12/20/2015 4:53:37 PM |
PURP"S comedy club | Page 2 |
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kennylooking4u
Victorville, CA
59, joined Dec. 2010
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There once was five year old boy who enjoyed playing with his train set. One afternoon, his mother happened to be standing by the door listening to the boy play. She was shocked when she heard him saying,
"All right, all of you son of a b*tches who want to get on the train, get on train. And all of you son of a b*tches who want to get off the train, get off the train. And all of you son of a b*tches who want to change seats, change seats now 'cause the train's getting ready to leave. Whoo whooooo."
The mother was just devastated, so she scolded her son and said to him,
"Now son, I want to go upstairs and take your nap, and when you get up, you can't play with your train set for two hours."
So the boy took his nap and didn't even mention his train set for two hours. After the two hours were up, the boy asked his mom if he could play with his train set again. She said yes, and asked him if he understood why he was punished. He nodded his head yes, and off he went. The mother stood by door to listen to what her son would say. The boy sat down to his train set and calmly said,
"Whoo whoooooo. All of you ladies and gentlemen who want to get on the train, get on the train. All of you ladies and gentlemen who want to get off the train, get off the train. And all you son of a b*tches who are pissed 'cause the train is two hours late, go talk to the b*tch in the kitchen.
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12/20/2015 11:01:56 PM |
PURP"S comedy club | Page 2 |
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purplesky56
Pearcy, AR
63, joined Nov. 2010
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it has been very quite on the home front..
sad news to report Rudolph's nose went out
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12/21/2015 2:50:44 AM |
PURP"S comedy club | Page 2 |
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mrroscoereturns
Ochopee, FL
59, joined Oct. 2015
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What happens when you deep fry Santa Claus..?
You get...
kris Kringle!
[Edited 12/21/2015 2:51:24 AM ]
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12/21/2015 6:02:13 PM |
PURP"S comedy club | Page 2 |
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packersbabe920
Green Bay, WI
52, joined Jul. 2013
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::laughing
[Edited 12/21/2015 6:02:40 PM ]
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12/22/2015 5:43:11 AM |
PURP"S comedy club | Page 2 |
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purplesky56
Pearcy, AR
63, joined Nov. 2010
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krisp elf also if you fry 1 but you might fry
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12/22/2015 10:19:58 AM |
PURP"S comedy club | Page 2 |
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kennylooking4u
Victorville, CA
59, joined Dec. 2010
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12/22/2015 5:17:38 PM |
PURP"S comedy club | Page 2 |
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packersbabe920
Green Bay, WI
52, joined Jul. 2013
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add me to the naughty list
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12/22/2015 5:26:14 PM |
PURP"S comedy club | Page 2 |
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mrroscoereturns
Ochopee, FL
59, joined Oct. 2015
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Jingle bells
Batman smells
Robin laid an egg
Batmobile, broke it's wheel..
Joker got away..
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12/23/2015 4:15:57 AM |
PURP"S comedy club | Page 2 |
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purplesky56
Pearcy, AR
63, joined Nov. 2010
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sometimes you can only be good for 1 day.
im still laughing about krispy kringle.
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12/23/2015 10:46:16 AM |
PURP"S comedy club | Page 2 |
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stareye1
Osage Beach, MO
58, joined Sep. 2009
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12/23/2015 11:36:11 AM |
PURP"S comedy club | Page 2 |
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lynyrd80
Wood River, NE
56, joined Jan. 2014
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A little girl asked a boy "are you the opposite sex, or am I?"
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12/23/2015 12:05:21 PM |
PURP"S comedy club | Page 2 |
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baconbgood4u
Leesburg, FL
72, joined Jun. 2014
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Adolf the brown nose raindeer brakes went out he b behind ruddy.
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12/23/2015 6:09:52 PM |
PURP"S comedy club | Page 2 |
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packersbabe920
Green Bay, WI
52, joined Jul. 2013
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12/23/2015 9:03:39 PM |
PURP"S comedy club | Page 2 |
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purplesky56
Pearcy, AR
63, joined Nov. 2010
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omg I am now visually impaired.. because of santa,,
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12/24/2015 11:56:55 AM |
PURP"S comedy club | Page 2 |
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stareye1
Osage Beach, MO
58, joined Sep. 2009
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12/24/2015 5:06:02 PM |
PURP"S comedy club | Page 2 |
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packersbabe920
Green Bay, WI
52, joined Jul. 2013
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purple I kinda feel the same way
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12/24/2015 11:49:01 PM |
PURP"S comedy club | Page 2 |
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purplesky56
Pearcy, AR
63, joined Nov. 2010
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I know who thought that up
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12/26/2015 11:01:58 AM |
PURP"S comedy club | Page 2 |
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kennylooking4u
Victorville, CA
59, joined Dec. 2010
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12/26/2015 6:12:14 PM |
PURP"S comedy club | Page 2 |
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packersbabe920
Green Bay, WI
52, joined Jul. 2013
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Hope Everyone enjoyed there Christmas
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12/26/2015 6:22:20 PM |
PURP"S comedy club | Page 2 |
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purplesky56
Pearcy, AR
63, joined Nov. 2010
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that is funny the jokes on her ..thanks for posting...how about champagne?
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12/27/2015 4:49:01 PM |
PURP"S comedy club | Page 2 |
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sorpstar
Little River, SC
65, joined Oct. 2009
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Mahatma Gandhi, as you know, walked barefoot most of the time, which produced an impressive set of calluses on his feet.
He also ate very little, which made him rather frail and, with his odd diet, he suffered from bad breath….
This made him a super calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.
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12/27/2015 11:55:27 PM |
PURP"S comedy club | Page 2 |
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purplesky56
Pearcy, AR
63, joined Nov. 2010
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yuck..he needed to be better to himself
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12/28/2015 11:59:59 AM |
PURP"S comedy club | Page 2 |
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kennylooking4u
Victorville, CA
59, joined Dec. 2010
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Where's Wal...
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12/28/2015 4:52:46 PM |
PURP"S comedy club | Page 2 |
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packersbabe920
Green Bay, WI
52, joined Jul. 2013
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12/29/2015 4:27:19 AM |
PURP"S comedy club | Page 2 |
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purplesky56
Pearcy, AR
63, joined Nov. 2010
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Kenny you have me looking for something that's not there
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12/29/2015 7:42:15 AM |
PURP"S comedy club | Page 2 |
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lynyrd80
Wood River, NE
56, joined Jan. 2014
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The one with the mustache?
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12/29/2015 5:24:36 PM |
PURP"S comedy club | Page 2 |
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packersbabe920
Green Bay, WI
52, joined Jul. 2013
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Wow I almost not notice u
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12/30/2015 1:37:49 AM |
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purplesky56
Pearcy, AR
63, joined Nov. 2010
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there are several with staches lol..looking for waldos striped clothes lol.
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12/30/2015 4:29:50 PM |
PURP"S comedy club | Page 2 |
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kennylooking4u
Victorville, CA
59, joined Dec. 2010
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Hey!
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12/30/2015 5:43:12 PM |
PURP"S comedy club | Page 2 |
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packersbabe920
Green Bay, WI
52, joined Jul. 2013
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Cute
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12/30/2015 11:52:57 PM |
PURP"S comedy club | Page 2 |
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purplesky56
Pearcy, AR
63, joined Nov. 2010
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hey I think we have a winner there is waldo lol
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12/31/2015 5:43:55 PM |
PURP"S comedy club | Page 2 |
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packersbabe920
Green Bay, WI
52, joined Jul. 2013
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1/1/2016 3:15:26 AM |
PURP"S comedy club | Page 2 |
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purplesky56
Pearcy, AR
63, joined Nov. 2010
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well I went to a house party last night..never trust a Styrofoam cup from sonic..i had sitting between my legs and it broke...it was really cold akkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk..plus I was soaked and all down my legs...where is a depends when you need 1
it was embarresing but everyone got a good laugh.
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1/1/2016 3:28:38 PM |
PURP"S comedy club | Page 2 |
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packersbabe920
Green Bay, WI
52, joined Jul. 2013
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third depends would have save u
Happy New Year
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1/1/2016 6:36:45 PM |
PURP"S comedy club | Page 2 |
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kennylooking4u
Victorville, CA
59, joined Dec. 2010
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(this post has been flagged as inappropriate, sorry.)
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1/1/2016 7:49:23 PM |
PURP"S comedy club | Page 2 |
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purplesky56
Pearcy, AR
63, joined Nov. 2010
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that makes since kenny
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1/3/2016 7:48:47 PM |
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rfhar_54
Fouke, AR
63, joined Jul. 2012
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who on playing tonight
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1/3/2016 8:12:19 PM |
PURP"S comedy club | Page 2 |
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purplesky56
Pearcy, AR
63, joined Nov. 2010
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we are swing your bat..
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1/6/2016 5:12:16 AM |
PURP"S comedy club | Page 2 |
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purplesky56
Pearcy, AR
63, joined Nov. 2010
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somebody tell something funny that happened to you.
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1/6/2016 9:48:23 AM |
PURP"S comedy club | Page 2 |
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lynyrd80
Wood River, NE
56, joined Jan. 2014
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When you order Jumbo Shrimp, do you get big shrimp or a little Jumbo?
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1/7/2016 12:22:23 AM |
PURP"S comedy club | Page 2 |
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purplesky56
Pearcy, AR
63, joined Nov. 2010
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what what lol usually jumbo..lyn must have mini shrimp problems
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1/8/2016 8:40:43 AM |
PURP"S comedy club | Page 2 |
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lynyrd80
Wood River, NE
56, joined Jan. 2014
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what what lol usually jumbo..lyn must have mini shrimp problems
Old George Carlin joke.
Ever watch drunk people try to line-dance?
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1/9/2016 2:13:39 AM |
PURP"S comedy club | Page 2 |
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purplesky56
Pearcy, AR
63, joined Nov. 2010
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oh ii had shrimp last night..
never seen someone really drunk try to line dance..in the past wanted to dance really bad got up realized I was trying to fast dance with som3eone drunk help wasn't good
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1/9/2016 4:42:59 PM |
PURP"S comedy club | Page 2 |
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sorpstar
Little River, SC
65, joined Oct. 2009
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The Goldberg Brothers - The Inventors of the Automobile Air Conditioner
Here's a little fact for automotive buffs, or just to dazzle your friends.
The four Goldberg brothers, Lowell, Norman, Hiram, and Max, invented
and developed the first automobile air-conditioner. On
July 17, 1946 , the temperature in Detroit was 97 degrees.
The four brothers walked into old man Henry Ford's office and
sweet-talked his secretary into telling him that four gentlemen
were there with the most exciting innovation in the auto
industry since the electric starter.
Henry was curious and invited them into his office.
They refused and instead asked that he come out to the parking lot
to their car.
They persuaded him to get into the car, which was about 130
degrees, turned on the air conditioner, and cooled the car
off immediately.
The old man got very excited and invited them back to
the office, where he offered them $3 million for the patent.
The brothers refused, saying they would settle for $2 million, but
they wanted the recognition by having a label, 'The Goldberg
Air-Conditioner,' on the dashboard of each car in which
it was installed.
Now old man Ford was more than just a little anti-Jewish, and there
was no way he was going to put the Goldberg's name on two
million Fords.
They haggled back and forth for about two hours and finally agreed on
$4 million and that just their first names would be shown.
And so to this day, all Ford air conditioners show --
Lo, Norm, Hi, and Max -- on the controls.
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1/9/2016 8:34:50 PM |
PURP"S comedy club | Page 2 |
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purplesky56
Pearcy, AR
63, joined Nov. 2010
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interesting ....didn't now that they had a/c that early..we sure as heck had none during 50's or 60's ..oh wait yes I grew up very very poor..we couldn't probably afford the extra 100.00 it cost
the first a/c I remember was one of those installed seperatly 65 impala.
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1/10/2016 1:21:31 AM |
PURP"S comedy club | Page 2 |
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lynyrd80
Wood River, NE
56, joined Jan. 2014
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We had 2-60 AC. open 2 windows and drive 60 MPH.
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1/10/2016 11:46:11 AM |
PURP"S comedy club | Page 2 |
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mrroscoereturns
Ochopee, FL
59, joined Oct. 2015
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We had 2-60 AC. open 2 windows and drive 60 MPH.
Thats what we had to do too.. Seems like so long ago.. It's hard to find a car now without standard AC
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1/12/2016 1:00:06 AM |
PURP"S comedy club | Page 2 |
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purplesky56
Pearcy, AR
63, joined Nov. 2010
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We had 2-60 AC. open 2 windows and drive 60 MPH.
wasn't allowed that my mother beauty shop might have messed her hair up..
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1/12/2016 6:50:55 PM |
PURP"S comedy club | Page 2 |
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sorpstar
Little River, SC
65, joined Oct. 2009
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There were 5 of us in a brand new 1973 caddy belonging to Johnny sack that played on sopranos hbo tv show. On this nite I sat in back seat between 2 brothers each weighing more then 300 lbs back then on the way to NYC..I was initiated as both brothers started to silently fart and damn it, no AC was on or did they open the damn Windows. I fixed their asses as I went into a store and bought a can of bathroom spray before we went home...this time I sat in front seat and dared them to fart without prior notice but AC shoulda been on in my time of NEED...Fuhgeddabouit
[Edited 1/12/2016 6:51:41 PM ]
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1/14/2016 9:01:12 PM |
PURP"S comedy club | Page 2 |
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purplesky56
Pearcy, AR
63, joined Nov. 2010
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1/15/2016 9:02:26 AM |
PURP"S comedy club | Page 2 |
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lynyrd80
Wood River, NE
56, joined Jan. 2014
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1/16/2016 2:37:00 PM |
PURP"S comedy club | Page 2 |
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packersbabe920
Green Bay, WI
52, joined Jul. 2013
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1/17/2016 2:15:13 AM |
PURP"S comedy club | Page 2 |
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purplesky56
Pearcy, AR
63, joined Nov. 2010
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ok I see a trend
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1/17/2016 1:10:45 PM |
PURP"S comedy club | Page 2 |
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sorpstar
Little River, SC
65, joined Oct. 2009
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What is diff between an alligator and a crocodile...one will see you later and other will see soon...Fuhgeddabouit
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1/18/2016 8:35:18 AM |
PURP"S comedy club | Page 2 |
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lynyrd80
Wood River, NE
56, joined Jan. 2014
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What is diff between an alligator and a crocodile...one will see you later and other will see soon...Fuhgeddabouit
Don't forget Wally Gator.
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1/19/2016 6:54:39 PM |
PURP"S comedy club | Page 2 |
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rfhar_54
Fouke, AR
63, joined Jul. 2012
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dang nanners I told them to slow down
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1/20/2016 5:20:18 PM |
PURP"S comedy club | Page 2 |
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purplesky56
Pearcy, AR
63, joined Nov. 2010
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why does that purple banana getso lazy
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1/23/2016 3:30:19 AM |
PURP"S comedy club | Page 2 |
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purplesky56
Pearcy, AR
63, joined Nov. 2010
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well do you ever watch jerry springer..it can be commical
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1/23/2016 12:20:39 PM |
PURP"S comedy club | Page 2 |
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packersbabe920
Green Bay, WI
52, joined Jul. 2013
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especially when the women act a fool, then they find out, the baby not his
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1/23/2016 4:38:47 PM |
PURP"S comedy club | Page 2 |
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sorpstar
Little River, SC
65, joined Oct. 2009
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especially when the women act a fool, then they find out, the baby not his
Those shows with those outcomes are humorous babe...I met Jerry as a guest on a show...great guy but his show...Fuhgeddabouit
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