| 6/19/2014 7:58:35 AM |
Dinner date attire |
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creekstomperr
Brush Creek, TN
57, joined Jan. 2014
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I think she could have made more of an effort, if not a dress, even a nice pair of slacks or even colored Jeans would be better than shorts. I mean you were going out to dinner; glad you had a good date anyway.
Agree , part of the fun of a date for me is getting ready for the date . What to wear , perfume , shoes , hair it's part of the fun and anticipation . It was dinner and a date. Everyone is different , thank God .
Meet singles at DateHookup.dating, we're 100% free! Join now!
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| 6/19/2014 8:01:03 AM |
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monarch50
Streamwood, IL
51, joined Apr. 2014
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Maybe I'm a bit old fashion, but I always dress nice for a meet, dinner date, bar, whatever the occasion. Even for a picnic, I would wear a nice pair of shorts, a nice shirt and a pair of nice sandals. I always do my hair and have some make up on. 
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| 6/19/2014 8:02:24 AM |
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pdforone
Litchfield, OH
65, joined Jul. 2010
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 Maybe she will be impressed that you are whining about what she wore on a first meet? You could always show her this thread and get her reaction?
If you ever get a chance to see her nekked? Is finding something to whine about a priority? 
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| 6/19/2014 8:05:27 AM |
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jester0011
Lake Waccamaw, NC
48, joined Jun. 2014
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i try and dress nice.no shiert hanging out.
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| 6/19/2014 8:09:08 AM |
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d__u__b
Athens, GA
51, joined Jul. 2012
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| 6/19/2014 8:15:48 AM |
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naturebiy
Bangkok
Thailand
40, joined Jul. 2011
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I always ask .. casual.. formal.. beach bum...
Communication actually works if used 
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| 6/19/2014 8:19:19 AM |
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boydboy
Saddle River, NJ
37, joined Dec. 2011
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She probably dressed ratty to give you a signal for how cheap you were being to take her to the Cheesecake Factory for a first date. The place is basically no different than an Applebee's, Chilis, Red Lobster, etc. They are the places ghetto people go on dates because they are too clueless to know what a real restaurant is.
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| 6/19/2014 8:20:28 AM |
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beautifulfire08
Antioch, TN
58, joined Aug. 2013
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She probably dressed ratty to give you a signal for how cheap you were being to take her to the Cheesecake Factory for a first date. The place is basically no different than an Applebee's, Chilis, Red Lobster, etc. They are the places ghetto people go on dates because they are too clueless to know what a real restaurant is.
Get real. Any of those places are fine. What a snob you are.
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| 6/19/2014 8:20:36 AM |
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zimzane2
High Point, NC
56, joined Jan. 2013
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Just show up with a dirty t shirt and shorts.
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| 6/19/2014 8:23:44 AM |
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keyboardkat
Oklahoma City, OK
41, joined Feb. 2011
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Just show up with a dirty t shirt and shorts.
Yeah!
Give her something to b*tch about for a change....
But seriously, is it really worth getting upset about if the rest of the date went well?
First world problems.....
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| 6/19/2014 8:25:33 AM |
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zombietrouble7
Knoxville, TN
50, joined Apr. 2014
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But seriously, is it really worth getting upset about if the rest of the date went well?
Best reply yet
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| 6/19/2014 8:29:33 AM |
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yetskimama
Walterboro, SC
66, joined Sep. 2011
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Best reply yet
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| 6/19/2014 8:42:00 AM |
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beautifulfire08
Antioch, TN
58, joined Aug. 2013
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That's not the best reply. So what if the date went well? That has nothing to do with the fact she didn't dress appropriately for the occasion.
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| 6/19/2014 8:44:06 AM |
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boydboy
Saddle River, NJ
37, joined Dec. 2011
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Get real. Any of those places are fine. What a snob you are.
Since when does having taste mean you're a snob? It's called being an adult and not a 17 year old kid who thinks cheap chain restaurants are real dining experiences. You're either dirt poor or clueless about the world outside of your dead little town if you can't see that.
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| 6/19/2014 8:52:02 AM |
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daneene
Allen Park, MI
52, joined Jan. 2014
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She probably dressed ratty to give you a signal for how cheap you were being to take her to the Cheesecake Factory for a first date. The place is basically no different than an Applebee's, Chilis, Red Lobster, etc. They are the places ghetto people go on dates because they are too clueless to know what a real restaurant is.
Pardon me, but that is a REALLY tacky comment. I've dated men who were rich AND poor, CEOs of companies and unemployed, and I was grateful TO ALL OF THEM for the gift of a meal or an outing no matter WHAT the cost was.
Holding yourself above others simply for their choice in eating establishments certainly makes YOU more ghetto than they in MY book.
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| 6/19/2014 8:53:26 AM |
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beautifulfire08
Antioch, TN
58, joined Aug. 2013
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Since when does having taste mean you're a snob? It's called being an adult and not a 17 year old kid who thinks cheap chain restaurants are real dining experiences. You're either dirt poor or clueless about the world outside of your dead little town if you can't see that.
LMFAO...The richest people I know (and I know some very rich people) shop at Walmart, go through the drive-through at McDonald's, and eat at Applebees on occasion. You're a f**king snob. Nashville is hardly a "dead little town," f**king moron.
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| 6/19/2014 8:54:13 AM |
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daneene
Allen Park, MI
52, joined Jan. 2014
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Since when does having taste mean you're a snob? It's called being an adult and not a 17 year old kid who thinks cheap chain restaurants are real dining experiences. You're either dirt poor or clueless about the world outside of your dead little town if you can't see that.
I think it's YOUR candy a** who's a bit clueless.
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| 6/19/2014 8:56:25 AM |
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d__u__b
Athens, GA
51, joined Jul. 2012
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Since when does having taste mean you're a snob? It's called being an adult and not a 17 year old kid who thinks cheap chain restaurants are real dining experiences. You're either dirt poor or clueless about the world outside of your dead little town if you can't see that.
and, what's wrong with either, mr big shot?
also, some people live in or come from areas that are much more casual than others; my hometown included.
there's not too many places in this college town where you wouldn't look properly in place in casual wear.
when people ARE dressed up, it's usually a contrived social event, and those participating look silly and out of place.
uppity.
one more thought...
maybe she planned on going somewhere a little more playful AFTER dinner, so felt dressed properly since they were just hitting a casual dinner joint.
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| 6/19/2014 9:18:44 AM |
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sir_hugo_drax
Big Timber, MT
24, joined Apr. 2014
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OP, I agree with you.
Anytime one is spending time with the opposite sex, in a formal or informal setting, some effort should be shown to one's appearance.
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| 6/19/2014 9:23:22 AM |
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fishnthec
Mesquite, TX
64, joined Oct. 2010
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Since when does having taste mean you're a snob? It's called being an adult and not a 17 year old kid who thinks cheap chain restaurants are real dining experiences. You're either dirt poor or clueless about the world outside of your dead little town if you can't see that.
There's nothing wrong with taking your date to 4 and 5 star restaurants, if that's your style.
And there is nothing wrong with taking your date to one of the nicer chain restaurants either, as the ones mentioned for example. Believe it or not, but those are the kinds of restaurants where most women feel the most comfortable in going anyway- most certainly on first dates. I found women to not be so impressed with the finer dining thing, to be perfectly honest.
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| 6/19/2014 9:27:58 AM |
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beautifulfire08
Antioch, TN
58, joined Aug. 2013
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There's nothing wrong with taking your date to 4 and 5 star restaurants, if that's your style.
And there is nothing wrong with taking your date to one of the nicer chain restaurants either, as the ones mentioned for example. Believe it or not, but those are the kinds of restaurants where most women feel the most comfortable in going anyway- most certainly on first dates. I found women to not be so impressed with the finer dining thing, to be perfectly honest.
I'm not impressed with so-called 4 and 5-star restaurants. Oftentimes, though the décor is very nice, the food sucks and is way overpriced. The best ribs I've ever eaten has been at little roadside shacks in neighborhoods you're likely to get a cap busted in your ass.
I'm not impressed at all by a man trying to impress me by spending money on me. I'd rather have a flower picked from the side of the road than a diamond necklace any day.
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| 6/19/2014 9:33:08 AM |
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eyesofmedusa
Cairo
Egypt
52, joined Jun. 2012
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Not a casual meet/greet. An actual dinner date. Ladies, you'd make an effort to look presentable right?
Had the meet/greet Sun. Went well and ended in a kiss. Called her Mon night and arranged a dinner date for tonight. I wore a nice button up shirt and good pair of pants. She wore an old t-shirt, jean shorts, and sandals like she was going to the beach. I actually felt uncomfortable walking into the restaurant because of how differently we were dressed.
Ironically, the date itself was awesome, and the good night send off was really passionate
. But I must admit, what she chose to wear REALLY rubbed me the wrong way.
You will ask her out again won't u Op ?
Last part is all you really care about...
Her attire..etc is moot as you hv proven with this thread...
And the ladies missed it...
Your hours if clothing selection...prep...etc..matters not...
All they care about is your fkabilty factor....if you hv it ?
Alll good....
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| 6/19/2014 9:35:44 AM |
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beautifulfire08
Antioch, TN
58, joined Aug. 2013
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LMAO...^^^ I was wondering if by "passionate" he meant he got laid.
So she was dressed like a street wh*re who was all too eager to put out on the first date...which then all of a sudden made it "okay." LMAO.
Still, IMO, she shouldn't have shown up in the attire she was wearing. Nice shorts and top is fine, but ratty old shorts and T? Nah.
[Edited 6/19/2014 9:36:03 AM ]
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| 6/19/2014 9:37:23 AM |
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creekstomperr
Brush Creek, TN
57, joined Jan. 2014
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Your hours if clothing selection...prep...etc..matters not...
Alll good....
It matters to me . It makes me happy . If I'm not happy ...... Well you know the rest . 
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| 6/19/2014 9:37:58 AM |
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1darksavior
Far Rockaway, NY
54, joined Mar. 2011
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look nothing wrong with Cheesecake or applebee's but i'm nt putting on slacks and a shirt to eat they'er , you have 4-5 star and you have casual spots like applebee's or chill's apple thinking someone will get dressed to go to the cheesecake is crazy you can if you like but i would have on flip flop cargo shorts muscle shirt maybe tank top
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| 6/19/2014 9:42:46 AM |
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cabanaariefedd
Norcross, GA
27, joined Dec. 2012
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look nothing wrong with Cheesecake or applebee's but i'm nt putting on slacks and a shirt to eat they'er , you have 4-5 star and you have casual spots like applebee's or chill's apple thinking someone will get dressed to go to the cheesecake is crazy you can if you like but i would have on flip flop cargo shorts muscle shirt maybe tank top
ikr lmao!
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| 6/19/2014 9:45:25 AM |
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sir_hugo_drax
Big Timber, MT
24, joined Apr. 2014
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I don't necessarily dress for the establishment. I dress for the occasion.
If I went to the Cheesecake Factory with my family or a bunch of frat brothers, I wouldn't dress the same as going to the Cheesecake Factory with a date.
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| 6/19/2014 9:47:50 AM |
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1darksavior
Far Rockaway, NY
54, joined Mar. 2011
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I don't necessarily dress for the establishment. I dress for the occasion.
If I went to the Cheesecake Factory with my family or a bunch of frat brothers, I wouldn't dress the same as going to the Cheesecake Factory with a date.
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| 6/19/2014 9:48:47 AM |
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miscbyproduct
Isle Of Man
United Kingdom
19, joined Apr. 2012
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MY RULE IS
i'll take the girl in shorts over the snob in the pearls
[Edited 6/19/2014 9:49:01 AM ]
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| 6/19/2014 9:49:34 AM |
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creekstomperr
Brush Creek, TN
57, joined Jan. 2014
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I don't necessarily dress for the establishment. I dress for the occasion.
If I went to the Cheesecake Factory with my family or a bunch of frat brothers, I wouldn't dress the same as going to the Cheesecake Factory with a date.
I see a keeper in the making .
<---------- a snob , I admit it on my profile .
[Edited 6/19/2014 9:51:27 AM ]
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| 6/19/2014 9:49:36 AM |
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sir_hugo_drax
Big Timber, MT
24, joined Apr. 2014
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I'm not familiar with that rule, thank god.
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| 6/19/2014 9:50:17 AM |
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eyesofmedusa
Cairo
Egypt
52, joined Jun. 2012
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Creek..if the woman does it for self ? 
However I agree with others....
I'm not sweating what I wld wear to Cheesecake ...Applebees..Chilis etc..
They are no diff than mcDonalds etc...just higher prices...
Food comes in prepared on trucks...
I don't go to these places...
However I noticed women taking the opprotunity to take down this other woman based on clothing choice...
When men really don't care..unless it makes her even more fkable...
That.........is all they give a damn about...
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| 6/19/2014 9:52:04 AM |
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miscbyproduct
Isle Of Man
United Kingdom
19, joined Apr. 2012
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I see a keeper in the making .
<---------- a snob , I admit it on my profile .
don't think i've ever looked
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| 6/19/2014 9:52:09 AM |
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sandycrabs
Land O Lakes, WI
48, joined May. 2011
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Sleeveless T-shirt, loud plaid shorts,knee high black socks, and flip flops.
Thats right I know to get my Swag on !
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| 6/19/2014 9:52:19 AM |
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sinceresammy
Dayton, OH
61, joined Mar. 2014
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I have all my dinner dates at Taco Bell, so it doesn't matter what she wears. I of course, wear my best pair of Birkenstocks, my Hawaiian shirt, and a clean pair of Polo cargo shorts!
Yuk yuk!
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| 6/19/2014 9:53:25 AM |
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creekstomperr
Brush Creek, TN
57, joined Jan. 2014
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@ eyes
I know Darling , it's all about me me me .
@ misc , I like messin with ya . But it is on my profile .
[Edited 6/19/2014 9:55:58 AM ]
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| 6/19/2014 9:54:18 AM |
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miscbyproduct
Isle Of Man
United Kingdom
19, joined Apr. 2012
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When men really don't care..unless it makes her even more fkable...
That.........is all they give a damn about...
i call you on that one
since when is jeans shorts more f'able than flipping a dress and expanding a pantyhose run?
[Edited 6/19/2014 9:54:42 AM ]
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| 6/19/2014 9:58:03 AM |
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miscbyproduct
Isle Of Man
United Kingdom
19, joined Apr. 2012
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Þ creek
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| 6/19/2014 9:58:25 AM |
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eyesofmedusa
Cairo
Egypt
52, joined Jun. 2012
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i call you on that one
since when is jeans shorts more f'able than flipping a dress and expanding a pantyhose run?
You just proved my point hun
Most men...are only looking for a fkable factor....end of game....
I'm sick of it......
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| 6/19/2014 9:58:31 AM |
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reader85037
Phoenix, AZ
41, joined Apr. 2014
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Cheesecake Factory. It isn't a five star restaurant
If the place you are going has a kids menu, there is no dress code.
They won't enforce it past "no shoes, no shirt, no service" and that's for insurance reasons.
If the restaurant isn't going to enforce a dress code, then you have absolutely no right
to do so through your expectations.
a dinner date should require a bit more effort than an old ratty t-shirt, jean shorts, and flip flop sandals.
The place you go determines the dress code.
Not your personal desires.
If it's your purview to determine what she wears does that mean you're gay if you're requiring her to wear anything at all, or more than lingerie?
I know if I had control over what women wore that would be pretty much it, unless they were like really fat.
She wore an old t-shirt, jean shorts, and sandals like she was going to the beach.Maybe she was giving you a hint as to where she wanted to go next.
when someone puts no effort into their appearance at all, it's like they're saying they don't give a shit.
Maybe they don't.
Of course she could also be thinking "I think this guy is looking for a trophy. I wonder if he expects me to try really hard. If I don't dress up and he has a hissy problem about me not dressing up, then he obviously gives a shit about the wrong things. So I am not going to dress up just to see what he cares about."
Or she might be going through "all men just want younger women. I'm scared of growing older and not being desirable to men anymore. So I am going to dress like a child so he see's me as younger and desirable rather than this old lady with uniform propriety."
There could be lots more going on than her not giving a shit.
Too bad communication sucks and you can't bring your problems up with her.
I do agree that the experience is ultimately what matters
Your experience was to have a problem with her dress, so...something negative was part of your experience.
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| 6/19/2014 9:59:34 AM |
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miscbyproduct
Isle Of Man
United Kingdom
19, joined Apr. 2012
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You just proved my point hun
Most men...are only looking for a fkable factor....end of game....
I'm sick of it......
ya to far over the edge
ya can see straight
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| 6/19/2014 10:04:36 AM |
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6969foryou
Sacramento, CA
38, joined Nov. 2012
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To a certain extent I feel she isn't trying hard to impress you. It's not a good or bad thing. You figure if its one of your first dates you would put in more effort in dress to impress.
In the end it's nice to walk in to a place and feel like you and your date are dressed equally for the occasion. We shouldn't forget to make the best out of any given situation and enjoy our date and the person we are out with, which is really what matters.
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| 6/19/2014 10:22:59 AM |
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georgeannlynn
Bremen, GA
44, joined May. 2011
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A thong has to be worn with most dresses. Might have been a day she couldn't wear a thong. Ask her if she will wear a dress for you next time. I like to discuss attire before the date.
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| 6/19/2014 10:29:42 AM |
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beautifulfire08
Antioch, TN
58, joined Aug. 2013
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A thong has to be worn with most dresses.
Bullshit.
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| 6/19/2014 10:33:01 AM |
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miscbyproduct
Isle Of Man
United Kingdom
19, joined Apr. 2012
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chanting
Return Girdles
Return Girdles
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| 6/19/2014 10:39:36 AM |
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lilithimagines
Oviedo, FL
44, joined May. 2014
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I don't necessarily dress for the establishment. I dress for the occasion.
If I went to the Cheesecake Factory with my family or a bunch of frat brothers, I wouldn't dress the same as going to the Cheesecake Factory with a date.
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| 6/19/2014 10:47:25 AM |
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esmeraldar
Toms River, NJ
68, joined Jan. 2009
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I do like to dress for comfort and don't have many dressy outfits that still fit. Around here most places are pretty casual so it doesn't matter that much.
Dare I say that if you really like her the way she dresses shouldn't matter that much? My last SO always wore the same thing no matter where he went and I really didn't care.
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| 6/19/2014 11:57:03 AM |
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d__u__b
Athens, GA
51, joined Jul. 2012
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wear whatcha wanna; it's cas-y'all...
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| 6/19/2014 12:16:17 PM |
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lookfamiliar
Portage, IN
59, joined May. 2014
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Maybe it was that time of the month
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| 6/19/2014 12:21:50 PM |
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upforfun007
Shippensburg, PA
42, joined Aug. 2011
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or maybe she dressed the way she usually would dress, so if things get serious later on, you already know what to expect, and will appreciate it more on the occasions she does dress up
ROLLS EYES!!
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| 6/19/2014 12:24:59 PM |
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beautifulfire08
Antioch, TN
58, joined Aug. 2013
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Groan..... 
On the night mentioned? It was made clear?
Oh, for God's sake. The woman would have to have been a complete f**king idiot to not know what he meant. And apparently, she is. LOL.
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| 6/19/2014 12:25:41 PM |
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beautifulfire08
Antioch, TN
58, joined Aug. 2013
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Maybe it was that time of the month 
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| 6/19/2014 12:26:09 PM |
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garfieldmaria
Litchfield, CT
39, joined Jun. 2014
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In such a dating situation, I've worn a dress shirt with collar and neck tie, dress slacks, and dress shoes.
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| 6/19/2014 12:27:07 PM |
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lovethelake17
Henderson, NV
57, joined May. 2009
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I got only to page 4 before commenting.
Let me get this right. Some of y'all think that it was OK to dress as she did because the restaurant was no big deal. It doesn't matter that she's going out with a new guy with all the wonderful possibilities of that ahead of her. It's all about the restaurant and not who she's going with? She doesn't have to clean up at all because it's not a five star place?
She has to be told what to wear? It's all his fault because he didn't spell it out for her that he demanded to see her in the dress he repeatedly mentioned? So not only is it his fault, she's too stupid to understand?
But let me guess, if he had said "please wear that dress" not one of you now saying he should have told her to wear it would have chastised him for being controlling and having the audacity to tell a woman what to wear?
My thinking is is that it was some sort of a test, and that would have chapped my hide.
I think she's telling you clearly that you're not worth any extra effort on her part. If she can't even put forth the effort to dress at least as well as she would for work--assuming she doesn't work in shorts and sandals and old t-shirts--to meet a new person, she's telling you something quite clearly.
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| 6/19/2014 12:27:30 PM |
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lilod
Aurora, IL
50, joined Aug. 2012
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Has it really come to the point where people have to discuss what they're wearing? Shouldn't some things fall under common sense? If you have a dinner date at a relatively nice place, you put some effort into what you're wearing.
The problem is that "common sense" in this arena is based on the social norms of the people you usually hang out with. Clearly, in this woman's social circles, the standard for dressing for dinner out is different from what you're accustomed to. It's not a big deal; it's something you have different views on which isn't really all that important and can easily be compromised from either side (or both).
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| 6/19/2014 12:29:54 PM |
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d__u__b
Athens, GA
51, joined Jul. 2012
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In such a dating situation, I've worn a dress shirt with collar and neck tie, dress slacks, and dress shoes.
STFU TONYETTE!!! 
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| 6/19/2014 12:32:52 PM |
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d__u__b
Athens, GA
51, joined Jul. 2012
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...My thinking is is that it was some sort of a test, and that would have chapped my hide...
'tests' chap my hide also. 
on the other hand, she may have just been a 'this is who i am' kinda gal.
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| 6/19/2014 12:33:27 PM |
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d__u__b
Athens, GA
51, joined Jul. 2012
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The problem is that "common sense" in this arena is based on the social norms of the people you usually hang out with. Clearly, in this woman's social circles, the standard for dressing for dinner out is different from what you're accustomed to. It's not a big deal; it's something you have different views on which isn't really all that important and can easily be compromised from either side (or both).
qft
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| 6/19/2014 12:37:39 PM |
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lovethelake17
Henderson, NV
57, joined May. 2009
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'tests' chap my hide also.
on the other hand, she may have just been a 'this is who i am' kinda gal.
Which would have also chapped my hide.
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| 6/19/2014 12:37:51 PM |
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garfieldmaria
Litchfield, CT
39, joined Jun. 2014
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The woman on the date should be dressed classy, not trashy or skanky!
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