| 6/18/2014 11:21:49 AM |
The FUNNY Business Thread ! LOL | Page 39 |
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findingalicia
Lexington, KY
66, joined May. 2011
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Meet singles at DateHookup.dating, we're 100% free! Join now!
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| 6/18/2014 12:51:26 PM |
The FUNNY Business Thread ! LOL | Page 39 |
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bigbogiman
Corpus Christi, TX
64, joined Feb. 2011
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A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales.
The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because even though it was a very large mammal its throat was very small.
The little girl stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale.
Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale could not swallow a human; it was physically impossible.
The little girl said, 'When I get to heaven I will ask Jonah'.
The teacher asked, 'What if Jonah went to hell?'
The little girl replied, 'Then you ask him'.
A Kindergarten teacher was observing her classroom of children while they were drawing. She would occasionally walk around to see each child's work.
As she got to one little girl who was working diligently, she asked what the drawing was.
The girl replied, 'I'm drawing God.' The teacher paused and said, 'But no one knows what God looks like.'
Without missing a beat, or looking up from her drawing, the girl replied, 'They will in a minute.'
ASunday school teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments with her five and six year olds.
After explaining the commandment to 'honor' thy Father and thy Mother, she asked, 'Is there a commandment that teaches us how to treat our brothers and sisters?'
From the back, one little boy (the oldest of a family) answered, 'Thou shall not kill.'
One day a little girl was sitting and watching her mother do the dishes at the kitchen sink. She suddenly noticed that her mother had several strands of white hair sticking out in contrast on her brunette head.
She looked at her mother and inquisitively asked, 'Why are some of your hairs white, Mum?'
Her mother replied, 'Well, every time that you do something wrong and make me cry or unhappy, one of my hairs turns white.'
The little girl thought about this revelation for a while and then said, 'Mummy, how come ALL of grandma's hairs are white?'
I love this one!
The children had all been photographed, and the teacher was trying to persuade them each to buy a copy of the group picture.
'Just think how nice it will be to look at it when you are all grown up and say, 'There's Jennifer, she's a lawyer,' or 'That's Michael, He's a doctor.'
A small voice at the back of the room rang out, 'And there's the teacher, she's dead.'
A teacher was giving a lesson on the circulation of the blood. Trying to make the matter clearer, she said, 'Now, class, if I stood on my head, the blood, as you know, would run into it, and I would turn red in the face.'
'Yes,' the class said.
'Then why is it that while I am standing upright in the ordinary position the blood doesn't run into my feet?'
A little fellow shouted,'Cause your feet ain't empty.'
I LIKE THE NEXT ONE IN PARTICULAR
The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic elementary school for lunch. At the head of the table was a large pile of apples. The nun made a note, and posted on the apple tray:
'Take only ONE. God is watching.'
Moving further along the lunch line, at the other end of the table was a large pile of chocolate chip cookies.
A child had written a note, 'Take all you want. God is watching the apples....'
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| 6/18/2014 4:05:32 PM |
The FUNNY Business Thread ! LOL | Page 39 |
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gentlebear1949
Apple Creek, OH
67, joined Jul. 2008
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A good reason to not like summer.....
 ......
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| 6/18/2014 4:20:42 PM |
The FUNNY Business Thread ! LOL | Page 39 |
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cupocheer
Assumption, IL
68, joined May. 2010
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 Right! Good thing he's a boob man, eh?
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| 6/18/2014 5:05:17 PM |
The FUNNY Business Thread ! LOL | Page 39 |
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kennylooking4u
Victorville, CA
59, joined Dec. 2010
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| 6/20/2014 1:21:57 AM |
The FUNNY Business Thread ! LOL | Page 39 |
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kennylooking4u
Victorville, CA
59, joined Dec. 2010
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^ Thought that said Nigerian...
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| 6/20/2014 9:17:23 AM |
The FUNNY Business Thread ! LOL | Page 39 |
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gentlebear1949
Apple Creek, OH
67, joined Jul. 2008
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| 6/20/2014 7:00:33 PM |
The FUNNY Business Thread ! LOL | Page 39 |
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ray_licious
Georgetown, DE
56, joined Nov. 2012
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Jed Clampett: What do you think Pearl? You think I oughta move?
...
Cousin Pearl Bodine: Jed, how can you even ask? Look around you. You live eight miles from your nearest neighbor. You're overrun with skunks, possums, coyotes, and bobcats. You use kerosene lamps for light. You cook on a wood stove, summer and winter. You're drinkin' homemade moonshine, and washin' with homemade lye soap. And your bathroom is fifty feet from the house. And you ask should you move!?
...
Jed Clampett: [ponders all this] Yeah, I reckon you're right. Man'd be a dang fool to leave all this.
...
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| 6/21/2014 8:12:57 AM |
The FUNNY Business Thread ! LOL | Page 39 |
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findingalicia
Lexington, KY
66, joined May. 2011
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A blonde gets an opportunity to fly to a nearby country. She has never been on an airplane anywhere and was very excited and tense. As soon as she boarded the plane, a Boeing747, she started jumping in excitement, running over seat to seat and starts shouting, "BOEING! BOEING!! BOEING!!! BO....."
She sort of forgets where she is, even the pilot in the c*ck-pit hears the noise. Annoyed by the goings on, the Pilot comes out and shouts "Be silent!"
There was pin-drop silence everywhere and everybody is looking at the blonde and the angry Pilot. She stared at the pilot in silence for a moment, concentrated really hard, and all of a sudden started shouting, "OEING! OEING! OEING! OE...."
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| 6/21/2014 9:57:14 PM |
The FUNNY Business Thread ! LOL | Page 39 |
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kennylooking4u
Victorville, CA
59, joined Dec. 2010
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| 6/22/2014 7:40:05 AM |
The FUNNY Business Thread ! LOL | Page 39 |
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findingalicia
Lexington, KY
66, joined May. 2011
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| 6/22/2014 8:00:00 AM |
The FUNNY Business Thread ! LOL | Page 39 |
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gentlebear1949
Apple Creek, OH
67, joined Jul. 2008
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^^^^^^
The guy in this story did just that......
By Phil Trexler
Akron Beacon Journal staff writer
Published: June 20, 2014 - 11:36 AM
A Cuyahoga Falls man was cited by police for being naked while flying a kite at the Summit County Fairgrounds where a youth group was gathered.
The man, 82, was cited for disorderly conduct Wednesday afternoon when he was found at the fairgrounds in Tallmadge. Police say the kite-flying incident took place while a youth group was attending horse camp at the East Howe Road site.
Police say fairground workers first received a report of the bald, bespectacled man flying his kite near the old “air field” on the fairgrounds at about 1:40 p.m. A fairgrounds worker drove to the site and saw the man step out of his vehicle “and put on a pair of shorts.” He was wearing nothing else, police said.
When officers arrived, the man was seen “hurriedly packing his car.” He denied being naked, but when asked for his ID, police say he had to go through a pair of pants crumpled on the passenger seat.
Police say the man was rude and agitated but “eventually admitted to being nude at some point while being out in the field.” He was told never to return to the fairgrounds.
The man accepted the ban and told police he would instead go to the old Triple Crown in Munroe Falls to fly his kites.
“He was advised to remained fully clothed when flying his kites,” a police report shows. Officers say they also alerted Munroe Falls police.
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| 6/22/2014 4:01:19 PM |
The FUNNY Business Thread ! LOL | Page 39 |
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kennylooking4u
Victorville, CA
59, joined Dec. 2010
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| 6/22/2014 5:55:39 PM |
The FUNNY Business Thread ! LOL | Page 39 |
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findingalicia
Lexington, KY
66, joined May. 2011
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Well, Girl Potato and Boy Potato had eyes for each other, and finally they got
married, and had a little sweet potato, which they called 'Yam.'
Of course , they wanted the best for Yam.
When it was time, they told her about the facts of life.
They warned her about going out and getting half-baked, so she wouldn't get accidentally mashed, and get a bad name for herself like 'Hot Potato,' and end up with a bunch of Tater Tots.
Yam said not to worry, no Spud would get her into the sack and make a rotten potato out of her!
But on the other hand she wouldn't stay home and become a Couch Potato either.
She would get plenty of exercise so as not to be skinny like her Shoestring cousins.
When she went off to Europe, Mr. and Mrs. Potato told Yam to watch out for the hard-boiled guys from Ireland .
And the greasy guys from France called the French Fries. And when she went out west, to watch out for the Indians so she wouldn't get scalloped.
Yam said she would stay on the straight and narrow and wouldn't associate with those high class Yukon Gold's, or the ones from the other side of the tracks who advertise their trade on all the trucks that say, 'Frito Lay.'
Mr. and Mrs. Potato sent Yam to Idaho P.U. (that's Potato University ) so that when she graduated she'd really be in the Chips.
But in spit e of all they did for her, one-day Yam came home and announced she was going to marry Tom Brokaw.
Tom Brokaw!
Mr. and Mrs. Potato were very upset.
They told Yam she couldn't possibly marry Tom Brokaw because he's just....
A COMMONTATER
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| 6/22/2014 7:08:32 PM |
The FUNNY Business Thread ! LOL | Page 39 |
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ray_licious
Georgetown, DE
56, joined Nov. 2012
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| 6/22/2014 10:53:16 PM |
The FUNNY Business Thread ! LOL | Page 39 |
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kennylooking4u
Victorville, CA
59, joined Dec. 2010
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| 6/23/2014 6:30:22 AM |
The FUNNY Business Thread ! LOL | Page 39 |
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findingalicia
Lexington, KY
66, joined May. 2011
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Q: Why don't women like to drink beer on the beach?
A: They don't like getting sand in their Busch.
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| 6/23/2014 7:23:31 AM |
The FUNNY Business Thread ! LOL | Page 39 |
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ray_licious
Georgetown, DE
56, joined Nov. 2012
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That reminds me "we are out of milf, I mean MILK"!
...
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| 6/23/2014 10:22:47 PM |
The FUNNY Business Thread ! LOL | Page 39 |
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kennylooking4u
Victorville, CA
59, joined Dec. 2010
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| 6/23/2014 11:06:20 PM |
The FUNNY Business Thread ! LOL | Page 39 |
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findingalicia
Lexington, KY
66, joined May. 2011
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| 6/24/2014 10:22:27 AM |
The FUNNY Business Thread ! LOL | Page 39 |
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kennylooking4u
Victorville, CA
59, joined Dec. 2010
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| 6/24/2014 7:36:33 PM |
The FUNNY Business Thread ! LOL | Page 39 |
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findingalicia
Lexington, KY
66, joined May. 2011
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| 6/24/2014 8:06:20 PM |
The FUNNY Business Thread ! LOL | Page 39 |
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kennylooking4u
Victorville, CA
59, joined Dec. 2010
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Alicia
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| 6/24/2014 9:19:31 PM |
The FUNNY Business Thread ! LOL | Page 39 |
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cupocheer
Assumption, IL
68, joined May. 2010
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| 6/25/2014 11:39:36 PM |
The FUNNY Business Thread ! LOL | Page 39 |
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kennylooking4u
Victorville, CA
59, joined Dec. 2010
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Nice Catch!...
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| 6/26/2014 10:01:29 AM |
The FUNNY Business Thread ! LOL | Page 39 |
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findingalicia
Lexington, KY
66, joined May. 2011
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| 6/26/2014 3:10:32 PM |
The FUNNY Business Thread ! LOL | Page 39 |
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kennylooking4u
Victorville, CA
59, joined Dec. 2010
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| 6/26/2014 4:31:41 PM |
The FUNNY Business Thread ! LOL | Page 39 |
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sweetate2
Albion, IN
67, joined Jul. 2013
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Talk to the hand??
This reminds me of someone ::laughing in a funny way
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| 6/26/2014 5:39:02 PM |
The FUNNY Business Thread ! LOL | Page 39 |
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gentlebear1949
Apple Creek, OH
67, joined Jul. 2008
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| 6/27/2014 8:16:08 AM |
The FUNNY Business Thread ! LOL | Page 39 |
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kennylooking4u
Victorville, CA
59, joined Dec. 2010
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| 6/27/2014 8:17:00 AM |
The FUNNY Business Thread ! LOL | Page 39 |
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findingalicia
Lexington, KY
66, joined May. 2011
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| 6/27/2014 8:33:25 AM |
The FUNNY Business Thread ! LOL | Page 39 |
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kennylooking4u
Victorville, CA
59, joined Dec. 2010
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| 6/27/2014 8:36:55 AM |
The FUNNY Business Thread ! LOL | Page 39 |
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findingalicia
Lexington, KY
66, joined May. 2011
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TRUE!!
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| 6/27/2014 9:00:03 AM |
The FUNNY Business Thread ! LOL | Page 39 |
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kennylooking4u
Victorville, CA
59, joined Dec. 2010
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| 6/27/2014 12:40:18 PM |
The FUNNY Business Thread ! LOL | Page 39 |
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gentlebear1949
Apple Creek, OH
67, joined Jul. 2008
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A most enthusiastic customer (the woman)......
......
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| 6/27/2014 6:45:03 PM |
The FUNNY Business Thread ! LOL | Page 39 |
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ray_licious
Georgetown, DE
56, joined Nov. 2012
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| 6/28/2014 8:44:12 AM |
The FUNNY Business Thread ! LOL | Page 39 |
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findingalicia
Lexington, KY
66, joined May. 2011
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| 6/29/2014 9:40:07 AM |
The FUNNY Business Thread ! LOL | Page 39 |
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kennylooking4u
Victorville, CA
59, joined Dec. 2010
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| 6/29/2014 10:45:13 AM |
The FUNNY Business Thread ! LOL | Page 39 |
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findingalicia
Lexington, KY
66, joined May. 2011
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| 6/30/2014 1:51:40 AM |
The FUNNY Business Thread ! LOL | Page 39 |
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bigbogiman
Corpus Christi, TX
64, joined Feb. 2011
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I've had my king-size Craftmatic for 25 years. If I couldn't get back to sleep in the middle of the night I'd raise the head up and read. She'd be dumped out of bed. We should have gotten the split king.
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| 6/30/2014 11:50:39 PM |
The FUNNY Business Thread ! LOL | Page 39 |
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findingalicia
Lexington, KY
66, joined May. 2011
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| 7/1/2014 10:33:51 PM |
The FUNNY Business Thread ! LOL | Page 39 |
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findingalicia
Lexington, KY
66, joined May. 2011
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http://youtu.be/1_n7BAZwNi4
check it out..
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| 7/2/2014 10:57:16 AM |
The FUNNY Business Thread ! LOL | Page 39 |
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kennylooking4u
Victorville, CA
59, joined Dec. 2010
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| 7/2/2014 2:06:45 PM |
The FUNNY Business Thread ! LOL | Page 39 |
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gentlebear1949
Apple Creek, OH
67, joined Jul. 2008
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| 7/2/2014 6:18:57 PM |
The FUNNY Business Thread ! LOL | Page 39 |
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findingalicia
Lexington, KY
66, joined May. 2011
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| 7/2/2014 6:35:30 PM |
The FUNNY Business Thread ! LOL | Page 39 |
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ray_licious
Georgetown, DE
56, joined Nov. 2012
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| 7/3/2014 8:40:03 PM |
The FUNNY Business Thread ! LOL | Page 39 |
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findingalicia
Lexington, KY
66, joined May. 2011
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| 7/3/2014 10:48:24 PM |
The FUNNY Business Thread ! LOL | Page 39 |
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nat_now
Ocala, FL
58, joined Jul. 2013
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.
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| 7/4/2014 7:52:41 AM |
The FUNNY Business Thread ! LOL | Page 39 |
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gentlebear1949
Apple Creek, OH
67, joined Jul. 2008
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| 7/4/2014 8:38:15 AM |
The FUNNY Business Thread ! LOL | Page 39 |
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ray_licious
Georgetown, DE
56, joined Nov. 2012
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(this post has been flagged as inappropriate, sorry.)
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| 7/5/2014 7:44:33 PM |
The FUNNY Business Thread ! LOL | Page 39 |
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ray_licious
Georgetown, DE
56, joined Nov. 2012
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Sorry to say, but this was funny to me!!!
...
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| 7/5/2014 11:20:54 PM |
The FUNNY Business Thread ! LOL | Page 39 |
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kennylooking4u
Victorville, CA
59, joined Dec. 2010
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 Hey!What the...
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| 7/6/2014 7:39:53 AM |
The FUNNY Business Thread ! LOL | Page 39 |
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gentlebear1949
Apple Creek, OH
67, joined Jul. 2008
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| 7/6/2014 10:13:43 AM |
The FUNNY Business Thread ! LOL | Page 39 |
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findingalicia
Lexington, KY
66, joined May. 2011
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| 7/6/2014 2:40:23 PM |
The FUNNY Business Thread ! LOL | Page 39 |
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cupocheer
Assumption, IL
68, joined May. 2010
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| 7/6/2014 5:11:59 PM |
The FUNNY Business Thread ! LOL | Page 39 |
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kennylooking4u
Victorville, CA
59, joined Dec. 2010
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| 7/6/2014 5:13:06 PM |
The FUNNY Business Thread ! LOL | Page 39 |
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cupocheer
Assumption, IL
68, joined May. 2010
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[Edited 7/6/2014 5:13:32 PM ]
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| 7/6/2014 8:28:16 PM |
The FUNNY Business Thread ! LOL | Page 39 |
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ray_licious
Georgetown, DE
56, joined Nov. 2012
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Dude's Rights
...
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| 7/6/2014 9:42:13 PM |
The FUNNY Business Thread ! LOL | Page 39 |
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findingalicia
Lexington, KY
66, joined May. 2011
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| 7/6/2014 9:47:38 PM |
The FUNNY Business Thread ! LOL | Page 39 |
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redrver
Sedalia, MO
69, joined Aug. 2010
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hi, alicia..
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