Understood Fire...

However not all of us are the same..and we are all struggling to be seen as individuals ..aren't we ?

Our gender has fought like hell for the freedom of choice ..in all things.

I hv absolutely no problem with women who choose to ..."doll up" if it is their thing....

What I'm having issues with is being judged as less than by not being one of those women.

I hv 14 hr day..I am not doing all of this. I am also not wanting to be seen as perfectly put together..it sets up expectations..or has in my world.

I hv been " better" dressed than the man I went out with a time or two....it didn't affect how I saw the man.

I was there for him..not his clothing.

Again, my issue is being told if I'm not taking hours of effort to impress him...that I'm not following the expectations of society to ve considered a woman who prides herself.

How I look ? Affects no one.....how I think and treat others ? Does.

He said "pride"..scroll up...as for the rest...I covered it.....

You like to dress to impress..you clearly stated it....and that's fine.

I don't....and that should also be
okay....

My hair is uncontrollable...my nails usually are unpolished...I don't hv them.nor my toes done.

I wear office attire..it is pretty much all I own..not investing in " dating attire" ...I dint wear heels..ever..I own one floor length skirt..no dresses...

I don't do what many apparently think I should...and I'm okay with it...

I am clean..smell good...hardly any makeup...don't shave my legs..don't hv to....no hair..

Meh, no biggie....it's only CF.

If she wore it to be comfy, no problem.

If she wore it to be contentious, then it would probably be a short date anyway.

The way I read it, the OP still thought she was attractive enough for a 'passionate send off'....so b*tching about her attire AFTER it wasn't enough to deter the tonsil hockey is pretty lame.

No, typically, I don't dress to impress anyone but ME.

But, again, if I even go out with a guy (you have to understand I almost never accept a date with a guy, unless I REALLLLLLYYYYY REALLYYYYYY like him!), so maybe I'm thinking along those lines and, as such, I sure do want to impress him. And I don't mean it in the way that it might sound...I don't mean I'm wanting to impress him because he might think less of me because I don't -- frankly, I couldn't care the f**k less. I think you should know by now how little I give a shit what people think of me. I just mean I want him to go WOWWWW, not, Oh. Wow. Get it?

How'd you get by with having NO hair on your legs?

I don't do my nails. I work too hard to have polished, manicured nails. I don't have fancy clothes. But I am not going to show up for a first date in sloppy a** shorts and T. Nope, no way.

Second or third date, depending on where we go, I'll wear what I'm most comfortable wearing, which is either going to be nice shorts and top, or a comfortable sundress in warm weather, and jeans and sweater or a warm dress, like a sweater dress and boots in cold weater. That's me. I don't wear high heels, I don't wear frills, and I don't wear lace. Ew.

Same with the bedroom. If it's the first time I'm sleeping with a guy, in the beginning of an intimate relationship, I'm not going to emerge from my morning twoilette wearing dirty spongebob squarepants footie pajammies, I'm going to have on something sexy. Not slutty, mind you, SEXY. Some really pretty ling-er-ie. You know...one of them peng noirs!

A naked tater..

@lovesmart:

I don't dress nicely hoping that's what's going to make a guy like me.

You're missing the point.


@lovesmart, and he likely didn't have a reason to have a problem with what she was wearing on their first meet and greet. But this was a first DATE.

He apparently had no problem with the way she looked on their meet and greet.

Not a casual meet/greet. An actual dinner date. Ladies, you'd make an effort to look presentable right?

Had the meet/greet Sun. Went well and ended in a kiss. Called her Mon night and arranged a dinner date for tonight. I wore a nice button up shirt and good pair of pants. She wore an old t-shirt, jean shorts, and sandals like she was going to the beach. I actually felt uncomfortable walking into the restaurant because of how differently we were dressed.

Ironically, the date itself was awesome, and the good night send off was really passionate. But I must admit, what she chose to wear REALLY rubbed me the wrong way.

No it doesn't. You are deciding that. She may have had no idea that you were dress casual and assumed based on your meet and greet outdoors that you were a casual kinda guy. If you can not communicate upfront how you were going to dress for the dinner, then she has no reason to believe it was a necessity to be dressier.

And sad how many....refuse to see the attempt at manipulation....


Hi hun

Old t-shirt and jean shorts, is not casual either, it's sloppy. If you are going on a date, especially a date at the early on stages...you make an effort, regardless of the location.

His word was 'direct'
Lol
That isn't asking, either.