| 4/1/2017 10:16:36 AM |
Catching Feelings or Rebounding? |
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wikdfury
Lansing, MI
33, joined Nov. 2013
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I just left a relationship and I've been in contact with an ex from over 10 years ago. This isn't my first time contacting him after a breakup but I'm finding myself catching feelings that I did not expect. I would not want to build something and then just turn around and break his heart if I'm just going through shit though. I'm usually totally single for at least a year before anything new happens but here I am snuggling up to this man again and wanting to see him again and again.
Do you rebound after breakups or stay single? Do you think it's fair to another partner to be there while you rebuild things after a breakup or should you simply say you are not available and hope to see them in the future?
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| 4/1/2017 3:45:22 PM |
Catching Feelings or Rebounding? |
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thread_killer
Stockbridge, GA
98, joined Sep. 2016
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I won't recycle previous relationships.
I prefer single life.
Dating, sex, and no bs commitments.
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| 4/1/2017 3:46:27 PM |
Catching Feelings or Rebounding? |
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stratus55
Jackson, GA
52, joined Jan. 2017
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i dated my girlfriend in mid 1970,s an a friend wanted me to move to wash. d c...i did an left her cryin in her front yard..i was a stupid 19 year old stoner..time went by,an she got married..an her hubby died from a weird disease,an i was back in tenn. the day my job ended..an i heard a voice,an it was her,an later we married an had my daughter.an later divorced as it seems to go.........this is the only time in my life i have ever done a woman totally wrong,an she was 17 i think back then....
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| 4/1/2017 3:58:17 PM |
Catching Feelings or Rebounding? |
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lovethelake17
Henderson, NV
58, joined May. 2009
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Make sure you're not just connecting with him because you're feeling down and alone and he's always been available and makes you feel good about yourself. Make sure you're not just with him because he gives you strength to go out and find someone new.
I had a man in my past who would contact me when he went through a breakup and it was really only because I made him feel better about himself. He'd be around for awhile and I'd think we were tight, and I'm certain he didn't come around just to bolster himself. I believe he thought we could make a go of it.
But it didn't work out because we really weren't right for each other and I was just his touchstone.
I don't think he used me. I think he was always sincere about it. Just like I don't think you're using this guy, but be honest with yourself, and be honest with him. Tell him you're not sure of your feelings and that you're conflicted.
Is this the first time of contacting him that you feel this way about him? If so, then it might be worth exploring but you have to let him know so that he can decide if he wants to take the chance.
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| 4/1/2017 4:03:18 PM |
Catching Feelings or Rebounding? |
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lovethelake17
Henderson, NV
58, joined May. 2009
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Oh wait. You actually asked a different question!
I think I probably have done the rebound thing, and I've done the stay single and work on myself and figure out why the relationship went wrong. When I've dated soon after a breakup, I let the guy know it hadn't been long since that breakup.
I'm not always sure that staying single for a time precludes that the next relationship won't be a rebound, but they can be fun in any case.
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| 4/1/2017 7:28:21 PM |
Catching Feelings or Rebounding? |
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packersbabe920
Green Bay, WI
52, joined Jul. 2013
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Stay single for awhile, before getting with someone else
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| 4/1/2017 7:39:56 PM |
Catching Feelings or Rebounding? |
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cherisays
Amden
Switzerland
20, joined Dec. 2014
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Some b*tches need a d*ck no matter where it is from..get respect for yourself!
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| 4/1/2017 7:44:55 PM |
Catching Feelings or Rebounding? |
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OrchideaPorpora
BadraoMilan
Italy
44, joined Feb. 2017
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No rebound for me. It doesn't work so I prefer to stay single, for as long as I need.
I like it that way and it works for me.
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| 4/1/2017 7:56:35 PM |
Catching Feelings or Rebounding? |
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testsignup
Springfield, VA
64, joined Sep. 2009
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(this post has been flagged as inappropriate, sorry.)
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| 4/1/2017 7:59:03 PM |
Catching Feelings or Rebounding? |
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enigmaathand
Leavittsburg, OH
37, joined Mar. 2013
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Being from Michigan, I know you will understand this metaphor
"When you travel down the same old roads, the same potholes are still there."
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| 4/1/2017 8:01:58 PM |
Catching Feelings or Rebounding? |
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stratus55
Jackson, GA
52, joined Jan. 2017
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i get it,but you wouldnt wanna be on hiway 81 now,as there repaving in the lights..
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| 4/1/2017 8:03:53 PM |
Catching Feelings or Rebounding? |
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enigmaathand
Leavittsburg, OH
37, joined Mar. 2013
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Well, being from Georgia, I know you will understand this one, Stratus:
"Trump fans want to build a wall, but I-75 has been under construction since I was born."
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| 4/1/2017 10:37:49 PM |
Catching Feelings or Rebounding? |
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driver406
Saint Paul, MN
65, joined Oct. 2009
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Only a GIRL keeps going back to a stupid EX. And he is stupid to take up AGAIN with some GIRL who has already dumped him numerous times. Both you KIDS need to GROW UP until you are truly ready for an adult relationship. You may be 31, OPie, but you're acting 14.
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| 4/2/2017 1:42:07 AM |
Catching Feelings or Rebounding? |
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cavie59
Enid, OK
58, joined Feb. 2010
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1.Do you rebound after breakups or stay single?
2.Do you think it's fair to another partner to be there while you rebuild things after a breakup?
3.Should you simply say you are not available and hope to see them in the future?
1. I normally stay single for years after a breakup.
2.It is never fair to the other person when you use them as a "Rebound" hookup.
3.Tell them what is going on, and let them decide.
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| 4/2/2017 1:44:44 AM |
Catching Feelings or Rebounding? |
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stratus55
Jackson, GA
52, joined Jan. 2017
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since my wife died in 2013,and before i met her all my life..dates have been good,i dont ask or beg,but we go eat,an slow dance,good food an musick..but there all so short,but i was like 6,,2 at 17 years old,an still they were my friends,i was shy,but that disappeared a good many years ago.........to be there friend,an put them first maybe is key..
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| 4/2/2017 3:37:55 AM |
Catching Feelings or Rebounding? |
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_HarleyQuinn
County Antrim, N. Ireland
United Kingdom
39, joined Sep. 2016
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Rebound ..with new but have no intentions on keeping..... its whats called a bit of rough 
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| 4/2/2017 7:30:44 AM |
Catching Feelings or Rebounding? |
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Mercedes_3
New South Wales
Australia
90, joined Jun. 2016
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The rebound thing is unfair on them.
I wouldn't want to be a rebound.
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| 4/2/2017 9:35:10 PM |
Catching Feelings or Rebounding? |
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wikdfury
Lansing, MI
33, joined Nov. 2013
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Make sure you're not just connecting with him because you're feeling down and alone and he's always been available and makes you feel good about yourself. Make sure you're not just with him because he gives you strength to go out and find someone new.
I had a man in my past who would contact me when he went through a breakup and it was really only because I made him feel better about himself. He'd be around for awhile and I'd think we were tight, and I'm certain he didn't come around just to bolster himself. I believe he thought we could make a go of it.
But it didn't work out because we really weren't right for each other and I was just his touchstone.
I don't think he used me. I think he was always sincere about it. Just like I don't think you're using this guy, but be honest with yourself, and be honest with him. Tell him you're not sure of your feelings and that you're conflicted.
Is this the first time of contacting him that you feel this way about him? If so, then it might be worth exploring but you have to let him know so that he can decide if he wants to take the chance.
This is the first time I've caught feelings. In the past I just wanted him to come make me feel good again and was still struggling with emotions about the breakup. This breakup I was beyond ready for it to be over and just so happy and already over it. He's also doing so well now and it's really impressive. I am doing a lot of comparing with him about things I'd hated with the ex and coping with that he does not have and I think that's increasing my feelings.
He does know that I'm going through a breakup again and if anything we are having a fling. He seems okay with whatever but I think he's also really optimistic.
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| 4/2/2017 10:26:30 PM |
Catching Feelings or Rebounding? |
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stratus55
Jackson, GA
52, joined Jan. 2017
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i want one person for life,an lots in common like i had..i had good dates but i feel bad about even dating two or so in a week or two period,im emotional,an passionate
and fall for certain ones pretty easy.
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| 4/3/2017 3:20:31 AM |
Catching Feelings or Rebounding? |
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sadlsticsienna
New South Wales
Australia
25, joined Jan. 2016
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Do you rebound after breakups or stay single? Do you think it's fair to another partner to be there while you rebuild things after a breakup or should you simply say you are not available and hope to see them in the future?
When I really care about them it's hard to move on.
I don't rebound, like I may talk to guys but that's really as far as it gets cos I'm still dealing with the loss of my bf.
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| 4/3/2017 2:26:58 PM |
Catching Feelings or Rebounding? |
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lovethelake17
Henderson, NV
58, joined May. 2009
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This is the first time I've caught feelings. In the past I just wanted him to come make me feel good again and was still struggling with emotions about the breakup. This breakup I was beyond ready for it to be over and just so happy and already over it. He's also doing so well now and it's really impressive. I am doing a lot of comparing with him about things I'd hated with the ex and coping with that he does not have and I think that's increasing my feelings.
He does know that I'm going through a breakup again and if anything we are having a fling. He seems okay with whatever but I think he's also really optimistic.
As long as he knows and you continue being honest about your emotions, it's up to him to decide to continue with you. I don't think you can be responsible for his emotions and yours and/or make any decisions for him about being in the relationship. He should know the score, especially since you've looked him up after other breakups. It's his decision, too, if he wants to continue seeing you.
However, I'd be watching how optimistic he gets about it, especially if you start to think that your first feelings about being with him again aren't real.
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| 4/3/2017 5:16:07 PM |
Catching Feelings or Rebounding? |
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thebigugly0
Kent, OH
46, joined Sep. 2012
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Some need to just cut out the middle man and start standing on street corners.
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| 4/3/2017 6:06:50 PM |
Catching Feelings or Rebounding? |
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enigmaathand
Leavittsburg, OH
37, joined Mar. 2013
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As long as he knows and you continue being honest about your emotions, it's up to him to decide to continue with you. I don't think you can be responsible for his emotions and yours and/or make any decisions for him about being in the relationship. He should know the score, especially since you've looked him up after other breakups. It's his decision, too, if he wants to continue seeing you.
However, I'd be watching how optimistic he gets about it, especially if you start to think that your first feelings about being with him again aren't real.
She is a WOMAN, so the honesty certainly won't last forever, and it is quite entertainingly ironic to see it happen this way to the OP.
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| 4/6/2017 5:01:36 AM |
Catching Feelings or Rebounding? |
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sadlsticsienna
New South Wales
Australia
25, joined Jan. 2016
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So what happened Op, updates?
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| 4/6/2017 8:02:40 PM |
Catching Feelings or Rebounding? |
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enigmaathand
Leavittsburg, OH
37, joined Mar. 2013
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So what happened Op, updates?
She got her own negative karma back in her own face, for all the games she has previously played on the various men she was involved with, and I am laughing my a** off about it.
I love watching Karma kick the shit out of some female, because she will STILL DENY how she ever did anything wrong, and expect everyone to feel sympathy for her.
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| 4/6/2017 11:37:01 PM |
Catching Feelings or Rebounding? |
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sadlsticsienna
New South Wales
Australia
25, joined Jan. 2016
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How exactly
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| 4/7/2017 12:51:09 AM |
Catching Feelings or Rebounding? |
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wikdfury
Lansing, MI
33, joined Nov. 2013
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So what happened Op, updates?
We talked and we are doing this. He's on his way here from work and already has a toothbrush and deodorant here lol. I found some of his things in my laundry today also. We both work so much that this just works and we get to catch up a little each night and then we spend most of our work days on Snapchat. Turns out he's grown up a lot and is quite the catch and same here.
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| 4/7/2017 1:07:24 AM |
Catching Feelings or Rebounding? |
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sadlsticsienna
New South Wales
Australia
25, joined Jan. 2016
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Oh wow awesome best of luck 
I have known my ex for 8 years but was with him for 6. He is coming over tomorrow to help me with my citrus plants lol
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| 4/7/2017 2:15:13 AM |
Catching Feelings or Rebounding? |
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stratus55
Jackson, GA
52, joined Jan. 2017
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tread lightly,an proceed carefully......
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