| 7/6/2013 10:02:53 AM |
What scares you most in a relationship? |
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baby_pink86
Worden, MT
30, joined Jun. 2013
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There are only two things that will actually scare me off in a relationship. I have plenty that turn me off, same as everyone else, but these two things will send me running for sure.
Binging up the L word too soon. Too many people say "I love you" without thought. I refuse to say this until I know for sure that I do. Love, to me, is complex. Many people confuse lust with love.
The other is the M word. I'm still not sure that I ever want to marry again so bringing up this with me is a big no no. I had a guy talk about what our life would be like when we got married. We'd only been seeing each other got a few weeks. 
So I'm just curious, what everyone else is scared of. Is there anything done or said by your date that will send you running never to look back?
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| 7/6/2013 10:55:04 AM |
What scares you most in a relationship? |
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1girliegirlie
Philadelphia, PA
51, joined Apr. 2013
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Mostly I'm scared that the man I meet and begin to have feelings for becomes a different man once he knows he's "got" me.
And before everyone piles on to attack me, I know women do this too.
It's understood that when you first meet someone you're getting the very best of them. But if they change into someone completely different after you've invested time and emotion, that really hurts.
Oh, and I've also experienced having the man I fall in love with trying to change me. Like suddenly he has a problem with everything I do and he wants to turn me into someone else.
Again, don't bother preaching that women do this too. I know.
[Edited 7/6/2013 10:57:48 AM ]
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| 7/6/2013 2:48:59 PM |
What scares you most in a relationship? |
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baby_pink86
Worden, MT
30, joined Jun. 2013
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I know exactly what you mean. My husband was that way. He was awesome until our first anniversary. He became a lazy no good bum that didn't seem to care about me anymore. We had a baby and he thought I wouldn't go anywhere. Well I proved him wrong. Lol
[Edited 7/6/2013 2:49:22 PM ]
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| 7/6/2013 5:32:06 PM |
What scares you most in a relationship? |
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1girliegirlie
Philadelphia, PA
51, joined Apr. 2013
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We had a baby and he thought I wouldn't go anywhere. Well I proved him wrong. Lol
So weird that you said this... the only other LTR I've been in, after my husband, when we fought he used to always tell me to get the f out of his house. After about the 3rd time hearing that I went and got my own place. When I told him, he flipped out. He got my birth control pills and smashed them with a hammer. I said why? WHY would you do that? He said, if the only way to make you stick is to get you knocked up, then so be it. Yikes. I didn't let that happen. But yeah...weird.
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| 7/7/2013 1:29:50 AM |
What scares you most in a relationship? |
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good_dr
Spokane, WA
53, joined Dec. 2011
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Trying to changed me into willing to make another child. Finding little hidden mental pill box's. Heavy drinking or heavy drugs. Actually what's the difference?
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| 7/7/2013 9:36:01 AM |
What scares you most in a relationship? |
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good_dr
Spokane, WA
53, joined Dec. 2011
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As it turns out, my ex wife used to be on prescription anti- depressants before I met her. She had been off them while we dated and when we got married, and NOBODY, not her, or her parents, or her friends, ever informed me of her having been on anti-depressants. She began to complain how unhappy she was after two years of marriage, and we ultimately divorced. More than two years since then she emails me out of the blue catching me up on her life, and writes to me that over the past two years she has suffered greatly from depression. My fear is that I will meet a woman who pretends to be happy, yet she is secretly depressed, and after a while I'll be blamed for her whole world caving in, when all I ever tried to do was be a good husband, provider, and supporter.
G
I hear that one as well. Scary what those drugs will do to a person. Been there, done that, and never again.
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| 7/7/2013 1:30:34 PM |
What scares you most in a relationship? |
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rivverratt1
Simms, TX
45, joined Feb. 2013
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Someone that has to know my every move I make, getting pissed if I don't text back or call.....A clingy, needy b*tch....
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| 7/7/2013 5:01:39 PM |
What scares you most in a relationship? |
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baby_pink86
Worden, MT
30, joined Jun. 2013
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Someone that has to know my every move I make, getting pissed if I don't text back or call.....A clingy, needy b*tch....
Omg, I hate hate hate that! About a year ago, I had a guy send me 52 text messages during the night, asking me why I wasn't replying I woke up the next morning pissed. There was no need, he knew I worked early shifts yet he expected me to be awake whenever he wanted to talk. Needless to say I didn't meet him for a second date.
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| 7/7/2013 11:39:41 PM |
What scares you most in a relationship? |
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anja_lou514
Kissimmee, FL
42, joined May. 2011
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The scariest part to me is trusting them not to be "like all the others". 
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| 7/8/2013 9:01:09 AM |
What scares you most in a relationship? |
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baby_pink86
Worden, MT
30, joined Jun. 2013
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The scariest part to me is trusting them not to be "like all the others".
I know that one. They all promise, "I'm not like the other guys" and in the end must of then are the same and I'm left even more alone than I was before
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| 7/11/2013 6:56:03 AM |
What scares you most in a relationship? |
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denisevnyc75
Jersey City, NJ
42, joined Jul. 2013
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No eye to eye contact . No communication.
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| 7/11/2013 7:06:06 AM |
What scares you most in a relationship? |
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luckylibragal
Mesa, AZ
49, joined Oct. 2011
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Being monitored and controlled.Never again!
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| 7/11/2013 8:41:01 AM |
What scares you most in a relationship? |
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keithporch
Orange, NJ
60, joined Jan. 2012
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Yes we r still out here!
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| 7/22/2013 6:04:35 PM |
What scares you most in a relationship? |
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aprilmc83
Hernando, FL
33, joined May. 2013
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for me trust is something that scares me.
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| 7/23/2013 11:13:46 AM |
What scares you most in a relationship? |
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jazzlvr65
Port Huron, MI
51, joined May. 2013
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Someone who wants to control every aspect of my life, Calls/texts 50 times a day. Doesnt want me to have any friends or do anything without her there.
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| 7/25/2013 1:39:48 AM |
What scares you most in a relationship? |
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liked2meetu
Euless, TX
52, joined Dec. 2012
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That I would meet a person who's timing is not the same as mine...Either you meet a person & they fall in love with you but you don't or you meet someone that u fall in love with but he doesn't. The timing has to be just right to make it happen!
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| 7/27/2013 8:36:58 PM |
What scares you most in a relationship? |
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wonderwoman321
Conway, AR
42, joined Jul. 2013
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On any relationship it is giving with your whole heart and getting left and hurt
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| 7/28/2013 1:09:57 PM |
What scares you most in a relationship? |
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happytexasgal
Terre Haute, IN
66, joined Jul. 2013
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True honesty are they being sincere or just telling you what you what to hear. I was in a relationship last year for 3 mos . He told he loved me and wanted to be with me and even told me someday we are moving in together but let's not hurry take our time. I truly believed him and one day he just stopped talking to me never return my calls. Not bitter though life goes on . There is such a thing as Karma.
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| 7/28/2013 1:57:14 PM |
What scares you most in a relationship? |
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rebecca447
Tulsa, OK
50, joined Jul. 2013
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rejection
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| 7/28/2013 9:22:40 PM |
What scares you most in a relationship? |
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purelife118
Benton, AR
40, joined Jul. 2013
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With anything being hurt having your heart ripped apart but its a chance you have to take and hope and pray that the person you love or be with loves you back and give them the benefit of the doubt and give them trust,put your guard down that they won't break your heart
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| 7/30/2013 2:05:27 PM |
What scares you most in a relationship? |
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luckylouie42
Cedar Grove, WV
74, joined Mar. 2008
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a woman who carries a pistol in her purse. 
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| 7/31/2013 4:27:16 PM |
What scares you most in a relationship? |
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sylvercloud
Mount Washington, KY
45, joined Jul. 2013
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What scares me the most is finding that perfect man....then having him walk away because HE is too scared that I am too perfect for him. Had that happen...It hurts. Especially when I didn't do anything wrong but did everything right.
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| 8/3/2013 3:36:00 PM |
What scares you most in a relationship? |
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marcieowens
Wadesville, IN
46, joined May. 2013
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Everything! I just cant risk it.
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| 8/4/2013 2:27:08 AM |
What scares you most in a relationship? |
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jakthalikker
Mc Leansboro, IL
52, joined Apr. 2013
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Finding an EPT in the trash can after 3 weeks of dating 
Lmao..nah just kiddin' 
I would have to say the 5 different kinds of meds..dated a few that were "depressed" and even one that was bipolar.. 
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| 8/4/2013 8:13:41 AM |
What scares you most in a relationship? |
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donuwanna
Evansville, IN
54, joined Mar. 2010
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Being lied to after "we"have gone beyond the point of telling one another i love you. Deal breaker for me especially if it is about some trivial bs.
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| 8/4/2013 9:17:53 AM |
What scares you most in a relationship? |
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pamdan
Grand Blanc, MI
54, joined Aug. 2012
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Nothing really scares me but clinginess turns me off right away. I once met a guy for lunch and before the end of the night I had over 25 text from him, which went were not responded to. The next day he was texting and asking what I was doing. The text I did respond to was one that said I would like to see you again. To that I wrote, "if this would have been the only text you sent me in the last 24 hours, I would have agreed, however your clinginess is a huge turn off."
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| 8/4/2013 7:32:23 PM |
What scares you most in a relationship? |
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rainbow4keeps
Washington, IN
51, joined Aug. 2013
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Nothing scares me anymore. I have dealt with the cons in my life. And I feel like I am sincerely ready. I have worked very hard on becoming the right woman for the right man.
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| 8/14/2013 7:18:03 AM |
What scares you most in a relationship? |
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cupocheer
Assumption, IL
68, joined May. 2010
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Death of the beloved spouse.
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| 8/14/2013 10:40:49 AM |
What scares you most in a relationship? |
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lookin4him2012
Boone, NC
49, joined Jan. 2012
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Quote from anja_lou514: The scariest part to me is trusting them not to be "like all the others".
_______________________________________
I agree, this one is tough and the older you get and the more hurt you get the harder it is!
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| 8/15/2013 6:54:55 PM |
What scares you most in a relationship? |
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alicia1031
Temecula, CA
29, joined Oct. 2012
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being clingy.. i get really spooked when a man starts talking a future after one date. or if the guy is too willing to change himself.. call me crazy but what happened to being yourself and letting someone see if you mesh well without changing core values?
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| 8/22/2013 7:43:08 PM |
What scares you most in a relationship? |
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purelife118
Benton, AR
40, joined Jul. 2013
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Not being loved enough in return when you love someone with all your heart
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| 8/23/2013 12:11:54 PM |
What scares you most in a relationship? |
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daisymaple82
Bremerton, WA
35, joined Aug. 2013
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Failure
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| 8/23/2013 6:46:56 PM |
What scares you most in a relationship? |
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luckylouie42
Cedar Grove, WV
74, joined Mar. 2008
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a physco
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| 8/25/2013 2:13:01 PM |
What scares you most in a relationship? |
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nanasunday
Fremont, IN
50, joined Aug. 2013
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was married for 26yrs from age 19 to 45.....not sure how to tell if the man I really care about really cares bout me. all those years of being out of the loop makes me feel anxious.
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| 8/27/2013 7:52:58 PM |
What scares you most in a relationship? |
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pdforone
Litchfield, OH
65, joined Jul. 2010
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" What scares you most in a relationship? "
Usually fear of laughing at them when trying to follow their logic. I don't let it stop me from doing so though.
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| 8/31/2013 4:09:08 PM |
What scares you most in a relationship? |
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want2bnlove2013
Fort Wayne, IN
38, joined Apr. 2013
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Getting attached to someone that is not faithful. Once I find a man that I connect with and vice versa I want him to be my one and only and me his one and only.
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| 9/1/2013 12:49:28 AM |
What scares you most in a relationship? |
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kydavid67
Windsor, KY
49, joined Jul. 2013
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I understand
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| 9/2/2013 2:55:06 PM |
What scares you most in a relationship? |
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rey2140
Sullivan, OH
47, joined Sep. 2013
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somebody that wants to rush into it. Send me the other direction every time.
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| 9/8/2013 12:12:50 AM |
What scares you most in a relationship? |
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glorialee3013
Bonifay, FL
51, joined Sep. 2013
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HELLO I AM GLORIA AND NOW ITS HARD FOR ME TO TRUST ITS LIKE EVERYONE IS PLAYING GAMES
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| 9/9/2013 2:30:36 AM |
What scares you most in a relationship? |
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d_voted
Winnipeg, MB
64, joined Sep. 2008
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The woman.
D
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| 9/16/2013 8:06:21 AM |
What scares you most in a relationship? |
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luckylibragal
Mesa, AZ
49, joined Oct. 2011
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Disappearing acts. One would think that after 8 months of dating he falls off the planet and doesn't even call.My gf finally called him and he made it official.No wonder he has never been married! What a flake!
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| 9/25/2013 9:12:11 PM |
What scares you most in a relationship? |
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mykal_adams
Orlando, FL
44, joined Aug. 2013
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Compromise. You have to have it in order to have a healthy relationship.
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| 9/25/2013 9:19:03 PM |
What scares you most in a relationship? |
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angeleyes4400
Cranston, RI
35, joined Feb. 2013
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opening up to someone again just to get my heart broken.....
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| 10/13/2013 9:18:40 PM |
What scares you most in a relationship? |
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wk1965
Suwanee, GA
51, joined Aug. 2013
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That I might be getting played!! I'm very honest and geniune but fear men are not capable of the same.
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| 10/21/2013 10:17:34 PM |
What scares you most in a relationship? |
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sweetate2
Albion, IN
67, joined Jul. 2013
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That I might be getting played!! I'm very honest and geniune but fear men are not capable of the same.
I agree seems just when you fall in love it all falls apart..
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| 10/22/2013 4:35:41 AM |
What scares you most in a relationship? |
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moneyman8600
Isanti, MN
30, joined Oct. 2013
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Getting used or taken advantage of. Or plan a wedding then 6 months before the wedding she decides she doesn't want the life we have and leaves (happened last year) me with a broken heart
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| 10/22/2013 5:12:08 PM |
What scares you most in a relationship? |
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lookin4him2012
Boone, NC
49, joined Jan. 2012
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I agree with the OP (even though she's gone now) that the L and M words are the biggest in a relationship. My current boyfriend talked about marriage a little too soon for me but later on I wanted the same thing and we are now engaged. The love word we both said at exactly the same time though. 
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| 10/23/2013 12:44:42 AM |
What scares you most in a relationship? |
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ladiebugg55
Redding, CA
61, joined Jun. 2012
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Insecure men that cling..cant stand to be smothered. I wear make up and perfume everyday plus I always dress nice, dont question me about my grooming habbits or ask me to stop!..NOT going to happen..
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| 10/23/2013 2:39:35 PM |
What scares you most in a relationship? |
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aladytoo
Monroe, WI
60, joined Apr. 2006
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Lack of communication,breaks down every part of a relationship.
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| 12/6/2013 12:48:56 AM |
What scares you most in a relationship? |
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billyidol
Phoenix, AZ
44, joined Jun. 2008
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Giving all of myself to some one.
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| 12/9/2013 11:09:12 AM |
What scares you most in a relationship? |
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okiefun48
Orleans, NE
58, joined Oct. 2007
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a gold digger!
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| 12/9/2013 6:51:37 PM |
What scares you most in a relationship? |
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msshirleym
Elkhorn, WI
73, joined Nov. 2013
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Met guy on a different site...turned out he' d stolen another man's identity ...tried scamming me ...even though I thought he might be the one...had too many things didn' t add up! I did some checking, talked to man in Florida, the creep had stolen id of. Reported him to local pd... not much they can do. Need to be very, very careful as lots of creeps out there. Am very cautious now. May not take chance again 'cause of this scumbag!!!!
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| 12/9/2013 8:41:30 PM |
What scares you most in a relationship? |
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cupocheer
Assumption, IL
68, joined May. 2010
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illness
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| 12/10/2013 11:24:06 PM |
What scares you most in a relationship? |
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python1363
Los Angeles, CA
54, joined Jun. 2013
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Nothing, I love the unknown.........
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| 12/11/2013 9:28:15 PM |
What scares you most in a relationship? |
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jwiley079
Waldorf, MD
37, joined May. 2013
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Scared to be hurt, but always willing to try.
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| 12/12/2013 7:46:50 PM |
What scares you most in a relationship? |
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lookin4him2012
Boone, NC
49, joined Jan. 2012
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This thread is from 5 months ago. 
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| 12/14/2013 8:38:04 AM |
What scares you most in a relationship? |
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cupocheer
Assumption, IL
68, joined May. 2010
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a liar
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| 12/23/2013 7:10:12 AM |
What scares you most in a relationship? |
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sankie1
Irvine, KY
69, joined Dec. 2011
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Giving all of myself to some one.
Perhaps my thinking on the giving of oneself is all wrong, but I believe we share, we give, but we also keep a bit our ME for oneself. I'm thinking it's the private secrets we harbor silently, that builds the most suspicion and causes the most trouble. Me, I just say I've lived this long and everyone has a past so when I'm ready to go into the future with someone I will leave the past behind. If they are not satisfied with that then I will not fully disclose. Some things are just private and not to be shared, while ignoring and covering up as if it didn't happen isn't facing the facts. Those needing to know everything about you is not living in the real world.
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| 12/27/2013 1:08:01 PM |
What scares you most in a relationship? |
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tyler74171
Mauldin, SC
43, joined Jul. 2013
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Every woman will be the same.
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| 1/5/2014 1:47:18 PM |
What scares you most in a relationship? |
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sankie1
Irvine, KY
69, joined Dec. 2011
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