| 3/9/2008 8:06:58 PM |
Why do nice guys always finish last? |
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wooley1953
Raleigh, NC
age: 54
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I guess that I pick the wrong ladies because I have finished last.
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| 3/9/2008 8:50:52 PM |
Why do nice guys always finish last? |
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daddyduck
Splendora, TX
age: 54
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Nice Guys finish last becasue they have a heart, and hearts get broken, piece of shit , ego pretty boys can't be hurt cause they don't care, they love themselves more than anyone else could, so nobody else matters. But nice gals can run into the same problem.
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| 3/9/2008 9:04:18 PM |
Why do nice guys always finish last? |
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forestrose
Calgary, AB
age: 55
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From what I have seen, it isn't gender specific. It is nothing new that there is one kind of girl/woman
you want to take home to your mom, or at our age, your kids, but another kind you want to take out, and to bed.
A nice guy, to me: genuine, kind, respectful (esp. to kids and animals), sense of humor (not at the cost of others),
doesn't take advantage of people, helps others, doesn't swear more than me, is not controlling or bossy or paranoid or jealous, can carry on an intelligent conversation, doesn't have gender stereotypes, is loyal if in a relationship, isn't a know-it-all, affectionate.
I am thankful I have always been attracted to nice guys as bf, husb.
I think for some people there is a challenge in thinking they can change someone to give up their evil ways.
[Edited 3/9/2008 9:48:41 PM]
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| 3/9/2008 9:57:24 PM |
Why do nice guys always finish last? |
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momx3inbv
Buena Vista, VA
age: 30
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It's not that nice guys finish last. All of the nice guys that I have found tend to run from women because they have been hurt so many times. So it's like they aren't into getting back into any relationship. They tend to put up huge walls that we ladies have to break down. Causing them to finish last.
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| 3/9/2008 11:21:23 PM |
Why do nice guys always finish last? |
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wizduels
Lees Summit, MO
age: 33
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missmatch well nice guys have a problem: they are too nice. they are willing to bend over backward to please their woman because their woman is everything to them. that is a noble thing in itself but not neccessary the most conducive thing to a relationship. a man that gives his woman everything she wants and sets no boundries is bound to get walked on by his woman. in the long run she will not respect him for it. all of this behaviour stems from a fear of loss. it is the fear of losing your girl that causes you to cling tighter, and to cling tighter only serves to drive them away.
how did i get over being 'too nice' you asked? by taking stock of myself, coming to the realization and genuine belief that i have plenty to offer any woman that shares attraction with me, and that most importantly, there are plenty of women out there. any woman that a man loses is quite frankly replaceable. this does not mean that she is not special. i am in no way making the statement that all women are the same. but once i realized that a woman can be replaced with another if the relationship failed, it eliminated my fear of loss and enabled me to avoid behaving in a manner that fosters a lack of respect from my partner.
the elimination of the fear of loss enables a man to be fearless to set boundries in a relationship, to exercise restraint on behaviour that would be counter-productive to the relationship, to tell his woman NO when it is justified (instead of saying yes due to fear of loss via displeasing her), to stand his ground if he is a man of good character no matter how disagreeable or angry she may become.
in the end she will only respect him more, and it will make the relationship better. so yes i am still a nice guy. i am not 'too nice'. i am not an asshole either. i am just me, with my strengths, weaknesses, standards and convictions, which i will no longer allow myself to compromise, regardless of how much i may like the woman i am with, because i have no fear of loss anymore.
i treat my woman right. i am kind and generous to her. i treat her like i want to keep her. but NEVER at the expense of my own integrity. not anymore.
[Edited 3/9/2008 11:29:02 PM]
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| 3/10/2008 12:11:06 AM |
Why do nice guys always finish last? |
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tommyguy4u
Brooklyn, NY
age: 42
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Because when your nice & express openly & honestly,theyy feel they have you hooked & then play you for a sucker..
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| 3/10/2008 12:26:08 AM |
Why do nice guys always finish last? |
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venussmiles
Jacksonville Beach, FL
age: 52
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Just gonna think out loud:
Wiz - That logic can be substituted for nice girls also; but the truth of the matter is you should be supportive of each other in a relationship which should entail mutual respect without sacrificing self-respect. The expendable / replaceable idealogy kind of smacks of the Stepford Wives (Husbands) to me. Sure, another person may come into your life; hopefully, they are different; but hopefully, you remembered you got into the previous relationship because you cared about that person before too.
Sometimes nice people finish last because we set ourselves up for it -- it's a safe place to be. Someone mentioned the walls built up from being hurt before leaving the other person to work at chipping them away, finding a crack, etc. Understandable to a point. We've all been hurt before. If you REALLY want that closeness again, you have to become vulnerable; otherwise, you will always feel last or left out.
If someone says, "You're like a sister (brother)to me.", hell, they are just not that into you for an intimate relationship. Geez! One sided feelings happen, a lot or there are timing issues; right for him, not for her.
Other times nice people finish last because they fall victim to the indecisiveness / confusion of the person they're with - another nice person. This I think is the hardest because there's a lot of speculation unless the communication is really open. Yet, this too leaves 2 nice people with that "finished last" feeling.
I guess when girls are younger, in HS or just leaving home, it's really rebellion & asserting independence; flaunting parental restrictions - especially her Dad's, to be attracted to & hang out with the "bad boys / jerks/ etc". Some don't outgrow it. 
I'll keep my theory on the male gender to myself since we're really talking about nice guys.
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| 3/10/2008 12:41:09 AM |
Why do nice guys always finish last? |
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stemtva
Rockford, IL
age: 25
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because real woman can't stand to have a real man thats why we finish last its their fault becuse there are real good guys like us but woman don't see us as boyfriend material only friend material which BITES
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| 3/10/2008 3:20:29 AM |
Why do nice guys always finish last? |
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ge0ge0
Tallahassee, FL
age: 41 online now!
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George, I'm just down the road from you and have seen too many gamers in and around Tally town. It's a college town so if you're over 30 your life's going to suck unless you can really put yourself out there.
Well hello neighbor! Gamers are abound in probably every city but I will concede to your experience in that area. I know a few single guys my age or older who aren't interested in settling down and play the field. In my short time being single I really haven't had a problem finding a date locally if that's what I desired.
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| 3/10/2008 2:29:23 PM |
Why do nice guys always finish last? |
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pleasurepirate
Shreveport, LA
age: 47
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.
Lots of women prefer their guy to finish last!!!!! 
Too many women get stuck with guys who finish first and never finish them.
Comedy's often rooted in tragedy.
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| 3/10/2008 2:30:35 PM |
Why do nice guys always finish last? |
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gonesailingbabe
Des Moines, IA
age: 44
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Dang I was going to say the REALLY nice guys finish last - cuz they're letting the ladies go first!!!!!!!!!!
Wasn't that the topic?
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| 3/10/2008 2:42:57 PM |
Why do nice guys always finish last? |
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pleasurepirate
Shreveport, LA
age: 47
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.
Lots of women prefer their guy to finish last!!!!!
Too many women get stuck with guys who finish first and never finish them.
Comedy's often rooted in tragedy.
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| 3/10/2008 2:47:11 PM |
Why do nice guys always finish last? |
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ldt
Houma, LA
age: 41
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I'm with ya on that one captain.....
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| 3/10/2008 3:36:23 PM |
Why do nice guys always finish last? |
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katiescarlett72
Dallas, TX
age: 35
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These threads are so irritating. Just because you've been hurt doesn't mean that all women only want a "bad boy" or nice guys always finish last. Get over yourself and stop taking romantic comedies and sitcoms like they're documentaries.
The people who end up happy are the ones who have the guts to try again, even when the last one didn't work out or ended up being a jerk.
My honey is the sweetest (NICEST) man I've ever met, and I'm also nuts about him.
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| 3/10/2008 3:42:09 PM |
Why do nice guys always finish last? |
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newinil
Carlock, IL
age: 36
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Awww thanks Katie..
Oh wait...Your talking about the other guy aren't you.
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