| 8/9/2012 7:36:50 PM |
Does the pain ever go away |
|
msg916
Kemp, TX
54, joined Jul. 2012
|
My divorce has been final for nearly two years. Everytime I see or talk to my ex-wife it kills me physically and emotionally.I was blinded sided when she told me she wanted it. I begged to her to let us work on it. But no. Why does it still hurt so?
Meet singles at DateHookup.dating, we're 100% free! Join now!
|
| 8/9/2012 7:51:01 PM |
Does the pain ever go away |
|
jrbogie1949
Ventura, CA
68, joined Mar. 2009
|
i feel for ya man. nothing i could say can help so just give it time. nothing's forever.
|
| 8/9/2012 9:21:04 PM |
Does the pain ever go away |
|
mmichael
Carnegie, PA
32, joined Mar. 2007
|
It never fully goes away but as time goes on it wont hurt as much...
|
| 8/9/2012 9:47:56 PM |
Does the pain ever go away |
|
dlb2370
Royal Oak, MI
46, joined Jul. 2011
|
Your pain probably won't go away soon because YOU still love her. Wish you the best, but you have to let go.
|
| 8/11/2012 6:29:44 AM |
Does the pain ever go away |
|
vipir35
Courtland, VA
56, joined Sep. 2011
|
Good Grief Man 2 years... Next your tell us you aint had any p*ssy in 3 years right ...
|
| 8/11/2012 6:52:25 AM |
Does the pain ever go away |
|
etail01
Kokomo, IN
44, joined Aug. 2012
|
I agree with dlb, you've gotta let her go. i hope ya the best
|
| 8/11/2012 7:56:14 AM |
Does the pain ever go away |
|
dangetsnone
York, PA
59, joined Jul. 2012
|
My divorce has been final for nearly two years. Everytime I see or talk to my ex-wife it kills me physically and emotionally.I was blinded sided when she told me she wanted it. I begged to her to let us work on it. But no. Why does it still hurt so?
It hurts being you are wanting to control the situation. Take a long good look at everything through out the marriage, good and bad.
I was married for 20 years when my ex left without any warning although in hindsight she was. The signs were always there and it finally happens. All youc an do is move ahead and let her go.
This is why there are profeassionals to talk with, to help sort out your emotions and the physical attention you are desiring.
Now get your head out of your a** and start living.
|
| 8/11/2012 2:42:09 PM |
Does the pain ever go away |
|
tamepp2
Diana, TX
51, joined Aug. 2012
|
I know how you feel. My divorce has been a year and he didn't want to work it out either. I'm still in the healing process but know it will get better eventually. I have faith you will too.
|
| 8/12/2012 3:37:44 PM |
Does the pain ever go away |
|
digitaldog
Grove, OK
68, joined Dec. 2010
|
How to " make the pain go away " ..??..!!
Just do what I do...
But whatever you do..
 
 
It works for me....
 Digital Dog
|
| 8/12/2012 10:41:26 PM |
Does the pain ever go away |
|
serenity337
Lawrence, KS
47, joined May. 2012
|
My divorce has been final for nearly two years. Everytime I see or talk to my ex-wife it kills me physically and emotionally.I was blinded sided when she told me she wanted it. I begged to her to let us work on it. But no. Why does it still hurt so?
it will get easier and less painful eventually.
|
| 8/13/2012 12:07:17 AM |
Does the pain ever go away |
|
tiggerpa
Berwyn, IL
34, joined Jul. 2012
|
It took me about a year, is the best thing ever!!!! There is life after divorce. Give it time and find someone to hangout with, have fun and get laid.
|
| 8/16/2012 12:53:03 PM |
Does the pain ever go away |
|
sankie1
Irvine, KY
69, joined Dec. 2011
|
it will get easier and less painful eventually.
Then you can think: I can do whatever I want without getting the OK first. I can laugh again. I can send a sympathy card to you on your birthday, A money card for Christmas with nothing in it, and a THANK YOU card on your anniversary that says "The sky is bluer, The sun in brighter, The grass is greener. Thank You."
|
| 8/16/2012 1:45:03 PM |
Does the pain ever go away |
|
brian82wa
Poulsbo, WA
35, joined Jan. 2011
|
Ive been divorced for 3 yrs 2 months and it doesnt hurt me. I was the one who got the divorce. My ex-wife was pitiful. Lazy, SELFISH, cared only about herself, a very lousy mother and an abusive and controlling woman. She has no contact with my kids anymore and has chosen not to see them for nearly 4 yrs now, doesnt pay child support, doesnt give gifts them, and no phone calls anymore. She is lower than dirt and im glad to be moved on with life with her left in the dust.
|
| 8/17/2012 11:17:56 PM |
Does the pain ever go away |
|
mysticjewel
El Cajon, CA
46, joined May. 2012
|
As the old saying goes... Time heals all, is true! One day you will look back and realize you don't hurt anymore. In the mean time you'll need to be proactive in letting the pain go. It may sound silly, but it's good to write down all of your emotions in a letter to that person. You don't have to send it, I usually burn it when I'm done. It just helps to get your feelings out. It may also help to join a Meetup group in your area so you can get out and have some fun and meet new people!
Good luck & best wishes!
|
| 8/18/2012 12:30:19 AM |
Does the pain ever go away |
|
frank2469
Cicero, IL
40, joined Aug. 2012
|
Well today was my d day. Not sure how I feel. Just happy to have my son
|
| 8/18/2012 4:08:10 AM |
Does the pain ever go away |
|
core13
Rosemead, CA
46, joined Mar. 2012
|
crystalmeth helped for a bit but
when i stopped, it all came rushing back in
now im physically addicted and emotionally destroyed.. f**k my life..
|
| 8/18/2012 3:02:21 PM |
Does the pain ever go away |
|
luckylouie42
Cedar Grove, WV
75, joined Mar. 2008
|
Old saying; best way to get over one; is to get on top of another one. 
|
| 8/20/2012 12:41:52 AM |
Does the pain ever go away |
|
blackbutter3971
Riverside, CA
59, joined Aug. 2012
|
Know this don't allow anyone to judge you on how long it takes for you to move on..it takes as long as it takes..20 year is a long time in any one's life.
|
| 8/20/2012 12:55:03 AM |
Does the pain ever go away |
|
hottnalabama
Opp, AL
59, joined Jun. 2012
|
yessssssssss mine took 3yrs but now im fine and movingggggggggggggg on    
|
| 8/20/2012 10:57:29 AM |
Does the pain ever go away |
|
danmcdonough
Rosemount, MN
43, joined Jun. 2011
|
My divorce has been final for nearly two years. Everytime I see or talk to my ex-wife it kills me physically and emotionally.I was blinded sided when she told me she wanted it. I begged to her to let us work on it. But no. Why does it still hurt so?
It's been 2 1/2 years for me. I could have easily typed those exact same words.
I normally don't say this, but I know what you're feeling. It's the hardest thing I've ever survived.
I have a daughter to swap 50/50. It's so hard to see her gorgeous face and I cannot call her mine. No hugs. I'm not even able to ask how was your day?
Maybe someday we can be friends again.
I really miss my friend...
|
| 8/20/2012 11:07:21 AM |
Does the pain ever go away |
|
guest54321
Berkeley Springs, WV
54, joined Oct. 2011
|
wow snap out of it man...No piece of tail is worth that
|
| 8/20/2012 11:18:43 AM |
Does the pain ever go away |
|
danmcdonough
Rosemount, MN
43, joined Jun. 2011
|
Tail - no, you're right. But she was more than tail. That's the difference. And be careful to judge when you know so little. 
Tail. Tail is available 24/7. I could send a text anytime of day or night and have someone at my place in 10-30 minutes.
I've dated more women since separation and divorce than I'd like to admit.
They're aggressive. They want more. So far, I have not found one I'd want to stick with.
|
| 8/22/2012 10:02:04 PM |
Does the pain ever go away |
|
hottnalabama
Opp, AL
59, joined Jun. 2012
|
oh yesssss trust me may take awhile butt then you forget
|
| 8/23/2012 2:00:18 AM |
Does the pain ever go away |
|
amsem4ofus
Lynbrook, NY
55, joined Aug. 2012
|
I'm still in the process of it going away, but it does get better. Each year that passes I look back and see the progress I've made from the year before and it gives me hope. I then have hope for the following year and have faith that things will get better. And they do! It is really important to get your feelings out even if you write them down in a journal and then look back at what you wrote and see your progress! The pain goes away slower for some than others. But it will go away faster is you don't hold onto the hate in your heart. That killed me the most. Once I let go of it, I was able free most of the pain and focus on my kids. They really gave me a reason to move on each day as hard as it was. It was by far the hardest thing I ever went through. Good luck to you all!!!
|
| 8/23/2012 1:09:20 PM |
Does the pain ever go away |
|
wpringle
Henderson, KY
41, joined May. 2012
|
You never forget the past. As memories fade the pain will not hurt as much as it used too. I was happily married the first 6-8 months. After that we fought tried our best to ruin each other's lives. We split for over 15yrs then got the divorce. To avoid the fighting we split every time someone saw her I wanted them to run her over. She tried to kill me numerous times lol. But I had two daughter's by her and didn't want them to receive those ways. The pain never goes away---experience is sometimes gained through pain I guess I learn the hard way. The wounds don't hurt as much as time passes and people learn to let it go.
|
| 8/23/2012 1:28:01 PM |
Does the pain ever go away |
|
lakecovelady40
Conway, AR
77, joined Oct. 2011
|
I`v been divorced 8 yrs. and my pain left me the day i left him, it was a welcome divorce, I don`t dwell on the past as i did my best to make it work, he did`nt do his part to help. Lied , cheated, was verbally abusive he killed my love for him. so I feel for all of you who still carry the pain around with you,, get over it ,, get a life and live again.
|
| 8/23/2012 5:28:17 PM |
Does the pain ever go away |
|
bimmer335
Fort Smith, AR
38, joined Aug. 2012
|
I've been divorced for over 2 years now. It still hurts. I just got out if a 2 year relationship in which we lived together. 6 weeks ago I came home and she was gone. She took all her things and most if mine. She drained my bank account leaving me with nothing. I haven't seen her since. I might as well go jump off a bridge
|
| 8/23/2012 5:41:15 PM |
Does the pain ever go away |
|
bimmer335
Fort Smith, AR
38, joined Aug. 2012
|
I've been divorced for over 2 years now. It still hurts. I just got out if a 2 year relationship in which we lived together. 6 weeks ago I came home and she was gone. She took all her things and most if mine. She drained my bank account leaving me with nothing. I haven't seen her since. I might as well go jump off a bridge
|
| 8/23/2012 6:30:26 PM |
Does the pain ever go away |
|
brneyz1005
Orlando, FL
42, joined Aug. 2012
|
Wow, I am reading a lot of these posts and... A. dont feel alone however the TRUE pain, where it hurts to BREATH, wherre every stupid commercial or show, passing by a store or a song makes you want to scream, laugh or cry... AND 2. Its def an emotional rollercoaster. Ultimatley, once you rediscover, snap out of that funk and GEAR your brain to think, he or she isnt returning. THEY LEFT BECAUSE THEY WANTED TO.... Never will I or shall chase, run after someone who doesnt want ME! You have to be confident, happy within or the PAIN so many speak of will continue and will make you Physically SICK! ITS NOT WORTH IT PEOPLE, MOVE ON! GET A NEW HOBBY!! FOCUS ON THE THINGS,PEOPLE THAT are good for you now. Its been almost 3 months for me but I am moving forward, not looking back to someone who left me. I'm just sayin... If you have trouble moving on, then rethink HOW you THINK! PONDER on that note... Peace 
|
| 8/29/2012 12:22:09 PM |
Does the pain ever go away |
|
tcretiredhippie
Durand, WI
59, joined Apr. 2012
|
Pain doesnt change, perception does
|
| 8/29/2012 10:52:18 PM |
Does the pain ever go away |
|
dlb2370
Royal Oak, MI
46, joined Jul. 2011
|
If everything was good none of us would be divorced. Why all the pain? Do you all want to live in misery just to be with someone? I didn't. Life is now better then ever. Come on people. 
|
| 8/30/2012 5:30:46 PM |
Does the pain ever go away |
|
meanduhunter
Henderson, NV
41, joined Feb. 2011
|
I've done the m word three times , it def. Gets easier  
|
| 9/5/2012 8:19:13 PM |
Does the pain ever go away |
|
buscandohispana
Miami Beach, FL
60, joined Jun. 2012
|
OP,
I feel you, still hurts.
"just let it go" why do so many people make such a stupid comment.
good luck, get laid.
|
| 10/3/2012 11:49:42 AM |
Does the pain ever go away |
|
sweet0415
Miami, FL
34, joined Aug. 2012
|
I GOT DIVORCES in December at first it was hard but as time go by it just get easier i just see how my life was when i was married and i see a much better off now everything happen for a reason and one day u going look at everything u going see it only made u stronger i just became friend with my ex a we are much better off as friends and we dont talk about our pass, we just hope the best for each other. now he there for me as friend something he didnt do when we were married he actually listen now lol. but help me most i turn to God and had a good find spoke about im feeling find someone u can trust and share ur feeling maybe that would help wish the best
|
| 10/3/2012 9:54:09 PM |
Does the pain ever go away |
|
hjc4312
Jackson, GA
41, joined Oct. 2012
|
Sorry to hear of your heartache. I completely understand how you feel-so many mixed emotions for me. My husband blind sided me with divorce as well. When you are in love with someone and you know no different, it is very hard. Over enough time, your heart will heal. I don't think mine will ever be whole again, but with enough time-my heart will be ready to love someone else one day. I keep myself busy with my boys-their daddy is living a busy life these days. Wish the best for you.
|
| 10/4/2012 7:54:08 AM |
Does the pain ever go away |
|
ron5161
Saint Paul, MN
57, joined Oct. 2012
|
 Been divorced since 2008, divorce started 2005. Married 22 years with 2 beautiful daughters. I still carry the guilt because I emotionally cheated and then crashed 'n burned mentally when I ripped myself out of the obsession. Lost my job & church connections in the deal. One daughter ok, the other an emotional wreck (the guilt part). Four and half years -- nah, it will never completely go away. Dating is fine but hard to find women willing to accept that I want to spend time with my daughters. Sucks.
In answer to the original question of this thread: It still hurts because it was one sided for you. I had emotionally dis-engauged from my ex and it was mutual. Even in that case, having children and being a father causes scars on them and you. It will never completely heal -- as long as they feel some lingering pain.
|
| 10/4/2012 3:04:14 PM |
Does the pain ever go away |
|
sorpstar
Little River, SC
65, joined Oct. 2009
|
My divorce has been final for nearly two years. Everytime I see or talk to my ex-wife it kills me physically and emotionally.I was blinded sided when she told me she wanted it. I begged to her to let us work on it. But no. Why does it still hurt so?
you're divorced and you agreed to it...so forgetaboutit...maybe add some spiritual conditions in talking to her for a last hope...but i'd move on because if this goes on longer someone on this site will NEVER want ya or whom you may meet in the real world (not DH)...i could see you dating someone and you keep bring up your ex spouse so IMO you are NOT even elgible to date anyone right now with a thread like this going for ya..>JMO
|
| 10/14/2012 6:51:11 PM |
Does the pain ever go away |
|
jimsmith7614
Chicago, IL
39, joined Nov. 2011
|
As my cousin said to me after my divorce; man up,don't be a p*ssy!!!! There will be something better out there.
|
| 10/14/2012 9:08:45 PM |
Does the pain ever go away |
|
loveurkids
Feeding Hills, MA
47, joined Jul. 2012
|
I never thought I would get thru my divorce but I did.the hurt will always b there but the pain will get better.I couldnt b happier toda y
|
| 10/14/2012 11:16:42 PM |
Does the pain ever go away |
|
ruttlesm
Hendersonville, NC
32, joined Oct. 2012
|
yes but not forgotten
|
| 10/15/2012 1:12:04 AM |
Does the pain ever go away |
|
cginer21
Riverside, CA
40, joined Oct. 2012
|
It took 3 to 4 yrs but yes it goes away no need to love someone that does not love you it feels good to be free and putting myself first
|
| 10/15/2012 1:30:06 AM |
Does the pain ever go away |
|
twinky035
Massapequa, NY
39, joined Oct. 2012
|
If it has been over two years. You need to move on. She has moved on. It will continue to hurt until you let her go. Find something to do a hobby or something. Go to the gym work out and look good. And start over again. I hope everything works out..
|
| 10/18/2012 10:52:50 PM |
Does the pain ever go away |
|
ray9843
Kingston, NY
52, joined Oct. 2012
|
I bought a Corvette I feel better now
|
| 10/21/2012 4:02:29 PM |
Does the pain ever go away |
|
riverjoegage
Sparta, TN
60, joined Jul. 2012
|
cant believe u would ever do meth...to nice looking 2 do that...
|
| 10/22/2012 2:09:24 AM |
Does the pain ever go away |
|
blkbarbied0ll
Long Island City, NY
39, joined Jul. 2012
|
I`v been divorced 8 yrs. and my pain left me the day i left him, it was a welcome divorce, I don`t dwell on the past as i did my best to make it work, he did`nt do his part to help. Lied , cheated, was verbally abusive he killed my love for him. so I feel for all of you who still carry the pain around with you,, get over it ,, get a life and live again.
|
| 10/22/2012 6:53:20 AM |
Does the pain ever go away |
|
xeoboi
San Antonio, TX
31, joined Sep. 2012
|
I am sorry to hear that bro, I am dealing with the same pain in my life as well. We were find while I was still in the Air Force and as soon as i got out to go to med school, she told me that life was going to be to hard for her just to sit around and wait so after 5 years of a wonderful life together she packed her bags and ran off. I gave her every thing and and I always supported her and believed in her standing by her side in everything she did. I coming to the understanding that only time will heal us, there is no magic pill, no hypnosis trick or any type of technology that can make us forget the love that we once shared with the people we chose to love that chose to leave us.
I know that this does not help any and at times the pain is truly unbearable but these words are all i have to give.
|
| 10/22/2012 5:13:11 PM |
Does the pain ever go away |
|
cupocheer
Assumption, IL
68, joined May. 2010
|
(this post has been flagged as inappropriate, sorry.)
|
| 10/23/2012 2:31:21 PM |
Does the pain ever go away |
|
blkbarbied0ll
Long Island City, NY
39, joined Jul. 2012
|
I`v been divorced 8 yrs. and my pain left me the day i left him, it was a welcome divorce, I don`t dwell on the past as i did my best to make it work, he did`nt do his part to help. Lied , cheated, was verbally abusive he killed my love for him. so I feel for all of you who still carry the pain around with you,, get over it ,, get a life and live again.
|
| 11/6/2012 9:14:55 AM |
Does the pain ever go away |
|
joetores79
Los Angeles, CA
38, joined Oct. 2012
|
Remember all the things she said and did to you. You need to remember how horrible she made you feel. Go out and start looking for some other trim and dont compare or talk to them about your ex. Im she sure is. Women can sometimes be the best therapy. Let her go and live your life because we only have one. She's really not the only broad in the world. And dont get married with the next broad you bone. Go dip your brush in every color of paint you can.
|
| 11/11/2012 2:20:43 AM |
Does the pain ever go away |
|
blkbarbied0ll
Long Island City, NY
39, joined Jul. 2012
|
|
| 11/11/2012 10:57:27 AM |
Does the pain ever go away |
|
cupocheer
Assumption, IL
68, joined May. 2010
|
|
| 11/12/2012 12:55:18 AM |
Does the pain ever go away |
|
kinkmanall
Riverside, CA
61, joined Sep. 2012
|
The pain comes 4 times a year
Merry Christmas, happy birthday kids.
|
| 11/19/2012 5:28:16 PM |
Does the pain ever go away |
|
bluehope518
Prague
Czech Republic
44, joined Jul. 2012
|
|
| 12/10/2012 3:24:10 PM |
Does the pain ever go away |
|
bluehope518
Prague
Czech Republic
44, joined Jul. 2012
|
.
|
| 12/15/2012 4:59:30 PM |
Does the pain ever go away |
|
funkster45
El Dorado Springs, MO
50, joined Sep. 2012
|
I was married 22yrs. it's been a year 1/2 . I still have love for him but know we will never be together again. I found that dating has helped the pain I felt.Good luck you to can be happy again.
|
| 12/16/2012 8:05:25 AM |
Does the pain ever go away |
|
biskit84
Anderson, SC
33, joined Feb. 2012
|
It depends on the situation man. My ex wife ran around on me so for me that's harder to get over than my divorce was I am actually glad in divorced I can only spend about two hours around her before I start wanting to punch her in the face but as for you I'm not sure that's a tough one
|
| 12/16/2012 2:47:44 PM |
Does the pain ever go away |
|
meece32
Coatesville, PA
37, joined Dec. 2012
|
I just recently came into this feeling and I hope it don't last 2years. I know I need to let to and move on, but its not going to be simple at all. 13 years and all I can think about is what we threw away. Any advice would be great.
|
| 12/16/2012 5:35:43 PM |
Does the pain ever go away |
|
despanker
Lucedale, MS
41, joined Dec. 2012
|
Not sure what to make of being recently seperated..looks like it will b a full blown divorce arnd of all things my birthday in febuary..i wanna work things out shes not making any attemp at it. She used a bs excyse for being drunk and haven sex with another man while she was supposed to be at a friends hs. Makes me wonder how many time she screwed arnd that she hasnt tild me about.
|
| 12/17/2012 12:18:39 PM |
Does the pain ever go away |
|
meece32
Coatesville, PA
37, joined Dec. 2012
|
Man same crap happened here.
|
| 12/25/2012 10:06:15 AM |
Does the pain ever go away |
|
bluehope518
Prague
Czech Republic
44, joined Jul. 2012
|
eventually yes...
|