's hard. Sometimes it's scary but if your needs are feeling the way yours are/were. You think talking may of helped?

May not be the best looking guy but I dont think I'm ugly.


Not to be insensitive at this point. But part of me believes insecurity is a killer.

I have never cheated on a woman. I try my best to be honest and treat any woman with respect. I feel I have good values and am very loyal!


Me too, but so far you suck at communicating your needs. Sorry.

So now I find out she has had a loser dope head that just got kicked out of his exes house crashing at her place for the last 3 nights.


Find out? You still haven't talked to her!

I just dont get why women want a man to treat them like shit.


Urm you overthink things but don't talk to the person directly. At this point in your mind she's screwing him. Heck, some of our friends are not perfect.

This guy has beaten the hell outta 4 diff girls he has dated.


Comparing yourself

Idk I guess I'll never understand. I'm not some square who doesnt know how to have a good time either


Understand this, you overthink things. Instead of talking.

If anyone can please give me real advice other than leave that ho alone or man she played u. I mean real advice(preferably from a woman) I would appreciate it very much. I dont know why I even bothered. Im bout ready to give up. Especially if this happens again.


Yes see above answers. Please remember people can be negative especially when it comes to others.

Part of me believes the reason you were not ready is cause of your past. Somewhere it lead to you feeling insecure about who you are and you feel vulnerable talking about how you feel. Which leads to you feeling insecure and fear of talking.

Be honest with how you really feel with someone. That way, even if you do lose out. You won't be left wondering.

We all want to protect our feelings. But if you protect them from the people you care for. How will they ever know? How do you move forward with them?