2/1/2008 8:32:51 AM |
validating ones self..... |
|
gonesailingbabe
Des Moines, IA
age: 44
|
hey soprano -I'm NOT bagging lovesillusion - she's a nice young thing who is making her way as a single mom and trying to find love....
she's young and maybe has made some bad judgments in the past (if you read her posts you can see she's a fun, flirty young thing) those aren't crimes and don't have to be a pattern for life....
There in lies the truth of growing into who you are
wh*re or lady
and valuing YOURSELF
which I think??? is the original question here...
|
2/1/2008 8:35:50 AM |
validating ones self..... |
|
lovesillusion11
Moab, UT
age: 24
|
i do flirt... but that does not mean i will sleep with them....
so really how long do you wait for it?
i am not saying i have not walked down the not so proper pasths in the past... ok that was a choice i made..... and that is something i live with..... that does not mean i hate myself..... because everything in my past makes me who i am now.... which i see myself as a decent person... because you may not... because of things on here... you don't live my day to day life and until you do don't judge me...
my offence taken on this is because you say women become wh*res because of self hatered.. in which looking deeper they may hate themselves..... or maybe they did have feelings and the guy screwed them over.... did you walk in their shoes.. can you look through their eyes?
maybe it is a grudge..... maybe they just like sex.... whatever the reason... i don't think it should of been directed towards women alone...
the degrading of people like that is what gives them self hatered and low self-esteem... so in a way you are turning them into wh*res by lableing people like that..... if so many look at women in that way....... weather they are or not... then maybe some do it because it is not worth the battle?
as far as picking the not so "decent" guys who jus want sex...... yes i have had issues with having bad judement in the past..... and now i want to take my time and get to know people first and i get bashed for that too....
is there a win or loose in this situation?
i see everyone elses point too.... but i tell my opion and feel that it was a direct hit in degrading women and took offence in it..... and all of a sudden people who don't know me start getting in their mind that i am a wh*re and i have issues with my daddy and things as such? once again degrading.....
i guess i looked at it in a different perspective.....
|
2/1/2008 8:37:19 AM |
validating ones self..... |
|
nashoba_miko
Bethany, OK
age: 38
|
Wow.....thats nuts dude. What makes you think some women sleep with a lot of guys just to validate herself? There could be MANY reasons why she does it....ONE being....she got tired of getting played and decided to date like a dude. Guys do it all the time...no one says anything......but if women do it....they are insecure or wh*res?!?!?!?
|
2/1/2008 8:38:40 AM |
validating ones self..... |
|
tsoprano81
Colorado Springs, CO
age: 26
|
i so agree with you babe. i first of all didnt dog anything. she in fact was the one that started on the defence. im sure shes a great girl and has just made some wrong choices, wich we all have. im no saint by any means but i dont just give myself to any woman that will give it to me either. i prefer to know who they are and what they are like. to me, its all about the feelings that you share, the passion of knowing that person. i tend not to look at women as just some piece of meat, i want more out of it.
|
2/1/2008 8:38:53 AM |
validating ones self..... |
|
crowdog3
Ponca City, OK
age: 34
|
|
2/1/2008 8:40:20 AM |
validating ones self..... |
|
waytogo51
Prairie Grove, AR
age: 51 online now!
|
I have never understood the male/female thing on this.
Way back when I was in high school, if a guy had been with different girls he was a stud. BUT if a girl was with different guys, she was easy and a slut. That is totally wrong. Not saying we should be with different ppl all the time. But it no better for the guy than it is with the girl.
Had a friend who I used to work with who was married and cheated on his wife all the time. I had never been married at that time and asked him why he did it. He told me there was nothing wrong with a man getting a little strange every now and then. I asked him how he would feel if he got off work early and went home and found his wife getting a little strange. He said he would kill her if she did that. Still confused on that one. Same as I am still confused on the guy being a stud and the girl being a slut.
|
2/1/2008 8:42:10 AM |
validating ones self..... |
|
grneyedluvr
Waverly, NY
age: 42
|
ok lets validate shall we? what constitutes a wh*re? to me a wh*re is a cheater. im not going to condemn someone for having muliple partners nor am i going to condemn lil miss romantic for bein able to count her lovers on one hand. all im simply saying here is that most of the reason for the hate is because these guys have been hurt and cheated on or whatever. to each their own if someone wants to get their freak on with every tom d*ck and harry , so be it. if someone wants to be romanced till the guys balls turn blue so be that. im just tired of guys and girls getting upset because there are those of us that enjoy getting the pleasures out of life. enuff said brb im gonna go rub one out.
|
2/1/2008 8:44:02 AM |
validating ones self..... |
|
gonesailingbabe
Des Moines, IA
age: 44
|
nashoba!!!!!! I'm amazed! Usually I expect the love and peace response from you!
You go girl!!!!!
Loves, sweetie - you're on the right track... you ARE.
The thing is it's hard to grow up a girl...I didn't get there til I was in my 30's.
YOu have to figure out what matters to you.
I could make suggestions to you about what those things SHOULD be - but those would be strictly my opinions and you may go insane trying to apply them in your life.
It's like one of those lessons we learn young like:
"Stop! Drop! Roll!"
Or
"Stop! Look! Listen!"
I can be dangerously impetuous - in going with the moment and the passion..(howdy, green eyes!)
I can leap right into the freaking fire - and have!
You are the only one who can become your own "gate keeper"
You have to learn when to hit the gas and when to hit the brake
and how to live with those choices.
Trust me - when you REALLY get the wrong dude because you "went with the moment" and you wake up with six broken ribs, 170 stitches and your sons are devastated because their "new" dad did this to their mom
You'll find Jesus real fast.
Be smart - don't allow anyone to put YOU in that situation. I'm a damn smart woman and these things can happen to women who are strong and smart...
So just be your own best protector and think before you jump.
|
2/1/2008 8:45:48 AM |
validating ones self..... |
|
waytogo51
Prairie Grove, AR
age: 51 online now!
|
Grneyed why are you bashing Gone for being able to count on her fingers. I appauld her for that. I wish that I could say that. Don't put some one down for the way they feel.
[Edited 2/1/2008 8:47:33 AM]
|
2/1/2008 8:46:14 AM |
validating ones self..... |
|
cherokeerose07
Pottsboro, TX
age: 48
|
listen to sailin she really is a damn smart women
|
2/1/2008 8:49:04 AM |
validating ones self..... |
|
gonesailingbabe
Des Moines, IA
age: 44
|
Hey I get a little strange and kinky once in awhile too...the people who KNOW me - know this!
he he he he and you know who they are - they have the handcuffs and goofy grins!!!!
I'm just saying - I am choosy about who I do.
And that's OK - doesn't make me a swooning,poetic dumb ass....
makes me sorta smart I think????
|
2/1/2008 8:54:21 AM |
validating ones self..... |
|
grneyedluvr
Waverly, NY
age: 42
|
man yall need to re=read my thread for f*cks sake. im not bashing anyone! did you read live and let live? holy hell. and sailing if i offended thee i apologize, but wasnt my intention. now cmere and give this bad boy a beating!
|
2/1/2008 8:56:55 AM |
validating ones self..... |
|
waytogo51
Prairie Grove, AR
age: 51 online now!
|
Sorry Grneyed I guess I took it the wrong way. I don't mean to start anything, but just don't like to see ppl put down for something they believe in. Please do forgive me for taking it the wrong way.
|
2/1/2008 9:00:04 AM |
validating ones self..... |
|
lovesillusion11
Moab, UT
age: 24
|
i am not saying that i know it all! i am far from it.. the ex was the best at degrading. but i love myself and my children.... if i didn't i wouldn't of found the strength to leave the ex... he was a very controling man (went as far as grounding me)(so tommy if it was a daddy i was looking for i would of stayed with him!) that did it for me... and i will admit i did put up with his shit for way too long..... but wasn't like that to start with..
i had to grow up early.... because of the choices i made..... i don't think that made me a bad person... just cleared my thinking quite a bit...
i have a lot of people who have labeled me a "wh*re" simply because i am 24 with 4 kids..... yes i got preggy at 16.... and yes i was drunk when it happend and at a party.... i am not so proud of that night.... but i am VERY proud of the results! i now have a 7 year old who is smart as a whip and a very strong and powerful young man that will make a very special woman very lucky someday... the same with my second (which was with the same man.... turned into a relationship) as far as the other two kids i have they have the same father too....... both 5 year relationships....... my kids are shown nothing but love.... and i feel in order to do that i must love myself.... if i didn't how could i show them love?
because of my past and the roads i have taken... i have chosen to learn from them to improve my life and the lives of my children.
i am not one of the statistics of young mothers who could care less about the lil thing that jus popped out! i stood up and i took responsibility! i righted my wrong.... and for people to judge when knowing nothing about the road i have been down and the stone i stand on now... jus somewhat hits me wrong... i could easliy go out and party every night... or not try to provide for my kids... let the state take over in raising them.... there are many out there who do... or even worse... leave them in dumpsters... or at malls alone... but i don't..... i work.... and i come home.... usually if i go somewhere my kids are with me unless it's a situation in which they shouldn't... i put myself first (because i need to be healthy and strong in order to take care of them) and them next! that is the order..... but i don't overdue putting myself first....
now continue to judge me... i don't screw every guy i see...... but i still think it is degrading to use such words towards anyone!
|
2/1/2008 9:00:16 AM |
validating ones self..... |
|
metu
Ramona, CA
age: 46
|
Ok...............Way & Grneyed........kiss & make up now!
|