Don't wanna get married!

2/1/2016 11:33:40 AM	Don't wanna get married!
giveuaccess Houston, TX 53, joined Jun. 2013	Quote from nyythawk: I think you're probably a very immature 53 yr. old if you need to come online and ask strangers a question like this, let alone CARE what they (we) think. 1. Other than a house, your kids probably won't even want your junk. I'm saying that because for some reason, I don't think any of it is actually valuable... not monetarily at least. 2. Be a grown up. If you don't want to marry, then you don't want to marry. You don't have to justify your feelings to anyone. 3. "Split them up" implies you'd EXPECT to fail if you did marry. So just another reason you shouldn't. 4. Tell your friend you sought counsel on DH. If he's smart, he'll dump you and wa-lah... problem solved. did not mean to make you angry Meet singles at DateHookup.dating, we're 100% free! Join now!
2/1/2016 11:40:20 AM	Don't wanna get married!
giveuaccess Houston, TX 53, joined Jun. 2013	Quote from cavie59: I have a question for you, if you did not have some of the material things that you have, but he did, would you still say no to marriage? still would not, at my age my choice don't wanna get married
2/1/2016 11:42:26 AM	Don't wanna get married!
grande_mamon Houston, TX 49, joined Sep. 2014	Quote from giveuaccess: still would not, at my age my choice don't wanna get married Then why bring up the whole property thing then
2/1/2016 11:46:45 AM	Don't wanna get married!
giveuaccess Houston, TX 53, joined Jun. 2013	Quote from stregaleonora: I am starting to think that the one who wanna get married is the one who got more to gain... Actually the same happens in reverse all the time: cute young women without any money and not really interested in a career wanted to get married with a lawyer, a doctor or a wealthy businessman.... No, you are not being selfish. You need to do what makes you happy and what is convenient for you and your children. Tell to your companion that you don't want to get married. Period. Why does he want to get married by the way? If you live together where is the difference?? That makes me think that guy really has an eye on your money...be careful. don't live together he lives in an apartment, but thanks for your response.
2/1/2016 11:56:52 AM	Don't wanna get married!
giveuaccess Houston, TX 53, joined Jun. 2013	Quote from bumblebee7: Its funny....how men having some material things is so important to women....and how many women out there have no material things of any importants or value....then hope to con some dude and move in and call it all theirs too....his house, car and etc. Between this and the ops thread here....should be a wake call to all men. " f*k taking women serious" They are not what the myth claims....all they are is human, no better than men. Just as capable of lying and everything else. and in reality, take away the pssy....they really have nothing to offer. were are you finding these women surly not Jamaica
2/1/2016 5:00:46 PM	Don't wanna get married!
xman379 Richmond, VA 37, joined Nov. 2015 online now!	Quote from giveuaccess: The man that I have been dating for two years wants to get married, I told him when we first met that I was just looking for friendship companion and a traveling partner and it was okay with him, but now he kept on and on about us getting married, I do have feelings for him but I don't want to get married. I have accomplished some material things in life and don't want to split them with anyone, this stuff will be for my kids when I'm gone. Now do you all think I'm selfish or I'm being to hard on my friend and companion? A little of both. 1. There's nothing wrong with being a LITTLE selfish. It's called SELF preservation. 2. Your material prosperity probably shouldn't be the primary reason you won't marry him. You CAN always have him sign a prenup, though he MAY be a bit offended. I'm sure if he truly loves you for your personality and not your material prosperity, he'll understand and probably won't have a problem with it. Apparently he just wants to hold on to you and sees marriage as the best way to do so. Whatever the case, you should have a serious discussion with him about it and express your concerns/reservations.
2/1/2016 6:11:12 PM	Don't wanna get married!
lucky_1million Pewaukee, WI 49, joined Jun. 2013	Quote from cavie59: I have a question for you, if you did not have some of the material things that you have, but he did, would you still say no to marriage? My aunt made the decision to not marry her long-time companion of 20 years. They did the math early on and it came out that they would both lose some financial benefits by getting married. So, they moved in with each other. She had a lake home that she wants to leave for the kids. It is very nice. He has a hobby farm, where they both live together now. He would like to leave the farm to the kids. This is equally nice. Would I marry my current boyfriend after being together for 10 or 20 years... and things going really well? Who knows? Maybe I would.
2/1/2016 6:46:06 PM	Don't wanna get married!
pickygirl72 Barrow, AK 45, joined Sep. 2011	Just tell him you do not want to marry him.
2/2/2016 12:57:14 AM	Don't wanna get married!
enigmaathand Leavittsburg, OH 35, joined Mar. 2013	Quote from giveuaccess: were are you finding these women surly not Jamaica Just walk down any sidewalk, in the United States. You are guaranteed to find one, usually pushing a baby stroller.
2/2/2016 5:15:09 AM	Don't wanna get married!
bumblebee7 Fort Payne, AL 61, joined Apr. 2011 online now!	Op...again...its one thing if you don't to marry someone, because they are not the right person, or you don't love them. but for the reasons you stated, yes, it is extremely selfish. To me, you should strive to be more upfront and honest and tell men from the get go...how you feel about this and why....just as you stated here. But, because you don't....that even shows more extreme selfishness, plus a lack of respect to where they would have the chance to decide if they are potentially wasting their time with you....knowing there is no option...if that present itself to them. and what was it you were saying about Jamaican Women?????????????????? not looking too good are they.???
2/2/2016 5:21:08 AM	Don't wanna get married!
bumblebee7 Fort Payne, AL 61, joined Apr. 2011 online now!	Quote from grneyesrme: What is his reasoning for wanting to get married? I've been married & don't really want to do it again. I think marriage is an institution for kids. Mine are grown. I would only get married again if it made sense for insurance, financial reasons for both people. Here's my views on marriage. If your not married....you can walk out the door, just like that...and that's it. You can't just do that if your married. So that makes marriage the ultimate commitment....and shows you really have those feelings for sure.....to take on a commitment like that and I'm sorry to me....it means more than just a piece of paper. People who shun marriage, to me are simply afraid to make such a commitment and don't trust themselves anymore than they trust other people and need the scape goat of not being married....so they can bail if everything isn't going their way all the time. And, those types are going to do that same thing...whether they are in just a relation or a marriage. and that's that.
2/2/2016 5:35:18 AM	Don't wanna get married!
bumblebee7 Fort Payne, AL 61, joined Apr. 2011 online now!	Quote from frappeyes: Why so harsh with op? She is 53 years old and lives in a community property state. If things go wrong in a marriage, she cannot magically make herself younger and re-earn thirty years worth of income saved toward retirement. This is not "selfishness" or "hoarding" as some of you seem to believe. She doesn't want to be a burden on her children - who does? She is looking pragmatically at her situation. For those of you that think only men have to deal with the "I want a meal ticket/gold digger" type of individual - trust me, it works both ways. Women also quite frequently encounter these individuals. I remember Settee posting one time that a man asked her on a meetup date what her net worth was. At my age, we call it: he's looking for a "nurse with a purse". Well....I'm quite sure if this had been a man posting this.....even you would have been all over his ass, and so would many of the women who responded....I'd even wager $5000 in a bet that would happen and certainly become $5000 richer to boot. First off....she was never upfront about how she feels about this and why from the get go....in this particular case....she should be upfront about this....not so much the marriage part...but her reasoning behind that. I'd want to know that reasoning...because it would be a dead red flag pertaining to an attitude....I'd run from. Next....lets put this into perspective, pertaining to what each gender considers important to them.....I doubt many, if any men would decline marriage for the sake of giving their kids more money when they die off. So lets word the male equal to this thread shall we? Here it is....""""hi, I have this problem....ya see, I got involved with this girl and it stated out casual, and all I wanted was a companion, some sex and someone to do things with....however we have been exclusive for two years now, and she is getting serious and talking about marriage a lot. Sure, I was the feelings...but damn, I worked all my life for the money and things that I have and I don't want to share that with anyone. Hell...fk that...I'd rather keep things as they are....an use my money to buy me a new Vette and a few more guns and things, that I want. If that blows her away and hurts her...what do I care???""""" """"There you go, the male equal to her post.""""" And be honest here....if some guy who no one here ever saw posted my example above. you know damn well....th women and some of the men....would be all over his a for posting it and calling him this, that and the other for it. and if you say otherwise....your a damn liar. [Edited 2/2/2016 5:36:44 AM ]
2/2/2016 5:51:46 AM	Don't wanna get married!
bumblebee7 Fort Payne, AL 61, joined Apr. 2011 online now!	Again....I emphasize....its not that she doesn't want to get married.....its her reasoning behind that....that's the issue here. Especially since for thousands of years, men sacrificed what they wanted in material things...to support, protect and etc...to take care of their wife and her kids....and here 40 years after women got the chance to enter the work force and how selfish they are. The thing that really cracks me up and lower's women's credibility even more. Is the high standard women hold men too....and how critical they are of men and this standard...and how they complain about all these things about men. But, when it comes to their standards...suddenly everything changes, anything goes and too bad...men will just have to put up with this. and this is the format of most modern relations. then you have the gall to wonder what went wrong in these relations and even have more gall, to lay the blame always on the men. The thing is...many things are not gender specific...and when in love, a man is no different than women in many things of what they want from, her and this relation. and obviously if they are not getting it, they won't be happy and eventually it will show,....and that will cause him to change. The moral here? Grow up please....start giving what you expect to get...get your own standards as high as you set them for men. Then watch as relations get better and better....instead of worse and worse. That's what an adult does....a child accepts no blame and is always pointing at others as the culprit. All the op did with her reasoning here, is prove what men say about women these days in a negative way....is true. [Edited 2/2/2016 5:53:59 AM ]
2/2/2016 6:41:03 AM	Don't wanna get married!
soulflight Baltimore, MD 54, joined Apr. 2014	Seriously Bee..one woman does not speak for the mindset of "women". Her reasons don't matter to anyone but her. The fact that she is even asking..a supposed grown woman..is what is laughable.
2/2/2016 6:42:56 AM	Don't wanna get married!
blurussian Tarawa Terrace, NC 27, joined Dec. 2015	Quote from stregaleonora: Be careful... If you wanna give all yourself...make sure the guy isn't a moron before... ..and don't give all yourself cone on... ..keep your mind.. I didn't say I wished to become some kind of human doormat-- to be walked on, did I? And, I have my own presence of mind and self-worth that any man I become involved with WILL NOT be a MORON; nor, do I want to be the abuser of any moronic individual, either. C'mon now, use some of your own common sense.
2/2/2016 3:27:56 PM	Don't wanna get married!
giveuaccess Houston, TX 53, joined Jun. 2013	Quote from bumblebee7: Op...again...its one thing if you don't to marry someone, because they are not the right person, or you don't love them. but for the reasons you stated, yes, it is extremely selfish. To me, you should strive to be more upfront and honest and tell men from the get go...how you feel about this and why....just as you stated here. But, because you don't....that even shows more extreme selfishness, plus a lack of respect to where they would have the chance to decide if they are potentially wasting their time with you....knowing there is no option...if that present itself to them. and what was it you were saying about Jamaican Women?????????????????? not looking too good are they.??? thanks for your opinion, and Jamaican women does not use men they work hard for what they have, I know because I'm one.

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