Hitting The Funny None

3/25/2015 8:46:38 AM	Hitting The Funny None
id_dapperdon Boise, ID 77, joined Sep. 2014	This thread is for laughs. They can be anything you think is funny and feel others will also. Meet singles at DateHookup.dating, we're 100% free! Join now!
3/25/2015 8:56:34 AM	Hitting The Funny None
cupocheer Assumption, IL 68, joined May. 2010	.............................................. ...............................................
3/25/2015 8:57:34 AM	Hitting The Funny None
laffwimme Bent Mountain, VA 66, joined Jul. 2012	Twisted sisters?
3/25/2015 9:02:33 AM	Hitting The Funny None
cupocheer Assumption, IL 68, joined May. 2010	.............................................
3/25/2015 9:09:29 AM	Hitting The Funny None
cowboy4672 Lillian, AL 70, joined Dec. 2012	Hickory d*ckory dock Three mice ran up the clock The Clock struck "One" The other two escaped with minor injuries!!!!!
3/25/2015 9:14:24 AM	Hitting The Funny None
cowboy4672 Lillian, AL 70, joined Dec. 2012	What can a rooster do that a man can not?????
3/25/2015 9:53:02 AM	Hitting The Funny None
cowboy4672 Lillian, AL 70, joined Dec. 2012	Quote from cowboy4672: What can a rooster do that a man can not????? Pick up corn with his Pecker!!
3/25/2015 9:58:40 AM	Hitting The Funny None
morles San Antonio, TX 73, joined Nov. 2007	That is what we need is another Joke Thread..
3/25/2015 11:01:47 AM	Hitting The Funny None
cupocheer Assumption, IL 68, joined May. 2010	Quote from cowboy4672: What can a rooster do that a man can not????? C*ckle--doodle--doo without being labeled as gay.
3/25/2015 8:15:53 PM	Hitting The Funny None
cowboy4672 Lillian, AL 70, joined Dec. 2012	What did one bed bug say to the other bedbug????? See you in the Spring!!!
3/25/2015 9:34:35 PM	Hitting The Funny None
laffwimme Bent Mountain, VA 66, joined Jul. 2012	Keep your day job Cowboy........
3/25/2015 10:27:51 PM	Hitting The Funny None
cupocheer Assumption, IL 68, joined May. 2010	sheesh .... I took an IQ test; it was negative.
3/26/2015 5:03:15 AM	Hitting The Funny None
aladytoo Monroe, WI 61, joined Apr. 2006	Whats the differance between and Irish wedding and funeral? one less drunk.......Not picking on Irish, thats how the joke was told
3/26/2015 5:16:18 AM	Hitting The Funny None
aladytoo Monroe, WI 61, joined Apr. 2006	long joke(warning) Older man was sitting in food court at mall watch people. Was staring at this young man for hours on his lap top with multi colored mohawk hair. Seemed it bother the young man,but he said nothing. Older man was back the next day, again saw the kid with the multi colored mohawk and went to sit near him,to get a better look. After a few hr's the kid went over and said "why are you staring at me?".The older man said I was wondering if I should know you? The kid said "why should you?". The older man said well I have a confession... and looked up at the kid. He said about 20 yrs ago,was sort of drunk and found a peacck roaming in the country loose. was a bit needy and well I screwed the peacck.... I was just wondering if your my son with that hair.
3/26/2015 9:42:28 AM	Hitting The Funny None
cowboy4672 Lillian, AL 70, joined Dec. 2012	Old Soldier story: Scene, Army camp in the desert: Old Sarge gets assigned and sets up his tent. A month goes by and sarge notices No Women. After another month, sarge is getting a little..(You Know) so he asks one of the Privates. What do you guys do for "Female Entertainment?" The private takes him around the back of the Motorpool and points to a camel!! Sarge shakes his head and says "NO>>>NEVER>>NO" Couple more months go by............................ About 4 in the morning a loud ruckus is heard from out back of the Motor Pool... Everybody comes a running...... There's Sarge on top of a step ladder........... The Private looks up in disgust and says Sarge...We just usually ride her in to town!!!!!!
3/27/2015 5:47:07 AM	Hitting The Funny None
aladytoo Monroe, WI 61, joined Apr. 2006	Come on this threads not that bad.
3/27/2015 5:50:36 AM	Hitting The Funny None
LetsSee0654 Sebastian, FL 63, joined Sep. 2014	Ha Ha ?
3/27/2015 8:33:48 AM	Hitting The Funny None
id_dapperdon Boise, ID 77, joined Sep. 2014	I didn't think it was bad either .. that is .. until that military camel joke Geesh lol
3/27/2015 8:57:48 AM	Hitting The Funny None
cowboy4672 Lillian, AL 70, joined Dec. 2012	What' not funny about going to town, Okay somewhere between third and sixth grade humor. How do you know there's an elephant in the fridge?? Footprints in the strawberry cheesecake!!!
3/28/2015 8:45:27 PM	Hitting The Funny None
cupocheer Assumption, IL 68, joined May. 2010	Duh! How do you know there's an elephant in the house? There is a tricycle parked in the driveway.
3/28/2015 9:12:48 PM	Hitting The Funny None
cowboy4672 Lillian, AL 70, joined Dec. 2012	Why do Elephants have wrinkled Knees?? Playing Marbles!!!
3/29/2015 6:15:44 AM	Hitting The Funny None
aladytoo Monroe, WI 61, joined Apr. 2006	Why do blackbirds sit in the middle of street? They are practicing to become ladybirds of the evening saying Cheep Cheep Cheep.
3/29/2015 10:24:18 AM	Hitting The Funny None
cowboy4672 Lillian, AL 70, joined Dec. 2012	Why do ducks have flat webbed feet?? Stomping out forest fires!!! Why do elephants have great big round flat feet?? Stomping out Flaming Ducks!!!
3/30/2015 7:14:54 AM	Hitting The Funny None
cupocheer Assumption, IL 68, joined May. 2010	How do you verify a conspiracy theory? Ask Humpty Dumpty.
4/2/2015 9:24:52 PM	Hitting The Funny None
cupocheer Assumption, IL 68, joined May. 2010	I was in a car showroom today and the salesman asked, "What are you looking for?"
5/5/2015 6:53:02 PM	Hitting The Funny None
id_dapperdon Boise, ID 77, joined Sep. 2014	Here are the new password rules LOL
5/7/2015 11:15:16 AM	Hitting The Funny None
id_dapperdon Boise, ID 77, joined Sep. 2014	I think something was missed in translation. The title of the thread is " Hitting the Funny None" No this was not a typo the posts were supposed to be groaners not hahas .
5/11/2015 5:08:31 PM	Hitting The Funny None
sankie1 Irvine, KY 69, joined Dec. 2011	Whine, moan, gripe, and complain. Now that's hitting the "funny none". Just saw on the news that a family of 10 children were removed from a home because the parents chose to live off the grid. Their house was not the traditional style and they have no running water or utilities. Pictures of the children look like they are well cared for. The house is neat even if not the traditional model. Looked like a beginning structure with lean to additions added on as well as a tent room serving as the front or living room. When did it become law to have running water and electric in the house where there are children?
5/18/2015 12:17:36 PM	Hitting The Funny None
id_dapperdon Boise, ID 77, joined Sep. 2014	How Many Christians Does It Take to Change a Light Bulb? Charismatic: Only 1 - Hands are already in the air. Pentecostal: 10 - One to change the bulb, and nine to pray against the spirit of darkness. Presbyterians: None - Lights will go on and off at predestined times. Roman Catholic: None - Candles only. (Of guaranteed origin of course.) Baptists: At least 15 - One to change the light bulb, and three committees to approve the change and decide who brings the potato salad and fried chicken. Episcopalians: 3 - One to call the electrician, one to mix the drinks, and one to talk about how much better the old one was. Mormons: 5 - One man to change the bulb, and four wives to tell him how to do it. Unitarians: We choose not to make a statement either in favor of or against the need for a light bulb. However, if in your own journey you have found that light bulbs work for you, you are invited to write a poem or compose a modern dance about your light bulb for the next Sunday service, in which we will explore a number of light bulb traditions, including incandescent, fluorescent, 3-way, long-life and tinted, all of which are equally valid paths to luminescence. Methodists: Undetermined - Whether your light is bright, dull, or completely out, you are loved. You can be a light bulb, turnip bulb, or tulip bulb. Bring a bulb of your choice to the Sunday lighting service and a covered dish to pass. Nazarene: 6 - One woman to replace the bulb while five men review church lighting policy. Lutherans: None - Lutherans don't believe in change. Amish: What’s a light bulb? Read more at http://www.beliefnet.com/Entertainment/Joke-of-the-Day/Daily-Joke.aspx#wuyEjXHCdQwLWxoB.99
6/17/2015 2:45:47 PM	Hitting The Funny None
maggievalleymtn North Myrtle Beach, SC 65, joined Jun. 2013
6/17/2015 3:21:55 PM	Hitting The Funny None
maggievalleymtn North Myrtle Beach, SC 65, joined Jun. 2013
6/17/2015 5:49:04 PM	Hitting The Funny None
shaggyoledog Ocean Shores, WA 69, joined Apr. 2011	Shux! This'n gots lots more thread left... We're good fer a nuther couple hundred thousan' miles... There once was a hoe called skanky Who blue her boogers on ta a hanky It wooden stop runnin' She thot she was cunnin' But we new 'twas dain bramage frankly
6/17/2015 5:53:39 PM	Hitting The Funny None
maggievalleymtn North Myrtle Beach, SC 65, joined Jun. 2013	Why...this can serve as a poets thread as well....
6/17/2015 5:59:20 PM	Hitting The Funny None
shaggyoledog Ocean Shores, WA 69, joined Apr. 2011	Who knew... limericks R pomes??? I'll bet thet canna soup knew. Any one thet's bin on SS disability fer over 15 years, has way too much time on there hands and googles a lot... right? snort, g'faw, chortle,
6/18/2015 4:21:33 PM	Hitting The Funny None
maggievalleymtn North Myrtle Beach, SC 65, joined Jun. 2013	Thu, Jun 18th, 2015 An Outraged And Disgusted Bernie Sanders Urges His Supporters To Donate To Emanuel AME Church By: Jason Easley Democratic presidential candidate Bernie Sanders has canceled his scheduled campaign event in Charleston, SC this weekend and is urging his supporters to donate to the Emanuel AME Church. In a statement, Sanders said, “The Charleston church killings are a tragic reminder of the ugly stain of racism that still taints our nation. This senseless violence fills me with outrage, disgust and a deep, deep sadness. The hateful killing of nine people praying inside a church is a horrific reminder that, while we have made significant progress in advancing civil rights in this country, we are far from eradicating racism. Our thoughts and prayers are with the families and their congregation.” Sanders also urged his supporters to donate to the Emanuel AME Church, which you can do here. Sen. Sanders has over 200,000 donors, so if every donor would give the church one dollar that would mean more than $200,000 to help them in their time of grief. The Sanders event has been postponed as now is not the time for presidential campaign politics. It is important that our nation take this time to grieve and heal, but to also ask why, and how we can take steps towards ridding ourselves of the dark cloud of racism that still hovers over our nation and society. There will be time later for campaign rallies. The three emotions that that Senator described feeling disgust, outrage, and sadness are shared by most Americans today. There is an overwhelming sadness over the loss of innocent life. Disgust over the racist motivations behind the crime, and outrage over the act itself. We all must come together to stand against racism, and reject the hate that fueled this monstrous crime.
6/18/2015 5:09:01 PM	Hitting The Funny None
morles San Antonio, TX 73, joined Nov. 2007	I am surprise there hasn't more and there probably will be more Hate Crimes in the Future. You can only ask Why??? ........Maybe Barrack Obama and his Amazon Wife Michelle giving Race Baiting Speeches .. ............Maybe not to forget Al Sharptongue.. Jesse Jackass.. and Erick Holder the Racist ????????????????????? ................Congratulations to all the LIBERAL aforementioned for turning Racism back 50 years......
6/18/2015 5:12:56 PM	Hitting The Funny None
back4alook Lima, OH 64, joined Nov. 2012	I was thinking something like this about a month ago. Reminds me of the 60's.
6/18/2015 5:55:27 PM	Hitting The Funny None
maggievalleymtn North Myrtle Beach, SC 65, joined Jun. 2013	Quote from morles: I am surprise there hasn't more and there probably will be more Hate Crimes in the Future. You can only ask Why??? ........Maybe Barrack Obama and his Amazon Wife Michelle giving Race Baiting Speeches .. ............Maybe not to forget Al Sharptongue.. Jesse Jackass.. and Erick Holder the Racist ????????????????????? ................Congratulations to all the LIBERAL aforementioned for turning Racism back 50 years...... I think you are the pure Devil. You have no respect for the dead or their families. I am praying for them all including the murderer and his family. Please quit following me around. Your demonic hatred is disgusting.
6/18/2015 5:59:16 PM	Hitting The Funny None
joysmiles Jacksonville, NC 64, joined Oct. 2012	Moris every thing you said I have to agree with you
6/19/2015 11:12:16 AM	Hitting The Funny None
maggievalleymtn North Myrtle Beach, SC 65, joined Jun. 2013	Well, of course you do Joy...you basically told Clarity the same thing about all of her posts and Morlies and Clarity are two peas in a pod, right?
6/19/2015 11:37:23 AM	Hitting The Funny None
morles San Antonio, TX 73, joined Nov. 2007	Quote from maggievalleymtn: I think you are the pure Devil. You have no respect for the dead or their families. I am praying for them all including the murderer and his family. Please quit following me around. Your demonic hatred is disgusting. The Families of the victims have all my condolences for such a Senseless Tragic Event.. By the way Magit.. who you praying to..??? ......There is no kind of God or Supreme being that would recognize you..
6/19/2015 1:01:14 PM	Hitting The Funny None
oh_lydia Upton, MA 70, joined May. 2013	Obama has had no reason to do any race baiting... "Just the image of his dark complexion sitting in that chair, and the even darker complexion of his wife standing next to him as the nation’s First Lady, has stirred up a hornet’s nest of fanatical hatred and bitterness that has only grown more intense with each passing year he has spent serving this nation as Commander-in-Chief." As written for Politicus... Charleston Needs More, Mr. President was written by Black Liberal Boomer for PoliticusUSA. © PoliticusUSA, Thu, Jun 18th, 2015 — All Rights Reserved All that hatred was beneath the surface while white supremacist silently kept the African/American population "in it's place" ...... until 2008 when their heads began to explode I feel sorry for their intolerance...it must eat away at them
6/19/2015 1:08:00 PM	Hitting The Funny None
maggievalleymtn North Myrtle Beach, SC 65, joined Jun. 2013	MorliesClarity...why do you follow me around like a desperate hound dog? Your other crazy half, Clarity, is keeping your boring political thread alive...shouldn't you be helping her spill hate over there rather than stalking me? It might draw more haters to your thread. MorliesClar
6/19/2015 1:49:20 PM	Hitting The Funny None
maggievalleymtn North Myrtle Beach, SC 65, joined Jun. 2013	Quote from oh_lydia: Obama has had no reason to do any race baiting... "Just the image of his dark complexion sitting in that chair, and the even darker complexion of his wife standing next to him as the nation’s First Lady, has stirred up a hornet’s nest of fanatical hatred and bitterness that has only grown more intense with each passing year he has spent serving this nation as Commander-in-Chief." As written for Politicus... Charleston Needs More, Mr. President was written by Black Liberal Boomer for PoliticusUSA. © PoliticusUSA, Thu, Jun 18th, 2015 — All Rights Reserved All that hatred was beneath the surface while white supremacist silently kept the African/American population "in it's place" ...... until 2008 when their heads began to explode I feel sorry for their intolerance...it must eat away at them
6/19/2015 1:56:46 PM	Hitting The Funny None
electricsparkie Warwick, RI 76, joined Aug. 2014	Morales I have a question, maybe more. When they find hin illegal to be president because he was not a citizen will they make him pay back the money he received as a paycheck and the benefits (all the vacations, etc.)? How about the laws he signed. What becomes of them?
6/19/2015 2:36:49 PM	Hitting The Funny None
maggievalleymtn North Myrtle Beach, SC 65, joined Jun. 2013	(this post has been flagged as inappropriate, sorry.)
6/19/2015 5:30:14 PM	Hitting The Funny None
morles San Antonio, TX 73, joined Nov. 2007	Quote from electricsparkie: Morales I have a question, maybe more. When they find hin illegal to be president because he was not a citizen will they make him pay back the money he received as a paycheck and the benefits (all the vacations, etc.)? How about the laws he signed. What becomes of them? Sparkie unfortunately more than likely nothing will change when the TRUTH comes out because of the ignorant s of the Democrats who can't see beyond the end of their noses and the ones who haven't got their heads of the Sands about this Fraud in the White House. He was elected because of his deceiving Lies how he was going to make changes to the better well he made changes alright and it sure and heck is not to the better.. Check the Statistics they pretty well tell the Story..
6/20/2015 5:57:57 AM	Hitting The Funny None
maggievalleymtn North Myrtle Beach, SC 65, joined Jun. 2013
6/20/2015 8:06:55 AM	Hitting The Funny None
laffwimme Bent Mountain, VA 66, joined Jul. 2012	Quote from id_dapperdon: This thread is for laughs. They can be anything you think is funny and feel others will also. This thread is for laughs..........and politics aren't all that funny.
6/20/2015 8:51:41 AM	Hitting The Funny None
sankie1 Irvine, KY 69, joined Dec. 2011	Another place for the single minded to hold hostage. What's so hard to understand about "if it's your thing and/or opinion OK", but do you have to swamp everyone else with it? Sounds like Cup all over again with another band wagon to get on.
6/20/2015 8:57:35 AM	Hitting The Funny None
maggievalleymtn North Myrtle Beach, SC 65, joined Jun. 2013	Sorry Laff, but no one had posted on this thread in over a month when I first posted here a few days ago, and the OP HAS DELETED...the first thing I checked. This thread was on its way to the DH graveyard. Please feel free to post all the jokes you wish here as it is no one's thread.
6/20/2015 9:01:36 AM	Hitting The Funny None
shaggyoledog Ocean Shores, WA 69, joined Apr. 2011	There once was an old lady too sour Whom everyone knew didn't shower She was rancid an skankie An as LARGE as a tankie An too stinky ta role in the flower
6/20/2015 9:14:19 AM	Hitting The Funny None
laffwimme Bent Mountain, VA 66, joined Jul. 2012	Quote from maggievalleymtn: Sorry Laff, but no one had posted on this thread in over a month when I first posted here a few days ago, and the OP HAS DELETED...the first thing I checked. This thread was on its way to the DH graveyard. Please feel free to post all the jokes you wish here as it is no one's thread. I just hate politics and the rhetoric/spin thereof. If folks that are into politics would confine their political views to political threads only that would be sweet. Those of us that aren't into that chit could (and would) avoid those threads. While each side has some interesting and possibly vaild points, much of it is BS and unfounded. Plus, spreading it around ruins other threads.
6/20/2015 9:23:52 AM	Hitting The Funny None
maggievalleymtn North Myrtle Beach, SC 65, joined Jun. 2013	Quote from sankie1: Another place for the single minded to hold hostage. What's so hard to understand about "if it's your thing and/or opinion OK", but do you have to swamp everyone else with it? Sounds like Cup all over again with another band wagon to get on. Stankie, there are at least 50 active threads in the 60s Group...surely you have enough sense to read and participate in the ones you enjoy and avoid the ones you don't! I have enough sense to avoid your negative thread "What Did You Not Like About Today" and "Old Laws on the Books" that bombed. Now this is the 2nd or 3rd time trying to tell me how to post...you even chased me to the 50s group once...I will tell you one more time...skip posts you don't like and move on, Fool.
6/20/2015 9:30:26 AM	Hitting The Funny None
maggievalleymtn North Myrtle Beach, SC 65, joined Jun. 2013	Quote from laffwimme: I just hate politics and the rhetoric/spin thereof. If folks that are into politics would confine their political views to political threads only that would be sweet. Those of us that aren't into that chit could (and would) avoid those threads. While each side has some interesting and possibly vaild points, much of it is BS and unfounded. Plus, spreading it around ruins other threads. So now you know I will be posting political thoughts on this thread (that had just about expired), Avoid it maybe? The same OP (who deleted his profile) has another thread "Standing Around The Water Cooler" that is about to expire. Maybe it can be revived with jokes.
6/20/2015 9:33:03 AM	Hitting The Funny None
maggievalleymtn North Myrtle Beach, SC 65, joined Jun. 2013	Quote from shaggyoledog: There once was an old lady too sour Whom everyone knew didn't shower She was rancid an skankie An as LARGE as a tankie An too stinky ta role in the flower That's what I call "hitting the funny none"
6/20/2015 9:36:54 AM	Hitting The Funny None
shaggyoledog Ocean Shores, WA 69, joined Apr. 2011	Quote from laffwimme: I just hate politics and the rhetoric/spin thereof. If folks that are into politics would confine their political views to political threads only that would be sweet. Those of us that aren't into that chit could (and would) avoid those threads. While each side has some interesting and possibly vaild points, much of it is BS and unfounded. Plus, spreading it around ruins other threads. Sounds like someone needs a enema... Dumm azz control freak. Bendover... skankie will make it all better...
6/20/2015 10:04:44 AM	Hitting The Funny None
morles San Antonio, TX 73, joined Nov. 2007	Quote from maggievalleymtn: So now you know I will be posting political thoughts on this thread (that had just about expired), Avoid it maybe? The same OP (who deleted his profile) has another thread "Standing Around The Water Cooler" that is about to expire. Maybe it can be revived with jokes. One hundred twenty-one convicted criminals who faced deportation orders between 2010 and 2014 were never removed from the country and now face murder charges, according to Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE). Just to be clear, these were convicted criminals, in ICE custody, who had been ordered deported but were instead released back into U.S. communities, and then went on to murder Americans. Most were released simply because the administration didn’t want to detain them. Only for two dozen does the administration have any excuse at all, saying that they had to be released because their home countries wouldn’t take them back. And even that’s no excuse, for two reasons: the Supreme Court decision Obama’s people point to (Zadvydas v. Davis) limiting open-ended detention beyond six months of any criminal aliens whose countries won’t take them back has significant wiggle room in it – wiggle room the administration refuses, in this one and only instance, to take advantage of. And second, the law requires the State Department to impose visa sanctions on countries that won’t take their own citizens back, a requirement Secretaries Clinton and Kerry have simply ignored.
6/21/2015 11:04:32 AM	Hitting The Funny None
maggievalleymtn North Myrtle Beach, SC 65, joined Jun. 2013	Morlies, why would you quote me when: 1. My quote was not addressing you 2. And your response has absolutely zero to do with my quote? Do you want my approval of your nutty posts, or are you still stalking me? I never post something political and call YOUR foolish attention to it. Grow up...post something and let it be. I WILL THIS ONE TIME ADDRESS YOUR FOX MESS: None of us are happy about the criminal emigrants who are released by Bush and Obama as we are not happy about the judges who release the U.S. Criminal citizens. It is very complicated and you might want to read about it rather than rely on Clarity who relies on Fox Not News. Please take note of the graph below and look at the bottom number of criminals. Obama has deported overall1.5 times more illegal people than Bush did so far. No telling what an up to date graph will look like! You surely won't see it on your pleather recliner in front of Fox Not News. Now, I urge you to concern yourself more with the thousands of U.S. soldiers killed in Bush illegal war which only benefited corporations opposed to the 150 criminals who were released. Look at the big picture...if Bush wins, we are right back into an illegal war only benefiting corporations. Turn off Fox and get out of your pleather recliner. Excuse errors...hard to edit on small phone
6/21/2015 11:09:59 AM	Hitting The Funny None
maggievalleymtn North Myrtle Beach, SC 65, joined Jun. 2013	Opps...this was the graph I meant to post above, but that is a good meme.

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