| 3/5/2008 2:07:30 AM |
Do you say your sorry? |
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mindyb
Park Rapids, MN
age: 43 online now!
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When did stubborness take over? Do you you say your sorry....EVen when you dont think you have errored. What is the measure of an emotional error?
I can remember my ex hurting my feelings and me saying to him,politely of course, "that really hurt my feelings, I wish you hadn't of said that"..99% of the time he responded with no it did not!
ARe you guilty of this type of mentality?
When did "my" feelings not become my own that some else could say if they are hurt?
At what point did people loose the abilty to be sensitve and polite?
I like to think of it as thoughtfulness, is it a thing of the past?
Even if I believe myself to not have errored I am always in tune of feelings of others enough to have respect and apologize. I am not foolish enough to think "why should I have to, I did not do anything wrong." How selfish would that be.
At what point in time do you relaize that your need to humble yourself and be sorry to some one is ok to be so...just a I simple "I am sorry" Not only shows respect but it shows that you are valued in some measure. If someone tells you that you hurt them or you offended them or you made them cry any of that kind of stuff.
How do you handle yourself?
what kinds of things run through your mind?
Do you mean it?
Are you too stubborn to mean it and it is merely lip service?
a recent conversation brought up the subject of men and their stubborness...I am not certain it is a gender thing but I am assured it is a foolish thing. Your thoughts...it is a good time to pay attention to one another and observe.
To see inside the heart and mind is always a bridge worth crossing even if when we reach the final destination it might be less than we expected. And so  anyway!
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| 3/5/2008 2:12:02 AM |
Do you say your sorry? |
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onelife2live
Janesville, WI
age: 43
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Well said Mindy. Saying it and meaning it go hand in hand. Look the person in the eyes and mean it or don't say it. That's even worse, when you say "I'm sorry" and it's obvious you don't mean it. jmo
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| 3/5/2008 2:17:09 AM |
Do you say your sorry? |
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mindyb
Park Rapids, MN
age: 43 online now!
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well the question is more than that tho ...i think it would be good to see what we are all made of...for me...i dont have to mean that i errored but if someone was hurt of offende damn straight good manners is a sign of showing someone we respect. Push comes to shove i am not certain some understand value....at least with some not all
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| 3/5/2008 2:19:02 AM |
Do you say your sorry? |
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onelife2live
Janesville, WI
age: 43
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Right, common courtesy, I say sorry all the time. People close to me I mean it when I say it.
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| 3/5/2008 2:19:56 AM |
Do you say your sorry? |
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mindyb
Park Rapids, MN
age: 43 online now!
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Honestily i think its worse to not bring oneself to a place of cnviction and remorse. i think there is too much stubborn pride in the world as it is, too much vainty, too much arrogance all of it....but talking with a girlfriend about a subject brought up many old stories of my ex's behavior and with that it made me think ...what a great thread...to open up and let us see this part of one another is a good thing.
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| 3/5/2008 2:21:13 AM |
Do you say your sorry? |
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mindyb
Park Rapids, MN
age: 43 online now!
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thats good, humbleness goes a very long way.I think it has gotten lost in a shuffle somewhere.it is refreshing to see. thank you.
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| 3/5/2008 2:22:28 AM |
Do you say your sorry? |
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onelife2live
Janesville, WI
age: 43
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I'm sorry................
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| 3/5/2008 2:27:17 AM |
Do you say your sorry? |
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mindyb
Park Rapids, MN
age: 43 online now!
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I'm sorry
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| 3/5/2008 2:47:24 AM |
Do you say your sorry? |
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flowergirl62
South Australia
Australia
age: 46 online now!
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I always say sorry if I can see I was wrong.........but I don't say it just to make someone feel better.
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| 3/5/2008 2:56:33 AM |
Do you say your sorry? |
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mindyb
Park Rapids, MN
age: 43 online now!
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why not, why would you not want someone to feel healed...that does not make sense to me...i dont want someone to hurt just because I dont think i was in the wrong...I am not talking about hollow minded i am sorry like the clerk handing your burger gets off in fiveminutes and does really care that the back screwed up your order...I am talk ing about...you f*cked up because....let me say that part again...it was a mistake BECAUSE it hurt someone...your can be sorry that it hurt them. That is very healthy to posess amind that will be humbled and empathatic
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| 3/5/2008 3:21:21 AM |
Do you say your sorry? |
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ge0ge0
Tallahassee, FL
age: 41 online now!
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For me there are three steps to an apology (my kids know this well);
The 1st step: Say what I did wrong.
The 2nd step: Say why it was wrong.
The 3rd step: Apologize.
For me when I get this kind of apology, it transforms my hurt into healing so that I can concentrate on moving forward.
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| 3/5/2008 3:24:46 AM |
Do you say your sorry? |
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drumrman
Belmont, MA
age: 43 online now!
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sometimes though, even if u truly r apologetic, and extremely sorry, some ppl, well...it's still not enough. and it's 2 bad 2. freiendships, relationships, whatever, have to come to an end over mostly silly, petty, bovine scatology! when...in reality, if both sides took a step back, and a deep breathe, most of the times, whatever the issue is, can b resolved. to the benefit of both sides. JMO
but then again....what the hell do i know? 
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| 3/5/2008 3:37:23 AM |
Do you say your sorry? |
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57rickie
Sioux Falls, SD
age: 57
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Of course I do. I can be as stubborn as the next person, but I don't intentially say things to HURT someones feelings. I learned along time ago that when I am wrong I need to say I am sorry, otherwise it just eats at me if I don't. Had the recent ex say some really horrible things to me, things no MAN should ever say to a WOMAN, and he just didn't get a clue as to how badly he hurt me. Considering he was the one that was cheating in our relationship, I have to chalk it up to his GUILTY feelings coming out, had to make himself look good, like he had done no wrong. That saying Sticks & Stones has more depth then alot of people realize it does. Once words are said in anger they can not be taken back, and when they are said to intentially hurt & destroy another persons SELFWORTH it is unforgiveable. Beware the Sharp tongue, it can cut like a Knife
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| 3/5/2008 4:07:14 AM |
Do you say your sorry? |
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bellatoul
Linden, NJ
age: 44
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Very well said, I never mean to intentially hurt someone feelings or otherwise; so if I do I would not hesitate to say I am sorry. I'd rather lose my pride than someone I care about you can always get your pride back. Even if I feel I am not wrong it's worth saying I am sorry and truly meaning it.
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| 3/5/2008 4:12:07 AM |
Do you say your sorry? |
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mindyb
Park Rapids, MN
age: 43 online now!
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sometimes issues are not big ones too and I still see a lack of concern for apologetics.
And drum your right
dear God you know what my ex's favorite response was to "I'm Sorry" ...it did not matter if was our kids or at the time our littel 5 year old...A 5 YEAR OLD...The Ex said with a snip "TOO LATE!!"...I will never forget the first time I heard that come out of my little ones mouth...i explained love and is never too late mentality and you bet everytime it came out of Thoms mouth I said the little schpeel all over again...he eventaully shut up saying it around th kids.
WTF!! "Too late"...thats crazy!
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